The Surprising Truth About What Women Find Attractive
2023 ж. 13 Сәу.
247 292 Рет қаралды
Alex DatePsych describes the things men often get wrong about what women find attractive in men. Why is Gigachad actually not attractive to women? What facial features do women find attractive in a man? Which psychological traits are women attracted to?
#dating #men #psychology
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Hello you legends. Watch the full episode with Alex here - kzhead.info/sun/nJyShtydoaeAnmg/bejne.html
What birth control pharmaceutical stats are there for this study?
@Fenwick Chick The part about trad wifes made me laugh, thank you for that! I think you are right, a stereotypical incel might not be open to data he does not want to hear, and that the problem runs deeper. But also, they are a group made of individuals, and some individuals might even get something out of these datapoints. These men are hurting! We need to try to help them whichever way we can. It can also help to say where they are right. Because: Feminism did gum up the works of society. With a lot of help from the pill and very special generational circumstances (a looot of young people without guidance because esp. Older men were so decimated through two world wars). There is no denying we have lost our way I think. But women being cleaning and cooking sex bots is not the answer to that. And hey, I'm a traditional wife, but I would not feel good being reduced to something like that, I would run! They did see some patterns that are objectively wrong but their interpretation of what to do with that is skewed. What I mean is: we need to show incels some love too. Affirming the good in them, sometimes tough love. Perhaps even datapoints 😉 Then they will be much more able to love themselves one day too
Look up a video called Lookmaxxing for Your Masculinity, by Chadify. It seams to be extremely relevant to what you are discussing in this video.
Feminism is the cause of societal decay.
😂😂😂
One of the things that guys get wrong about what women find attractive is long goatee beard.
He's a Chad so it doesn't matter.
What do you mean?
@@kryptokodex what do I mean?!
I have the same goatee except it’s in my pants
@@monkeybrains5077 😂😂😂
Giga Chad is not a handsome archetype, he is a physical image of an exaggerated Masculine archetype.
Johny Depp or Ricky Martin types in their young age are much more appealing than Giga Chad. These guys are pretty boys, some will say feminine but they would get way more girls than giga chad.
@@joeshugabowski1444 they were very sexy. The overly muscular, extremely masculine guy is attractive to the male gaze. For women, what we find sexy in men is the good looks but the way they look at you, the charm, the way they make you feel at ease. The female gaze sees a sexiness that isn’t about any overly muscular body. It’s more the charisma, good looks but mixed with confidence and a man who really loves women and knows what to do with them. Some very masculine men don’t have the same sex appeal and don’t seem to even like the company of women very much. These men have a much better understanding of what women actually want.
Exactly. It's just a meme
@@viviennedunbar3374the female gaze doesn't exist.
Old people thinking memes=reality is funny.
There's a problem with this. What a woman says she is attracted to is different to the guy she ends up sleeping with.
Because attractive qualities in a husband are different from what you want in a fling or relationship in college. You don’t have to worry about responsibilities, finances, raising kids or job opportunities during college or if you have a fling at any stage. In a marriage, there’s that and much more. There are married couples who haven’t been able to overcome challenges and solve problems effectively. Some have exacerbated problems. The risk of autistic, handicapped or disabled children, is real. The risk of disease in adults is real. Some people cannot overcome challenges. You need to know that your spouse, will SOLVE and overcome the problems WITH you, without blaming you. Not exacerbate or leave the problem, allowing it to fester. You want to know that your offspring have a future. Not that their futures will be stuck. A man who takes charge, will not allow his children’s future to be compromised. In case of an intelligent professional in his 30’s, with a background of solving problems and overcoming challenges, personally and professionally, you will not have to ASK him questions related to this. If he doesn’t share information regarding this aspect or he doesn’t seem to understand, then it’s fair to assume that he’s not the one. A man in his 30’s should have a few things he has overcome and quite a few problems he has solved in his own life and that of his family’s. So you don’t only look at physical attraction or how nice the guy is, for marriage. You look at that AND the degree, to which he can provide and protect you and your future children. You look at the future you can build together.
Women will sleep with anything though. What kind of metric is that to use? Thats's like talking to gorillas about their favorite bananas, when it will turn around and eat its own feces if he's so inclined to.
That's street mythology. That's not exactly true. What you say is only true for women who lie about what they want out of shame or embarrassment. There are plenty of women I've met who speak and act in accordance with each other. All the women I've slept with or had relationships with as well were openly interested in men like me, they weren't saying "oh I like this sort of guy" and then sleeping with me as if I was totally different than that.
@@wowomah6194 If a girl likes you obviously she is going to say you are her type. But when they are asked by other people they will say things that are orthogonal to what they attract them like kindness or intelligence (i.e. It is proven by studies that couples overestimate the intelligence of their partners). Usually they are thinking how they would like to be treated by someone who is far more attractive than most guys so they think loyalty, kindness, sense of humor etc while undermining behaviours or characteristics that actually turn them on.
@@wowomah6194 Its not street mythology. Women are far more susceptible to hormones than men are b/c they go through radical hormonal changes each month which has a direct impact on the type of guys they find attractive at any given time. Its why there is no "set" physical archetype that women are attracted to; the studies show there's a wide variance of "types" for attractive women. There's plenty of young college aged women who are in love with their chubby, middle aged, balding professors as well as plenty of young college aged women who are in love with the jock in their classes. The key thing with understanding attraction in women is that it's looks play a very small role in what women find attractive. They articulate this as "confidence" being the most attractive thing in a man, which when translated to man speak means you can hold your ground against her and hold your ground against other men. This should come out in your social skills and how you carry yourself. When this is at the forefront then looks largely become irrelevant which is exactly why they will fall for that chubby, middle aged, balding college professor in class...
Having a community/social circle around you is so important. It not only introduces you to other people but also gives you a true sense of worth and confidence.
If you're a below average looking guy the social circle won't matter. You'll be there but just be unwanted when it comes to sex and dating. It can be an even worse feeling than not socialising with women at all.
Self-worth is intrinsically derived...you can fake it till you make it. Can't make other people value and "like" you...
@newperson9662 You obviously don’t know what confidence does to a man’s appeal..
@@dreday77764keep coping boyos
There was some study that debunked the dark triad thing by controlling for physical attractiveness. Basically you can get away with a lot by being good-looking.
