Will The Delta Variant Send Americans Back Into Lockdown?
An alarming rise in covid-19 infections led Los Angeles to reinstate indoor mask mandates, prompting people nationwide to wonder if their state or city could be next. #Colbert #Comedy #Monologue
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The Late Show with Stephen Colbert is the premier late night talk show on CBS, airing at 11:35pm EST, streaming online via Paramount+, and delivered to the International Space Station on a USB drive taped to a weather balloon. Every night, viewers can expect: Comedy, humor, funny moments, witty interviews, celebrities, famous people, movie stars, bits, humorous celebrities doing bits, funny celebs, big group photos of every star from Hollywood, even the reclusive ones, plus also jokes.
As an American, I wonder how infuriating it is for other countries to look at us throwing away our chance with our vaccines when they don't even have vaccines yet.
Has an American, I like turtles.
I can confirm that it really is.
From what I've heard from Canadian streamers...it sucks. I can only imagine other countries feel the same way.
Greetings from Poland, where it's incomprehensible that Americans won't take the shot.
Totally agree. In so very many ways I cannot relate to being an American - it's an embarrassing country at times.
Everybody, especially the unvaccinated, are acting like the nightmare is over. If this is a horror movie, this is the part where everybody thought the killer is dead before going to inspect the body, only to discover that the body's missing and the killer burst out of the floorboards to stab Jethro in the duck.
I use to think horror movies are too dumb to exist in reality but this reality shows me otherwise.
@@ironfox4990 Reality is too dumb to exist in a horror movie.
At what point do we get back to normal? What if covid never goes away, even with vaccines?
The fourth wave is in progress.
You don’t wanna get stabbed in the duck!
Delta Airlines: I wish they would name it something else! Corona Beer: Welcome to the party pal!
kzhead.info/sun/aNGmm5aoZ6Cmg68/bejne.html .
As a retired Delta F/A - I agree!
Well if you get a US variant that goes south you could even it up by calling it the Pan-American variant.
I remember when this all first started and my mormon relatives called me out for having corona in the fridge because that's what they believed was the cause. This was before they thought it wasn't real...
You must know that the vaccine leaflets clearly state that it is a randomized, double-blind study, which means that it is a study where the nurse who dispenses the vaccines does not know if what is being given is an authentic vaccine or a simple placebo. Which proves that it is an EXPERIMENTAL vaccine.
Stephen never fails to make me LOL!! The "massive dick" joke had me LMAO!! Bravo, Stephen!!
The moment I heard about the 70 percent re-rise in cases.. my brain went: "DOES IT EVER STOP!?"
almost all new cases are from people who didn't get vaccinated
Yes, when people stop being stupid tools. So basically no it never stops.
@@malcolmxxx86 From cdc.gov “As of May 1, 2021, CDC transitioned from monitoring all reported vaccine breakthrough cases to focus on identifying and investigating only hospitalized or fatal cases due to any cause.” So now it’s impossible to know how many breakthrough cases are occurring - only hospitalizations and deaths.
@@kellinpatler Yup. But we can look to what's happening in Israel & the UK & know it's likely the same here.
@@gateauxq4604 It has gone from a Pandemic to an Endemic.
The government makes me wear a seat belt when I drive my car. I have never been in an accident. Nobody in my family has been in an accident causing serious injury. Therefore, seat belts are an unconstitutional restraint on my God given right to pursue happiness and freedom! See how fun (and utterly dopey) this game can be when it comes to freedom? Idiots.
They even make me buy insurance too 😭
Stop signs and stop lights are another story too! I have never been hurt or in an accident whenever I have run stop signs or red lights to they are an infringement on my freedom too!
A more apt comparison is being forced to wear a seatbelt when you're sitting in a parked car with the engine off in the middle of nowhere.
@@derekarmstrong3590 That would be an apt comparison if the masks were ordered to be worn at home by oneself…
kzhead.info/sun/aNGmm5aoZ6Cmg68/bejne.html ....
i really missed the piano when Stephen puts something off screen.
Considering how high rent prices are, especially for those who are disabled, that's not okay to shame someone for living with a parent. Yes, he may make enough money but not know how to cook or fold laundry, but for many it's simply a matter of money.
