Jimmy Carr: Telling Jokes (2009) - FULL LIVE SHOW
Jimmy Carr, the hardest-working man in comedy returns with his most controversial stand-up show to date, Telling Jokes.
Slick, sick and definitely not for the easily offended, Jimmy offers a masterclass in comedy as he takes his dry and sardonic wit to a whole new level. And it seems that no-one and nothing is safe from Jimmy’s cutting remarks as he delves into a diverse range of subjects including religion, sex, bullying and (somewhat ironically) political correctness …
Welcome to Jimmy Carr's official KZhead channel, where you can find all the best bits from his stand-up comedy shows, TV appearances, podcasts, and more!
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With all of his sex jokes I laugh imagining Jimmy actually having sex. Does he perform while performing? How could he not think of his own jokes mid coitus? Plz make another America tour, believe it or not we need you.
Jimmy . Most popular sex position is from Star Wars : Han(d) Solo :P
p
you
hello
At the end when he said, "Thank you so much for buying the DVD if you're watching this at home", I felt a little guilty for a moment, watching it on KZhead. Then I remembered, it's his channel, he put it here. So thank *you* Jimmy Carr.
I bet you felt nearly as guilty as old Jimmy as he defrauded the country of millions in tax. Luckily tax doesn't go toward the NHS and saving the lives of sick children..... Does it?
Laughs in pirate
@@nathanielpea5819 Yeah... Let's not overdramatize absolutely everything now...... Shall we?
@@nathanielpea5819 he probably still pay more in tax every year than you do in a lifetime
"You wouldn't steal a car, you wouldn't steal a tv, you wouldn't watch a youtube video..."
Very funny. So wonderful to have stand up comedians to soften the harshness of life. Thank you
Pure talent where after all these years, the jokes still hit hard.
Just like my dad.
@@sanne3465 always a classic
"Revenge is icecream" was actually an adorable joke
A nice change of pace
This is my absolute most favorite show! That soup guy, Tracy and all other audience interactions elevated it above all others.
Yupp, but I really hope they both hooked up though! That would make this entire show so wholesome!
@@nikil428 Wondering the size of the queue though....
"Like a bulldog eating mayonaise" xD
And the very last jokes are pure fucking gold :D
"Its gonna be a bit like throwing a sausage up an allyway" 🤣🤣
That’s cool. Just means I’ll last longer 😄
@@dr.floridamanphd true 😆
Like fucking a bucket of water
What a wingman, sorted a date by accident during a show 😂
Appreciate these full shows for free cheers Jimmy
Because he doesnt make enought money from doing them live woth Corona. And he kinda sucks. He will never be Lee Evans. Insulting people isnt funny. Its just Pathethic.
@@inceneration lol. The orony is your insulting him. 🤣
@@inceneration he is funny, stfu ur not a comedy police.
@@inceneration Lee Evans is overrated .. and has retired as a comic .... few years ago
"Free" 🤣🤣 a wannabe stand up comic right here. The cost is not financial.
Thank you Jimmy. These shows make my day, everyday. 🇲🇻
My goodness the thumbnail for the video, Halloween is over Jimmy!
Omfg lmao
Not with that face it isn't.
that’s how he looks with no make up🤣
@@danstanciu9549 Ohio. I o o Ohio to
True it is but in fairness Jimmy always looks creepy-scary.... hanging around schools with his white van.
The thumbnail is certainly giving me a nightmare fuel. Thank you Jimmy Carr for laughs and creeps
It's always scary when you don't know where the ventriloquist is
All
Ok, now I need to watch all his videos. Absolutely f****** brilliant!!
After that guy said "She was easy", She Should have said " you haven't got any yet!!" hahahaha
Jimmy, you always manage to cheer me up, thanks for releasing your shows on here, you're awesome bro. =)
I dont think "bro" was the correct term lmao 🤣
I like how Mark's date is just happily watching him be put in the spotlight by Jimmy.
Dwarf shortage jokes! You can't get much lower than that can you??
A dwarf wearing eyeglasses is a short-sighted short for short.
well that was an OVERsight wow im hilarious
Getting a bit too big for your boots
It'd be a tall order....
"Czechs not accepted" deserved a better response.
America couldn’t handle this guy even if he went bare minimum.
He made a "Live in NY" show 2005. Its on youtube.... Its cringy cos you can tell he's holding back and that ruins the show completely.
We actually want him to come here and come full Force Problem is to many fucking snowflakes
Already happened
I hope Steve's and Tracy's children are doing fine...
I wonder if they ever hooked up.
Didnt work out, it was indeed like throwing a sausage up an allyway 🤣
No man should tell dad jokes, but Jimmy Carr does it well
This is so tasteless. And brilliantly executed, hilarious, and so well performed. Kudos!
he really is a fucking legend,these comeback are faster than the speed of light
If I want my comeback, I have to get it from your mum.
“Looked like someone’s shadow got up and fucked off”
Funny man, he makes me laugh for days.
Try remembering the jokes. Teehee
I'll admit I'll laugh for seconds up to a minute, but days? That sounds like a condition Mr. Collins.
@@Seldomane That was more of a general statement of all his material, he is funny and witty.
Big thank you from Brazil! What is the best place to keep up with your content? Best comedian ever, not even jokin.. xD
What a goddamn legend of comedy
brilliant comedian and amazing crowd are best to complement each other.
