I can melt ice by staring at it, just takes a little time, less time in the summers.
@joshiesmith74874 жыл бұрын
Holy shit! Say hello to Professor Xavier for me.
@thunderpooch4 жыл бұрын
Me too, my mental energie is just so much higher in the summer.
@test50934 жыл бұрын
You're like nuclear man from superman 4. The sun's give you more power, more power = less time
@obamaspaghettitoiletsauce91504 жыл бұрын
Strange I can do the same thing Let's form a superhero team together
@aniket83504 жыл бұрын
I can kill with a look. I look in the mirror, and my self esteem dies, just like that.
@difficultbastard4 жыл бұрын
everyone has a plan until they get flicked across the back
@inoculati0n3 жыл бұрын
That made me laugh out loud. You win at internets sir.
@jimmywrangles3 жыл бұрын
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 yupp fair dinkum
@john.jai.sullivan3 жыл бұрын
laughing so hard omg
@krumpetsal3 жыл бұрын
Just be glad he didn't release the advanced tutorial on nipple flicking to the internet. Public's not ready for that shit.
@keepinmahprivacy97543 жыл бұрын
Nice one ☺️
@bdup41733 жыл бұрын
As a bouncer I have learned that most people have no idea how to actually fight, most people freeze up at real violence
@mikekeltner4291 Жыл бұрын
And how very few know the actual worth of a good SLAP to the face by a large guys hand. 👋💢😵💫
@peterbenson2185 Жыл бұрын
Must have been at a gay club in a nice neighborhood 😁
@josiahcamacho658 Жыл бұрын
@@josiahcamacho658 No, it's a technique that uses psychology and physiology.
@peterbenson2185 Жыл бұрын
You have a very dangerous job, actually I am womdering can you describe how you react to very stressful situations where your life could be in danger? From a psychological perspective, how you force yourself to be calm in those circumstances?
@johnnyblack612 Жыл бұрын
@@peterbenson2185 Very true, simple open hand strike can be a good factory reset button for somebody’s ego.
@dylanmorgan2752 Жыл бұрын
Jamie's "How's he alive?" at 3:46 gets me every time
@cuhtastic3946 Жыл бұрын
seriously🤣🤣🤣
@valerianarush7108 ай бұрын
This guy teaches karate like a confident child at school who just watched kung fu movies all weekend
@trybunt4 жыл бұрын
Lool Kung fu panda?
@jdc43164 жыл бұрын
🤣
@JiveCinema4 жыл бұрын
@@jdc4316 BEGONE YOU UNCULTURED SWWWIINE
@ihatepartisans.71984 жыл бұрын
Napoleon Dynamite comes to mind
@peppigue4 жыл бұрын
I watched "Kung Pow: Enter the Fist". First I'll tire you out by absorbing all your blows with face to fist style. Then I'll follow up with a quick balls to the knee technique. And just when you think you have me I'll have you in the reverse guillotine position. I'll know I've won once I wake up in the hospital with a sore and swollen face.
@lordmoldybutt12604 жыл бұрын
This martial art is totally real. A guy killed someone the other day using it. They laughed to death...
@dennisgarage90284 жыл бұрын
Dennis Garage lmao best comment ever
@xyoungdipsetx4 жыл бұрын
Your stand up would cause more pain...
@manga30404 жыл бұрын
@@manga3040 Cringe 3040. Thanks.
@dennisgarage90284 жыл бұрын
I might die of this comment as well. Damn that was good
@prakharpandey23924 жыл бұрын
Dennis Garage 👀😭🤣
@rasavastar3084 жыл бұрын
That slap to the back at the end may be the best thing ever.
@HereonTubeYou Жыл бұрын
gave him a pat on the back for pretending he was hurt
@StaunchWheat87 Жыл бұрын
"I'm gonna attack the cervical disc through the carotid artery" killed me
@haydenphipps4923 Жыл бұрын
“It’s not really military he’s just wearing a military outfit” lmao gold
@Drumpro313 жыл бұрын
That’s my new favorite clip
@walmartlok48093 жыл бұрын
Elminster Highhell or it’s because nasa is a very famous and common organization and having a shirt that has the name or logo of a famous organization is not uncommon. Like how some people could have a hat that says US Air Force a shirt that says Harley-Davidson, that doesn’t mean that they are trying to pass off as a US army pilot or a motorcycle engineer. This guy in the video is actively trying to pass off his con as the truth by wearing those military clothes.
@yosephbuitrago8973 жыл бұрын
@Doctor Elminster I did some research and of course Joe wasn't a flat earther , even if he had been , the fact that he stoped being one would be a good proof of intellect . my sister who's 30 used to be a flat earther for several years , she eventually understood it was bs from ppl who don't even have degrees in anything related to science and are just spewing non provable nonsense like the dinosaurs didn't exist or whatever stupid story .
@thor83343 жыл бұрын
Doctor Elminster it was a jacket not the top of a space suit
@gage60823 жыл бұрын
@Doctor Elminster i don't think you do any research. Researched all of that and you're wrong about it all. Think you just read a bunch of comments and believed them all.
@ryancooper7803 жыл бұрын
This reminds me of something Tom Green said; “the human body is 80% water, so only 20% of me has to swim”
@redram51503 жыл бұрын
Lmao
@TH3USUALSUSPECT3 жыл бұрын
You committed tom green to memory?
@tokivikerness88633 жыл бұрын
I breathed HEAVILY through the nose on this one
@matthewgriever22893 жыл бұрын
🤣🤣
@Ghost70653 жыл бұрын
@@matthewgriever2289 i dont get his and your comment like does it get you angry?
@erenyeager50292 жыл бұрын
The limp noodle technique is by far the most deadly form of martial arts you can learn
@bobbyp7403 Жыл бұрын
Especially when thrown !! 😆😆
@wirelessuser4943 Жыл бұрын
You can get arrested and sent to prison using that technique. Very deadly that can only be taught by monks.
@MrWeareone777 Жыл бұрын
@@MrWeareone777 😂😂😂😂 Its the oldest form of combat.
@mikekoenig6467 Жыл бұрын
@@MrWeareone777 you have to register your arms at the governors house if you learn that style
@mikekoenig6467 Жыл бұрын
If someone has flabby grandma arms, be careful
@TheWildernessEnthusiast Жыл бұрын
I’ve seen this a million times and I’m still laughing at Joe laughing.
@bosco008 Жыл бұрын
Joe Rogan is clearly annoyed by people doing those kind of martial arts that would not work well, especially in MMA. He should just be honest about that rather than doing fake laughter. He should admit it angers him rather than pretending he finds it absolutely hilarious.
@thewholetruth5473 Жыл бұрын
@@thewholetruth5473 Calm down bud
@1sanitat1 Жыл бұрын
@@1sanitat1 Obviously I am very calm, but thanks. God bless.
@thewholetruth5473 Жыл бұрын
@@thewholetruth5473 Where are you coming up with those assumptions?? Lol it's like you want him to be angry about it? Or maybe _you're_ angry? 🤔 But anyway, I'm 99.9% sure Joe honestly thinks it's funny, because it is. What's there even to be mad about?
@lando8913 Жыл бұрын
@@lando8913 Well I am 99.99% sure that Joe is 😠. Thanks for your participation. God bless.
@thewholetruth5473 Жыл бұрын
Was waiting for this guy to randomly say “What the deuce?”
@smthone3 жыл бұрын
Bring me more wine
@nbtytdjdhdjd29013 жыл бұрын
Ugh.. this video is rewined.
@grayfox42393 жыл бұрын
Stewie chilled out as he got older. Used a machine to travel from the animated world to ours and talk to Joe Rogan.
@lonniedavis48943 жыл бұрын
Justin I’ll be sure to return all of the royalties I’ve received from it.
@smthone3 жыл бұрын
@Justin it wasn’t a copied comment first off. My “royalties” joke went over your head sadly, but you don’t appear to have a lot of comprehension skills anyway. It’s a KZhead comment section, I am not sure why you are getting so triggered over a comment on a video lol. Maybe the internet isn’t the place for you.
@smthone3 жыл бұрын
The best technique I've learned on YT was if you're in a choke at a streetfight, burn your opponents underarm with a lighter. Never lost a fight since that.
@mynona24912 жыл бұрын
Another great one is if someone pushes you in a standing position with both hands, immediately push them back in the same way. The act of pushing you has thrown their center of gravity forward of their feet, and you pushing them back instantly shifts that center of gravity in the opposite direction behind their feet. The rapid change from over reach to under reach will be enough to make most people stumble backward or fall over.
@SighNaps2 жыл бұрын
There was this quiet undersized kid on my block. Yeah he got picked on. Kids threw stuff at him at school. Well, one summer, a bigger kid picked on him and the small kid just snapped and grabbed him. They rolled around and the big kid was winning and then small kid bit the big kids face, like really bit him like an animal. There was blood everywhere and the big kid was screaming and crying like a girl. And it was understandable. His right cheek was torn open. The smaller kid didn’t bat an eye. He had blood all over his mouth. Anyway, the smaller kid’s father was a lawyer and the bigger kid’s family didn’t press charges for some reason. This was in the early 80s. Anyway, the small kid still kept being a loner and still kept being quiet and unassuming. But NOBODY. absolutely NOBODY in the neighborhood or at school messed with him. And it was that way through high school. He had the reputation of being batshit crazy even though nothing like that fight happened ever again
@youtubecommenter372 жыл бұрын
@@youtubecommenter37 I mean that's still better than bring your father's glock to school
@mynona24912 жыл бұрын
@@youtubecommenter37 easy protection and a safe several school years for that kid
@QuackSus2 жыл бұрын
Not to be attempted on a windy day.