@Juan Blanco doubtful prices aren't ever gonna drop it's no longer about supply and demand it's about profit and people need to pay it which is why it's never gonna Lower because it's something that's needed to do that's Americas problem is we take things that aren't optional and add a huge price tag to it insulin housing food heat just some examples
@Juan Blanco prices aren’t going to drop due to Fed policy
@@SoulshadeVr101 it’s never going to drop because the Federal Reserve is creating money and pumping into economy. That money is causing prices to rise, but also bubbles like in 2008, except everywhere. They keep interest rates low so gov can “pay” off their debt, but gov keeps spending MORE money it doesn’t have.
@@SoulshadeVr101 economic law: over time things get cheaper and higher quality. If prices go up, it’s due to tinkering from outside forces (government)
@@KevinKamto that is absolute bullshit. Capitalism: you press out as much as you can from everyone - else you do it wrong. Thats why prices go up. The democrats have gone right wing and the right wingers rule since the 80ties, so there is no government forces making your prices go up. The US has hardly any state anymore. You people never seem to learn anything.
"... but good news, Nathan, if they convict you, you get your own place." 😂🔥
& Jon so quick with the jailhouse rock 😎🤣
😂😂👍
His new roommate can help him with that virginity problem.
@@juliancrooks3031 Ouch!
#JailHouseRock by Elvis.
When I first heard the story about the Olympic beds, I was wondering how many people actually think a bed is necessary for sex. I'm not even an athlete or particularly flexible, but where there's a will, there is always a way.
If the athletes in Tokyo do have sex together then at least they will have one person watching their performance seeing as there won't be any fans.
True, where there's a will, there's a floor
Surely you mean where there’s a willy there’s a way
Where theres a will theres a lay.
Yes but be careful with your knees.
Really feel like "Life, Liberty, and pursuit of Hashiness" was a missed opportunity
It was over by the end of the 70's.
kzhead.info/sun/Z9B9o8mPa6Orlnk/bejne.html&ab_channel=JulieBrown
Jon Batiste starting to play "Still D.R.E" at 11:52 was genius
Everyone knew it would be back. Too many selfish ignorant humans. This is the last round. Enjoy!
At Thousands of Dollars per Shot from the Government it will never be over, because Politicians like Lobbyist money more than they like the Citizens they refuse to represent.
I love how foreigners (even from the EU) are still forbidden to enter the country so it’s all traveling Americans who bring the delta variant back to the states. 😂😂😂
Fun fact-the CDC never officially determined that the pandemic in the US was over. I have no idea why they announced everyone could run out without masks on when we still had so many ding dongs running around without intentions to ever get vaccinated.
Not necessarily the last. There will still be a few unvaccinated MAGAS to harvest in the fifth wave.
@@gateauxq4604 well. We were basically fed up with being stuck at home for so long. Plus...the economy needed a boost. IDK what to believe anymore though....even after all this started, only 1 person out of everyone I know got covid. I'm traveling either way. I got my shot. I'll wear a mask if I have to.
Even the sidewalk didn't want to host Matt and MTG... Open the Prison Gaetz! Roll out the Welcome Matt!
As an American I'm just wondering when decent movie will come out.
It’s Qaetz. Captain Snow Qaetz. Okay better than rape drugs but…somehow #sad this clicheeee
@@wf6951 did you watch Tenet? That's how far behind I am in the good film department. Lol. I feel you though partna.
I hope you saw the clip of those two and the guy dressed in flag gear before he was hauled off camera.
@@jacobsims8307 We basically stopped getting decent movies when corporate bean counters started making all the decisions and not directors and script writers.
As someone who is a “Mormon” (a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints), the Moroni cosplayer is definitely an embarrassment to most of us 🤦♀️
Quite a Moroni wasn’t he!😂😂😂😎
Why has no one corrected his pronunciation of Moroni? It is not like macaroni... ha ha 😎
@Tito Tim Travels I cringed so hard 😅🥲
“…right in my Blarney Stones…” 😂😂😂
😂😁😄
A little too painful for my taste but, as long as he is fine with it 😂
@@ScarySkele Right? I’m open to exploring. 😉😈😇
@@winter_s_44 I have my limits but, am kinky as Hell to tell you the truth 😈. We all have to explore now and then however not something I would look into 😂
@@ScarySkele Finding myself more and more open to exploring kink myself. Maybe it comes with age. 🤷🏾♀️ But we all have our limits. 😁
John Baptiste and his piano accents whenever Stephen reaches off-camera... *Chefs Kiss*
Hate the audience and hate the woo girls and their yapping the loudest for the cameras. Only thing I missed is John. He just can't have the same effect when he isn't in the room
Just out of respect to the man, musical genius, and living legend, I'm duty bound to correct your spelling, his name is Jon Batiste. I'm only pointing this out because I want you to have an easier time finding his wonderful music, which I highly recommend. Not correcting simply to be pedantic.
