Professor Clemmons (aka Evil Mastermind, Nyarlathotep, SCP Director, Vault Overseer, That Guy Who Wants To Take Over The Post-Apocalyptic World, Card Cheat, etc., etc., Ad nauseam) performs a new A.S.M.R. treatment using nothing more than the padded table top from Experiment Room 37 (which is down the hall and to the left from Benjamin) accompanied by a few familiar objects and friends, all to help you relax and get a good night's sleep.
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What is ASMR?
ASMR stands for Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response. It's a non-scientific word that an everyday person came up with to describe the feeling characterized as a pleasurable tingling sensation felt in the head, scalp, back and other regions of the body in response to visual, auditory, tactile, olfactory, and/or cognitive stimuli, such as crinkling bags, hand movements, whispering, personal attention or watching someone perform a task. It's like goosebumps but much more pleasant and without the uncomfortable chills.
ASMR videos are meant to intentionally induce this sensation in the viewer, often referred to as "tingles", but the videos also serve to provide a relaxing, calming and soothing experience for the viewer. Many people who do not experience ASMR still enjoy the videos for their calming and sleepy effect.
1. Actually, I have seen it lately. Do you remember Harold? You know, the former job recruiter? He's now one of prep chefs. I saw him, or rather, one of his alters, with it. They seem to have a severe case of OCD, and they were using your cutting mat to get all of the veggies for the chicken noodle soup the same size. 2. The meaning of life is to know thyself...at least in my humble opinion It's a very subjective question. 3. Oh, omelette du fromage. It's my favorite. 4. Oh yeah. Dr. Corvus gave me a dose during my last treatment session. I did end up sleeping well, but I think my body had an adverse reaction to it. I couldn't stop sweating and all I could stand to do was clutch onto the third story railing outside my room and look down in order to counteract the vertigo. Luckily, the nameless horrors below were...occupied. The Fremen are sturdy folk...there's no doubt about that. 5. No, I haven't. Nurse Manley has been taking to sobriety quite well. He has taken up an odd form of yoga to cope or distract himself. At least, that's what I hear from the other patients. I'm still not his favorite person at the moment. He hasn't gotten over that unflattering poster I put up in the cafeteria two months ago. I don't regret it though. When you go around and say that sweet pickles are better than dill...well, them's fighting words. I happened to fight with a giant posterboard and imagination. 6. Sadly, yes. I've had a lot on my mind lately. 7. A little puzzled, just fine overall. I'm just relieved you used the eraser end this time. 8. Yeah...that. Margaret found me sleepwalking in the hall two days ago. I'm told I was muttering Shadowspeak and trying to grasp at something with both hands. Whatever it was, it was much bigger than me. Apparently I started gasping, like I was being choked. Margaret knocked me over the head with her shovel and I came to. I couldn't stop crying afterwards. It felt like I had been ripped away from someone or something. I just don't know. 9. Anxiety has been getting better. Working in the cafeteria has forced me to face a lot more people. Eye contact still needs some work though. I just have to tell myself to breathe, calm down, and that you're just wiping down tables. They're not judging you every single second, they're eating. They're too preoccupied with what the hell Deep One Dave has cooked this time and if it's digestible. 10. I get along with the other patients much better nowadays. They're very mindful of my anxiety when they visit so they understand if I'm not up for interaction. Thankfully, those days are seldom. I just wish I had more time to get to know them. Our treatment session appointments are all over the map so coordinating meet-ups is tricky. Yes, I had fun with this. Also, frat'cu gy'ulh matreche cadmium yellow! So, so relaxing, E.R. I missed the placid, menace bubbling just below the surface demeanor of the good professor. Awesome work as usual. 😃
So is Uncle E saying stuff in Rh’lyian or is this just smart and well thought out comment. If numero Ichi then I’ll have to add that to my Duolingo and rewatch every E.R. vid again, gonna be hard to stay awake doe.
Anderson Mejia Questions 3 - 5 were asked in R'lyehian so I just wanted to have some fun by answering them in my own way. It's the little things, ya know?
P.S. No one knows what is said in R'lyehian...it's all an eldritch mystery.
ok I belive you, or is that what Clemmons told you to protect the sanitarium.😞😞😞
Anderson Mejia ...Ssh! Do you wanna get buried? There are cameras everywhere! No one can even sneeze without "him" finding out.
The subtle touch of having the game left there you played in the last video is why we love you.
I hope ER never stops making videos and we can learn everything about the Arkham Sanitarium and its residents
Weee wooo weee wooo!!!
Thee Trashman The residence, of the heaven of hells
Woah, hold up, SCP Director? That... That makes a surprising amount of sense.
Yeah he doesn’t want the competition
Nice to see a familiar face once again, even if it is that of Arkham’s resident diabolical professor.
Aka Nyarlthotep, the crawling chaos.
Diabolical? Pff. I know Bill firsthand! Great guy.