@woopteedeewoopteedye2 жыл бұрын
Whenever I have a bad day, I watch this video just to watch Joe laugh at this guy. Brightens my day right up lol.
@dustinumholtz2864 Жыл бұрын
Even though his laughter was so obviously fake?
@thewholetruth5473 Жыл бұрын
@@thewholetruth5473Wasn't fake at all. You have no social skills.
@DinisBardino11 ай бұрын
Worse day I've had in months and this just about fixed it.
@ryanoconnor29156 ай бұрын
@@thewholetruth5473crazy that you don't know him personally yet you magically know personal things about him 😂 sorry buddy but anyone who knows psychology knows that that's not how laughs work, fake laughs can sound real and vice versa, it's ignorant and disingenuous to act like you can magically determine the validity of it
@anomaly32155 ай бұрын
Calm down
@user-bb3rx7mh8k16 күн бұрын
I once stared at a wall that was freshly painted. I swear that after two days of me staring at it, the paint actually dried! I scared even myself with my new found power, so I never tried it again. True story!
@21palica Жыл бұрын
I need you to visit me, I need my walls dried up too
@anshuuu9708 Жыл бұрын
@@XenonSCRB 🤣🤣
@anshuuu9708 Жыл бұрын
I have two black belts. My favorite is leather and cost $16 at The Gap.
@rogerkomula80575 жыл бұрын
That's a good deal..
@anmolsingh19265 жыл бұрын
I typically don't spend less than $30 on a belt. That's super cheap.
@younoobroflmao5 жыл бұрын
You need Anson belt
@user-il8yw5jb3p5 жыл бұрын
"In Okinawa, belt mean no need rope to hold up pants."
@cmdrdredd5 жыл бұрын
Got mine at H&M
@weirdscience83415 жыл бұрын
“I killed my hamster by staring at it” Quick jump cut “Look I did it” -stab wound in hamster
@josephmcclain64662 жыл бұрын
Fuckin pencil sticking out it’s back lmao
@kanegarvey31882 жыл бұрын
As a hamster owner, I do not feel so well...
@theelilac1132 жыл бұрын
@@kanegarvey3188 this got me dead 🤣
@cleanshoesbo2 жыл бұрын
I feel bad about this comment :(
@derrickjac2 жыл бұрын
This is fucked up.
@insalubriousdithyramb17422 жыл бұрын
I enjoy watching Joe... he's that kind of person or friend who is genuinely excited or interested in anything you discuss with or show him. It's so nice to see how genuine he is.
@MobiWanYT Жыл бұрын
I would be the same for 100 million lol
@redicej58439 ай бұрын
@@redicej5843 🤣🤣
@MobiWanYT9 ай бұрын
@@redicej5843 This was 4 years ago
@micahl88575 ай бұрын
Joe's reactions here are so great, I can replay every day. I love this.
@makattak3550 Жыл бұрын
"No, he died 50 years later. That's the thing about the dim-mak; you never know when it's going to take effect."
@gozer95563 жыл бұрын
So dangerous
@acelamoste11472 жыл бұрын
No wonder it's so great for self defense
@beenright51152 жыл бұрын
I’ve been the subject of actual dim-mak. The knockout is instant and it’s actual striking. Not whatever the fuck that was 😂
@DivergentDiveBomb2 жыл бұрын
@@DivergentDiveBomb It is. The "cotton punch" isn't really that "cotton". A punch or open hand hit to the solar plexus can really kill you.
@allcolorsareentombedinblack2 жыл бұрын
Legendary
@thatoneguy61652 жыл бұрын
Gentle fist style 8 trigrams 128 palms.
@austinsill42545 жыл бұрын
This needs more likes holy shit I laughed so fucking hard
@abhijitkulkarni18134 жыл бұрын
And second guy had hyuga eyes
@stanny1594 жыл бұрын
Lmfaooooo yoooo I’m dead af 🤣🤣🤣💀💀💀
@Shadow_of_Yharnam4 жыл бұрын
RIP neji hyuga
@SAJ.GAMING4 жыл бұрын
Austin Sill oh shit... Ur fucked now
@isaiahmontoya88314 жыл бұрын
I like how Joe was polite with this guest. They have good chemistry
@richardDara-ot9zp11 ай бұрын
2:00 most politest way to ask to use the bathroom i done ever heard 😅
@pyrexliving2413 Жыл бұрын
The Dwight Shrute School of Martial Arts is nothing to F around with.
@KD-bk7gd3 жыл бұрын
Dwight Shrute? Please! It's all about Rex Kwan Do!!
@marcosdelacerda98743 жыл бұрын
Fucker mad me look him up then remembered him from the office
@briantripoli53483 жыл бұрын
Marcos Delacerda, “you wouldn’t want to take a roundhouse kick with me wearing these bad boys” *points to American flag sweat pants*
@cgme70763 жыл бұрын
Marcos Delacerda I'm sad not more people appreciated this comment
@Oceanleighside3 жыл бұрын
Screw you all. I AM FRANK MOTHER FUCKING DUX!
@highjim77783 жыл бұрын
"The uh..." "The esophagus" "...airway" "Yea"
@Babbolozada4 жыл бұрын
The way Joe says "Yea" reminds me of how my dad listen to my white lies when I was little lmao
@ttimetotroll4 жыл бұрын
Don't take it the wrong way but oesophagus is spelled with an o at the start
@flamingburritto4 жыл бұрын
Abhinay K no it’s not
@nowei19304 жыл бұрын
Abhinay K, what country are you from? Canada?
@kyleorr5334 жыл бұрын
@@kyleorr533 you American? Thought as much. Americans always want the easy way out lol. Who tf thinks oesophagus is wrong? 😂
@anujjyothykumar46674 жыл бұрын
The ear poke and no-touch back slap is KEY, homie.🤣😂😂😂😆🤣
@TheRealSavageMaestro7 ай бұрын
Jamie pull up that video of a hamster fighting a grizzly bear.
@xzxvnxvw8 ай бұрын
Still can't find Waldo, but we found the guy who stole his glasses.
This is why I dont cosplay Waldo anymore. Hearing that shit like "OH I FOUND YOU!" is fun the first 5 times, but when you hear it 59 more times and people think they're like, the first person saying it to you TODAY or even EVER, it starts getting on your nerves. I know this was random on no one asks, I just fucking hate Waldo now. Must suck to ACTUALLY be him though because that's all people ever say to him. Ever
@DoppSkates4 жыл бұрын
"I'm Rex, founder of the Rex Kwon Do self-defense system! After one week with me in my dojo, you'll be prepared to defend yourself with the strength of a grizzly, the reflexes of a puma, and the wisdom of a man."
@Golden_God_Untethered4 жыл бұрын
Gosh!! How many wolverines can you kill?
@jamiecurley17204 жыл бұрын
@@jamiecurley1720 A frickin' 12-gauge, what do you think?
@Golden_God_Untethered4 жыл бұрын
"Break the wrist, and walk away."
@hermaeusmora29454 жыл бұрын
@@Golden_God_Untethered 😂
@jamiecurley17204 жыл бұрын
@@Golden_God_Untethered 😂
@jamiecurley17204 жыл бұрын
dudes showing you how to stop someone from pointing at you, a true hero
@_Landen_11 ай бұрын
Joe's got that laugh that could make the dead rise up and join in with laughing. I strive to be happy and healthy like Joe, not just for me, towards others as well.
@dougsnyder485010 ай бұрын
all ya got to do is just smoke pot, like me and joe
@user-sj3sx3rq7h5 ай бұрын
The poison hand technique that almost killed Baki, I believe it
@4mygirlfriend723 жыл бұрын
4MyGiRlFrIeNd who is Baki?
@rorsara39403 жыл бұрын
Sarah Netflix anime show
@thezyreick42893 жыл бұрын
TheZyreick lol now I feel dumb
@rorsara39403 жыл бұрын
🤣🤣🤣 I was thinkin the same thing when he said it
@nickg12233 жыл бұрын
yo i started baki like a week ago, and i was not expecting much out of it but gahdamn
@youkoszooo23473 жыл бұрын
Steven Seagal has left the chat.
@forsakenoutcast3 жыл бұрын
They did an episode on Steven Seagal . He’s legit
@DennyPlank3 жыл бұрын
@@DennyPlank hes legit, HOWEVER aikido sucks lol
@tonyzhang71293 жыл бұрын
Oohh buuurrn
@nakedninja27153 жыл бұрын
Old fat Steven has a lot of pain for you left in those hands.
@lowellcalavera60453 жыл бұрын
He’s legit it’s just his discipline isn’t very good in a fight
@Ruger343 жыл бұрын
“How is he alive?” 😂
@user-oy7oq2pw8h7 ай бұрын
The trick of breaking boards is how it's held. For example, if the grain is running horizontally and you hold the top and bottom, the board will break. If you hold the board opposite the wood grain direction( at both ends) the guy is more likely to injure his hand then break the board.