@@cleverusername9369 I totally wondered that but assumed I was just thinking of Jon Stewart. Thx for the correction
@@cleverusername9369 Thanks. I honestly thought it was spelled with a "P". Now I know. And, yes, it does help with searching the beautiful music this band puts out. 😊
during that joke about the insurrectionist who lives with his mom getting his own place after being convicted... Jon Batiste played the intro to Jailhouse Rock!!! that was hilarious!
I have been in bed for 2 weeks. My local hospitals are full. I cough every 2-3 minutes and have to spit in a cup. I was vaccinated too. This new strain is no joke! KZhead and internet have kept me sane. There is not enough ramen and soup for this. My roommate won’t even talk to me through a door. This delta variant is rough
Oh gosh I hope you get better soon! Im fully vaccinated as well but Im going back to being alot more careful...youre right this new strain is no joke.
You guys are freaking me out. Hahaha. Knock it off. Everything is totally fine... 😬
Greetings from Poland, D G. We're rooting for you!
Well, you don't HAvE to spit in a cup.
@@tonib.3016 Same here. Gotta be careful.
"Olympic Sex Bed" sounds like the name of an early 90s experimental band. ("Yeah man, we even got Steve Fisk to do the engineering when we go to record!")
😂😄😁
Plus size gladiator filming insurrection for his mommy…priceless
Colbert is on fire tonight. I died with the gladiator guy who lives with his mom. “Good news if they convict you, your getting your own place”. Lol 😂
He was dressed up as a character from the book of moron..I mean mormon
kzhead.info/sun/aNGmm5aoZ6Cmg68/bejne.html ..
His🔥#olympicmagic was spot on😆 #intheairtonight🎼🎶 #HoldOn🎵 !!! Loved the four🛌🏽🏃🏾♂️🙆♀️😁•Intro #fab🥇#bravo💐
I have been fully vaccinated, but I still wear my mask inside stores, etc. Why? I just don’t want to take the chance…
sensible, me too
Over here (Poland), masks have become the new wrist decoration. Wearing them as a bracelet makes them easily accessible for when you get on the bus or go in the store.
Good! You’re also protecting others. I wish everyone did that.
Thank you. And if you did get it, it probably wouldn't kill you.
You have a better chance of dying in an accident on the way to the store than getting or transmitting covid after the vax
8:44 - the irony of the bottom statement is incredible.
I'd almost say the COVID-19 lockdown was a good thing: something happened to Stephen while he was denied a live audience that's left him a better performer. He's freer somehow. I love it!!!
The thing I like most about Colbert in quarantine was how he never tried to make people laugh/waited for applause. Also, we miss Evie’s laughter- real laughter :/
I miss the quarantine style show too
Me too
@@BloodRavenxxx of course you shut ins do
@@johnnygrey840 f off his style was different in lockdown
Evie should be with him.
Wow Nathan is in big trouble. He could be locked up for a few months on top of being grounded.
At least he won't be a virgin anymore. His roomie will see to tjat
@@juliancrooks3031 *Big Bubba Intensifies*
He wont be able to go to camp in the woods with his circle jerking troop this summer. Aww..schucks..
kzhead.info/sun/aNGmm5aoZ6Cmg68/bejne.html ..
As a former mormon, that Moroni joke is hilarious.
"Homicidal mother goose", shit, now I can't unsee it.
😂😂😂😄😄😄
"Why did they leave this seat open for 30 minutes and then put a broom with googly eyes on it?"
Yes cuz people are dropping their guard too soon. Thinking they are safe. Nope still breakout delta variant.
agree!
I just really can't believe how stupid people are. For Christ sake, everyone who's telling these idiots not to take precautions ARE TAKING PRECAUTIONS!
I hadn't stopped social distancing or mask wearing, despite numbers having been down in my state. Why? Because travel is open and I keep hearing about cases in other states. Also because I'm an introvert and I'm pretty much always social distancing.
Even though I'm fully vaccinated, I'm still wearing a mask, to protect myself from the idiots who haven't got the shot. BTW I live in Florida, DeIdiot is great. 🧏♂️🤪😜🤷♀️
@@jeffccan4464 yep, delta variant is awful, maybe less lethal but who wants a lung replacement or tinnitus?