Being handsome doesn't hurt, but it's about #4 on the list of things that women find attractive in men.
Look at all the shit hot women get away with by being hot
Confidence is whats attractive.
@@Locke350 it doesnt. Creepyness and confidence are two different things that arent portrayed by looks.
@@Locke350 yea but this is mostly used as an excuse by guys that dont want to put the effort in to working on their confidence. Carrying yourself confidently is a different behaviour than being creepy. Even attractive men can exhibit creepy behaviour that gets noticed as such.
Imagine taking a survey of what women think is attractive based on a picture, and thinking that translates 1:1 to real life.
@Fenwick Chick Yup. The only difference, however, would be the distinction of result-based intent. The OK Cupid data, though things are definitely manipulated, still shows real-life intent. The judgement of the digital image of a fake person includes the foreknowledge that the person isn’t real, and no effect/result will come from the judgement.
@Fenwick Chick I don’t disagree, but even highly controlled observational studies inject bias or influence the participants in ways they can’t perceive. It’s unavoidable. The OK Cupid data is useful, since the men and women weren’t influenced one way or another, except via the constrains of the platform (e.g. photos, text, etc.), and of course the algorithms. Nevertheless, if the algorithm feeds you only X, Y, and Z types, and you reject them all, it suggests you reject X, Y, and Z types. The primary issue with dating apps is that they give the illusion of infinite choice. So even a 10/10 by your standards yesterday, may only be a 7/10 today since, with infinite choice, there’s always a true 10/10 around the corner (that you haven’t seen, and is implied by incite choice). And sure, things like garbage photos men take will have an impact (a limitation of the platform / medium of introduction). On the flip side, men see endless profiles with women having filtered their photos, fill makeup, etc. There’s also the fact that men don’t go around gaming picture if themselves, their friends, etc. Women, on the other hand, take endless photos of themselves, each other, etc. Thus, women not only filter themselves, coat themselves with makeup, etc., but they also have a massive volume of photos to sample from, whereas men have a couple. What you see on men’s profiles tends to be 50% of all photos of them in existence, other than a passport or drivers license photo.
The range of ideas and opinions you see in this comment section is actually kind of inspiring. Very interesting to see this discussion actually going somewhere.
Well hopefully to the truth, cause there are some really misguided people here...
@@ImAMenace i agree. Internet comment sections may seem like it contains smart people, but just because theyre articulate, doesnt mean that they are right.
FORREAL men gotta come together and do better
I'm a youth counselor and familiar with anti-male driven abuse in my culture. When he says men in some of these groups think women are attracted to anti-social behavior it clicked with what I see in my work. Young men are so accustomed to anti-male rhetoric, hostility and outright abuse (to varying degrees), that being treated this way becomes completely normal to them. In the day to day subtleties, the default is to be deprived of empathy, not have opportunities to share what they experience without being mocked or people getting angry, especially if they have any suffering, barriers or struggle. Their moms, female teachers and girls in school will immediately make it a competition of victimhood. This can get mixed into other social situations, and young men get contradictory messages. A girl might actually like them, but at the same time rejects his care and kindness. If it is normal to be treated with hostility (anti-social responses), then young men treat this as the default in general without any comparison otherwise. Additionally, if the girl they like or female friends actually treat kindness as a sign of ulterior motives, or hyper-sexualize the man as a predator with nefarious intentions, then it's easy for him to conclude women don't like kind, caring, vulnerable behavior.
I lead with sex only
best way I've ever heard that out friend.. or basically, it's hot if chad does it, not hot when a sub 5 male does it.. simple as that.. and I've been on the chad side of life, more than the invisible side.. being 40 and all, I'm older..
@@Skelstoolbox really that's sad
As a girl, I'm so happy someone is not scared of admitting that many women today, like their mothers and teachers, will use victim cards and and use victimhood as competition. I have no idea how to do it how they do, and frankly its extremely intimidating and makes you feel guilty, including me. I personally hate that comparing privileges mentality thats very common nowadays. Everyones got privileges, that's just the way the world works, it's about not taking them seriously and building your life with whatever you've got.
Giga chad as well as the chad in the virgin vs chad meme is an exaggeration of masculine traits. I am not surprised that women don't find such exaggerations attractive. after all many men don't find women with huge Dolly Parton utters attractive nor do most men find Nicki Minaj style "Chicken Run" hips attractive. Kind of re assuring that humans are still attracted to human shaped humans.
Exactly what I was thinking. It’s a weird thing that’s been going on for the last 30 years and progressively getting worse. The exaggeration of sexual features. Lips, hips, breast…and now men have been caught up in this trend.
@@stevenbragg85 Yeah, the number of bodybuilders that (to my straight male eyes and brain that thinks with fairly intuitive insight) have built their bodies to be as big and muscular as possible in a way that is disproportionate to unchangeable features about the human body like head size, foot size, etc. and just look grotesque is wild. It's the male version of eating disorders for sure. No one in a tribal setting is going to get that jacked. As such, it's uncanny to our evolutionary minds, just as a woman with impossibly smooth skin (makeup), impossibly red lips (makeup), impossibly large assets (implants, fillers, and endocrine disruptors in the environment) and impossibly thin frame (eating disorder made possible by a sedentary lifestyle) seems gross to men. In my mind, the best you're going to look is from a very healthy lifestyle with maybe a few hygienic and cosmetic modifications like eyebrow threading your unibrow or braces for your teeth ruined by modern foods. Aggressively take care of your health for three years and see how you look. Hell, I bet if we took identical twins and had one live a very healthy lifestyle while the other lives the average American lifestyle, the healthy one will have better developed features, a more attractive face and bone structure, taller height, better skin, etc. despite having the exact same genetics. Screw blackpillers, there's truth to you being "capped" but a lot of their failure starts with a bad lifestyle and is multiplied from there. Especially the young ones. Your body is still growing as a teen, you can boost HGH through diet, sleep, and exercise and come out of puberty much more attractive. How many male models ate only junk food in their teens, played videogames and no exercise, and got terrible sleep? I doubt it's very many.
Eh I think Nicki pretty hot tbh
What women Say they like is different than what they Think they like. But neither of those are predictive of their actual behavior. So there's that.
