/ jschlattsubmissions
Streamed on 8/23/22
/ schlatt
Thumbnail by Buckeera + Riftskeen
/ bucknrift
Managed by Moist
/ moistdx
/ jschlattsubmissions
Streamed on 8/23/22
/ schlatt
Thumbnail by Buckeera + Riftskeen
/ bucknrift
Managed by Moist
/ moistdx
That one where a guy destroyed and chewed up a wasp nest was one of the only ones that schlatt was truly afraid about
To be fair, who wouldn't be afraid of a guy eating a mf wasp nest? That is pure, mineral munching, Florida man behavior, folks.
Do you have a time stamp for that?
@@Giblet12 27:07 my guy
@@brynecol What’s funny is it I saw that clip literally a minute after I commented lol
That was a HORNET nest, pal
08:10 I had a teacher in HS who everyone loved. He told us he purposefully left the smoke alarms dead in his house bc he didn't want his wife to know about his midnight hotboxing sessions in their bathroom, and told her that the alarms were fine, that they all do that. He was a robotics teacher, and his wife was an english teacher at our school. Some kid snitched my senior year and they ended up getting divorced. Next week after we found out about it the snitch's car was stripped for parts and we found out it was the auto/mechanics kids who did it lmao.
Holy shit
Snitches get stitches and also no bitches
@@maninhu9837 also no car by the sounds of it
Did the auto mechanic kids get in trouble?
@@alienenthusiast no. They didnt do it on campus and no one rec. them so nothung could really be done. At best it was coincidental evidence that they "found" his custom rims on the side of the road
Clips: 0:10 Corn Dog Prank 0:46 Driving by Wrench 2:30 I'm good 4:40 Guy Chilling in the Freezer 5:54 Gorilla Popsicle Ft: Smoke Alarm 8:21 Some Guy learns iMovie 9:49 Vape 10:32 rubbing Pepper under the eyes 11:37 Dank Monkey 12:22 Anti Step Shoe Cover 14:36 Fall Guys Season 2 14:55 Biden's Cheatsheet 16:25 It's his Favorite Activity 17:34 Plane flying through city 18:16 How to Build a Fushion Reactor 19:33 "You Probably had no Drip When you were younger" 20:54 Tom Cruise, Top Gun 22:09 Bro was in a Cartoon 23:13 Average U.K Robbery 23:50 Oscar hears a Curse Word 24:49 "Bruh, Move" 25:09 Wasp Nest Crush 27:05 Patriot crushes and Eats Wasp Nest 32:29 Which Grade are you 33:42 Trumpet 34:15 22.5 Pounds of Spicy mini Pickles in Air Fryer 35:21 After my Friend says "Time to get a watch" 36:12 Volkswagen 36:49 Selling crowbar 37:25 This Dog had 50 bones bet on this game 37:44 Chicken Hot as hell 38:42 I guess he bumping 39:14 Jeffery Dahmer 40:07 "Stop holding hands" 40:52 When you forget to give them blankets 41:50 Roblox Car Crash 42:51 DS volume at funeral 43:35 Drinking for the first time? but not with gamersubs 44:01 hot dog roller playing Bob Dylan 44:16 2 pairs of jeans 44:47 some guy doing weird gestures 45:07 Church man chugs beer 45:36 Blue lobster 46:18 Sleepy Joe #1 47:39 Your imposter 48:33 Fridge 50:09 Low Res 50:52 Dababy 51:08 Voice Crack 52:01 Fun Cat 52:30 Bike on life Support 53:02 Drunk falling 54:00 turtle up telephone pole 54:38 Devious asf walk 55:04 Saddest drink drop ever 55:35 Landmine hopscotch 55:57 rat jump-scare 56:27 This thing is smarter than most of you 57:22 goofy ahh phone 58:06 Science Bitch 58:23 Threw a Desk Mid Class 58:48 Watermelon Crack Ft: Schlatt's Future Boyfriend 59:24 "Hit a Trick" 59:39 Grandma steals mail 59:58 Monke 1:00:22 Tomahawking Everybody 1:00:57 Prince Charles when the Queen dies 1:01:11 Moves only climbers can do 1:01:33 2AM in Louisville 1:01:50 Who's that Pokemon Ft: Monke 1:02:09 Dad celebrating divorce be like 1:02:36 rapping with Hairbrush mic 1:06:56 Guy intimating