You know, it was somewhere in the middle of all the talk about Olympian sex beds that I realized how much I love that the monologue doesn't have to focus on the president lying about major issues the entire time. For every day. For months. God, I don't miss former president Douchebag Trashfire, or whatever his name was.
If we go into lockdown again, can we watch Stephen do his show by himself again? I loved it.
We won't go into lockdown again. The American people won't allow it. There could be a million cases a day, and we won't go into lockdown. 72% of adults have at least one dose of vaccine, once that number reaches 80% I would hope that there's some herd immunity.
It seems to me that the COVID rebound can't be unexpected by anyone who understands even the basics of viral spread. Uh huh.
Y'know, there are so many reasons to make fun of those insurrectionists. So very, very many reasons. But I especially hate how they invite the "living with their parents" line of mockery. Because lots of folks live with their parents nowadays. It's increasingly common, especially outside of America, and even more so because of the pandemic. Does it really have to be such a sticking point? I live with my parents too. They're elderly, and I need to take care of them. They've had four major surgeries in the last three years, and someone had to help them get by. I've spent months on end rehabilitating and comforting them. We don't want to spend money on caretakers, the pandemic sure didn't help, and neither of them wants to get sent to a home. We can't afford another house, they're already divorced and living separately, and I gotta cross the river all the time just to touch bases. So here I am, working every day to try to make them both comfortable in their golden years and keep the family running, and then I hear about how another one of these buffoons who stormed the Capitol lives with their parents. The jokes begin, the laughter rises, and I feel the sting of embarrassment. And I don't blame Stephen, I love the guy, but man, can't we skip the "lives with his momma" jokes? Can we just agree that it doesn't necessarily have to be a mark of shame by itself? I hate feeling like a loser every time this comes up. And I bet I'm not alone. Again, I don't blame Stephen. But lord, after all the emotional and physical stress of caring for elderly relatives, I can't stand the idea that I could be compared to those twits who farted in America's face back in January. If nothing else, I think I've at least earned more than that.
I think it's just the caricature of a lazy grown man living with their patents being some sort of leech. There's obviously different contexts to people living with their patents, and yours clearly isn't one to be mocked
@Damien Vryce we live with my dad by choice. We could afford an apartment, but why pay $1600+/month for rent when my dad lives alone in a large 4 BR house with a paid off mortgage? We all go in equally on bills, so it saves all of us money, as it's split 3 ways, and my dad (who can't cook) gets LOTS of delicious homemade meals. I am his only child, and I know eventually I will **need** to live here to help him, but the idea that the only acceptable reason for living with parents is due to disability or inability to care for oneself, etc, is also dumb. Western civilization's obsession with families living alone is ridiculous. My dad gets to see his 6 yo granddaughter DAILY, and we all have a great time together. IMO, it's wonderful.
Definitely not alone. I had but a brief stint alone but when I wanted to save money to travel to Europe I went back home. Afterwards, my mother took ill and I've been with her ever since. Cooking, medicines, chores and errands. No shame in caring for and loving your own parents. I KNOW they don't mean it to me but so many others cast me aside when I mention I live with my mother. Eh, their problem. I also do not like or care for physical look jokes, personally. Do not mention anything about a persons appearance and expect me to laugh. Pun me all day long and I'll cackle.
@@Balletified Yeah, but it's a joke I've heard a thousand times, and it gets under my skin. Past a certain point you feel like you just gotta speak up, y'know? 'Cause if I feel that way then other people probably do too, and it's not a bad thing to complain a little when you feel like the butt of someone else's joke again and again.
Joe, you sound like a stand-up guy. I wish I could buy you a beer.
It's good that the bed didn't break when he jumped on it. Can you imagine if he'd tested it by jumping, it broke, and he fell and hurt himself and couldn't participate in the Olympics? For years afterward, he'd find himself explaining to people that he couldn't participate in the Olympics, and people would ask if it was the coronavirus or a training accident, and he'd have to say, no, he got hurt breaking the anti-sex bed, just trying to see if it was possible.
440lbs? Me and my partner wouldn't crack that, and we are decidedly not in, shall we say, Olympic shape. How hard are these folks assumed to be nailin' each other?