A female will only gaslight a unatractive man if he ask’s questions about her mateing habits or desires. That is tell him what he want’s to hear= that she will love him for who he is ( like his mother). And not for his sexual market value. Females are created with less mussel/strenght, but higher social intelligence. They are created to survive and to pass on genetics. And harvest genetics that has a high odds of survival. Finding a sexy man ( good health), a man with social connections, skills, resources, leader of men or part of the many traits they look for. It’s never a « one answer», they want it all 😂. But in the short term mateing game look’s and abillity to flirt/social skills/game= 95% of importance. Long term mateing strategy is a different story
Correct, women usually want the complete opposite of what they say.. That's not only with looks but personality traits as well.
Two problems with "becoming more of what you are" 1. What is the likelihood you will find someone that is looking for that? 2. What is the likelihood that it will be someone *you'd* find attractive?
The alternative is not being yourself and who likes fake people anyway?
@@Dian_Borisov_SW Its a weird dynamic lol. Cant go the full Kardasian route
Move to a big city to find someone. You'll have much much better odds. If you already live in a big city move to another possibly bigger one. Move countries if you have to.
A single response to both questions: The probability is slim, so continue your search. The advice you ought to consider: Achievement with women = Authenticity level multiplied by the number of women you genuinely interact with. In simpler terms: Step away from your comfort zone and begin engaging with more women, communicate openly, and filter through them. Yes, many won't be compatible, but that's just life. Some men are genuine but only interact with a handful of new women annually, then wonder why they haven't been successful in the past year.
It's a slim likelihood, but you can increase your chances by being in places where likeminded people congregate. Expend your social circle(s) and work towards being highly regarded within these groups. Even then, it might take a while. Took me until the age of 29, which was painful, but it's one of the best things life has to offer and thus worth every lonely minute of waiting.
One theory I have is that men have features that intimidate and keep other men at bay, helping establish and order among men. These features help keep a mate, but are not necessarily attractive to the other gender. Facial structure as he explained, other dudes look at that and think I cant compete with him. A woman might look at that and think "I prefer other features". It is these two that I think are often conflated.
I agree.
Well said
This may be why guys like me like the Michele Trachtenberg type and not the Hayden Panettiere type. We like girl next door type because they may be less of a catch to the chad types, at least in our lizard brains.
@@stefanmatton8778 Let's take massive trapezius muscles as an example. Intimidating to other men, but not neccessarily attractive to women. Extremely pronounced brow ridge, intimidates other men, but may look too brutish to other women. Strong Calve muscles won't intimidate other men, but are attractive to women. Many such cases!
Very good point
What woman say they like, and what they actually like are completely different things. They can talk as much as they want about wanting a good family man, but if you observe the real life, majority of them are dating the completely opposite kind of men.
Hmmm... You raise an interesting point. Now I have two questions. In the dating pool I wonder what percentage of the available men are actually family men? Also would most women be able to recognize the traits of a family man when they see him?
@FenwickChick If she doesn't put out by the third date, there will be no fourth date. Some women just like to eat out for free.
@Fenwick Chick I see you around here, and while you're always civil and articulate, we don't always agree. Gotta say you're 1000% spot on with this tho. Sex is watered down to an unbelievable degree these days. Sex should be shared with people who are incredibly serious about each other. You can't simply decouple the process of procreating and the pair bonding hormones/processes associated with it. The sexual revolution is a failure
@@FenwickChick Me. I paid out a lot of money to women who weren't going to put out. After a while, you just realize you're being an idiot and they're deliberately exploiting you. You're getting different replies because you're talking to different men. When everyone is replying the same, those are NPCs.
@@FenwickChick Jesus, how much time a day do you spend commenting on KZhead? Maybe try a new hobby? Plant an herb garden? Take up model railroading?
Women will lie about a man’s attractiveness if he matches or exceeds her own level of attractiveness just because she knows that she will have to constantly compete for his attention. Which is why some women find average features attractive. deep down she still finds the gigachads attractive, they just don’t want to have to compete for them. Women want men to always be in the position of competing for their attention/loyalty and never the other way around. What men they find attractive is heavily based on this metric.
the latest man i fell in love with and felt attracted to, i complimented the things i appreicated about him. His teeth, eyes, arms, shoulders etc... I did not lie or downtalk him. I wanted to lift him up and boost him. You write like you got it all figured out but i think you don't.
@@Zelanias why would you try to put on a shoe that you know doesn’t fit you?
But there are handsome and hot men, who are dating and married, at times to women who are average and who other men wouldn’t look at twice.
From my experience this is very true nowadays. I think women actually lack of confidence in Anglo countries. Speaking of the UK and US. They will sleep with the really handsome guy but they insecurities will always stop them committing to someone better looking than them. They desire them strongly. But love and desire can be 2 different things. I myself am above average good looking and I seem to find it easy to sleep with women and a lot of times on more than 1 occasion. So many also have BFs. Usually not as good looking as them, sometimes drastically not. Sometimes what a woman loves and sexually desires are 2 different things. Just most women are unaware of this, lie about it to sound nice or keep it secret. But having been to France, lived in Portugal and been to Vienna recently . Women really appreciate Male beauty and handsomeness. I found them less nervous, far more confident and more affectionate. The Anglo world is infected by hateful feminism I feel that creates a power dynamic.
@@FenwickChick clearly he is not
Thank you, Chris! Your monologue in the middle was spot on.
Brilliant Interview!! Great podcast, I really enjoyed this!! Thank you!!
The 'love/hate' is a real thing. They have done testing/studies with newscasters or media personalities and this is verifiable. People will of course watch who the love, but they will also watch people they hate / can't stand.
I think the idea is to have an aesthetic instead of trying to be an all rounder and simultaneously accomplish nothing.
Literally the best take on Pick up on the interet, bruh hearing you say that was actually cathartic to me, God bless you sir!
Sometimes a woman can see a very handsome man and not give him any vibes because she may think he’s got too many options and she doesn’t have a shot at him even though she may find him to be her type and very attractive to her. It works both ways. Sometimes the good looking people don’t get as many approaches as some may think.
There are also women who aren't aroused just by chad being nearby. Rare - but luckily there are still good ones there
Extreme Copium
Cope
@@davidroche7685 coping with?