dog bark 1:07:16 Drive-thru outro 1:07:54 Sleepy Joe #2 Ft: Bin Laden 1:08:48 Slippery bridge 1:10:17 LGBT Lights 1:10:42 "Whole Milk" 1:12:01 Tom Cruise Japan 1:13:29 Bro "Saved" chair in the nick of time 1:13:59 Hot boxing UHAUL 1:14:44 Driving like he in Mario kart 1:15:31 Hide ya Presents 1:16:17 ignore my laugh 1:17:07 WTF is wrong with those Cats 1:18:43 Realistic Hulk Filter 1:19:20 Carbon monoxide 1:19:48 bro hopped on fortnite 1:20:54 Schlatt Watches some KZhead Shorts 1:23:19 His homie had to come get him 1:23:54 fartsoundreverb.mp3 1:24:25 Sleeping prank 1:24:58 Russian bread vs brick 1:25:24 bro flexed mid apology 1:26:00 Shit ruined by firework 1:26:42 Catbag 1:26:59 Will Smith cat 1:27:41 Paused my game to be here 1:28:04 The Audio ruined it 1:28:44 Texas Mosquitoes 1:29:28 I've been doing this for years man 1:30:31 I love burritos 1:30:50 Charles Manson of Tiktok 1:31:16 Hawaiian Style Glizzie 1:31:42 Child gets in the WWE 1:31:53 Caveman Mcdonalds sprite 1:33:04 We are Processing this video. Please Check Back Later 1:34:07 Roller Coaster stare 1:35:26 School Toilets 1:36:04 what a Catch 1:36:27 What are those?! 1:36:52 Man's been holding this since WW1 1:37:15 Shadow was attacked earlier 1:37:48 "You two fuckers just made the biggest mistake of your lousy careers" 1:38:34 Free School Supplies 1:38:57 Damn we fr stuck 1:39:15 Do you like Waffles 1:39:39 GTA Baby shot 1:41:09 Enrolling her into the army 1:41:31 Steak dinner 1:41:52 Upper Decker 1:42:34 Lawnmower vs Carpet 1:43:09 Had to get the boys right 1:43:34 mattress fall 1:44:33 Boing 1:44:56 Kitten confession 1:45:20 Jump over table fail 1:45:58 Sending him back home 1:46:15 Tags Evolving 1:46:27 Who's Toddler on These Roads 1:46:56 Fortnite Back Bling 1:47:25 guy never has said anything 1:48:19 McFlurry Rap 1:48:57 Mcdonalds cup thrown 1:50:03 Shower Ghost 1:50:48 Your not From Chicago
IT TAKES A MANIC INSANE PERSON TO DO THIS. THANK YOU.
You're a true heroes
god amongst men
My God. Every single clip...
thankyou man
With that wasp nest one, the fact they all flew away rather than fight just shows how often he does this. The wasps know they will only lose again.
Great video, i threw up 9 times.
Ah yes watched 30 seconds and threw up (They posted this comment 30 seconds after the video was released if ur confused)
lmao
💀
same but seppuku
Hello Master Hero Samurai
I love how he titles these as if he actually ranks any of them, great bit big guy
It's such a good bit by Schlaggermeister
Such a great bit by Cutey Petutey
But he does rank them, he ranks them into the categories of "funny," "not funny," and "this will get me banned"
@@castafiorept7309 My favorite tier is "I can't show meth recipes!"
@@Calmtimer My favorite tier is the one where he says “My Dementia hasn’t affected me as a person” 20 times and then continues to the next one
1:38:00 Hey schlatt, I Noticed that when youre hearing the tapping, your microphone is moving up and down. Its most likely the boom arm hitting on the table, or the XLR cable thats hanging from it swinging and hitting your desk. This will usually make uncharacteristic low rumble or tapping noise that will sound a lot like someone knocking on your wall, especially if you have headphones in while youre monitoring the audio thats coming thru the mic. Hope you see this and get rid of that paranoia, this used to happen to me all the time until i figured out what it was.
Or those of us living in his walls are just hungry
@@marieeeeboonanana Surving of whats left of Jambo's cat food.
@@sdaniaalyou are now my food get in my belly
@@Doginawall what the fuck mister morgan?