@@Taurusus the average olympian is around 155 lbs, so two might be around 310 lbs. that would be the force exhibited down on the bed by gravity. the, uh, activity would need to produce an additional 130 lbs of force in the same direction. any horizontal force wouldn't contribute to breaking the bed; only the vertical component would count.
As long as he doesn’t specify that he was jumping, that actually sounds like an awesome reason :)
That would be a story worth having, 100%
@@Taurusus LOL XD Your response is the funniest thing on this whole video!!!! Thank you for cheering me up.
So much ignorance in this country, embarrassing . Still wish I was Canadian
no you don't
There is always Woo han China. If you han want to move.
@@barrybarney6085 screw your republican views and opinions.
No you don't we are Communist
I identify as Canadian. Eh / eh / eh
I hope so. I was loving being in lock down, the peace and quiet here in NYC, and working from home
It was pretty cool seeing all the small business owners lose everything seeing record breaking suicide numbers and sky high addiction rates wasn't it?
NO! I am not going back to that!!
Bless that man for wearing a mask to avoid infecting that broom.
Dayum. Colbert is looking good in that suit!
Anyone can look with a black suit and white shirt
Gin Tonic is tasting good on my girls skin when she wears Burberry.
@@dan_38 then I need to buy like six.
Needs more teenage mutant Ninja turtles.
I don't remember ever seeing him in a black suit before.
Batiste playing intro to Jailhouse Rock was such a good on-the-fly joke
It's Jon Batiste* just so you know. But I understand the confusion ;) he baptizes us in the awesomeness of his music
@@Teaganbear Oh thanks, for the correction. I blame Overwatch's character and my muscle memory D:
@@iamscythed A lot of people get it wrong though ;) easy mistake
The writing staff on this talk show is just so friggin' good, it's not even funny. No, wait...
Delta has hit us in Utah, but nobody here GAF. I'm never unmasking again.
gives new meaning to neighbour from hell ...
Texas simpletons keeping us from freedom here too
Remember, you were "Born to Try"🎤🇦🇺😂
kzhead.info/sun/aNGmm5aoZ6Cmg68/bejne.html ..
YEAH!!!! TRUMP!!
I hope they get vaccines ready for the younger kids.
Same. I'm fuckin furious at these anti vaxxers because I have to worry about my 8 year old. Otherwise I'd just say go ahead and refuse the vaccine and die 🤷♂️
You do know the current vaccine is effective against the new strain right??
@@Sirlance87 they arent giving them to kids under 12 yet
@@micah7492 250 kids died in the first year of covid, 200 died the previous flu season. Don’t freak out too much about your 8 year old, it’s still the older people that have serious risks.
Kids don't need it. Only 330 people under 18 years old have died from covid-19 so far. Stop freaking out and look at the data. Stop thinking emotionally.
I liked Stephen better when Evie was his audience.
Evie still attends the show. Just not every night
I just like plain old Stephen. With Evie, with the audience. Yes and yes!
Me too. I only watch a couple of times a week now, instead of every day.
kzhead.info/sun/aNGmm5aoZ6Cmg68/bejne.html ..
I like Stephen just the same, but I seriously love Evie so I do miss her.
JOHN PLAYING THE INTRO TO "STILL DRE" FOR A SECOND! :D
Amazing, 2 weeks after a huge holiday the numbers spike
I was watching some insurrection arrest videos last night and that Brandon Fellows guy was trolling all over and bragging about being at the Capitol. Glad he got arrested.
Stephen is so adorable when he does his faux-angry suit jacket unbutton ❤️
At 2:18, coincidentally the Swedish title for “Animal House” is “Deltagänget”, directly translated into English as “The Delta Gang”.
Im not saying we will have a lockdown but keep that corner studio ready, things are not looking good.
The Fourth Wave is inevitable, and the Unvaccinated Kids won't go back to school for six weeks.
& if anyone has not already stocked up on toiletpaper, they're nuts!
A real vaccine is supposed to stop transmission in addition to providing immunity, whereas these “experimental vaccines” don’t prevent transmission. Efficacy data, even from Israel, is based on an asymptomatic response to subsequent viral re-exposure and NOT on transmission. You can still catch covid and what is worse, continue to infect other people and have it replicate in your body even after both jabs b. The antibodies that you produce in response to the antigen of these inoculations are predominantly “non-neutralizing” as opposed to being mostly neutralizing antibodies like from an ordinary live attenuated vaccine or having naturally overcome the disease. So this passport or green certificate is useless.