I love how you can actually tell you wrote 42 for the meaning of life. Props sir
Woah. The Rush Hour game from the previous video is in the roleplay... The regular "just Paul hanging out" videos are starting to connect with the roleplay videos. *Some meta shit is about to start happening.*
Severo Cairon we are already three layers deep Inception
Severo Cairon not sure if i understand, how can it be meta if there has to be fiction for it to be meta?
Shogo Kun girl what?
Paige Murphy wait, you’re telling me that some of this stuff AINT real????
But uncle E is already the mad ruler of the rift and the sanitarium... After all, he created it It's been meta this whole time
So... The Paul dude playing rush hours is also a resident of Arkham sanitarium...
Daniel Sam Paul is actually uncle e's name but this is totally possible
The amount of work you put into your asmr videos is astounding
AbsoluteMadlad wha... but...
You know, you have been trying a lot of new characters and ideas lately and that's awesome... But man has it been a while since Batman painted my face!
David
Pink Horizon no I meant face my taint
I love this whisper/soft spoken voice it is so soothing and relaxing
He protec He attac But most importantly A chair is what he laccs
ToxicSkull0 I'm worried about his knees 😰
His *K n e e s*
the clipboard/writing always get me on anything keep it up Rift
I stumbled onto Your channel I listen to asmr videos nightly to help me with severe anxiety As soon as I heard your voice, a calm came over me Subscribed!
Congratulations on reaching five hundred thousand subscribers rift! Can't wait to see what comes next from you.
The Padded Table Top is nice, but what about; Padded clipboards? Padded glasses? Padded Inflatable anchors? Padded Black highlighters? Padded Powdered water? Though the Padded Table Tops does most of the work so I can't complain anyways.
No. Good thinking! You deserve a padded room...
Padded Uncle E
No. Insert padded bras joke
Padded steel beams
Why do I always see you in videos
Had a long day at work and I'm so tired, I'm so glad I get to go to sleep to this right now
Your environment you create is always so relaxing. Thank you again dad.
InstantASMR he's not our dad, he's our uncle
uncle dad
Awesome! You are a true genius. You have always been so creative it amazes me. Keep up the great work Paul.
Davros , the creator of the daleks
When?
50 minutes of pure relaxation👌 thanks uncle E
that pencil sound was amazing for me . tingles after a long time. thank you.
Thank you for the easy nights of sleep for these past few years
I couldn't help but notice how nice your nails are in this video, that shine!
This is such a nice sound ❤️❤️ Nap time at 9am
That tapping sound is heaven!
This is my 3rd time watching and still can’t stay awake
dat tapping. thats something else!! long time ago i experienced tingles
The tingles from this video are out of this world!
your voice when you talk like this really relaxing and gives me tingling 👍🌝
I’m in love with all of your videos 😍
Aw, c'mon Rift, I thought you were more subtle than that description ;)
Severo Cairon Yeah you’re right. I shoulda left out Card Cheat.
Ephemeral Rift I think the biggest spoiler was that you revealed he is secretly Ad Nauseam.
There are no mistakes, only happy accidents. I love you Rift, thanks for putting me to sleep almost daily
This video is very underrated. I come back again and again to this specific one and skip about halfway into it.
Either Papa Rift is the most creative man alive... or he is the single most highly-functioning sociopath split-personality mental case in history.
Nice and _tingly._
Prof. Clemmons VS Prof. Tinglebottom
I don't know exactly why, but I preferred the mic setting and sound of the table tapping in the rush hour level 40 video to this one. Less sticky sounds. Still one of the best videos you've made.
Omg was that a 4th wall break at the beginning? When the professor was about to say the title, and then he says “how did you know” when we said it Obviously when he asked us how we knew we must’ve said “it was the title of the video”!
Question 3 gave me insane tingles
I am here to praise the one and only true Lord and Saviour, Papa Rift. Praise be. Stay blessed. Peace be with you.
Ralph Wiggum amen !👏
👏2⃣👌💃
Preach!
What happens if a god is an atheist? =l
xXmegagallade Haha, you’re so silly.
7:32 “what is the meaning of life” you can hear him write 42
2 RUSH HOUR VIDEOS IN THE SAME WEEK. FUCK YEAH!!!
This is just what my headache needs. Thank you!!
I’ve developed a theory that the reason why everyone looks the same is that the humans in the rift universe mass clone a body, and then perform brain transplants when they need a new one, as they have talked about brain transplants multiple times during sessions.
I cannot help but consider this as a possibility, and your very credible and informative content such as,” I upload hentai here”, and “Jeff busts a nut”. Only strengthen my belief that this indeed possible
I regret to say that I have messed up my reply to the first comment, as I forgot to include the word “is” in the final sentence . I apologize for this
Good point
I’m inclined to BELIEVE THAT YOU ARE THE CURE FOR INSOMNIA!!! 😴😴😴😴 Thanks you for sharing your gift with us all!!!!