This one annoys me slightly so I'm going to try to explain it. I study Physics and Astrophysics and have a love for reading about Fusion reactors and technologies and wanted to clear up some misconceptions. Fusion reactors are NOT Fission reactors. they may both be nuclear, but they are completely different concepts. If a video teaches you how to make a fusion reactor, they put a lot of effort into making it, as Fusion reactors are REALLY hard to make. While Fission reactors use the breakdown of heavy elements like Uranium and Plutonium to generate heat, Fusion reactors generate heat in the opposite way, by combining elements to release an enormous amount of energy, far more than a Fission reactor of the same size and complexity. Currently Fusion reactors are so expensive and hard to make the amount of good they do is low, although we have made recent breakthroughs and only a few months ago reached ignition, meaning the reactor is hot enough to fuse elements without external power. Fission reactors can melt down at only a few thousand degrees, while Fusion reactors don't even function until they reach MILLIONS of degrees. the record is holding a reaction at 126 million degrees Fahrenheit (70 million Celsius) for around 10 seconds. Surprisingly, Fusion reactors are far safer than Fission reactors, even modern ones, as they physically cannot meltdown due to the way they function. If the plasma in the reactor gets too hot, it expands, cooling down. If the plasma touches the walls of the reactor, it will evaporate, turning back into gas due to the temperature difference of it and the magnetic containment of the reactor, stopping the reaction cold. Sorry if this is long, but I just wanted to get this out here so that people know this. TL;DR: Fusion reactors are not Fission reactors, and are perfectly safe.
This was a whole essay
ok
🤓
Fusion reactors/ artificial stars
Why type this?
Schlatts gonna have a “rating your awful cars” stream, calling it now
I’m pretty sure most of his fanbase is under 16 so I’m not sure if he could but if he does it’s gonna be a field day
Most of them are either going to be those toy cars for toddlers or completely totaled
He's just gonna review the average RICEd Honda
pleaseee he needs to
We can only hope this actually happens
“As long as it gives you hydration, does the size really matter?” -Jschlizzle, 2022
It probably has personality to
@@BigBrainGamer58 JSchlong is wise as always
Jscholorl giving us useful information
1:15:51
23:16 The "My apologies original gangster." had me more out of breath than my terminally ill grandfather.
This man unironically likes watching tiktoks more than talking to his friends on his podcast
so excited to see "Schlatt" try to "integrate" back into society after his horrible "deeds" in 1999
i hate“schlatt” he’s so cool
See? Everyone deserves a 267th chance
@@-_-murilo2865 Yeah, but after the 268th chance you gotta be a little suspicious
YO, i saw you in ultrakill!
why do people keep putting schlatt in quotation marks
Whoo, another schlinkle vod. I love watching schloohicky on my days off
Yea, schlinky is great, I love sclhuncle
@@ItheBUG_ bro, schlolipop is my favorite
@@ohdannyboygamer7759 schtake is the best schtreamer
@ItheBUG schwopper rlly knows how to make good content
@@ohdannyboygamer7759 yea schitten is gonna live forever
1:41:26 schlatt saying “stay toxic” is exactly what i needed today, thank you 🙏
i love how the video starts with him being cheerful, then his sanity slowly cripples throughout the video
The last video Schlatt made before tragically losing his life in a plane crash. Now he truly looks just like Buddy Holly 😔✊️
SCHLEEZER
"Schlatt"*
@@kerfuckingplunk who?
@@fourstarshit john schlatter
The day the Schloozic died
As a college student, i'm so glad that you upload these to youtube. I love rewatching these and listening to them while I study.
that's not... very productive.
Man, i sure do love learning how to make meth while studying
@@Nebulous_Nebula who the hell asked you
@@vibive for someone called Vibe you sure know how to kill one
Same here, just change college to high school. If studying gets hard tune the brain in for a couple hours then go to sleep and cram in the morning for the ultimate mic
can we take a moment to appreciate that schlatt spent 2 minutes and 20 seconds being amazed by a popsicle
That cat video at 52:00 is what my elderly manx cat used to sound like. sometimes when cats get older they can lose their voices (sometimes as a result of conditions like hyperthyroidism, which was the case for mine) and my girl used to just click at me sometimes. That video gave me a happy memory of her and i appreciate whoever sent it tbh
He’s pumping these out faster then he got rid of the bodies in 1999
As one of the bodies i can confirm
But he did make those bodies stop pumping blood back in 1999
Allow me to make the guy eating the “wasp” nest worse by telling yall it was a hornet nest which is so much worse
why is that worse
@@vibive Hornets are massive assholes. Most stinging insects sting you in self defense, and are more than happy to leave you alone if at all possible. Hornets will come sting you just because "fuck you" *and* they'll sting you multiple times.