@@acausevic1 we say cope as many people like yourself just won't accept the fact or find it difficult to accept that women are visually discriminatory and very much so! They are much more looks visual than men and will downplay the fact that women treat attractive men better and that's not just dating but ordinary everyday life like schools, workplaces. Outdoor Public interactions, public services, checkout stands, bank clerk hatches the list goes on!Attractive men do get far better treatment by women in fact the treatment is almost night and day different! , more choosing signals, alot more choosing signals! women usually don't approach men but sometimes they just flat out approach the attractive man directly particularly in clubs and bars which never happens to the average man and certainly not Unattractive men. The fact is women treat attractive much better and give them more choosing signals which is basically a indirect approach in its own right! Women treat them better in interactions which explains why attractive men do far better with the women. For Unattractive men it's the complete opposite of this, dirty looks of disgust when you get in their visual field , cold or disinterested interactions, condescending rude or been ignored In interactions. No choosing signals whatsoever.
You are quickly becoming my favorite person to listen to
What women are attracted to depends on where they are in their cycle. The optimal guy is the one who balances both the masculine and feminine where she always finds delight in the fact that a singular individual can embody her entire universe.
You men complicate things too much it has nothing to do with that it has to do with empathy & kindness. Most guys are just assholes cause they seem to be conditioned to this or they just see women as things and treat relationships as a transaction. It's not hard but none of you men seem to get that!
@@restrelax4536 Looks (including height) are way more important than empathy and kindness. A short and ugly guy who is kind and empathic will never get a girl that can also have a handsome tall guy. That's a universal fact even though women deny it because they either lie or are self-delusional.
Height is overrated. It does boost attractiveness however. Handsome men irl are super rare. Most men irl are normies
@@Looksmaxxedat41 Cope, height is number2 priority after face atractivnes.
And you know because,you are a woman?
As an engaged woman I very much agree with that. Back when I was dating my type was "skinny and smart" and everything else was very varied.
I am telling what you wanted.... you wanted a tall, amazing bone structure face,.good wig like hair, lean athletic muscular build
Theehee my type Thehee, a womans type is allways the square angular jaw, square chin, low squarish hairline and tall.
I'm quite, very soft spoken, and very introverted. Though, I do have the capability of being extroverted in the right circumstances. Not every woman is attracted to me, but the ones who are, they're *very* attracted to me. What Rollo would call "genuine burning desire." I've been rejected by average looking women that I asked out. I've also had women who I never would have thought I had a chance with chase after me. This idea that ALL women are into some loud mouthed "alpha male" like Andrew Tate is just absurd. I know for a fact that's not true, because if it were then I would have no success with women. Some things always hold true, like confidence. All women are attracted to confidence. But you can be quite or stoic and still show the same level of confidence as an extroverted man. Other personalities traits, it really just depends on the woman. I know this is a strange concept to some men, but not every woman wants the same thing in a man. But in my opinion, the absolute most important personality trait to have to be attractive to women is BALLS. Women want a man with balls. You don't have to be extroverted, or cocky, or loud. You definitely don't have to be a jerk to women. You can be kind, generous, and empathetic. But *only* if you have balls. Hope this helps someone, good luck🙃
This. I'm the same and I've had very similar experiences. Define "with balls" because that's kindof a broad term. Also, I will add that your chances of attracting women exponentially increase as you're a part of a community. This is why college is usually the place men meet the most women and have the most dating success. Once you graduate however, community is tough to find and it gets harder
Great post Jay! very well written and I agree with you. No woman wants a push over they say they want nice guys but with balls should be the end of that statement. Knowing when to stand your ground and defend a ladies honor or call them out on something that is wrong I feel like they would respect you more. But what do I know my wife and I are so rocky probably headed to divorce land soon.
Agree.
@@bartsullivan4866 It's sad to hear you say that. (from one who's been there) but I really think that when you get married, not just in a "relationship", you really have to want to make it work and that can mean making major modifications in YOUR outlook and, obviously, in hers. I think that going into a relationship, almost by definition, means that you can leave it. Not a good way to start, but a sure way to finish. Perhaps we're all now encouraged to expect some kind of easy partnership that will just come right by itself. I know it takes two to tango, if that's not too gauche a remark. You have to give a lot, both of you do.
Wow, I'm kind of like you.
I’m not a gold digger. My boyfriend makes $19/hr when I’m getting paid way more. But what I find sexy is his work ethic. Because it shows me he’s a dedicated person who devotes himself to his family.
Basically, you like his potential upward mobility. He is also less likely to cheat and give his potential higher resources to someone else.
@@RhetoricalMuse Good, let her value loyalty. Better than all the women who have their hoe phase till their late 20s and THEN look for a loyal man.
@@RhetoricalMuse 😂
@@RhetoricalMuse they don’t even realize it lmfaoooo
I agree. My dad never earned alot of money but he'd have fought a lion to keep me safe if he had too. He was the strongest man I ever knew. When me and my partner got together he had 20k of debt, we cleared it together, as a team. Now my daughter has a fantastic father to look up to like I did. He's not a big earner, and will never be, but he's a big dad. Solid, like mine was.
"Become more of what you are" great quote
Men project their own masculine ideal views onto what women find attractive. You see this with gym culture a lot. And the other element is, what’s most valued is that which cannot be worked towards.
@@TuscanBrick fully agree. The nails, excessive makeup, lip fillers and butt implants are a huge turn off for me. As a brotha, the wigs is also something I DO NOT like, natural hair is mandatory. As far as your list, you nailed it. And it goes in that order too. You need to also cross the threshold for the genes/appearance for your character to be considered most of the time. That’s partly why in this world of rising physical standards, more and more men will be left alone.
@@TuscanBrick when you are younger, just having the first 2 combined with charisma is enough to do very well. You don’t necessarily need to be of high character, just high charisma. Third element becomes increasingly important with age.
@@TuscanBrick Let’s not forget fake eye lashes, hair extensions, and horribly overdone eyebrows.
@Fenwick Chick It’s a location/community thing. In my community + age group, the overdone look is extremely common. Not an IG thing.
@Fenwick Chick I don’t think we ever said most women look like that, same way most men don’t look like bodybuilders. The idea is that people often project what THEY would find attractive onto the opposite gender.