@@IbizaPlay all of what you say is possible, and still not worth the risk of avoiding vaccination.
kzhead.info/sun/aNGmm5aoZ6Cmg68/bejne.html !
Considering how many times the #GQP accused the left of living in mommy's basement and playing video games, this puts a smile on my face, a song in my heart and a skip in my gait!❤😅🤣
@Hunterswhore 99% of infections are unvaccinated people along with 99% of hospitalisations. I sense the Trumplodyte is strong in you.
Emerald mara I am sorry your country going through all this too. I feel for all of us caught up in this awful pendemic. We can reaasure each other to stay safe as possible. Blessings from jamaica to u and your family
Teacher always says “Whenever a toilet flushes a republican swims to hell.”
With some of them, you need to flush 15 times…
@@Chunkboi I've been flushing Ted Cruz for years and that effer still stinks up the whole place.
Lol
no wonder your country's a divided mess if that's what you teach your young people! Try teaching science instead of hate!
kzhead.info/sun/aNGmm5aoZ6Cmg68/bejne.html ..
Answer: What do you mean "back"? We never were in lockdown. If you think there was a lockdown in America in 2020, you have no concept of what a lockdown really is.
Let's never go back anyway.
Truth.
Try living in Melbourne 🇦🇺 - we’ve had over 7 months of lockdown since the pandemic started with 4 months straight at one time! We are in our 5th lockdown with no end time !! You don’t know what hardship is yet 🇺🇸 Try 7 months no income 😱
@@derekarmstrong3590 we need another lockdown!
@@thearmchairjournalist566 sorry about your pain. And those horrible mice. And rupert murdoch. And sky news, maybe. Hope you got good folks around you, and ways to bust stress. Namaste, and stay cool.
Looks like Trump's legacy is his supporters burden now.
Huh?
@@michaelgrimm2121 if you need that explained to you then you are not the intended target audience of that comment.
@@michaelgrimm2121 Play stupid games get stupid prizes. Trump supporters basically got razor blades in there candy. After 4 years of Idiocracy even the Biden adminstration tops the previous administration. ✌️
Along with everyone else 😑 need to start throwing around charges of manslaughter for the unvaccinated.
@@gamepapa1211 I thought the benefit of getting him out was that we didn't have to blame everything on him anymore. 10k cases in one week in LA ... What does that have to do with trump?
I'm start to realize I prefer late night shows as talking heads much much more. It felt much more like all of us were being addressed, rather than the audience being performed to.
Skunky nug is hands down the best way to refer to weed
It is painful that others are forcing the rest of us to have to lockdown again
We are just seriously getting back to normality slowly and the last thing we need is to get back on lockdowns 😔
@@DustyJones1997BGCL many people have valid reasons such as bad immune systems for needing others to wear masks, social distance or get vaccinated. I am one of those people that have several medical issues. If others don't want to get vaccinated just make sure not to infect others. Take preventative measures like wearing a mask
@@lauragn4300 "many people"... i doubt that
@@brookwoldesadik1584 because you're a medical statistician, no doubt
@@brookwoldesadik1584 Yes, many people. There are a lot of people with diseases that affect the immune system, getting cancer treatment, unable to take the vax for various reasons, so yes, people should be kind and compassionate by wearing a mask for these many people. And yes, I am vaxxed AND wear a mask, doesn't hurt me one bit.
Oh boy. As a Mormon myself, when I saw "Captain Moroni" pop up. . . *sigh* Let's just say that my disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined.
I completely agree. I think it's people like him that give our church a bad name...
It was bound to happen. I am very disappointed at the church leaders for not really talking against the attempted coup. Only 1 talk on the entire April conference? That did nothing.
@@piratatazmania I concur.
Thank you, writers, for giving us Schumer as Angry Mother Goose, a perfect description of that pic.
homicidal
Olympic Committee: "Make beds that collapse under the weight of 2 people." Olympic Athletes: "Hey, this room has a floor!"
Exactly what I thought xD
I think your jokes are great and love the show but I think the COVID-19 situation is getting worse and should be taken more seriously. This is far from over.
It's called conserving your emotional energy for things that are within your control because always being hyper vigilant is not a sustainable long term strategy. You've gotta develop a plan, then habituate the plan, then adapt the plan upon receipt of new information. But always wringing your hands at the Gods just isn't the optimum emotional state for dealing effectively with a crisis and his jokes provide the levity I need to be effective/not lose my sht on a daily basis.