It’s a longer word so it’s scarier
@@vibive hornets have killed people and they're basically wasps on steroids
@@vibive Think of wasps as a sharp pencil stabbing you A hornet, on the other hand, is a guy just straight up stabbing you using a knife
These Schlamalamadingdong VODS always make me laugh 🥰
5:52 "Schlatt": I'm not gonna judge Also "Schlatt" with the most judgeful look on his face: dear lord, what is this?
I’m actually scared of that guy being able to eat a wasp nest like does he feel anything??
He loves it.
Unfiltered rage
This is the true power of a Florida Man.
Feel power
Yeah, lust
Quality stuff Mr. Shart Can’t wait to tune in tomorrow for another quality stream of react content :)
Mr Shlattatude's streams are always fun
Mr schlatalatalats streams are quality.
SHART☠️☠️☠️
@@Tacos113 CONDITION 💀💀💀
Schlart
Jschlatt, I’m glad you uploaded this. I lost one of my family and instead of going to their funeral I’m watching this VOD.
This is a joke btw, the VOD cheered me up, but someone in my family did unfortunately pass.
R.I.P 💀
My favorite meme was at 9:11. It had me laughing for hours on end!
All the typical moments 14:55 Sleepy Joe 16:24 9/11 Joke 18:16 How to build a fusion reactor 19:33 9/11 Joke 2 20:54 It's free 45:07 Protestant Moment 46:18 Sleepy Joe 2 1:07:54 Sleepy Joe 3
When a potentially future source of energy is so unknown that schlat wonders if he can show it on stream: sad fusion :(
Nice
As a Protestant I can confirm that was indeed a Protestant moment
What about 1:14:45
1:15:34 Bro is a whole who-vileian
The guy eating the wasp nest actually fucking shocked me, I don't think I've ever had a more visceral reaction to a video on your streams before
22:16 you could say it really... knocked his socks off
You know it feels like a new video every time I watch this! I barely remember any of them! You know this is an amazing new video from JSchlatt, seems oddly familiar... Great stuff KScratt!
Alternative title: Schlatt laughs at middle class people for an hour and fifty-three minutes
Gg
And 27 seconds
I’m calling it. The new trend in the upcoming react videos will be to have low battery smoke alarms in the background.
That and the meth memes lmao
@@GreyHound441 meth memes that a JUST carefully made where they're not actually doing anything wrong but enough to make Schlatt scared
I love how "Schlatt's" immediate response to seeing a cat in the thumbnail of a video is just to say hello to the little guy
I watch these while I work, and I love it. Your content makes me laugh.
does this imply that there will be more presentations? because if so, i'm completely up for it, the last ones were absolutely sick also, love how at 38:31 Schlatt questions the fact that he's wearing an elf shirt, but completely ignores the fact he has a necklace with chicken wings hanging off of it
also funny because it is, in fact, a national lampoon shirt
don't forget the cucumber on there lmao
I like that "Schlatt" actually acknowledges that us vod watchers exist and I hope he will one day acknowledge what he did in 1999
I love how “Schlatt” is so “confused” every time he sees another person with “sideburns”
18:00 this is in Australia, its part of a yearly airshow but they practice so it happens more than once a year, they dont empty the buildings as a precaution because they do it in the middle of the day whilst people are working
I think 9/11 jokes are so funny to younger people because in school it was talked about so many times in school and emphasized so much when literally none of the kids understood or cared about it, so it just became a joke
Funny indoctri-
This. It's funny cause it's so tragic for people but we hear about worse shit on the daily. It could be taken as spite, wanna talk about how bad 9/11 was but in retrospect it's not even the worst thing to happen to America at the time. It was a bunch of ignorant American's first tragedy, and surprise the government manipulated them into believing it was world ending. Anyone who actually still cares about 9/11 is so beyond the point you can't take them seriously, hence the fuck you funny
I don't think that's completely accurate. It's not that "literally none of the kids understood" it. It's only that they weren't visibly directly affected.
