Nessa Barrett ON How To Deal With Loneliness & Heal After A Breakup
I am so happy to welcome TikTok star-turned-singer, Nessa Barrett, to the podcast. After being named as one of Billboard’s “21 Under 21” twice and People Magazine’s “Emerging Artist List” - Nessa has gone on to accumulate more than 1.4 billion global streams to date.
Nessa opens up about her current struggles with loneliness, mental health, and an eating disorder. We will hear her deep thoughts and meaningful words about navigating a difficult breakup, recovering from codependency, and finding self-love amidst self-criticism. We will uncover the transformative power of love, both for ourselves and others.
If you’re struggling with loneliness or need guidance on how to heal after a breakup watch this!
In this conversation with Nessa Barrett, we discuss:
00:00 Intro
00:16 Running Away From Home
02:35 Overcoming Fear & Taking Risks
05:25 How To Deal With Bullying
07:24 Healing Your Relationships With Family
09:42 Struggling With Loneliness
14:25 Struggling With An Eating Disorder
28:50 Navigating A Public Breakup
33:01 What Are The Eight Stages Of A Breakup?
34:20 The Hardest Stage Of A Breakup
36:28 Recovering From Codependency
38:09 Post-Breakup Lessons
40:24 Healing & Finding Love Again
43:54 How To Practice Self-Love
48:03 What Is A Burn Box?
51:41 Using Music To Be A Voice For The Voiceless
54:36 The Importance Of Being Honest & Vulnerable
58:40 Nessa On Final Five
Episode Resources:
Nessa Barrett | / nessabarrett
Nessa Barrett | / @nessabarrett
Nessa Barrett | / nessaabarrett
Nessa Barrett | / nessabarrett
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What is your post-breakup advice?
Make sure you are comfortable being alone before you look for anyone else to add to your mix again. A true appreciation for solitude and alone time is a powerful thing. Having a strong sense of self and self love makes it easier to not settle for things that don't align with your values. Thanks again, Jay, another wonderful conversation, wonderful guest and advice 🙏❤️
Set yourself a time to cry it, talk about, scream about….after that fix your face and be the boss you know that your are and they lost. 🫶🏼🫂
Spend time loving yourself and with loved ones. Go on adventures, delve into your hobbies and find new ones. Explore new experiences, give love to others and be kind to yourself. With time you will heal ❤
The first step is to acknowledge that the relationship has ended. It is difficult, but tell yourself as much as you need to. Give yourself some grace, do not blame yourself (you can accept responsibility if you were the cause of the breakup or did something that caused the relationship to crumble), and wish things had turned out differently. Move forward after appreciating the relationship. Moving forward by allowing yourself to love and be loved, and above all, by loving yourself. Allow yourself time alone to assess what you want in a relationship and to consider what you will and will not compromise on.
Don’t go back to what made you leave in the 1st part.
For those feeling lonely, know that you are not alone.
🥺🫶🏼
How so?
Jesus❤
@@TonyStark-xz2nd I just wish I had everything to make him proud
@@louiskwizera The thing with God is that you don't need anything. You just need to run to him. His love is unconditional and nothing you do would make him see you as worthless. You are his masterpiece.
She ran away as a survival mechanism. She was afraid she was going to die. Maybe not physically, but in every way that mattered to her.
And she made her own opportunities. So much respect for that
"A voice for the voiceless" that is exactly how I would explain Nessa's music!
Oh yes thought i was the only one that think about that
This was a great interview. I didn't know much about nessa or her music but this showed a lot about her. She is such an intelligent young woman that grew up fast. It amazes me how in tuned with her emotions she is, and how fast her mind works. She is so young yet so connected with herself I've been binge watching episodes and this is one of my favorites
So glad you enjoyed the interview! Nessa is amazing.
Nessa is so insightful for her age, very articulate, and gifted with expression. I listened to this podcast on my morning walk, and I had to repeat certain parts.