@rayleblanc7209 Жыл бұрын
Jamie actually had the best joke in the whole vid at 3:45...he said "how is he alive?" 😂🤣😂🤣
@titanfighter124 жыл бұрын
Jamie doesnt get enough credit man rofl. Rogan's always shutting his ass down 😂
@DoppSkates4 жыл бұрын
I know I'm glad you heard that to bc it put me in the floor and his timing was perfect
@henrytaff80674 жыл бұрын
Jamie is low key funny af xD
@hawk10934 жыл бұрын
nate means meant to say this: XD 1) An internet expression that gets annoying if overused. 2) What little kiddos spam when they are mad they realize the suck at roblox 3)The same kids using this term also use BAE; AF(AS FUCK), & therefore they all have Room Temp Intelligence Quotation & not 1 person on this planet changing the English Language to even dumber acronyms could score Triple Digits on the Mensa or Stanford Binet Test! 4)A symbol with X being the eyes and D being the Dick, to make it seem like the person has squinched eyes and a mouth wide open laughing w/ a cock in it. This is usually used to replace rofl, as the X for eyes indicates that they are laughing so hard they may have fallen out of their chair. Usually used in mmorpgs and chat lines. And highly used by GenZ who play Minecraft. 5)XD or xD is the most annoying internet expression ever created. It is used in funny moments,embarrassing moments and,stupid moments. XD is now used on all social medias applications. XD is ONLY said by kids. 6)And now; how it SHOULD be used in 2020: I keep the XD on me so I can pop her next time I see that pussy. 7)OR this is acceptable also... “Hitler was a GREAT Guy”! Response: xD? And he’s not ‘low key funny af’, he’s High Key witty humour with ☝🏻 line zingers. I think that’s what you meant to say; again...unless you’re 12 years old or simply retarded! 🤷🏼♂️ 🤣
@Only_Hater4 жыл бұрын
You have too much time on your hands if you sit around posting those kinds of comments buddy... ironic that you're telling on yourself whilst trying to take the intellectual high ground... I guess you missed psychology 101 on your way to the multiple PhD's you must have.... what I meant to say was... U gay AF xD
@hawk10934 жыл бұрын
I don't know what Joe is talking about... That guy hit me with the poison hand two weeks ago and I died right there on the spot instantly....... Well not then but he promised me that one day in the future i will die !
@dustencross3573 жыл бұрын
@Dusten Cross Hey 👋🏼 pal! Just curious, is your last name McFly like mine?! Because 29 years & nearly one more year to this day it happened to me!! But I have a friend who knows how to time travel & said by 2020 times will be the best to get help from doctors right out on the street 🤔 I like just got here & things seem strange. I’ll just go to New York, I’m sure they’ll fix me up?! Cheers
@krushgroovin75133 жыл бұрын
Is this a baki reference?!?
@luxurydevilcr99443 жыл бұрын
No idea! Mine was a Back to the Future reference!
@krushgroovin75133 жыл бұрын
Krush Groovin’ I didn’t mean yours, I know who’s Martin McFly xD
@luxurydevilcr99443 жыл бұрын
Nate: My bad Nate:) I shoulda realized we were talking about “fake” MMA’s CHEERS 😉
@krushgroovin75133 жыл бұрын
There are so many fakes it's highly entertaining, Frank Dux's is one of my favourites even fooled Hollywood 😂😂😂
@richardsullivan2749 Жыл бұрын
Anytime I need a good laugh I come back and watch this video 😂
@aaronsoto4622 Жыл бұрын
When I run out of toilet paper I use the poison hand technique.
@TheMAORIRULE5 жыл бұрын
TheMAORIRULE now. That's some funny shit right there!!!!
@Mad.Man.Marine5 жыл бұрын
TheMAORIRULE No. go on. tell us more. prison what...
@ji60505 жыл бұрын
John Price you like bending over for the soap?
@TheMAORIRULE5 жыл бұрын
We called it Ranger Wipe in the 80's lol
@larry405 жыл бұрын
Omfg 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😭 jesus christ that's fucking great. Best comment hands down
@AurelionTheStoic5 жыл бұрын
Every once in a while I feel Joe should have a regular joe interviewed just to spice things up.
@AlexS-lk6wu3 жыл бұрын
That would be pretty cool.
@brianmeehan88642 жыл бұрын
"picked up the kids last week from school, saw someone I went to highschool with, I was like, 'ah shit.' haha funny story huh? Don't ya just hate that! And how about those Mets huh?"
@ActionJackson6692 жыл бұрын
Like Theo Vaughn with the plumber
@abdulrabbani45202 жыл бұрын
@@abdulrabbani4520 i was about to say that Theo Von has done this numerous times.
@the_original_Bilb_Ono2 жыл бұрын
@@the_original_Bilb_Ono that was a legendary podcast lmfaoooo
@abdulrabbani45202 жыл бұрын
When I studied martial arts we'd use special plastic boards with sort of a jigsaw pattern down the middle. They're about an inch thick and have some material that greatly increases the friction along the center crack. We used them 1) cause you could reuse them and 2) cause joe is absolutely right the wooden boards are easy as shit to break
@walls_of_skulls6061 Жыл бұрын
So reusable boards are harder to break ? Hmmmm
@jimmyoryan2257 Жыл бұрын
@@jimmyoryan2257 yes, the point of them is to be hard to break. Wood is straight up easier to break than the stuff engineered for the job.
@walls_of_skulls6061 Жыл бұрын
@@walls_of_skulls6061 so that line down the middle never wears out. Cool I box we don’t break board and such
@jimmyoryan2257 Жыл бұрын
@@jimmyoryan2257 I never said they didn't wear down. Of course they wear down and get replaced. So what you box? You said yourself that you don't break boards
@walls_of_skulls6061 Жыл бұрын
@@walls_of_skulls6061 easy Tex I’m just sayin something designed to break wouldn’t seem like it’s harder to break than a wood plank, just quit breaking the board with ur head and u ll be alright
@jimmyoryan2257 Жыл бұрын
In either 2nd or 3rd grade I remember a school assembly and a guy came and was offering karate lessons and handed out flyers with the address and prices, but 2 of my classmates where students of his and they did a demonstration the best part was they brought out these planks of wood and started laying then across two blocks so they could break them but as they were setting up as if already broken they kept coming apart so when they finally got it all set up and where punching thru them expecting applause after each one the absolute silence they endured seared this memory into my brain
@remember_remember Жыл бұрын
That is the funniest thing I’ve heard in a long time
@lucyrados73373 ай бұрын
"I'm going to attack the cervical disc through the carotid artery." LMFAO
@BearPaw17834 жыл бұрын
It's the Choroidal Artery... You'll never learn the Super Ultimate Finger Death Strike unless you get the language correct.
@gooble694 жыл бұрын
Thank god you were here to correct me. I would have gone through my whole life thinking my neck is in my ass. Thank you.
@BearPaw17834 жыл бұрын
@@user-bc8ff8oi8k I bet you're an awful lot of fun to be around
@BearPaw17834 жыл бұрын
Your artery would be corroded after I get these poison hands on you.
@mrtoad14084 жыл бұрын
@@mrtoad1408 lol
@BearPaw17834 жыл бұрын
"Today we will show you the super ultimate death attack" *slaps like a girl*
@the_jones5284 жыл бұрын
Thats an insult to girls
@nyahsalvatore30374 жыл бұрын
@@nyahsalvatore3037 ok boomer
@the_jones5284 жыл бұрын
@@the_jones528 yea got em
@clitcrusader48974 жыл бұрын
@@the_jones528 wow so original and funny, how did you come up with that one
@soaringeagle95974 жыл бұрын
@@the_jones528 Boom! Headshot.
@raidunhinged19334 жыл бұрын
I love Joe's laughter! Puts me in a good mood.
@zeldaaddams2989 Жыл бұрын
Umm it was fake (or at least incredibly exaggerated) laughter. You really couldn't see that?
@thewholetruth5473 Жыл бұрын
He demonstrated the "underhand slap your friends beer while wearing a beret" technique. Impressive.
@jacobpettes335 Жыл бұрын
I really enjoy how genuine and strong Joe's laughter at these morons is.
@sultanofsick3 жыл бұрын
I could replay 4:40 for ever hahaha
@thesilentgamer11952 жыл бұрын
Morons? They are comics you fucking idiot they arent being serious with their moves.
@barakgooroo50822 жыл бұрын
I appreciate Joe Rogan's response is about breaking boards. I broke them as well in the late eights and early nineties; sometimes two at a time. The "fake " boards were harder to break; meaning a plastic/fiberglass board that you could slide or snap together. YMMV. Thank you.
@kyfriedhb1297 Жыл бұрын
It's the Leo and the inner kid comic wonder in him.:)
@carnos420 Жыл бұрын
Umm his "laughter" is obviously the opposite of "genuine". Joe Rogan is clearly annoyed by people doing those kind of martial arts that would not work well, especially in MMA. He should just be honest about that rather than doing fake laughter. He should admit it angers him rather than pretending he finds it absolutely hilarious.