@@Memu_ No, 9/11 just isn't that tragic compared to everything else that's happened. Unless you were there, it didn't matter, cause you weren't fear mongered into believing it was anything more than terrorism. It was America's first, ooooo sorry after a few intruder drills the week prior it wasn't all that shocking seeing a plane fly into a building. The majority of the class was more interested in the cool plane crash, because that's really all it is at this point. Sad story with plane crash, next lesson is the child soldiers in Iraq, but that's not America so it's not that bad right? People are getting carpet bombed TODAY, and you finna bitch about 2 building over 20 years ago? Pfffff alright boomer nice priorities.
@@Memu_ can confirm from experience
Shatt's entire audience should be on a watch list lmao 💖
i love what he did to those people💖
@@fartsimulator-of9li why is old jerma your pfp
Hello
I agree, and I'm one of them
17:55, that's Sydney (might be wrong) Aero Show, that's tradition to fly through the city... Crazy Aussies
I love how jshlatt says to not die in a fire and just replace batteries but then he is completely against seatbelts 💀 6:53
Jschlatt: this is disrespectful to the people who died on the titanic. Also Jschlatt: laughs at 911 jokes.
2,977
Thanks schlim schlady for the vod for those of us unworthy of watching the stream
To bad he gave me schlamidya after he snuck up behind me in the showers 😔😔😔
i love the way you interact with ur audience and play along with there jokes
34:15 WTF WAS THE RED SHIT MIXED IN WITH THE PICKLES?!?! SWEAR TO FUCK HE MURDERED SOMEONE AND TRIED TO HIDE IT IN THE PICKEL BOX!
I know it was a joke but schlatt could easily do a series of reacting to words in the dictionary and make it entertaining.
I love how sometimes he visibly recoils from TTS like it's an irritant. God Bless jschlatt.
I love watching the vod and never checking out live stream. I love it so much.
That was me in the baby shooting one haha, much love schlatt, love the content ❤️
My favorite part was when Jschlatt said: it’s jschlatting time. And then proceeded to schlatt the J.
1999
this is the perfect vod to steal traffic signs to
its not stealing if theyre free
@@alanam994 of course, of course. i simply meant "steal" as in "incredible deal" because of course receiving signs for free is a bargain.
I love it when Shleukemia uploads! 👍
schlapght is like the only person that makes watching tiktok compilations actually funny
The fact he’s actually making reaction type content funny and not losing his personality in it
thank you shlatata for making such inspirational videos and twitch streams, really changed my life
Please make more merch I loved the last drop
Bro these "Schlatt" vods make my day so much better! Keep up the good work Shlumperknickle.
My biological family only _just_ survived a house fire due to my bio brothers negligence, he was drunkenly cooking and left a pan of oil on the oven (he forgot to turn it off) and the fire alarms hadn’t been sorted in ages, apparently the batteries just died… so no warning system, almost went up in smoke, had to escape out a small window to avoid literally dying. I haven’t spoken to my bio family in several years but I’ve always made sure my fire alarms work, the batteries get changed as soon as, and I had the fire brigade check my home because they offer it as a free service. They were impressed and I explained why I was so cautious “Oh I was working that shift, I remember that house fire, it was so avoidable and your biological brother was an annoyance to deal with” So yeah, make sure to change your fire alarm batteries, it’s actually life saving.
Man you can’t even have steering wheels in Detroit
I had nothing to do so i watched schlatt for 2 hours.amazing experience
"Schlatt" always makes the best "videos" and i can't wait to "enjoy" more.
thank you, jschum! another great VOD!
29:21 this man is the definition of i hate wasps and having alot of bravery
❤Loved this video 😂, also I wanted to acknowledge that I did notice him wearing a Michigan sweatshirt through the whole video! go blue!!! 💛💙
I just finished rewatching the 5 hour long DayZ stream and will now keep watching this for the next two hours 😀
I love how monkeys legitimately make Schlatt happy
Hey not cool. We don’t call them that.