*There are two different variations of attractiveness.* 1. *_Attractiveness as a subjective, rarely objective tool to rate someone's appearance._* 2. *_The individual attractiveness to a person (Which is exclusively subjective)_* *The first version of attractiveness can be influenced and changed by yourself, even though you cannot change other people's preferences.* *The second version cannot be influenced, is set in stone, and is the key to a relationship.* *_So improving your attractiveness can be beneficial for your confidence but that is not a requirement to find love or form a relationship._* _Thanks for sharing the Wisdom, as always_
Merry Christmas!
Symmetry is the most appealing as it implies health
A symmetric face also can be super boring.
Be yourself. If they don’t like it they can get lost. Nothing is worth a life of disingenuousness
That's terrible advice. If you're a loser who is unemployed fat and passes 24/7 on tiktok. "Just be yourself" is not going to change a dime. You have to aim to be the best version of yourself, not be stagnant.
@@emanuelfer456 why would you want to help people who dont want to help themselves? you're basically ruining the genepool with this
Agreed, good advice Emanuel! @@emanuelfer456
Just be yourself bro
@@emanuelfer456 It's not terrible advice at all. Being yourself is exactly what you're meant to be, and you're meant to get better at being yourself. It will also attract women who are into you and not your fake persona. That mask eventually slips. Attempting to be a douchebag like Andrew Tate is not only going to scare women away, they're also going to see right through your facade. You can ONLY be yourself.
Good video
I’d like to give a shout out to the CRT screen in the background. Although unplugged, still present. 📺
Only pick up artist I ever liked was David DeAngelo. He encouraged cocky humor and having a general playful attitude. It wasn't about mind tricks, just being fun and authentic.
So basically lean into being yourself and hope you meet someone who appreciates and loves who you are
That has ALWAYS been the answer.
Not exactly. The world is full of lonely people who are just being themselves and others just dont find those people attractive. There are traits that are considered attractive. Majority of women don't find nerds attractive. But vast majority of women find smart guys attractive. But nerds are smart guys - then why are they not higher on the dating poll ? Coz they have other traits that are considered unattractive. Like lack of social skills , dont know how to dress, too skinny/fat. ect.
@@lorrilewis2178 No. If that was the case everyone would be in a relationship and the hot/smart/successful men would have the same dating options as the poor, video game playing fat guys. And that's obvs not how the world works. Just think about your best looking female friend and whats the pool of guys she have the option to choose from vs your uglies female friend.
@@alexforce9 You act like no poor, fat, video gamers are not in relationships. This is not true at all. Many absolutely are. Some of the ugliest and fattest people I know are getting the most pussy. We just don't hear about it because it's not all over the internet in the same way looxmaxing and PUA content is. You have been conditioned to think only the best will find love through the content you see online, and that's not how the world works.
Can we trust a man that doesn't put away his Christmas tree ? 🤔
Can we trust a man who is too dumb to understand this wasn’t filmed yesterday.
Interesting 🤔
Where's the body
😂😂 this is a short from a interview a few months ago, close to Christmas.
@@viviennedunbar3374 it was still after Christmas.. wasn't it?
Did you account for birth control? Women on birth control value lower testosterone men. Basically more effeminate men. Jordan Peterson mentioned it years ago
Its good for soyboyz
But the range probably wasn't that wide. Hardly any women are attracted to giga-Chad no matter where they are in their cycle. Giga-Chad is literally horrifying.
@@lorrilewis2178 Yup. My only advice would be - try to stay away from online dating, and definitely away feom clubbing women, also expand your social circle.
Gorgeous man again ❤
This is one reason why famous people can get women. Obviously not only so u have money and fame but also ur face and personality is exposed to a significantly large number of women. It is a numbers game after all
@6:25 is the great analysis and will save a lot of men a lot of time.
Mr.Chris you are doing amazing job,i am 17 year old and i am getting very usefull stuff from your chanel.
You do also know/follow Jordan Peterson, I pressume. If not, look him up. His videos from when he was a teacher are gold - free education, "just" without the papers.
Good
@@CONEHEADDK thank you brother
@@lukaghostx8218 i second the Jordan Peterson recommendation. I have been watching and reading his stuff for the last 6 years. he will go down as one of the greatest thinkers of our time.
@@burtReynolds3 thank you man,i am really having hard time right now choosing my future and podcasts and other peoples experiences really help me,my parents want other and i want other this just svcks
Confidence, 110% responsibility for self (aka never ever blaming others for their problems even if they are justified... it's just weak and pathetic), ability to self reflect, effort for health and finally, not addicted to disgusting, mind destroying porn. that's all.
Lol. What if you're not addicted and you enjoy watching porn?
I think confidence is genuinely being sure of yourself, 100% okay in your own skin, and having a joy for life that's contagious. This is rare. I myself am struggling to find this.
Nope. No porn. It's a weakness.
@@maewest68 you shouldn't be proud of enjoying that. this is a disgusting industry.
@@kateredhead7334 If you need to avoid a thing like the plaque, because you might get addicted. The weakness isn't the thing, it's you.
It's an intertesting subject. 25 - 30 years ago I was broke, screwed-up, and my life was a complete mess. Women were throwing themselves at me and I couldn't understand why as I felt unworthy. Now I'm financially secure, emotionally healthy with a strong personal identity, and have every aspect of my life in order, it's very hard to meet someone I want to spend time with. That said, I know I don't give away as much personal information as I once did, and I'm no longer 'vulnerable' or represent a 'fixer-upper'. Or maybe because I have so many platonic female friends I don't feel any need to commit and give off an entirely different energy?
I think with your situation it depends on what age group you were at. The biggest thing I’d be interesting in is how many of these women did you actually follow through with ? Girls in their 20s will flirt all day long but if you try to ask them out will flake. So you might look back and think you missed all these opportunities but maybe it wasn’t like that .
You're old and bald. Reality check
25-30 years ago we did not have social media and a man had to go out to socialize. Your success with woman was due to woman not caring that you are a success at such a young age. Young men are not the expected to have money or their own house. Society has changed as well with dating apps.
If a man does not have something interesting to say in a conversation and he is mean to others, could be the best-looking guy in the universe... I will not have eyes for him.