Haha thought he said soft watermelon but ever what it was hilarious
@RayFinkle222662 жыл бұрын
😂😂😂
@naomizimik62022 жыл бұрын
Racist!!!
@ericcartman90422 жыл бұрын
Shouldn’t have watched this before trying to sleep. Had me dying and got my blood pressure all jacked up 😂
@jasjones6556 Жыл бұрын
“Get some dudes willing to stare at a goat” mannnnn I’m crying 😂😂😂
@goldenchild3265 Жыл бұрын
“In here is the uh...” Joe: “esophagus” “Airway” Joe: “yea” DEAD
@MrSerbia975 жыл бұрын
Lol i know that shit got me too
@marksullivan63195 жыл бұрын
trachea?????
@tc18175 жыл бұрын
@Nick Name which is why I said "trachea"
@tc18175 жыл бұрын
@Nick Name r/wooooooooooosh
@OXSkuldream5 жыл бұрын
Joe Rogan should host meme review
@ovoxo57935 жыл бұрын
whats really scary is that guy walks around and truly BELIEVES he's a bad ass.
@pb126614 жыл бұрын
Only till he eggs on a guy or gal that really is one...
@ShadeScarecrow4 жыл бұрын
He tells people he’s a Jedi
@thefloridamanofytcomments52644 жыл бұрын
I think Joe's guest does too
@jaykefleury22794 жыл бұрын
Well he never watched Emter the Dragon and learned that Boards don’t hit back.
@juliandavidhoffer20224 жыл бұрын
Highly doubt it. Most con artists are aware they are con artists unless duped into the role in a pyramid scheme etc.
@carsonhunt46424 жыл бұрын
I’d like Joe to do a series where he visits these different martial artists and allows them to demonstrate their techniques on him.
@dadmadedinner5456 Жыл бұрын
I'd like him to come see me and my phony technique so I could put him out of his delusional misery. I have 3 moves. Same moves I've always have used. All three are illegal in most sactioned fighting organizations. But Joe thinks fighting should be like a street fight so we would be a good match. I would kick his ass in 15 seconds or less and I'm willing to bet him a thousand dollars I can do it. Problem for Joe is, he will also go to the hospital as that is my main MO. Make sure I never have to fight you again.
@aliensarereal783211 ай бұрын
Bro when Jack broke all those bricks on kickin it 👀👀👀 serious legend
@austinwinchester Жыл бұрын
"I enjoy fake martial arts videos more than anything ".
@joecook56893 жыл бұрын
You forgot to add Joe "I enjoy fake martial arts videos more than anything" Rogan.
@CC-mr5xq3 жыл бұрын
@@CC-mr5xq Haha. I forgot.
@joecook56893 жыл бұрын
That's WWE but with some asian spice into it
@rafaelrp073 жыл бұрын
*almost anything
@nomadben3 жыл бұрын
@@nomadben was it almost? Still funny
@joecook56893 жыл бұрын
"Break the wrist and walk away"
@spicymilk4915 жыл бұрын
None of these guys go home to Starla at night. Forget about it.
@keylo68715 жыл бұрын
Should be top comment.
@floishaberry5 жыл бұрын
Lol thank you for that
@Videolegacy20055 жыл бұрын
@@keylo6871 KEK
@floishaberry5 жыл бұрын
Break the wrist break the arm disable to ground smash groin smash throat re smash groin to exit
@goldenbriccs22405 жыл бұрын
I'm just glad that Joe was having a good time again
@wadelescault2751 Жыл бұрын
I get a lot of enjoyment from Joe's enjoyment of fake martial arts. I have to come watch this occasionally. It tickles me at how excited he gets with this. Lol
@mitchellpierce6233 Жыл бұрын
"Oh its solid? Impenetrable. Its basically a brick wall" LMFAO
@arod17645 жыл бұрын
That was my favourite part! It's 6 am and I was laughing like a mad man ;)
@123456732605 жыл бұрын
"solid watermelon, it's impenetrable. a brickwall basically." xD xD i can't breathe
@TheWolvesCurse4 жыл бұрын
you need a clear airway
@martinschmidt24184 жыл бұрын
Now, if I drill a small hole in this watermelon and let it warm to around 98 degrees, it becomes the woman I so desperately need. This fuckin guy
@domeniccarson85114 жыл бұрын
@@martinschmidt2418 don't forget the ability to breathe
@stephenlee3064 жыл бұрын
Watermelon= lots of water. Human= lots of water. Punch through watermelon= kill human with stare
@lacari08054 жыл бұрын
I served under Major General Albert Stubblebine and I've been walking through watermelon ever since!
@hankhill78274 жыл бұрын
Please bring back Jon, Joe! This guy is a gem!
@blippitybloo7 ай бұрын
“Full screen please” You can see joes excitement for what he’s about to witness 😂
@xyz.8377 Жыл бұрын
Now apply this logic to many many many other professions. There are people with degrees and certificates that don't know anything lol. The world is filled with ppl trying to bs you
@redframe22623 жыл бұрын
Red Frame never a truer word said 👌👌👌
@markot5633 жыл бұрын
Wait a second. Are you trying to bs us?
@driverxone94533 жыл бұрын
@@driverxone9453 Everyone is trying to bs you! :D
@rudolfkratky363 жыл бұрын
@Dirk Walter he has the job. Thanks for the tip. I'm going to be the best python guy from North America next month.
@vicshephard92313 жыл бұрын
@A E "There are people" not " All people" you fucking troglodyte.
@novelas35363 жыл бұрын
The really sad part is the student that spends a fortune on this crap, to gain false confidence, then gets into a real fight and gets hospitalized or even killed.
@snapdragon93004 жыл бұрын
Usually you teach them how to avoid fighting. Dunno who everyone else learned under, but to be get into street fights is to fail your discipline.
@JS-kr8fs4 жыл бұрын
not sad, it's natural selection
@s1nnocense4 жыл бұрын
@John Small Why were you even brawling in the first place? In college, of all places?
@JS-kr8fs4 жыл бұрын
Even under the best scenarios people do get attacked often for no reason, is the logic being used in this thread its always your fault if your attacked , publically or privatly, and you should walk away, even when being repeatedly struck, WTF?
@snapdragon93004 жыл бұрын
@@snapdragon9300 There's almost always a reason, and there's no such thing as walking away when you're being struck.
@JS-kr8fs4 жыл бұрын
I love hearing him laugh like that 😂
@DEMartin673 Жыл бұрын
That “oh he broke his hand son” gets me everytime
@ShadyStephen Жыл бұрын
It looks like he’s wearing those fake nose and glasses, just missing the moustache lmao.
“You think anybody wants a roundhouse kick to the face while I’m wearing these bad boys??? Forget about it...”
@Antiheroosk8a4 жыл бұрын
hahaha!!
@alcasino9564 жыл бұрын
Was more scared of Starla
@kennethflores934 жыл бұрын
😂😂 Rex Kwon Do, we use the buddy system. No more flying solo. You need somebody watching your back at all times! - Rex's first rule
@spin-cthrowshands55534 жыл бұрын
Break the wrist & walk away... break the wrist... walk away.
@spin-cthrowshands55534 жыл бұрын
Ayee 🇬🇹
@veangeful34 жыл бұрын
I can never get bored.of Joe's show. It's so fascinating day by day. 👍. This episode reminds me of Rex Kwon do
@vinhvo2173 Жыл бұрын
Joe doing a show exposing fake martial arts teachers is something i want so bad.
@DukeOfAllPixels20 күн бұрын
Joe, apparently you didn't know that the military is moving towards armoring up all the soldiers and tanks with new watermelon armor.
@nickkautzman97114 жыл бұрын
Harder than a diamond
@michaelstephens94314 жыл бұрын
Gonna be alot of seed spitting
@matsuwd-emethdaath40024 жыл бұрын
I’m dead haha
@carverlindstrom90844 жыл бұрын
“Oh yeah I’ve been reading about that”
@carlmarston16874 жыл бұрын
With all its drawbacks, the battlefield will be looking a lot better, come spring :)) Tastier too..
@micaradu51084 жыл бұрын
Ryan Higa's "How to be Ninja" looks more legit than some of these clips...
@Amanda_D3 жыл бұрын
Omg how do you even remember that
@cracoviateam3 жыл бұрын
Amanda D you just brought me some memories well done 😂🙏🏼
@savagemowgli88023 жыл бұрын
@@savagemowgli8802 Glad I could help. ;D
@Amanda_D3 жыл бұрын
Real man of culture right here
@EliasPoint3 жыл бұрын
That's some OG youtube content right there
@yprinxe3 жыл бұрын
What we would do without these characters in society, they bring so much joy lol
@theoanniejude4300 Жыл бұрын
There's few things funnier than watching people who can't fight try to fight. It's like watching a cow roller skating
@wyldvigilante Жыл бұрын
"Solid watermelon!" "No way! That's impenetrable. That's basically a brick wall." Lost my shit.
@flumpyhumpy5 жыл бұрын
Snurt Groolan hiyaaaaaa my hand went right through! I pissed myself lol
@weenfain23215 жыл бұрын
You’ve never broken a brick wall with a wooden mallet? Fucking weak
@ChuckFinelyForever5 жыл бұрын
But what is a brick wall mostly made of? Atoms.