@@avamasquerade I am from England , this is no laughing matter believe me . The delta varriant is putting healthy people in their early 20s in the ICU . Organ damage and long covid are common in younger people. Children have no symptoms with infection but go onto developing long covid . No one is safe .
Humor is the way some of us deal with COVID
@@hannahdyson7129 And I work at covid testing centers. We deal with this the best way we know how and how I deal with it is why I'm so dmn good at what I do.
You want Covid to be taken more seriously watch the news, not a comedy show.
Stephen you will do what Public Health authorities tell you to do and as a celebrity you will do so cheerfully and set an example for you audience
In 2021 that almost sounds like an insult 🤣
Omg the gladiator guy! I remember watching on January 6 and just seeing a random guy in a gladiator costume walk across the screen. I’m 100% serious. It was so funny and I was shocked that no one mentioned it… until now
Stephen, we stand with you 💯
An overweight middle-aged man who lives with his mother dressed in a cos-play costume attempting to overthrow the government…. Sounds like Murika to me.
The rent may be free, but the Freedom isn't.
Really makes me think the Jan 6 crowd was mostly a bunch of incels looking to get laid. 🙄
'MuriKKKa
@@lacountess I think it was just a bunch of incels. I doubt they were looking for anything. Lemmings are not that smart.
kzhead.info/sun/aNGmm5aoZ6Cmg68/bejne.html ..
*rump and the MAGA crowd are screaming "boo-yeah" at the prospect of doing themselves in.
Not *rump! He's already had his vaccines, as well as his entire family.
Have always loved Stephen's monologues and this one is no exception. Very funny, informative, and witty.
Actually, I miss the "lockdown"
Me too lol 😆 I don't think there gonna do it...
Why exactly? Do you just not have a life at all? Is it an excuse to be lazy? I'm genuinely curious as to why anyone would like this I imagine people that support lockdowns had no life whatsoever
Time to bring back: Q-U-A-R-A-N-T-E-W-H-I-L-E !
YAASSSSS!😍😍😍
I think you missed a couple letters there…
@@wizzardoffuzz Aw shut up! u got the gist of it 🙄but I caught that too 😂🤷🏽♂️
Nothing beats pure peace & joy ! 😉😘🍽🍷
Please no. But yes.
That's a damn good suit Stephen.
And yet I've had people roll their eyes at me because I'm still wearing a mask at work even though I'm vaccinated.
People with Anxiety Disorder : YEAH!!!! ANOTHER LOCK DOWN!!!
On a lighter note, the Darwin awards will be difficult to judge this year...🤔🤗
That's not lighter! I need those in my life!
👍👍👍👍
😆😆😆
The best part of this comment is, one half thinks you’re talking about the other half.
Underrated comment
There are people here that make it really hard to believe in humanity...everyday is a struggle to try and hope.
I hear ya.
What are you hoping for?? One day at a time people -- one foot in front of the other. If you don't have feet, well, I'm sorry.
@Doug Smithart stay in your house please, while conservatives continue to lead happy lives. Just look at the data. Modern liberals are the most depressed demographic politically and it’s easy to see why. You walk around all day playing victim to whatever sort of made up oppression is tickling you this week.
@@Q__tube conservatives don't seem happy. They are all so scared and angry.
Well done Stephen calling the gymnast "Ryan", when his name is right there on the screen. Rhys. It's Rhys.
Stephen's staff probably didn't tell him that Rhys is pronounced 'Reese'.
Who cares
Rewatching and re-enjoying these vids.
Dr. Ruth debunked the “sex negatively affects your performance” myth 40 years ago. 😝
just don't do it while in the race/match
Oh, i thought it was to discourage the spread of covid
@@thatswhatisaid8908 just wear a mask.
kzhead.info/sun/aNGmm5aoZ6Cmg68/bejne.html ..
You must know that the vaccine leaflets clearly state that it is a randomized, double-blind study, which means that it is a study where the nurse who dispenses the vaccines does not know if what is being given is an authentic vaccine or a simple placebo. Which proves that it is an EXPERIMENTAL vaccine.
The only good thing about the pandemic was Stephen without a live audience. I loved those shows.
