Why Moving Abroad Was The Best Decision Of My Life
My newsletter: benjaminantoine.substack.com
Isn’t it interesting how you can look back at your life and pinpoint certain pivotal moments? Events or decisions which changed the course of your life forever.
Leaving home and Moving abroad was one of those pivotal moments for me. And I just cannot begin to imagine how my life would be now if I had not made this decision. I think it’s safe to say I would not be the person that I am today because although I didn’t know it at the time this set things in motion which ultimately led to a life that was very different to anyone that I knew at the time.
To leave everything you know for something which is uncertain is exciting but it’s also very scary. Especially if you’re turning down safe and secure paths in favour of the familiar.
In this video I cover why this was of the best decisions I've ever made and why I decided to go for it.
Chapters:
00:00 - Intro
01:04 - Looking for a paradigm shift
02:59 - How do you learn best?
03:45 - Preconceived ideas challenged
04:40 - The power of loneliness
05:57 - Using your environment as a forcing function
#movingabroad #makingachange #selfknowledge
I do agree that living abroad has also changed my life. It’s expanded my horizon, provided experiences I would otherwise not have made and significantly allowed me to have new circles of friends. But it has also somewhat cut some ties with my home country, which I see with very different eyes now. But overall, I’d say that I have massively benefited from it
I think that is an inevitable consequence of leaving…although some do decide to return and end up appreciating things which used to annoy them
Thank You for this video. I totally agree. Living abroad is life changing. I started trusting myself, I was proud that I can create my life in a new place without any support from family and friends. Problems start, if you come back. The more you experience, the more disconnected and alienated you feel back home. I moved back and I am leaving again.
It will always take time to readjust even when moving back. But sometimes you just don’t feel at him in certain places and that’s also ok
leaving that toxic guy. even though I was so in love, I've seen the fact that he was not good for me. despite these three years, having that power to let go of the toxicity and all the manipulation around, I'm proud of myself. do it people. you're gonna travel around the world and everything's gonna start to work for you. 😉
Well done and good for you😀👍🏻
I also often think about pivotal moments in my life. As a fellow Brit living in Germany, I think about what would have happened had I been turned down for the internship I did in Germany through the DAAD back in 2017, which made me realised I wanted to move to Germany after my degree. Or if I had accepted my offer to do my undergraduate degree in Australia back in 2015, rather than staying in the UK, as I ended up doing. I'm very happy with my current trajectory in life, but it's strange to think that, based on small things like one person at the DAAD choosing another person instead of me for the internship placement, my life could have gone off in an entirely different direction.
Yes that really is incredible how someone else’s decision can affect us so much. Best thing is to look forward and try to catch some of these moments when they are actually happening.
I totally agree. For me living abroad was one of the best choices, too. I love every day now.🤩, even if it's a bad one
I appreciate so much the truth and honesty of your videos. Thank you Benjamin.
I appreciate that, thanks for commenting
Some food for thought here. I love it! You seem to be a really interesting bloke, it's a shame I left Frankfurt and lost to opportunity to meet up.
Where did you end up moving to?
Doing an exchange as a Junior in a US High School in 2000 emancipated me earlier from my parents than I might have otherwise. Until now, I still can't stand superficial people, or people who are "smushing" me with their feelings, just because society is expecting them to be this or that. (I'm me, not what you'll want me to be and yes, that sometims stands in my way, but I'd rather not get that job then.) I'm more often travelling abroad, hopefully Ghana/AsaBaako in 2024, get to know different people from other countries rather than staying in my bubble and with that always connect people, because a helpful line at a party is "hey, great you're here too, do you know that person right here? you should work together."
The experience living abroad as Erasmus student was great to deep dive into the language and culture no turist short term stay can deliver. When you visit a school reunion do you stand out as someone crazy to went to China for two years or now living in Germany for so long? Or you find a like minded person you share the same mastery of getting out of your comfort zone.
No now things have matured and people find it interesting.