@Andyilmatto5 жыл бұрын
Joe "I'm gonna attack the cervical disk" Rogan
@darkplainsdrifter34993 жыл бұрын
Through the carotid artery lmao
@mayn90s193 жыл бұрын
I can't tell if your avatar is Noir or Jones inspired, but it looks great.
@TheAlison14563 жыл бұрын
@@TheAlison1456 Its actually Roland (the Gunslinger) from The Dark Tower. Thanks for the comment!
@darkplainsdrifter34993 жыл бұрын
That's how he got his wife pregnant.
@davidvondoom28532 жыл бұрын
He used a "rear naked choke" for maximum damage to the womb!
@darkplainsdrifter34992 жыл бұрын
This never gets old 😂😂😂😂😂😂
@1051_fam7 ай бұрын
Almost nothing makes me happier than hearing Ariel Halwani refer to Steven Segal and Sensei Segal. To his face, w/ a totally dead serious expression.
@justinmix143Ай бұрын
A customer at my dealership was bragging about his fitness routine and started telling our receptionist about his “rotor cuff”. He was trying very hard to sound like an expert and def was showing off for her. Turns out she is actually studying to be a PT and asked him if he meant to say “rotator cuff”? The look on his face was priceless.
@toutsen3 жыл бұрын
That is gold lol
@justacupomacaroni63873 жыл бұрын
Yess! 😂 My mother used to be a PT and she would catch people talking about “rotary cups” like they were medical pros She would just smile and walk away 🤣
@krismilstead41073 жыл бұрын
They say “No!, I am talking about the rotar cuff - its a lesser known part of the body - There is also a rotator cuff but I am talking about something different...... it’s in the same spot though
@billmeriwether6053 жыл бұрын
I watch this when I'm sad because Joe's laughter is so contagious lmao
@beetastik82193 жыл бұрын
True. Even after a really shitty day his laugh always cheers me up :D
@jerkkub Жыл бұрын
@@jerkkub bro, can you tell me who’s the guy on your profile pic? Thank you in advance
@acorpse.334 Жыл бұрын
Fake laughter is not contagious. Only real laughter is contagious. Regardless of how stoned he was, Joe Rogan was obviously being very fake with his "laughter" here.
@thewholetruth5473 Жыл бұрын
I love this guys energy, he is a great guest to keep rogan rolling and I appreciate the relaxed nature of his story telling allowing for commentary. Pretty funny shit
@standandelivery Жыл бұрын
Love the content absolute gold! The guest sounds like a voice actor for Cuagmire .. absolute legend
@gregv.856410 ай бұрын
“He stared at goats at Ft. Bragg”. Imagine hearing that phrase with no context.
@TheFishinPastor4 жыл бұрын
He stared at goats........cuz he is a perve
@tomlawrence39914 жыл бұрын
Standard night at a Fayette Nam strip club.
@silvermediastudio4 жыл бұрын
Honestly, having the full context doesn't really help the sentence fit any better with reality.
@johnladuke64754 жыл бұрын
@Michael Patti That movie had so much potential to be hilarious, but, it was just "meh".
@daveb.42684 жыл бұрын
They also do the live tissue training with goats for the SF medic course. I'm guessing it's those goats they use haha
@jmoultrie134 жыл бұрын
When the fake karate dude wipes the guys back off at the end of the technique, I almost pissed my pants...😂😂😂
@bossman93183 жыл бұрын
Joes laught makes the shit 10x funnier XD
@gabrielmoy48998 ай бұрын
Love Joe Rogan and Jon Ronson really 4 years went by fast
@slim1278 Жыл бұрын
Iam so dangerous that once I slap a guy and he died after 80years
@thesimpledevil48173 жыл бұрын
So how old are you?
@kursor523 жыл бұрын
@@kursor52 your mom
@yeleoh3 жыл бұрын
You didn’t think this one through bud. How old are you now ?
@Atwinterboy3 жыл бұрын
@@yeleoh My mom what?
@kursor523 жыл бұрын
@@kursor52 your mom I'll bet is a very nice person 😂
@user-vr8ve6rt9c3 жыл бұрын
The movie "The men who stare at goats" with George Clooney, Ewan McGregor, Jeff Bridges, and Kevin Spacey (among others) is based on this. Hilarious movie
@Adam-dy1vx3 жыл бұрын
That movie is so great I watched it on Netflix not too ridiculously long ago I’m not sure if it’s still on there I def suggest watching it anyone who sees this.
@lupomagnotto83063 жыл бұрын
It’s based on true tales from the CIA
@ChefClary603 жыл бұрын
Theres acid in the eggs. In the eggs? Yup and in the water. Sips coffee
@thedude77263 жыл бұрын
YES.....I was just commenting on this above. I vaguely remember that movie. Now I am going to find it and rewatch it. I particularly remember the scene where he tried to run through the wall and knocked himself senseless. THEN it seems the end of the movie was him attempting it again and then right at the last instant it ended the movie leaving you to ponder did he make it through the wall OR just knock himself out again?
@gregallen90653 жыл бұрын
I thought you were just joking, but holy shit, this is a real movie.
@henrikhubert42023 жыл бұрын
I can just imagine Joe’s guest sitting on the toilet hearing Joe’s muffled laughter like from the other room 😭
@quinnrussell2769 Жыл бұрын
I can't help but laugh when Joe starts cracking up.
@JAMwithGeoАй бұрын
Joe Rogan says “ it’s like they learn all these technical terms to make their bullshit more palatable” lmao 😂
@stevenc94503 жыл бұрын
Ah joe calling the kettle black there
@grahamers39333 жыл бұрын
Horse shit*
@dscuffman76793 жыл бұрын
@@grahamers3933, Joe is an expert at martial arts and for other topics he straight up says he doesn't know shit when he doesn't. What you referring to?
@Shark-hn4mv2 жыл бұрын
I love the limp hands slapping with no momentum. Imagine putting that up against an actual MMA fighter that's aggressive and resists.
@samisuhonen98153 жыл бұрын
Against any martial artist at all
@nikmacfarlane28063 жыл бұрын
@@nikmacfarlane2806 against the average pissed off Joe would be enough for him to realize it was useless
@democratsshoulddowhatpeped78363 жыл бұрын
Put that dude against a 70 year old grandmother with a cane lmao
@jasonberryman1035 Жыл бұрын
To me, the slaps sound like a door opening in the first wolfenstein 😂
@louisgoupil925 Жыл бұрын
Although i've seen most of these vids, with Joe Rogan, it's special.
@Jarulf44779 ай бұрын
New 'Rogan Reacts to martial arts videos' should be a thing
@frankdrake44775 жыл бұрын
I use the Triangle of Death when I go and destroy the toilet after a fierce battle with Taco Bell.
@Reaper62075 жыл бұрын
oh really? there is another technique called "flooding gates". it's the same, only difference is that the toilet is out of the equation.
@chrisharmon19855 жыл бұрын
Triangle of death is basically a tortilla chip
@AmaterasuOfOld4 жыл бұрын
You'll never defeat Taco Bell son....
@Peprteta4 жыл бұрын
Joe's reaction is the same as mine every time I see Steven Segal fight!!!
@mikesbigtank6015 Жыл бұрын
This would 100% work on me. I'd be bent over laughing, unable to move.
I can melt ice by staring at it, just takes a little time, less time in the summers.
Holy shit! Say hello to Professor Xavier for me.
Me too, my mental energie is just so much higher in the summer.
You're like nuclear man from superman 4. The sun's give you more power, more power = less time
Strange I can do the same thing Let's form a superhero team together
I can kill with a look. I look in the mirror, and my self esteem dies, just like that.
everyone has a plan until they get flicked across the back
That made me laugh out loud. You win at internets sir.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 yupp fair dinkum
laughing so hard omg
Just be glad he didn't release the advanced tutorial on nipple flicking to the internet. Public's not ready for that shit.
Nice one ☺️
As a bouncer I have learned that most people have no idea how to actually fight, most people freeze up at real violence
And how very few know the actual worth of a good SLAP to the face by a large guys hand. 👋💢😵💫
Must have been at a gay club in a nice neighborhood 😁
@@josiahcamacho658 No, it's a technique that uses psychology and physiology.
You have a very dangerous job, actually I am womdering can you describe how you react to very stressful situations where your life could be in danger? From a psychological perspective, how you force yourself to be calm in those circumstances?
@@peterbenson2185 Very true, simple open hand strike can be a good factory reset button for somebody’s ego.
Jamie's "How's he alive?" at 3:46 gets me every time
seriously🤣🤣🤣
This guy teaches karate like a confident child at school who just watched kung fu movies all weekend
Lool Kung fu panda?
🤣
@@jdc4316 BEGONE YOU UNCULTURED SWWWIINE
Napoleon Dynamite comes to mind
I watched "Kung Pow: Enter the Fist". First I'll tire you out by absorbing all your blows with face to fist style. Then I'll follow up with a quick balls to the knee technique. And just when you think you have me I'll have you in the reverse guillotine position. I'll know I've won once I wake up in the hospital with a sore and swollen face.