Yes she is so amazing
Nessa looks younger than her years but speaks decades wiser, i hope people listen to her and not understimate some very well spoken points on self awareness
nessa has shown a lot of growth since when she started doing social media this definitely made me an official nessa barrett fan I adore her, I wish nothing but blessings towards her she has gone through so much for just a 20 year old
Thank you for having Nessa on the podcast, she’s so strong
Agreed!
Oh yes she is love hearing from her
I enjoyed this interview so much. I am trying to recover from a 35-year marriage breakup, and it touched my soul! Who said young people can not teach you a thing or two!!! Thank you NESSA!!! GOD Bless!😢😊❤
So many beautiful lessons from every walk of life. So much love as you are navigating your own new path.
No but same! I’m 36 and I’m listening to this!! 🥲
Who initiated the break-up?
Nessa checks every box for me as an artist. Her music is the words I think but cannot write on paper. The perspective and views on life she now has is incredible and makes me so proud. It's so cool to see me in such a cool artist. Makes me feel more comfortable and less alone with my BPD through her music. A blessed soul
my love & respect for nessa grows more & more each time i hear her speak. she’s such a light to our generation & world. i’ve seen her twice in concert (yay burn box) & have met her once, which have impacted me forever. truly a gem to our society & i wish nothing but the best for her. thank you for having her on
Oh yes likewise me
the fact that she’s so open about her struggles especially with anorexia it’s so hard for someone to come out and say they have that and that’s why they’ve lost weight not like many people in LA who just wanna be skinny and consider it the standard
Oh yes she is such a great
I’m 20 and I also struggle with my body and she explained exactly how I feel. Even talking about the words you use, my mom told me a few days ago I look healthier and more fuller than before and since then I’ve just been spiraling thinking about those words “healthy” and “fuller” making me change my ‘healthy’ trajectory. I’ve been staring at my food labels and I felt crazy. I’m just glad I’m not going through these things alone, and there must be so many other people going through this. I’m getting the help I need btw so it’s ok, I really am trying.
omgg this felt so open, honest and real. this interview felt like a warm hug i will always love nessa’s honesty and vulnerability it makes me feel so seen and connected and jay’s insight on the things she says it just felt like such a genuine conversation 🤍
Love her vulnerability and her honesty ❤ Thank you
Clarity is like a breath of fresh air. This is why conversation, even if it feels confusing, can be healing. Thank you for the clarity.
Before this interview with Nessa, I didn’t know of her. After listening to Nessa speak, I’ve fallen in love with her heart! What a wise and mature queen 🩷 sending love. Thanks for the episode x
Thank you Jay and thank you to your team for having nessa and all of these amazing creators. I’m almost in tears thank you for all you do and all of this , I’m feeling so greatful❤️❤️❤️
thank u so much for having ness on the podcast, she has helped so many of us and she is so strong.
this interview is so amazing. I'll def watch it twice a week from now ahah so comforting i'll forever love nessa
she grown so much. i remembered saw her first ever interview. forever proud of her
Jay Shetty just brings so many different amazing people ❤
That's my goal!
Thank you for having Nessa and thank you Nessa hearing you talk about your eating disorder helps me so much, to know that someone know exactly what I'm going through
Blown away by her self awareness and all that she has been through ❤
nessa barret shows that struggles are real in life & with strong willpower we can get through this!
nessa is such a beautiful person inside and out, whenever I listen to her talk I will cry she has such a pure soul
I love this girl with my whole heart and I’m so proud of everything she’s gotten through ❤. Thank you for letting her open up so much and being so graceful and understanding ❤️
i love this sm. i’ve been dealing w anorexia since i was 11 years old ,, it’s nice to have someone speaking up a. the issue without denying it
This truly is a powerful interview. Hope the best for everyone in this world. You are not alone ♥️
What an amazing chat this was. Nessar - you deserve all the happiness in the world for you are a great human being. I wish you much love Jay - perfect as usual
This was actually my favorite podcast episode ever! I love Nessa & everything that you talked about during the interview was so instructive and accurate. Thank you for creating this safe place for her to be able to express herself honestly and help others who are struggling too.
Thank you for opening up nessa 💕 you are literally an inspiration
Nessa is so insightful and wise with her words. I hope to articulate my thoughts gracefully and as fast as she does someday. Everything she says blew my mind with her introspection. Love this interview! New subscriber!