That's common sense,
0:40 I am interested in that survey about a chad. What the question was specifically. Because i am sure if you`d ask men, is that guy attractive to Women. It would be different from "is that guy attractive?"
Over all attractiveness is somewhat of a marker but women often will be attracted to a guy that they feel other women will be attracted to i.e a man of value on the market. This is just one aspect of many though, nothing in it'self is definitive unless she just likes you for you, which does happen also.
what about men's attraction to women, do you have any idea of that aswell? I would love to hear :D
@@Zelanias Hi. Well, as far as I know and can attest to as a man I will say that men are more visually stimulated and look for youthful physical features and beauty. After those basics I would say it largely depends on the man because carnal instinct is only a part of the overall equation in modern society. So many different personality types! Personally I will say that women who radiate feminine energy with comfort instead of being a nasty butch feminist will help women if they are looking for a confident guy who knows himself in today's world and also has the relevant masculine energy which he uses for good. Always tonnes more to say. Lol.
The “controversial” look is the same thing that Chrysler market research discovered about car styling/design the mid-90’s. Cars with an average rating of 7, but almost no 9 or 10 ratings, and few 1 or 2 ratings, would be much less desired than cars with a 7 average, but 20% or more rating them 9 or 10, and 10-20% rating them less than 3.
thank you for sharing this!
How on Earth did Chris get so articulate when he speaks? If anyone can provide answers, and something I can do right away, I would be very grateful!
He reads a lot. I know a lot of readers who can speak very well
@@TheVoltaire1 Okay dokey. That’s where I’ll start 👌
I also heard him mention that he went to a voice coach or this people that help you speak with confidence etc. It really helps to record yourself having a conversation to become aware of your habits and gradually change them. To delete the "hum, like, kind of" when they're not necessary
NGL the goatee stopped me clicking at first.....but was actually very interesting 😅
What percentage of those women were on birth control?
Omfg I was just about to say that! That’s an extremely relevant question.
This is a great question. Every study on attraction should control for HBC. Will ask Alex if he accounted for it
The number i can find is 12.6% of women use the pill, this is in america
@@sithraeil I think their preference changed when they found they were pregnant.
@@sithraeilyes, and said change did not occur with those on hormonal birth control.
Idk if I can take advice on attracting women from someone with such a beard or whatever that is
pubes**
How you make her feel... That's literally it. That's the secret. That's all you need. Appearance is good for initial attraction. Confidence is beneficial for asking her out and keeping the chemistry flowing. But none of that matters if she doesn't like who you are.
the closet and old tv in the background reminds me of my childhood. Is this guy steaming from his parents home?
Respect if he is
I wonder if the research on the women who didn't think the giga-chad facial features were attractive, were checked whether they were on the pill. Women who don't ovulate are apparently attracted to more effeminate men, whereas women who do are more attracted to the faces with the classic masculine features.
As an ovulating woman I will give you my n=1 opinion that giga chad is not attractive at all. The only redeeming factor in his face are the teeth+lips and even those don't look so great because of that oversized chin and oddly straight jawline.
As a woman I promise you that not a single straight woman walking this earth is attracted to effeminate men. Not one. A woman might say he’s “cute”, but she’s saying that in the same way she’d mean that a puppy is cute or a baby is cute.
The giga-Chat guy is just awful to me. I don't know many women who are attracted to that look.
What men need to understand is that women are fundamentally afraid of them. Like all members of the animal kingdom are fundamentally afraid of other animals that are much bigger, stronger, faster, louder, and tougher. We're all fundamentally animals and men understand perfectly well how they feel around much bigger, stronger men. But for some reason that all goes out the window when it comes to understanding that women are afraid of men. Not just because men tend to be much less emotionally sensitive and hurt our feelings pretty regularly, but also they can and often do physically dominate us. Women like men that are masculine enough to protect them, but not so masculine as to be scary. Women associate overly masculine men with too high levels of testosterone, and that's scary. I imagine the preference differences arise from the environment that a women is raised in, dangerous environments where women feel more threatened would cause them to be attracted to more masculine looking men whom they believe will be better able to protect them. So my theory is women from more economically depressed areas of high crime like more masculine looking men. I'd bet money on it. It's also why women like bad boys. They think bad boys are better able to protect them, they just don't suppose that they might need protection FROM the bad boy. It's usually a rookie mistake for women, made when they are young. Which is why bad boy appeal is an immature thing that usually wears off for most women.
A spot on assumption. Unexpectedly being face to face with a very muscular tall gym bodybuilder would instinctively make me afraid, even a Jason Mamoa type etc. Im also a person who can't help but smile at someone who smiles at me, even if I have no idea what they are smiling about or even at the person behind me!
@non1593 Exactly, I was thinking of a metaphor that might help men better understand how women feel and I came up with this story. Imagine you, as a guy, just bought a brand new sports car, something you'd saved your whole life for and you take it out for a test drive. A warning light comes on indicating that there's a problem with one of the tires, so you pull over to check it out. As you're standing by your car, a guy pulls up and gets out and he is much bigger, taller, and stronger. He never takes his eyes off the car. As he is staring he says, 'nice car', but not exactly to you, sort of to the air. He doesn't appear to be aware of you as a person standing there. Would you, as a guy, A. toss the guy the keys and say, 'hey, why don't you take her out for a spin.' B. Offer him a ride. or C. Get the hell out of there as quickly as possible fearing for your life, wondering whether he's gonna steal your car. So in conclusion, women don't like strange men admiring their 'cars'. If you talk to them, talk to them as people and leave her 'car' completely out of the conversation. And if she gets to know you and trust you, she might just take you for a ride, or toss you the keys to her 'car'. I hope this helps men understand that women are afraid of them and they don't like being looked at or spoken to as if they we 'things' that arouse lust, unless they know and trust the guy. Then the feeling might be mutual. But until a women feels safe, she's not gonna feel anything related to lust - she's afraid.
Everything you said is right on. Most women will not like giga-Chad and the only women I've ever seen go for bodybuilders types, are women who grew up in poverty or low income or in dangerous places.
@@cynthiajohnson9412sheesh... Imagine being THIS unaware of your own darker sexuality and how it works, IMAGINE.