This martial art is totally real. A guy killed someone the other day using it. They laughed to death...
Dennis Garage lmao best comment ever
Your stand up would cause more pain...
@@manga3040 Cringe 3040. Thanks.
I might die of this comment as well. Damn that was good
Dennis Garage 👀😭🤣
That slap to the back at the end may be the best thing ever.
gave him a pat on the back for pretending he was hurt
"I'm gonna attack the cervical disc through the carotid artery" killed me
“It’s not really military he’s just wearing a military outfit” lmao gold
That’s my new favorite clip
Elminster Highhell or it’s because nasa is a very famous and common organization and having a shirt that has the name or logo of a famous organization is not uncommon. Like how some people could have a hat that says US Air Force a shirt that says Harley-Davidson, that doesn’t mean that they are trying to pass off as a US army pilot or a motorcycle engineer. This guy in the video is actively trying to pass off his con as the truth by wearing those military clothes.
@Doctor Elminster I did some research and of course Joe wasn't a flat earther , even if he had been , the fact that he stoped being one would be a good proof of intellect . my sister who's 30 used to be a flat earther for several years , she eventually understood it was bs from ppl who don't even have degrees in anything related to science and are just spewing non provable nonsense like the dinosaurs didn't exist or whatever stupid story .
Doctor Elminster it was a jacket not the top of a space suit
@Doctor Elminster i don't think you do any research. Researched all of that and you're wrong about it all. Think you just read a bunch of comments and believed them all.
This reminds me of something Tom Green said; “the human body is 80% water, so only 20% of me has to swim”
Lmao
You committed tom green to memory?
I breathed HEAVILY through the nose on this one
🤣🤣
@@matthewgriever2289 i dont get his and your comment like does it get you angry?
The limp noodle technique is by far the most deadly form of martial arts you can learn
Especially when thrown !! 😆😆
You can get arrested and sent to prison using that technique. Very deadly that can only be taught by monks.
@@MrWeareone777 😂😂😂😂 Its the oldest form of combat.
@@MrWeareone777 you have to register your arms at the governors house if you learn that style
If someone has flabby grandma arms, be careful
I’ve seen this a million times and I’m still laughing at Joe laughing.
Joe Rogan is clearly annoyed by people doing those kind of martial arts that would not work well, especially in MMA. He should just be honest about that rather than doing fake laughter. He should admit it angers him rather than pretending he finds it absolutely hilarious.
@@thewholetruth5473 Calm down bud
@@1sanitat1 Obviously I am very calm, but thanks. God bless.
@@thewholetruth5473 Where are you coming up with those assumptions?? Lol it's like you want him to be angry about it? Or maybe _you're_ angry? 🤔 But anyway, I'm 99.9% sure Joe honestly thinks it's funny, because it is. What's there even to be mad about?
@@lando8913 Well I am 99.99% sure that Joe is 😠. Thanks for your participation. God bless.
Was waiting for this guy to randomly say “What the deuce?”
Bring me more wine
Ugh.. this video is rewined.
Stewie chilled out as he got older. Used a machine to travel from the animated world to ours and talk to Joe Rogan.
Justin I’ll be sure to return all of the royalties I’ve received from it.
@Justin it wasn’t a copied comment first off. My “royalties” joke went over your head sadly, but you don’t appear to have a lot of comprehension skills anyway. It’s a KZhead comment section, I am not sure why you are getting so triggered over a comment on a video lol. Maybe the internet isn’t the place for you.
The best technique I've learned on YT was if you're in a choke at a streetfight, burn your opponents underarm with a lighter. Never lost a fight since that.
Another great one is if someone pushes you in a standing position with both hands, immediately push them back in the same way. The act of pushing you has thrown their center of gravity forward of their feet, and you pushing them back instantly shifts that center of gravity in the opposite direction behind their feet. The rapid change from over reach to under reach will be enough to make most people stumble backward or fall over.
There was this quiet undersized kid on my block. Yeah he got picked on. Kids threw stuff at him at school. Well, one summer, a bigger kid picked on him and the small kid just snapped and grabbed him. They rolled around and the big kid was winning and then small kid bit the big kids face, like really bit him like an animal. There was blood everywhere and the big kid was screaming and crying like a girl. And it was understandable. His right cheek was torn open. The smaller kid didn’t bat an eye. He had blood all over his mouth. Anyway, the smaller kid’s father was a lawyer and the bigger kid’s family didn’t press charges for some reason. This was in the early 80s. Anyway, the small kid still kept being a loner and still kept being quiet and unassuming. But NOBODY. absolutely NOBODY in the neighborhood or at school messed with him. And it was that way through high school. He had the reputation of being batshit crazy even though nothing like that fight happened ever again
@@youtubecommenter37 I mean that's still better than bring your father's glock to school
@@youtubecommenter37 easy protection and a safe several school years for that kid
Not to be attempted on a windy day.
Whenever I have a bad day, I watch this video just to watch Joe laugh at this guy. Brightens my day right up lol.
Even though his laughter was so obviously fake?
@@thewholetruth5473Wasn't fake at all. You have no social skills.
Worse day I've had in months and this just about fixed it.
@@thewholetruth5473crazy that you don't know him personally yet you magically know personal things about him 😂 sorry buddy but anyone who knows psychology knows that that's not how laughs work, fake laughs can sound real and vice versa, it's ignorant and disingenuous to act like you can magically determine the validity of it
Calm down
I once stared at a wall that was freshly painted. I swear that after two days of me staring at it, the paint actually dried! I scared even myself with my new found power, so I never tried it again. True story!
I need you to visit me, I need my walls dried up too
@@XenonSCRB 🤣🤣
I have two black belts. My favorite is leather and cost $16 at The Gap.
That's a good deal..
I typically don't spend less than $30 on a belt. That's super cheap.
You need Anson belt
"In Okinawa, belt mean no need rope to hold up pants."
Got mine at H&M
“I killed my hamster by staring at it” Quick jump cut “Look I did it” -stab wound in hamster
Fuckin pencil sticking out it’s back lmao
As a hamster owner, I do not feel so well...
@@kanegarvey3188 this got me dead 🤣
I feel bad about this comment :(
This is fucked up.
I enjoy watching Joe... he's that kind of person or friend who is genuinely excited or interested in anything you discuss with or show him. It's so nice to see how genuine he is.
I would be the same for 100 million lol
@@redicej5843 🤣🤣
@@redicej5843 This was 4 years ago
Joe's reactions here are so great, I can replay every day. I love this.
"No, he died 50 years later. That's the thing about the dim-mak; you never know when it's going to take effect."
So dangerous
No wonder it's so great for self defense
I’ve been the subject of actual dim-mak. The knockout is instant and it’s actual striking. Not whatever the fuck that was 😂
@@DivergentDiveBomb It is. The "cotton punch" isn't really that "cotton". A punch or open hand hit to the solar plexus can really kill you.
Legendary
Gentle fist style 8 trigrams 128 palms.
This needs more likes holy shit I laughed so fucking hard
And second guy had hyuga eyes
Lmfaooooo yoooo I’m dead af 🤣🤣🤣💀💀💀
RIP neji hyuga
Austin Sill oh shit... Ur fucked now
I like how Joe was polite with this guest. They have good chemistry
2:00 most politest way to ask to use the bathroom i done ever heard 😅
The Dwight Shrute School of Martial Arts is nothing to F around with.
Dwight Shrute? Please! It's all about Rex Kwan Do!!
Fucker mad me look him up then remembered him from the office
Marcos Delacerda, “you wouldn’t want to take a roundhouse kick with me wearing these bad boys” *points to American flag sweat pants*
Marcos Delacerda I'm sad not more people appreciated this comment
Screw you all. I AM FRANK MOTHER FUCKING DUX!
"The uh..." "The esophagus" "...airway" "Yea"
The way Joe says "Yea" reminds me of how my dad listen to my white lies when I was little lmao
Don't take it the wrong way but oesophagus is spelled with an o at the start
Abhinay K no it’s not
Abhinay K, what country are you from? Canada?
@@kyleorr533 you American? Thought as much. Americans always want the easy way out lol. Who tf thinks oesophagus is wrong? 😂
The ear poke and no-touch back slap is KEY, homie.🤣😂😂😂😆🤣
Jamie pull up that video of a hamster fighting a grizzly bear.
Still can't find Waldo, but we found the guy who stole his glasses.
Did 'im real dirty LMFAO
SuperN0va HAHAHAHAHAAH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
chael needs to stop scaring him into hiding
you made me laugh lmao
This is why I dont cosplay Waldo anymore. Hearing that shit like "OH I FOUND YOU!" is fun the first 5 times, but when you hear it 59 more times and people think they're like, the first person saying it to you TODAY or even EVER, it starts getting on your nerves. I know this was random on no one asks, I just fucking hate Waldo now. Must suck to ACTUALLY be him though because that's all people ever say to him. Ever
"I'm Rex, founder of the Rex Kwon Do self-defense system! After one week with me in my dojo, you'll be prepared to defend yourself with the strength of a grizzly, the reflexes of a puma, and the wisdom of a man."
Gosh!! How many wolverines can you kill?
@@jamiecurley1720 A frickin' 12-gauge, what do you think?
"Break the wrist, and walk away."