You deserve more subscribers
I would know about the lore of Rift world but I fall asleep every time
Half a million strong ! Rifters unite!
Damn, your cave has EVERYTHING.
My OCD struggles with the glasses being crooked on his left side. Besides that great video!
It was an *honour* to pass this treatment !
The professor looks somehow adorable like this, sitting with a table at collarbone height. Makes him look small and cute I guess.
Bite sized.
Never trust the professor.
Never................
The only thing I can trust is the tin foil hat society.
SCP director? Is it happening?! Is it finally happening?!
Maólmhuire Scott I love your profile pic, my friend.
Perfect time for a nap 😴
Samantha Mackman always a perfect time for a hcvgx hc
Perfect spot for a Mirelurk den
I guess the inventory dude knows about the cutting mat, and also the tradesman's list...
Clemmons!!!! I knew he was back!☺ i wonder if he sometimes hangs out with benjamin ? Maybe talk about life with a cold beer 👍
Another great vid
I came to this channel for relaxation, but now I'm fully invested in Arkham Sanitarium lore. I wonder if there's a wiki...
Do more with this table please
the subtleness of hik having an actual libe fuckin grenande is unreal
Hey I thought about a good video idea for the locksmith videos....instead of a combo you should have A LOT of keys to try and figure out which one works.
That pencil sound for meaning of life. 42 xD too short to be anything else.
Congrats on 500k
Easy Playz ye boi... half a mil
Finally
Thanks I appreciate your continued support
Did no one else notice that he just pulled out a Grenade out of nowhere 🤣love the same though keep it up 💪🏻
youre a fucking genius mate.
The evil mastermind returns
This video is going to be epic,I already know 😊😍💖
I can totally see some ASMREU type stuff going on here
Holy shit, it's professor Clemmons!!!
Whenever he said "I'll be with you in just a moment" I thought he was gonna yeet all that stuff off of the table
damn... this video actually brought back the tingles. long time viewer says hello i hope u r well
*lashes at you* Come here pigeon!!!!!
pigeon, shit!
*Pulls out shotgun and fires emedietly*
이분 첫구독했을때 당시는 21만 구독자였는데, 이젠 50만이구먼.,,ㅠ멋지다
apada muses 오우 반가워여
I'm pretty sure you are some kind of Eldridge abomination and I'm loving it
Doctor clemmons unmasked
I know for a fact he wrote 42 as the meaning of life and I love it
When I watched the rush hour vids I didnt sleep I tried to solve it
What if in the “regular” asmr videos we are watching a patients video on an Arkham Sanatarium version of KZhead
🤔
"And your carapace" Me: *procedes to crab dance* "Your Beatle carapace* Me: ah yeah i love shit i forgot
HOLY SHIT THE PLAGUE DOCTOR TOOK OFF THE MASK!
I bet the professor can help rift out with the lv 40 card in rush hour
Uploaded exactly at midnight
Milton wants his stapler back.
more benjamin ples
Love u rift 💖
Mate you knocked me out like Anthony Joshua - look forward to bedtimes.
i love asmr
Please team up with Warner Bros and produce an ASMR feature film. Thx.
Justin he does deserve something the storytelling the acting the costumes characters the helping with the. zzz
Well, many of his videos have almost movie length so we're already close.
Justin so if people fell asleep during the movie, would it from boredom or relaxation? xD
I read these comments and I’m surprised no one has mention the fact that he put a Grenade on the table and was tapping on it.
wait a minute, is rift part of the 0-5 command?
Bob Ross funko pop hahahaha!
Your mic could catch an atom moving a milimeter from across another timeline.
So random theory, do you think that we’re just supposed to pretend that people look different, or is it cannon that most people look like the professor, at least to us, other than a countable number of exceptions such as Dave and Al Heimer people look very similar to the professor. Or this might just be me digging for lore on this world where there isn’t any. Ah well, back to the treatment.
hayden basick Yes!
A common theory is that the only real person we interact with is The Professor, and the rest of the characters are just figments of our imagination created due to the Professor’s treatments and our isolation from anyone else. It could also simply be because he’s one man playing several people for his KZhead channel and it would be unnecessarily expensive to hire other actors for something he does so well already. =D
Didn’t realize it was already a thing, and I agree that he does it really well, thanks for the info though XD
Did i hear right? Did you just say: "Can you say aaaa.. Fangs.." ?
I wonder if he has a whole manuscript of lore written out somewhere that he views over before he does his videos.
Sooo uncle rift is an outer god (Nyarlathotep) dope
Alternate title: Bob Ross Summons a Demon
Professor: what Is the meaning of life? Me: 42 Professor: *writes down 42* Me: *freaks out*
The only Rift World character powerful enough to stop Professor Clemmons is Meatball Jeff.