Yeah, life history theory backs this up. Studies too. Essentially women from lower SES prioritise dominance and physical strength moreso.
Oh, I am not saying that many guys did not learn in authenticity through pick up. Might take away, however, was becoming the best version of myself, and becoming authentic and aligned with that person. Even neurolinguistic programming was a tool to further that cause as opposed to an authenticity.
What id like to know , is what do the woman who found him attractive looked like vs the ones who didn’t. I think that’s a better option indicator. If 10 girls who are hot liked you vs 50 girls who aren’t hot dislike you kind of thing.
Giga Chad is supposed to be an exaggeration and not an ideal. Why is it that every pseudo-intellectual on the internet gets this wrong?
I’ve been told I’m a 9 and it’s so hard for me to talk to women. I feel like despite being attractive they don’t care about me lol. It’s hard to talk to someone you don’t know especially when they are attractive. I have an interiority complex and I can’t help but think I am less than everyone else and they all know it
If people who you don’t know well and don’t want anything from you are repeatedly telling you are a 9 then I would take that as an objective assessment and mostly believe them.
Do you ask them what their opinion is of you? Doubtful strangers would mention that you are a 9 just of their own volition. You must be fishing for compliments
i can relate a lot with this. in my experience, most girls (or people) actually dont care about you. its not that youre wrong, its that you have to persevere through those failed dates and awkward convos until you meet someone you really click with. and youll learn more about yourself and gain confidence along the way. keep going 👊
Same. But also, who told you you're a 9? Was it unattractive women telling you this or was it other 9's? I've had some hot girls tell me I'm hot but mostly I've had unattractive women tell me
@@bramrhodesdouglas5861 The type of woman he want doesn't want a guy that's into anime.. Liberal gals like anime
Wow, was.looking forward to hear what he had to say but ended up hearing the interviewer talk the whole time.
Love how Chris asks a question, listen to the answer then comes up with a better answer and explanation to his own question! 😂😂😂😂😂
I bet Chris knows more than this dude about what women find attractive
Great.
in my opinion, you face Chris, could prove to be a great tool for researching the topic. You could try a survey showing your photo with longer curly hair next to a photo of you with your shortest cut hair. I believe you have some facial traits that are very masculine, your defined jaw line, dry lean cheeks, not a small nose, the eyebrows, but at the same time the eyes are not so symmetric and small (like the gigachad type). the long hair would "round up" a little those masculine features and I would bet that most women would prefer those photos
I don't give a rats backside what wmn in 2023 find 'attractive', i invest in myself and work on my purpose. I have ONE life and i'll live it the way i feel like it, not focus on society, women, religion, whatever the latest fad is. All of society can take a hike.
@Fenwick Chick As long as you're not hurting anyone, be authentically YOU. And, yes I've noticed, but a simple 'I'm flattered but I'm not looking' usually deals with that. I will never give up this freedom :)
From what I've heard, in most aspect at least, men and women prefer partners who are just a little bit more dimorphic than average. E.g., women would likely prefer a guy who's 6'2", but probably they don't want a guy who's 7'2". I'm actually surprised guys would think Giga Chad is genuinely attractive: he's a caricature of an attractive man.
A lot. They are often way off. Same with women to men. At the same time, it seems like some want people to have almost NO standards at all and when an issue gets raised, they are accused of wanting someone "impossibly perfect."
Guys pickup the idea of being a bit of a dick to women however I think that as long as the woman is not broken or toxic, they like men who are kind, interesting, and wholesome. However being kind does not mean being a doormat with no boundaries, it just means treating people right like a gentleman until the situation calls for you to not be a gentleman.
Confidence and family values.
🤣🤣😂 yeah ok…
'Family values' . .lol
LOL'ed T0P K£K
This all hinges on if you believe the answers you receive to your survey questions are truthful. Women have high levels of compassion and will avoid saying hurtful things
You have to pick a build & style that suits you and max it out. Funny/Frat Build: Pete Davidson, Nick Cannon Athletic: C. Ronaldo, Derek Jeter, Odell Beckham Jr Silicon Valley Tech Nerd Manual Laborer, Lumberjack, Farmer Cowboy Surfer Artist Business Executive, Doctor, Lawyer Gangster etc.
Or... you don't pick an archetype and you transvaluate the values of these sub cultures and become your own man with your own style, based on your own preferences?
I would never ask a guy with that beard this question and expect a useful answer.
Gigachad ain't attractive 'cause Women said so...yea,they said so. You watch what Women do,not what they say. I think We learned that by now.
Women find the same things attractive we do but they have more layers. Confidence is very attractive as is success. A guy who knows who he is and is comfortable in his own skin is attractive but a little time at the gym or on the road is not a bad idea. Little effort in the physical appearance goes a long way. Men are blessed in that we for the most part can do with a set of weights what they sometimes have to see a surgeon for and it's just a matter of effort.
Following words but not behaviour
We want what you do…honesty,integrity and not sweating the small stuff..as the basis..
The sexiest man in the world is the "boy next door" look, combined with intelligence. Often love men wearing glasses. Can't stand unintelligent men. Hate the hyper masculine or fake bodybuilder look or shallow brains. Like an average amount of muscles, but not over the top. I look for signs of kindness in the facial expression. Sense of humor. Not taking himself too seriously or being overly dramatic, yet has a direction in life.
Only mediocre women will say that.
@@jimj2683 I don't know what your emotional issues are, but hope you get help.
@@jimj2683 Only an incel would make such a comment .
Hey, that's me but I'm still chronically single. I do get a lot of looks, but I can't tell if that's attraction, fear, or confusion lol
@@PowerofRock24 Can't read faces?
One rule trumps them all: $$$$$$$$$ This trumps all other qualities.
There's what a woman says she wants then there's what she thinks she wants and finally, there is what she responds to
"Lean in being Mr. Guitar Player..." Thats it! As a young man (16 to 26) you want to be someone with a style. Guitar player, metal guy, surfer boy, DJ, skater etc. For all these guys there is women who're into them. Most dont like it, but some absolutely love it. When you get older you want to turn this down, become more mainstream and make good money. Being a 35 year old metal guy with long hair and band shirts is not very cool. It makes you look like you didnt develope. But at 18 it is.