Yes I was good .he s a good one but I fell bad for him and all the people who believes where ever the government says. I never took my mask off vaccine is good but is new so is the virus we really don't know how good it works is just started to being tested Delta is extremely contagious and letal .when I saw Al this shows and celebrations I told my family I don't know what' the government is thinking but a 10 year old can see they are waiting on Delta the knew it was out there and do nothing let people come air✈️ in thousands and I said people is so naive this is just a break ....I lost I friend couple days ago ( full vaccinated) .now they are taking about travel restrictions kind of later is so weird.i don't know what to think I'm a democrat but I can think for myself and make conclusions.
same I stopped watching after returned to studio, I suppose the relatablility.
@@percyflores7517 Usa is proud of the india variant Sure make the usa's bio weapon cv19 look good in the eyes of the world
Hahaahahah good one!
Lolz at "pass the dutchey on the left-hand side" ...he inceptioned that joke within a joke
Chuck Schumer a.k.a. Homicidal Mother Goose….just kills me. 🐣
Made my whole year having Colbert back on stage. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️❤️
People who spread medical misinformation on Facebook should lose their accounts, no excuses and no second chances.
That goes for Fox News too, the FCC should be shutting them down for killing hundreds of thousands of people.
Great way to get rid of tr*** and many more Republicans, and other unaffiliated nitwits, on Facebook.
No. Millions of people must die first. Not enough people have died.
Who gets to decide what is or isn’t misinformation? Because those are most likely the people you shouldn’t be believing.
@@Q__tube You're *arguing in bad faith* and you know it. Yes, go ahead with your First Amendment rights and _"Don't trust the government, sheep!"_ and Anonymous Internet activity... even while you drink *clean water* and enjoy *constant electricity* made possible by very same government that _"always lying to us"_ ... but don't for a moment think that people don't know what you're doing (reality-denying and pointlessly arguing in bad faith).
I'm Mormon, a democrat, and absolutely disgusted that someone would dress up as a scriptural figure from the Book of Mormon at such a disgusting event as the capitol insurrection.
The Hudson River would start the zombie apocalypse, let’s be real
Oh my God these insurrectionists are comedy gold🤣🤣🤣
Donald's insurrectionist isn't comedy gold it's more like uh oh I'm in trouble for attacking the US Capital
“But that’s where I live “ … yeah right Stephen 😳 I totally agree !
😜 The adamantium claws weren't a mutation - they were artificially added.
Each time I see "Surgeon General" I think of this obscure Dare Devil vilian.
Gaetz/Greene for prison 2021!
You misspelled Biden/Harris
@@victorarredondo304 you must watch fox news. Pay attention to the truth. Fool
@@rontaylor9058 and you watch CNN / MSNBC and just suck it all in huh?
CNN lied so much during the gulf war along with Bush (republican) I will never believe them. Watch democracy now for more of the truth. Most people are lazy and and don't look.
I really like Stephen suit tonight. He really looks good in a black suit. 😍😉
He should be agent S in the next MIB movie 🥰
Agreed
Black Suit set it off.
@@Jadeskorpion ABSOLUTELY!
Stephen I live in a small “city” in S.Fla. I’ve been hearing sirens consistently again,so I’m on Lockdown again!
I had to go go the ER here in a Texas suburb last week, we were packed in triage like sardines with just a curtain between us 😕. I kept bumping into my neighbor's "space" when I had to get out of the bed for tests. It seems like a replay of last winter. I remember hearing sirens too, but I think here they turn them off more, you just see the blue and red flashing lights reflect on the walls when they go down the street. We never really locked down here and I don't think Florida will either. Stay safe!
I really enjoyed your quarantine monologues! And Evie seemed to be audience enough!
Young people are smarter than Olympic organizers. Move the mattress to the floor.
Even smarter, you could just (in theory) seek to not risk your Olympic status by avoiding covid!!!
The sound that came out because of the TJ Maximus joke made my roommate come in to check if I was ok.
Late Show writers and Stephen rock! Especially funny monologue!! I needed a good laugh...
😂😂😂There is a New Zealand fast bowler named Mitchell McClenaghan so I know how to pronounce his last name!🤣🤣🤣
I call dibs on a song titled: Here comes the riot police, mom
You're gonna top the Country charts with that one!
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@@kevincrady2831 Awww I thought this was like a new age poser punk / punk pop album :( @Atheistbatman drop that shh!
Sounds like something written by your local cover version of The Clash.
"Pass the Dutchy" Okay, Colbert gets his black rist band.😂✊🏾
Thumbs up for Colbert, thumbs down for audience.
I love that John Batiste played Shoop’s “The Next Episode”
snoop