She is such a beautiful person in and out. I am so grateful to have her in my life whether she’s physically in it or not. She has such a strong voice and she’s uses it for good and I don’t see many influencers or artists advocating for it this much. Really enjoyed this podcast♥️♥️
I adore this pod, i come back to it so often. As someone who suffers with an eating disorder who doesnt necessarily ‘look’ like an ed sufferer - i really appreciate nessa talking about how eating disorders dont have a look. You both expressed such empathy and genuine emotion and understanding. I truly loved this episode. Youre both so important and the way and fact that youre even talking about topics like this with such an open mind is so refreshing. 💌
Such a pure heart! She is so young yet still extremely self aware. ❤❤❤
These conversations really help me get through life sometimes, thank you.
Nessa is so incredible. She has such incredible advice and is so real. I love her so much
Wow, she put words to something that I knew was happening or feeling but never knew how to explain. Such a great podcast!
Great interview! I feel like we need a book on the stages of a break-up/ heartbreak, would help so many people. Such a mature lady for her age ❤❤❤
I absolutely love her music. I discovered Nessa through my daughter who is a huge fan of hers and became a huge fan myself. Her music resonates with me. She really is awesome. Can't wait to see what comes next.
This interview by far is one of the best I have ever seen on jays show. She is so intelligent and mature. I do not know who she is however I will be following her and her music from this point on. Prayers going up for you young lady. Best interview. Your parents must be very proud of you.
She may be struggling, as most are, yet her honesty and self-awareness make her an amazing role model. Wishing her full recovery (which i know is a journey) so she can inspire many for decades to come.
you are such a good interviewer. thank you for letting her speak. and not cutting in! great interview
the way that she became more mature and well spoken is beautiful. she’s so down earthy and sincere about her mental health. keep going Nessa 🫶🏻
nessa is truly so amazing!! She has saved so many people in so many ways.
This young lady is absolutely delightful! She is absolutely filled with wisdom and love ❤
I love this, First, you were great i really enjoyed your energy and how you involved the conversation with nessa, u can see that she was really comfortable. And second, she is great not just as an artist but it looks like as a person she is too, i love the fact that she is honest in her process.
Love her energy and heart frfr 🪫💯💎
love her so much! love seeing her being so open on podcasts too🤍
i can relate so much to this podcast. felt so much comfort watching it 🤍
Such a good podcast/interview. You both seem to genuine and real. Both of your voices are so calm and perfect for a podcast as well
I love this podcast the talker is very respectful let’s the other person speaks and listens and is always super kind with his questions and answers ❤
This one made me cry I have a very deep connection to nessas music hearing her talk so openly and the way she is able to process understand and express and turn her struggles into beautiful art is so amazing and inspiring seeing her growth made me so emotional and proud she is such an Angel 😇
I am happy that she is able to ask and get the help at such a young age and doesn’t need to wait a life to learn all these. I hope she breaks the stigma around going to therapy, looking for healing the inner child. ❤
Jay thank you for always being so wonderful and so inspirational. What i love about you is not only are you so knowledgeable and great..the importance and the way you listen to every guest is unbelievable. You are so humble. So thank you ❤❤❤
best podcast i ever watched, Nessa is just so honest and real. she really helps so many people including myself, by talking so open about her struggles with an eating disorder. it really makes me feel so understood
This is such a beautiful episode,very relatable in the present day world! My favourite interview so far❤❤
What a beautiful interview. Nessa is so insightful for her age. Me at 21 could never sit down and have this conversation with myself let alone a interview about trauma and heartbreak. She is growing into herself and it’s beautiful to see.
You’re so strong and so mature at such a young age. You’re beautiful Nessa inside and out. I do listen to and watch Jay’s podcast regularly but I never really felt like I needed to comment but today I have to for you my beautiful angel Nessa. May you be happy and well.
Why haven't i come across your channel sooner? Must be because im going through a breakup and suffering from the ultimate betrayal. I listen to your videos everyday at work my friend. Thank you!