It takes all kinds of people to make the world 🌎 go round
The VAST majority of women would pick Henry Cavill or Chris Hemsworth to sleep with (or date), instead of Jack Black or Steve Buscemi. Some women may claim otherwise, but their actions will show this to be true. From 2012 to 2017 I was subscribed to 8 dating sites. I chatted to 100+ women and went to dinner with 25+. They were 3's to 7's, 40 to 65, waitresses and janitors etc, including obese and unemployed. I'm 5'8", a 5 in looks, fit because I have a gym in my house, a good humor, average income, $1 Million Net Worth. NONE of the dinner dates turned into a relationship because every woman told me that I am not 6+ foot tall, I don't make $100k+, my car isn't expensive enough, my house isn't expensive enough. The Black Pill is RIGHT about what women find attractive.
This sounds right but I dont find it's true on dating apps.
Aren't modern adult females 2000-- 2020's a whole different breed? Under the strong influence of plastic, birth control, smart phones, post modern cultural ideologies, "dating apps", normalized porn, social media, Kardashian Kulture, single parent/divorced "is the normal" homes, daycare & peer raised in same- age school groups, & slow emotional dev't. ... Makes the natural work of a relationship 10X harder.
They're a dysgenic breed
@@vklnew9824 Great descriptor... Only, children don't raise themselves. One way or another, their parents fell short. Let's hope there's an awakening and a rebellion to return to responsible & strong quality parenting. 🤞🤞
Haven't watched the full episode yet, and was thinking "who is Chris asking this question to?" I did NOT expect the Devil's cousin lol. Jokes aside, you're killing it in tgat turtle neck/jacket combo Alex, looking forward to the full episode.
Full episode is already out, or there is a second one with Alex
Alex says, for every face they researched, there were some who found it very attractive, and some who found it very unattractive. My question is, do the people finding a certain face attractive fall into groups? That is, if you group all the people who like a certain face, does that group also agree in their ratings of other faces?
8:52 Chicago Face Database??.
As a female this man’s goatee is a turnoff
The gigachad meme is too exaggerated to me to be attractive.
Basically play to your strengths and recognise what you are going to attract. No point in going for a super model who cares about looks only if you’re the weebist neediest guy and out there who isn’t the top 1% of attractive ppl in the world. There’s nothing wrong with that if anything it’s better for you cuz you end up with someone who will actually love you for the traits you have.
The issue is women rate men more harshly than men do. So it's normal that women did rate gigachad less than the men. It would have been the same with every single guy.
As a woman, I want a man I'm sexually attracted to first...then he also needs to be kind and treat me well. Doesn't help if a man is kind and treats you well if there's no physical attraction to begin with.
"Doesn't help if a man is kind and treats you well if there's no physical attraction to begin with." As one of those men, I can confirm.
It’s all good and well saying that but that’s not really helpful just vaguely saying “somebody that you’re sexually attracted to”.
@@z-rex6068 attraction can be subjective...but I'd say the men I was attracted to had handsome facial features. Current partner has very strong browbone, chin, a full beard. he has nicer lips and eyebrows than me! he kinda looks like a caveman. i guess my type is caveman style. he's not very muscular or big, but has a nice v shaped back. even with no big chest muscles and a little belly, he still looks athletic enough, not muscular. oh, and he is very hairy. weird, but i love all the fuzzy body hair. caveman style. lastly, he smells good to me. i guess that's the chemistry and hormones you can't control much.
@@z-rex6068 Translation - just be a chad bro
I'd be fascinated to know how those women would respond based on where they are in their menstrual cycle. Those around ovulation would have different desires in appearance than those about to have their menses.
wow i didnt know that
I have my own theory, the most attractive men to women are the guys who are slightly androgynous. They have both masculine and feminine balance (indicating healthy hormones and genres). Also have very dimorphic bodies (broad shoulders, strong arms, height, and slim waist). Think Francisco lachowski or Alain delon.
I agree with this. Hyper masculinity can be very off-putting and intimidating. Unless the woman is HIGHLY insecure and needs extra security, it's unlikely she would want Giga-Chad. Many girls do like the 'pretty boys', as long as they don't have the effeminate energy to match. Hell, look at the Kpop scene. All those girls are rabid for those boy bands. Attraction is only one small part of relationships and love anyway. It only matters for initial interest. The rest is carried by personality and how you make her feel.
9.5 out of 10 men know extreme masculinity isn't attractive to women, no women want "a real man" until they hit 40s, in their 20s, they overwhelmingly want the cute boyish ones. Men want to look hypermasculine for themselves, to achieve this image for themselves, or to seek validation from other men. I got this 22 year old kid at my workplace, he looks like 18, good looking, 6'2, has shy smile, quiet, got attention from girls every time we go to a bar or even just a cafe. He's started to hit gym, and became interested in bodybuilding, I told him girls weren't into bodybuilders, he said yeah I know, it's a man thing. I know what he's doing, he wants to become more confident.
Girls are def into fit men. Maybe not in your circle the lame anime chubbies circle
Yea -- maybe he needs the army and male mentorship actually. That is what we all need instead of Bodybuilding/steroid use - etc etc etc bla bla bla
If that isn't what women want, then why are they always blathering on & on about how much they want exactly that?
Well here's the thing. I forgot which podcast this was from. But isn't it that the men who get laid the most aren't the ones who are the most attractive to women, but those deemed most scary by men.
thats interesting, could be some truth to that. the hard nuts get the women. i worked in a prison and there were hard men all around. they were convicted dealers and just general waste men. when you had visit days off so the inmates could see their partners and family, the girlfriends they had were STUNNING. id have no chance. i thought to myself, what the fuck is happening here ?
It’s true, many women have very particular preferences for men. Meaning, a guy could be a 6 to most women girl but be an 8 a few. And that makes a huge difference. Depressed and Nihilistic men (black pill) will tend to ignore this as it suggests that they could appeal to specific women if they tried to find them.
Interesting theory. I got depressed and black pilled while I was doing what youre suggesting for a decade straight with no results. Got much happier when I gave that up.
@@xraceboyex Everybody is different. My experience is that some women go wild for me and others could care less. I obviously focus my attention on the ones that do show interest.
damn
That's not a goatee. It's a face handle
Each woman is different when it comes to what kind of man they find attractive.