@@Golden_God_Untethered 😂
@@Golden_God_Untethered 😂
dudes showing you how to stop someone from pointing at you, a true hero
Joe's got that laugh that could make the dead rise up and join in with laughing. I strive to be happy and healthy like Joe, not just for me, towards others as well.
all ya got to do is just smoke pot, like me and joe
The poison hand technique that almost killed Baki, I believe it
4MyGiRlFrIeNd who is Baki?
Sarah Netflix anime show
TheZyreick lol now I feel dumb
🤣🤣🤣 I was thinkin the same thing when he said it
yo i started baki like a week ago, and i was not expecting much out of it but gahdamn
Steven Seagal has left the chat.
They did an episode on Steven Seagal . He’s legit
@@DennyPlank hes legit, HOWEVER aikido sucks lol
Oohh buuurrn
Old fat Steven has a lot of pain for you left in those hands.
He’s legit it’s just his discipline isn’t very good in a fight
“How is he alive?” 😂
The trick of breaking boards is how it's held. For example, if the grain is running horizontally and you hold the top and bottom, the board will break. If you hold the board opposite the wood grain direction( at both ends) the guy is more likely to injure his hand then break the board.
Jamie actually had the best joke in the whole vid at 3:45...he said "how is he alive?" 😂🤣😂🤣
Jamie doesnt get enough credit man rofl. Rogan's always shutting his ass down 😂
I know I'm glad you heard that to bc it put me in the floor and his timing was perfect
Jamie is low key funny af xD
nate means meant to say this: XD 1) An internet expression that gets annoying if overused. 2) What little kiddos spam when they are mad they realize the suck at roblox 3)The same kids using this term also use BAE; AF(AS FUCK), & therefore they all have Room Temp Intelligence Quotation & not 1 person on this planet changing the English Language to even dumber acronyms could score Triple Digits on the Mensa or Stanford Binet Test! 4)A symbol with X being the eyes and D being the Dick, to make it seem like the person has squinched eyes and a mouth wide open laughing w/ a cock in it. This is usually used to replace rofl, as the X for eyes indicates that they are laughing so hard they may have fallen out of their chair. Usually used in mmorpgs and chat lines. And highly used by GenZ who play Minecraft. 5)XD or xD is the most annoying internet expression ever created. It is used in funny moments,embarrassing moments and,stupid moments. XD is now used on all social medias applications. XD is ONLY said by kids. 6)And now; how it SHOULD be used in 2020: I keep the XD on me so I can pop her next time I see that pussy. 7)OR this is acceptable also... “Hitler was a GREAT Guy”! Response: xD? And he’s not ‘low key funny af’, he’s High Key witty humour with ☝🏻 line zingers. I think that’s what you meant to say; again...unless you’re 12 years old or simply retarded! 🤷🏼♂️ 🤣
You have too much time on your hands if you sit around posting those kinds of comments buddy... ironic that you're telling on yourself whilst trying to take the intellectual high ground... I guess you missed psychology 101 on your way to the multiple PhD's you must have.... what I meant to say was... U gay AF xD
I don't know what Joe is talking about... That guy hit me with the poison hand two weeks ago and I died right there on the spot instantly....... Well not then but he promised me that one day in the future i will die !
@Dusten Cross Hey 👋🏼 pal! Just curious, is your last name McFly like mine?! Because 29 years & nearly one more year to this day it happened to me!! But I have a friend who knows how to time travel & said by 2020 times will be the best to get help from doctors right out on the street 🤔 I like just got here & things seem strange. I’ll just go to New York, I’m sure they’ll fix me up?! Cheers
Is this a baki reference?!?
No idea! Mine was a Back to the Future reference!
Krush Groovin’ I didn’t mean yours, I know who’s Martin McFly xD
Nate: My bad Nate:) I shoulda realized we were talking about “fake” MMA’s CHEERS 😉
There are so many fakes it's highly entertaining, Frank Dux's is one of my favourites even fooled Hollywood 😂😂😂
Anytime I need a good laugh I come back and watch this video 😂
When I run out of toilet paper I use the poison hand technique.
TheMAORIRULE now. That's some funny shit right there!!!!
TheMAORIRULE No. go on. tell us more. prison what...
John Price you like bending over for the soap?
We called it Ranger Wipe in the 80's lol
Omfg 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😭 jesus christ that's fucking great. Best comment hands down
Every once in a while I feel Joe should have a regular joe interviewed just to spice things up.
That would be pretty cool.
"picked up the kids last week from school, saw someone I went to highschool with, I was like, 'ah shit.' haha funny story huh? Don't ya just hate that! And how about those Mets huh?"
Like Theo Vaughn with the plumber
@@abdulrabbani4520 i was about to say that Theo Von has done this numerous times.
@@the_original_Bilb_Ono that was a legendary podcast lmfaoooo
When I studied martial arts we'd use special plastic boards with sort of a jigsaw pattern down the middle. They're about an inch thick and have some material that greatly increases the friction along the center crack. We used them 1) cause you could reuse them and 2) cause joe is absolutely right the wooden boards are easy as shit to break
So reusable boards are harder to break ? Hmmmm
@@jimmyoryan2257 yes, the point of them is to be hard to break. Wood is straight up easier to break than the stuff engineered for the job.
@@walls_of_skulls6061 so that line down the middle never wears out. Cool I box we don’t break board and such
@@jimmyoryan2257 I never said they didn't wear down. Of course they wear down and get replaced. So what you box? You said yourself that you don't break boards
@@walls_of_skulls6061 easy Tex I’m just sayin something designed to break wouldn’t seem like it’s harder to break than a wood plank, just quit breaking the board with ur head and u ll be alright
In either 2nd or 3rd grade I remember a school assembly and a guy came and was offering karate lessons and handed out flyers with the address and prices, but 2 of my classmates where students of his and they did a demonstration the best part was they brought out these planks of wood and started laying then across two blocks so they could break them but as they were setting up as if already broken they kept coming apart so when they finally got it all set up and where punching thru them expecting applause after each one the absolute silence they endured seared this memory into my brain
That is the funniest thing I’ve heard in a long time
"I'm going to attack the cervical disc through the carotid artery." LMFAO
It's the Choroidal Artery... You'll never learn the Super Ultimate Finger Death Strike unless you get the language correct.
Thank god you were here to correct me. I would have gone through my whole life thinking my neck is in my ass. Thank you.
@@user-bc8ff8oi8k I bet you're an awful lot of fun to be around
Your artery would be corroded after I get these poison hands on you.
@@mrtoad1408 lol
"Today we will show you the super ultimate death attack" *slaps like a girl*
Thats an insult to girls
@@nyahsalvatore3037 ok boomer
@@the_jones528 yea got em
@@the_jones528 wow so original and funny, how did you come up with that one
@@the_jones528 Boom! Headshot.
I love Joe's laughter! Puts me in a good mood.
Umm it was fake (or at least incredibly exaggerated) laughter. You really couldn't see that?
He demonstrated the "underhand slap your friends beer while wearing a beret" technique. Impressive.
I really enjoy how genuine and strong Joe's laughter at these morons is.
I could replay 4:40 for ever hahaha
Morons? They are comics you fucking idiot they arent being serious with their moves.
I appreciate Joe Rogan's response is about breaking boards. I broke them as well in the late eights and early nineties; sometimes two at a time. The "fake " boards were harder to break; meaning a plastic/fiberglass board that you could slide or snap together. YMMV. Thank you.
It's the Leo and the inner kid comic wonder in him.:)
Umm his "laughter" is obviously the opposite of "genuine". Joe Rogan is clearly annoyed by people doing those kind of martial arts that would not work well, especially in MMA. He should just be honest about that rather than doing fake laughter. He should admit it angers him rather than pretending he finds it absolutely hilarious.
"Solid watermelon? Oh... that... that's impenetrable. That's basically a brick wall" savage!!
Haha thought he said soft watermelon but ever what it was hilarious
😂😂😂
Racist!!!
Shouldn’t have watched this before trying to sleep. Had me dying and got my blood pressure all jacked up 😂
“Get some dudes willing to stare at a goat” mannnnn I’m crying 😂😂😂
“In here is the uh...” Joe: “esophagus” “Airway” Joe: “yea” DEAD
Lol i know that shit got me too
trachea?????
@Nick Name which is why I said "trachea"
@Nick Name r/wooooooooooosh
Joe Rogan should host meme review
whats really scary is that guy walks around and truly BELIEVES he's a bad ass.
Only till he eggs on a guy or gal that really is one...
He tells people he’s a Jedi
I think Joe's guest does too
Well he never watched Emter the Dragon and learned that Boards don’t hit back.
Highly doubt it. Most con artists are aware they are con artists unless duped into the role in a pyramid scheme etc.
I’d like Joe to do a series where he visits these different martial artists and allows them to demonstrate their techniques on him.
I'd like him to come see me and my phony technique so I could put him out of his delusional misery. I have 3 moves. Same moves I've always have used. All three are illegal in most sactioned fighting organizations. But Joe thinks fighting should be like a street fight so we would be a good match. I would kick his ass in 15 seconds or less and I'm willing to bet him a thousand dollars I can do it. Problem for Joe is, he will also go to the hospital as that is my main MO. Make sure I never have to fight you again.