I suppose we don’t. But I do
i love when he says the water bottle is small and the entire chat is saying its average
I love how around halfway through the VOD, chat started singing the Liv & Maddie theme song
Hey schlatt so nice to finally catch your steam live in chat here rather than being a vod watcher
I SENT IN THE VIDEO OF THE GUY EATING THE HORNETS. SO HAPPY
Schlatt is like the only KZheadr that adds to TikTok’s when reacts to them
Schlatt is so funny, keep it up.
Hey schlungulate, I’ve been loving the content. It makes me very happy
Thank goodness. I love Schlatt VODS. You always seem to stream when I'm sleeping tho :((
11:02, that made my eyes tear up so badly I couldn't see for a few minutes, just by pure placebo
"im not gonna judge" literally the next second "dear lord wtf is this"
i swear every time one of these streams happen schlatt relearns how amazing his audience is lol
16:00 we all love the old sleepy neck sniffer
“Is that a wrench” looking at a pair of locking pliers 😂😂 comedy
23:45 im glad this meme is gaining traction fr shits hilarious
The fact that "Jschlatt" didn't know what a fusion reactor was until chat gave him another way of saying it is astounding to me.
at 23:55 i knew it was gonna get funny. i saw the cat on tiktok before vod and had the best time in a while.
Imagine not just removing your smoke alarms entirely
2:45 pov: you're trying to kill a bug with bug spray but its not dieing
I sure do love watching my favorite angry man watch other people’s content days after it happened!
Yayyy new Schlatt VOD!! This sounds like a fun one, excited for more content from my comfort streamer hehehehe
how the hell do you feel comfortable watching this man
@@RealHampter Good point, discomfort steamer is a better word
@@RealHampter it's "Schlatt", he comforts everyone, we do not acknowledge what he did in 1999
@@iiomqfaderz Also a good point, nothing happened in 1999 what are you talking about
Those women were not very comfortable with “schlut” back in 1999
The hair one at two and a half minutes is how hitman assassinations work
I know I'm late but, if you want schlatt to react to fan art, you're gonna need a level ten insult resistance
13:25 Give him plenty of room. Research how to take care of him. Maybe give him a friend. Adjust tank size. Give him a tech deck when you have to clean his tank.
21:18 nobody in chat recognized that porch, its the one with the hog just staring blankly into the camera
hooks into a shaping amplifier, which is followed by a Single Channel Analyzer (for setting the detection discrimination level), followed by a pulse counter and/or rate meter. Shown in the first picture is my NIM setup, the second picture is the pre-amplifier attached to a moderated helium-3 tube, the third picture is a bubble detector after being exposed to neutrons. STEP 7: Fire It Up (and Cross Your Fingers) Time to turn it on (don't forget to cover any viewports/cameras with lead! Also x-rays can pour out of ceramic feedthroughs so point them away from people. It is a good idea to be monitoring for x-rays where any people are present). The basic procedure is: -Turn on the roughing pump and wait for sufficient backing pressure, turn on the diffusion or turbo pump and wait for it to fully warm up or achieve running speed -Throttle the chamber back (with the valve between the diffusion/turbo pump and the chamber) -Ever so slightly open the needle valve to the deuterium tank -Turn up the high voltage until either plasma establishes on the camera, or you've reached 40kv and nothing has happened (don't forget, you only get one chance in your life to screw up with voltages of this degree) -If nothing has happened, keep admitting more gas and the pressure should keep going up. Plasma should form around 40kv at about 10-15 microns of deuterium. If all goes well, you should see on your camera the image below, and you should be detecting neutrons at this point. Operation is quite a balancing act, since the voltage is controlled by both the power supply, but also by Paschen's Curve and Ohm's Law relating to the pressure in the chamber. Great patience is required to "Get the hang of it", but after doing so it becomes quite simple to run. Operation can be aided by an ion-gun which will not be discussed in this article.
Shlatt is the only person i watch watching tiktoks because he is actually really funny and his reactions are AWESOME
These VODS have been getting progressively shorter and shorter, we need more content!
another great vod from jshat
39:03 I don't know if it narrows it down much (if at all, really) but whatever he's dancing to is about 126BPM, judging by what he's doing with his feet. For context, that's how fast YMCA by The Village People and September by Earth Wind And Fire are.
I hated the "I don't know, can you?" thing teachers did until I became a substitute teacher and now I think it's hilarious
Cycle of abuse
Love the stream keep up the good work schlatt