You are a philosopher and a practical person at the same time it seems to me. I love the way you dive deep and share honestly your perspective. Thank you! I agree with you 100% that getting out of our comfort zone is what grows us stronger and allows us to expand. It's so boring to do the same old thing all the time: what a waste of our precious life time! ;-)
Thanks Bee. I always find it so interesting that there are so many people that think very differently. I was at a work event this weekend and many colleagues (Germans in their 50s) had never been to Berlin. That was pretty mind blowing for me.
Thank you yet again for thought-provoking content! Imagine taking the brave step from a far off Third World country to First World luxury... Having worked professionally in Public Relations and Training one suddenly realised how much more there was to learn. German was another beautiful language & culture to explore. Pivotal moment? I had many & still believe in miracles 😊
You’re never too old to believe in miracles 😉
Ahh, I see you changed your channel's name. I always appreciate your candidness and authenticity. I want to add the the production quality of your videos is top notch, from the audio of your speaking to the random video footage spliced together. It's really well done. Do you have a team that helps you shoot or cull the scenes from somewhere or are you doing it yourself? Cheers!
Thanks a lot that’s encouraging to hear. I do everything myself. I’ve still got a lot to learn
You won't be able to hide from life - even if one of those persons, - like me for instance :) - who whish things to stay as they are and to keep it calm and peaceful. Life will hunt you down sooner or later and force you to adapt to changes, that you didn't choose and maybe can't control. And even if it feels like hell at the moment - afterwards you realize, that you wouldn't like to have missed anything of what you experienced because it made you learn and aware of your potential.
Yes yes yes 👍🏻
Moving abroad and learning new languages is the ultimate flex Raising kids in a new country makes them so intuitive it’s a super power
💪💪
Nice video. Moving to China must have been quite an experience. I would say it is probably one of those places where the term "culture shock" would still apply. I find living in Germany pretty much similar to anywhere else in Europe to be honest and at the end of the day I am only one hour on a plane from the UK. Also learning the language helps you integrate. When I was a student in the 80s I spent a year in Canada. There I felt something of that loneliness that you mentioned. I am thinking if I did it again now it would be different, with the internet and Skype and other forms of instant communication. Back then, we were still writing letters and a phone call to the UK was very expensive.
Yes things have changed a lot. Although messaging and Skype existed it was still something you only really did at home/in you apartment. Not on the go
Funny this video has been released less than a day after me deciding to apply for orchestras in Germany
What a coincidence. I usually only post every other week…so this week was not planned
What an upgrade in your Content Benjamin. I moved to Germany from the US 6 years ago - although our Western European Cultures are probably most culturally intertwined with North America, I still feel like these nuances hit close to home and are difficult to explain to those loved ones who have never moved more than a few miles from "home".
Thanks a lot Kenneth. That means a lot🤗
Again you hit the point perfectly, Benjamin; moving abroad is worth the experience almost at any rate, even if it's just temporary without an open ending. Cultural shocks inclusive, but so what - my beloved Lotti Huber would have said: "Liebling, das is' Leben!" Personally I am glad that you are living here in Germany now for otherwise we wouldn't have your interesting videos here ... In diesem Sinne weiterhin Dir einen schönen Sonntag!🌈🌞🛋️🧸👍
Vielen Dank Torsten😀. Wünsche dir auch ein schönen Sonntag noch 😀
Vielen Dank, Benjamin!😊
I am 30 and have lived abroad at various points in my 20s (an internship in Berlin and later a Masters with semesters in Scotland, Spain and Germany). These were hugely beneficial experiences. I've been back in the UK since I was 26, not entirely out of choice but due to covid, Brexit, job opportunties etc. I'm in a good career, but also single and renting. I've been feeling like I need another big paradigm shift but wonder if it's too late for me to move abroad (for example I can't hack drinking all the time to meet people now!). Any advice?
So, if I understood well, you left China because you felt lonely? Was that the only reason? Don't you feel the same in rigid and cold German society? I'm asking you these because it may help me make a decision. I'm currently in China, thinking of moving out, but not because of loneliness, already other reasons. Thank you
No it wasn’t because of loneliness per se. It was a mixture of many things but a large part of it was that I didn’t want to be an English teacher and it was a real struggle finding something else.