Bro when Jack broke all those bricks on kickin it 👀👀👀 serious legend
"I enjoy fake martial arts videos more than anything ".
You forgot to add Joe "I enjoy fake martial arts videos more than anything" Rogan.
@@CC-mr5xq Haha. I forgot.
That's WWE but with some asian spice into it
*almost anything
@@nomadben was it almost? Still funny
"Break the wrist and walk away"
None of these guys go home to Starla at night. Forget about it.
Should be top comment.
Lol thank you for that
@@keylo6871 KEK
Break the wrist break the arm disable to ground smash groin smash throat re smash groin to exit
I'm just glad that Joe was having a good time again
I get a lot of enjoyment from Joe's enjoyment of fake martial arts. I have to come watch this occasionally. It tickles me at how excited he gets with this. Lol
"Oh its solid? Impenetrable. Its basically a brick wall" LMFAO
That was my favourite part! It's 6 am and I was laughing like a mad man ;)
"solid watermelon, it's impenetrable. a brickwall basically." xD xD i can't breathe
you need a clear airway
Now, if I drill a small hole in this watermelon and let it warm to around 98 degrees, it becomes the woman I so desperately need. This fuckin guy
@@martinschmidt2418 don't forget the ability to breathe
Watermelon= lots of water. Human= lots of water. Punch through watermelon= kill human with stare
I served under Major General Albert Stubblebine and I've been walking through watermelon ever since!
Please bring back Jon, Joe! This guy is a gem!
“Full screen please” You can see joes excitement for what he’s about to witness 😂
Now apply this logic to many many many other professions. There are people with degrees and certificates that don't know anything lol. The world is filled with ppl trying to bs you
Red Frame never a truer word said 👌👌👌
Wait a second. Are you trying to bs us?
@@driverxone9453 Everyone is trying to bs you! :D
@Dirk Walter he has the job. Thanks for the tip. I'm going to be the best python guy from North America next month.
@A E "There are people" not " All people" you fucking troglodyte.
The really sad part is the student that spends a fortune on this crap, to gain false confidence, then gets into a real fight and gets hospitalized or even killed.
Usually you teach them how to avoid fighting. Dunno who everyone else learned under, but to be get into street fights is to fail your discipline.
not sad, it's natural selection
@John Small Why were you even brawling in the first place? In college, of all places?
Even under the best scenarios people do get attacked often for no reason, is the logic being used in this thread its always your fault if your attacked , publically or privatly, and you should walk away, even when being repeatedly struck, WTF?
@@snapdragon9300 There's almost always a reason, and there's no such thing as walking away when you're being struck.
I love hearing him laugh like that 😂
That “oh he broke his hand son” gets me everytime
It looks like he’s wearing those fake nose and glasses, just missing the moustache lmao.
It does lmfao
Jacob damn harsh
@@taranlightell1733 kzhead.info/sun/gsNtf8p8ZKmjeqs/bejne.html
lol
Omfg hahhaha
“You think anybody wants a roundhouse kick to the face while I’m wearing these bad boys??? Forget about it...”
hahaha!!
Was more scared of Starla
😂😂 Rex Kwon Do, we use the buddy system. No more flying solo. You need somebody watching your back at all times! - Rex's first rule
Break the wrist & walk away... break the wrist... walk away.
Ayee 🇬🇹
I can never get bored.of Joe's show. It's so fascinating day by day. 👍. This episode reminds me of Rex Kwon do
Joe doing a show exposing fake martial arts teachers is something i want so bad.
Joe, apparently you didn't know that the military is moving towards armoring up all the soldiers and tanks with new watermelon armor.
Harder than a diamond
Gonna be alot of seed spitting
I’m dead haha
“Oh yeah I’ve been reading about that”
With all its drawbacks, the battlefield will be looking a lot better, come spring :)) Tastier too..
Ryan Higa's "How to be Ninja" looks more legit than some of these clips...
Omg how do you even remember that
Amanda D you just brought me some memories well done 😂🙏🏼
@@savagemowgli8802 Glad I could help. ;D
Real man of culture right here
That's some OG youtube content right there
What we would do without these characters in society, they bring so much joy lol
There's few things funnier than watching people who can't fight try to fight. It's like watching a cow roller skating
"Solid watermelon!" "No way! That's impenetrable. That's basically a brick wall." Lost my shit.
Snurt Groolan hiyaaaaaa my hand went right through! I pissed myself lol
You’ve never broken a brick wall with a wooden mallet? Fucking weak
But what is a brick wall mostly made of? Atoms.
Joe "I'm gonna attack the cervical disk" Rogan
Through the carotid artery lmao
I can't tell if your avatar is Noir or Jones inspired, but it looks great.
@@TheAlison1456 Its actually Roland (the Gunslinger) from The Dark Tower. Thanks for the comment!
That's how he got his wife pregnant.
He used a "rear naked choke" for maximum damage to the womb!
This never gets old 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Almost nothing makes me happier than hearing Ariel Halwani refer to Steven Segal and Sensei Segal. To his face, w/ a totally dead serious expression.
A customer at my dealership was bragging about his fitness routine and started telling our receptionist about his “rotor cuff”. He was trying very hard to sound like an expert and def was showing off for her. Turns out she is actually studying to be a PT and asked him if he meant to say “rotator cuff”? The look on his face was priceless.
That is gold lol
Yess! 😂 My mother used to be a PT and she would catch people talking about “rotary cups” like they were medical pros She would just smile and walk away 🤣
They say “No!, I am talking about the rotar cuff - its a lesser known part of the body - There is also a rotator cuff but I am talking about something different...... it’s in the same spot though
I watch this when I'm sad because Joe's laughter is so contagious lmao
True. Even after a really shitty day his laugh always cheers me up :D
@@jerkkub bro, can you tell me who’s the guy on your profile pic? Thank you in advance
Fake laughter is not contagious. Only real laughter is contagious. Regardless of how stoned he was, Joe Rogan was obviously being very fake with his "laughter" here.
I love this guys energy, he is a great guest to keep rogan rolling and I appreciate the relaxed nature of his story telling allowing for commentary. Pretty funny shit
Love the content absolute gold! The guest sounds like a voice actor for Cuagmire .. absolute legend
“He stared at goats at Ft. Bragg”. Imagine hearing that phrase with no context.
He stared at goats........cuz he is a perve
Standard night at a Fayette Nam strip club.
Honestly, having the full context doesn't really help the sentence fit any better with reality.
@Michael Patti That movie had so much potential to be hilarious, but, it was just "meh".
They also do the live tissue training with goats for the SF medic course. I'm guessing it's those goats they use haha
When the fake karate dude wipes the guys back off at the end of the technique, I almost pissed my pants...😂😂😂
Joes laught makes the shit 10x funnier XD
Love Joe Rogan and Jon Ronson really 4 years went by fast
Iam so dangerous that once I slap a guy and he died after 80years
So how old are you?
@@kursor52 your mom
You didn’t think this one through bud. How old are you now ?
@@yeleoh My mom what?
@@kursor52 your mom I'll bet is a very nice person 😂
The movie "The men who stare at goats" with George Clooney, Ewan McGregor, Jeff Bridges, and Kevin Spacey (among others) is based on this. Hilarious movie
That movie is so great I watched it on Netflix not too ridiculously long ago I’m not sure if it’s still on there I def suggest watching it anyone who sees this.
It’s based on true tales from the CIA
Theres acid in the eggs. In the eggs? Yup and in the water. Sips coffee
YES.....I was just commenting on this above. I vaguely remember that movie. Now I am going to find it and rewatch it. I particularly remember the scene where he tried to run through the wall and knocked himself senseless. THEN it seems the end of the movie was him attempting it again and then right at the last instant it ended the movie leaving you to ponder did he make it through the wall OR just knock himself out again?
I thought you were just joking, but holy shit, this is a real movie.
I can just imagine Joe’s guest sitting on the toilet hearing Joe’s muffled laughter like from the other room 😭
I can't help but laugh when Joe starts cracking up.
Joe Rogan says “ it’s like they learn all these technical terms to make their bullshit more palatable” lmao 😂
Ah joe calling the kettle black there
Horse shit*
@@grahamers3933, Joe is an expert at martial arts and for other topics he straight up says he doesn't know shit when he doesn't. What you referring to?
I love the limp hands slapping with no momentum. Imagine putting that up against an actual MMA fighter that's aggressive and resists.
Against any martial artist at all
@@nikmacfarlane2806 against the average pissed off Joe would be enough for him to realize it was useless
Put that dude against a 70 year old grandmother with a cane lmao
To me, the slaps sound like a door opening in the first wolfenstein 😂
Although i've seen most of these vids, with Joe Rogan, it's special.
New 'Rogan Reacts to martial arts videos' should be a thing
I use the Triangle of Death when I go and destroy the toilet after a fierce battle with Taco Bell.
oh really? there is another technique called "flooding gates". it's the same, only difference is that the toilet is out of the equation.
Triangle of death is basically a tortilla chip
You'll never defeat Taco Bell son....
Joe's reaction is the same as mine every time I see Steven Segal fight!!!
This would 100% work on me. I'd be bent over laughing, unable to move.