Another purposeful conversation on the podcast this 2023 summer all about family relationships & self love❤🎉Keep up the great work Jay 😊
I love nessa so much. This was an interview I didn’t know I wanted until I clicked on the video.
I love this girl so much and have so much respect for her.
She has grown so much and I’m so proud of her. I hope she does get treatment soon for her E.D, she deserve calmness and peace
she is doing amazing, i wish i was this self awareness. Thank you for sharing your story.
girly keeps giving us interviews i love it
nessa is my favorite person ever i’m so beyond proud of her i love her sm her shows are amazing 🤍🤍🤍🤍
This interview was absolutely amazing! It completely blew my mind! What a beautiful human being ❤
this is definitely the best Interview nessa has ever done. she is so raw and honest and really emotional but in a really good way. I already really liked this podcast and last week's episode with Tom holland was already really good but this one is my new favorite.
Two beautiful humans right there ❤ thank you both! Really touched me in both topics you spoke of today
Love getting to know people intimately like this before actually getting to know what they do. Gives me a very special view point of their personality. Nessa is a beautiful soul. ❤
nessa is amazing. she is so strong. ❤❤
Haven’t been this excited about a guest for a long time! Nessa is a real life angel. She’s so beautiful internally as well as on the outside!
NESSA IS A FREAKING QUEEN!!! i sturgeon with about that same thing as her and he explained things so well
I started crying right from the start because I can relate to Nessa in so many ways. I've known her since the first song, and she's become my fav singer over that time, and a person whose music I'm always waiting for. This interview just made me realise that I love Nessa even more than I thought. Hearing her talking about these things and being so mature makes me admire her so much. Thank you, Nessa, I'm so glad that you and your music came to my life. I will support you always
Thank you for having this kinda conversations,it feels so personal and relatable,watching her speak wisely and just smile and be happy throughout gives me a sense of hope !!People go through tough times but it makes them much more kinder ,wiser and mature towards situations and human beings.The way she said be vocal and honest ,i personally believe its the best help you could ask for !! Take care❤
if you have the opportunity to get your ex back will you get your ex back be honest
what a beautiful, touching and warm interview! x
41:34 jays reaction to that comment was everything. EVERYONE NEEDS SOMEBODY IN THERE LIFE THEY CAN LOVE PERIOD ITS THE VERY REASON WE ARE HERE ON THE PLANET AFTER ALL.
Much needed.... thank you so much jay for the podcast ❤
I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Nessa is so mature ; loved this interview. I am impressed with her outlook in life considering all she has been through 😍😍🥰
I had never heard of her or her music; I have now become a fan.
I love her so much. She’s such a sweet soul
This young woman is amazing. Loved the interview.
i am so proud of her, i hope she knows how loved she really is
I did not know who this was, but what a great interview bringing many topics that are so important. Jay Shetty did an excellent job interviewing her.
Thank you very much!
Having gone through a painful breakup less than a year ago, the way she articulated how I felt about the breakup was amazing.
Her personality and mentality is amazing! I love her!
wow this interview was one of the best i’ve ever watched! i loved every minute.
Love this interview probably one of my favorites
What a beautiful, courageous, honest, raw interview. ❤
Never heard of Nessa until this. Really great to watch
That was amazing! I loved this conversation and I didn’t even know Nessa before ❤
thank u for sharing nessa, u remind me so much of myself. I truly hope you're okay.❤
Loved this interview. She is so wise beyond her years.
I love this interview. I honestly don’t know who this person is. However, I found this exchange very comforting and relatable. It is also incredibly encouraging to see the level of vulnerability being expressed here. Absolutely beautiful. Thank you. I would like to hear you talk more about grief. I’m very curious. You’ve done a book on love. And love plays such an immense role in grief. I wonder what could be gained by learning more about how people move through grief.
nessa gets it, the way she say and worded her problems touchs my soul every time
Nessa, you are an amazing human being! I listen to full podcast and enjoyed every second of it. Thank you both for sharing your wisdom and spreading love.
Oh she's so amazing
I love her so much. She is so strong
This conversation really speaks to me 🙏