Thanks for the upload Jimmy! A lot of us need a laugh these days
Keep on doing what you do so brilliantly Jimmy. 👏👌🤣
found about your shows about a year ago. you have enriched my life jimmy :)
Fk me you're late😂😂😂
"whats your name?" Tracy... "Ofc it fucking is" :D : D :D
Thank you !
"I'm jokin' I never pay" - we know, Jimmy, we know... 😆😆😆
when you're on a stage being paid to tell offensive jokes it's the funniest thing ever but when you tell offensive jokes and don't get paid for it, suddenly you've gone too far.
I love the bit where Jimmy plays matchmaker.
Jimmy, love your humor. Found these from the 8 out of 10 cats series videos.
Omg a 13 year old at this show…..🥴 Love you Jimmy! You're THE BEST!
Jimmy, you are undoubtedly the King of adult humor with some class, if that's possible, and your crowd work is masterful. Please come to the USA sometime soon, I'm 65. The sooner the better!
Keep him please.
Ok, at first I was a little put off but this guy is awesome 😂
Why are you gay
Yeah the child jokes can be a bit much, especially how trafficking has been exposed the last few years, but hey if we don't laugh about it
FINALLY NEW STUFFZ! 🤙🎉🥳
I like how people are so offended that he said vaccines don’t suck.
How would he know? The only fact is that the vaccinated can still spread, so what's the big deal about personal choice?
The gov also tell us to pay taxes.. Funny how its ok for Jim lad to pick n choose gov rules to follow..
V people are more likely to die of Covid than non V people. Check week 48 report from UKHSA.
@@PaulGillooly1 that does not mention mortality only percentages of who are and are not vaccinated. And that only states that unvaccinated people are more likely to have it. Could you link your source.
@@PaulGillooly1 actually it says that unvaxxed people are more likely to end up in intensive care.
I didn't know Roger Federer is such a good comedian.
I was wondering why these people are dressed like everybody used to dress back in the 2000s... Then I read the title. Such nostalgia.
Thank you
Thumbnail looks like a Sims 3 character
Without a doubt your best special.
love this guy!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He's on the top of my list of .....well......He's on top.....
What are you studying? My response: Your mom
Brilliant vid thank you Jimmy ❤❤😂😂
Wonderful
amazing
bloody brilliant! i liked the spitting image puppet at the end telling us to like and subscribe
Great Show indeed!
2009... God, how I miss those simple times.
This will be fun to see.
Jimmy is such a legend
Love Tracy lollll
Thanks for this upload daddy
Woot! Thanks Jimmy. When this Covid makes it possible, I'll come to the UK from Denmark to watch you with my daughter (a show, not watching you "get" with my daughter.
Whuhan flu has nothing to do with it, it's government control
Wow, you are incredibly creepy.
@@travisbrunner2922 That's the point: Right up Jimmy's alley.
@@travisbrunner2922 perhaps incredibly truthful. Didn't Knee Chi say that you can tell a lot about a person by the amount of truth they can accept
This is creepy on so many different levels. Stay in Denmark.
I love this man I swear
Yessss
About a copper coil. In the 90's there was a scrap metal rush in former Soviet states. People were burning coils of cable in a fire to get the copper(or aluminium) for scrapyards. Some people went missing these days...
Brilliant
That thumbnail photo of his face is mildly terrifying
God Bless mr. carr.
Never watched this guy before, 40 minutes in and his sharing the n1 spot in my heart(and bum) with Luis ck
... Just post in native language an let google translate :D
Brilliant!
Why are you gay?
(Men) "Have a word for the silent treatment, it's called silence" Thank you for saying it cause when I do I tend to be slapped
Revenge is ice cream - I like this.
50:50 is just perfect 😂
Slappy can write a helluva joke.
Fantastic guy.
I hope Steve and Tracy are still together!
If Steve and Tracie worked out, what an amazing “how we met” story lol
They most likely just fucked once and called it a day
My birth year hits just right
19:14 40:07
This was a great routine, thank you Mate
now im wondering if steve and tracy ever hooked up
And what flavour soup Tracy likes.
Teach a man fish lol 😆 😂
Wow!!! A Jimmy Carr show……uncensored!!
"Anti-theist" I like that.
he is a total menace 😂😂
I need to know if Steven and Tracy ever got together.
I wonder if Steve and Tracey got together after the show…?
Did Steve and Tracey ever get together?
Thanks for posting this. I Needed the laugh.
Great audience
Yes, the ones left, after he had to throw people out. You know, the people with a spine.
50:56 best joke. The delivery is just perfect.
Great suits he always wear.
So...did Steve and Tracy ever hook up? Love this stuff, Jimmy!
Jimmy Carr proudly sponsored by Astra Zenica
I HAVE SEEN FUNNIER BULLET HOLES TO THE HEAD give ya self a slap
@@gordonthompson8634 he IS funny, you're not Gordon.
@@malthus101 got em
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It would be nice to hear the comments from the crowd
The gay Jesus joke was brilliant… 🤣🙏
Genious!
*Genius
@@jamesanderson6373 if you are English, but not if you are Italian, genio. ;)
Thank You Jimmy for this full show. 😍🤩
Jimmy care when his roasting people sounds like a younger Gordon Ramsay
Jimmy love ya, love yer shows, yes i'm from the US, so don't hold it against me :P
It's very Jimmy to pay for stage props he could later turn into a glitzy bathroom 😁
Not sure who we got to turn the lights on in Stoke this year....
Probably who ever paid the power bill last, oh wait I forget you're in Stoke.. 😂