Why Subordinating Your Ego Shows Confidence - Jocko Willink
2020 ж. 22 Қаң.
289 856 Рет қаралды
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@jockowillink @echocharles
Excerpt from JOCKOPODCAST 210
Join the conversation on Twitter/Instagram:
@jockowillink @echocharles
Excerpt from JOCKOPODCAST 210
My most recent boss loved to humiliate and shame people. He called me into his office one time and was berating me because I was disorganised. I decided to completely lean into it and told him "yes, I've struggled with being disorganised my whole life. What do you do? What pointers can you give me?" He didn't even really answer. Instead, he was visibly intimidated by me the rest of that day.
🤟🤟🤟
Well played sir
Hahahaha😂
I’m dead 😂
The ego is afraid of the unknown. Become comfortable with the unknown and you will subordinate it.
So how would you suggest to get comfortable with it? Cause deep insight there is always some kind of fear of the unknown, because the unknown could be good but also it could be not good for you, even crush the life and world you built up for yourself and the people around you. Practically speaking
@@TobiasLA that's exactly the fear you want to be comfortable with. You have no idea what could happen. I could literally die any moment from anything. That seems like an irrational fear to have but some people actually have that fear of dying every moment. Be comfortable with the fact that everything in your life will dissolve. Including the world you've built yourself and the people that surround you. There is freedom in this realization.
zachie by facing it again and again. Then letting it go. It’s just in the mind. I know that it’s not who I am
I really liked the line "the ego is reactive armor", it was similar to my own "the ego is a threat detection system: if you identify with a threat detection system, you will always feel threatened." The ego is what is constantly supplying judgement values as a sort of instrument readout, "I like this, I don't like that, they like me, I don't like them..."
@@thetalantonx Dude that hit home for me. Very accurate metaphor. It's like a repeating assessment of the same threat. You try to rationalize it, try to get ahead of it by working out the ways in which it can manifest (the ways an imagined interaction will play out), but it's an endless, agonizing loop because you cannot actually predict what will happen.
Because ego seeks validation. Humility already has it.
Miss Annie, I've only just now seen this comment, 2 years later, but fucking THANK YOU. CHRIST that's a good damn line.
When you humble yourself and compliment other’s abilities, that is the ultimate demonstration of confidence, and as a byproduct, people will also want to be next to you and like you. But you have to do it genuinely, not simply because of the result of it, I believe anyway because then you could mistakenly be feeding into your ego further.
You're talking about the trap of False Humility there, not an easy mistress to outmaneuver. Doable, but not easy.
Well said guys. False Humility. Hmm
I started practicing this alot, especially at work and it definitely works. Has made me more successful at creating relationships with coworkers
@@elvatosquatcho It does take some practice, maybe in the beginning it might be a bit fake, but eventually it just turns into you seeing someone do something nice or positive and just calling it out.
TheBanjoShow I love this comment, perfectly said. Thank you!
I wish these podcasts were mandatory in middle school and high school.
I have 2 middle schoolers. Been applying these concepts about a month. My 8th grader, Whisky Tango Ryan, took extreme ownership of his meds & supplements 3 days ago at 6am in the kitchen. This stuff WORKS.
These types of podcasts wouldn't be allowed by the cancel culture
@David Crespo me too. But now you have found it, just be consistent with it now and keep listening to his videos and really take some reflection time and apply the teaching to your life. Consistency is key now. You Can DO IT!
Anything that’s great isn’t mandatory
they should be mandatory in families
Thanks Jocko. Your statement - 'subordinating ego is ultimate form of self confidence' summarizes whole of 8 minutes. Enough said.
M M I literally read this comment as he said those words lol
“There are two SUPREMES that lead reality: one is supremely positive and one is supremely negative, one is supremely willing and one is supremely unwilling, one is the supreme truth and one is the supreme lie, one is when you're wrong and you can't face it, and the other is when you're right and nobody else can face it.” - Luke Picco www.IRONCLADCONFIDENCE.com
“There are two SUPREMES that lead reality: one is supremely positive and one is supremely negative, one is supremely willing and one is supremely unwilling, one is the supreme truth and one is the supreme lie, one is when you're wrong and you can't face it; and the other is when you're right and nobody else can face it.” - Luke Picco www.IRONCLADCONFIDENCE.com
I paused it at 1:42 because I started reading comments, right on ! Thank for the simplified version! Lol!! Cheers!
Strength => self-confidence => 0 ego Good but nothing revolutionary
Ego will never get what it wants. There’s always something more that it will crave. Observe it. Don’t try to get rid of it. The observation of the ego is the subordination. You let go by become more in touch with your true nature. You can take action that will enhance your connectedness with your true self and dissolve the ego. Tell someone you appreciate them, say what you are grateful for out-loud ( this gives the ego no way to complain), give something away without expecting anything, realize that what you see in others is sometimes only in you and not in others, recognize your reactions, realize your power is found in the acceptance and surrender and not in resistance and fight.
Thank you so much honestly, and I mean that I always tried to understand why I couldn’t be confident and you made such a valid point.
As someone who is studying about the ego complex right now I can confirm this is 100% true, you are not the ego you are who observe the ego
ingloriousjavy99 happy to help
Lucas de Siqueira wild
It’s not easy, but much easier to subordinate ego when I reflect on the long game.
Overcoming your emotions and ego gives you energy and enthusiasm, because you just won battle with yourself
“Wow, this person is confident. This person knows they’re gonna win.” 🤙
Learned this concept as, "Sublimate the ego." The "stoop to conquer" lesson from Sun Tsu.
0:32 I've heard it said another way. "When life pushes you over, you push back harder."
Miyamoto Musashi described the same concept in his Book of Five Rings.
Thanks you 🙏🏼 I will read this tonight
Very Good Book recommendation!
T
@@sourgrapes5692 you
So awesome! The word of the week, & of the meaning I’m going to teach some young kiddos this week! Thank you.
Hell yeah it’s a feeling & Dave Berke you are 💯!!! Soooo much food for thought as always thanks!!! I get frustrated all the time at work & have to remind myself to not let my tone of voice reveal that I’m annoyed. It’s a delicate balance between “I need to speak to your manager” & “that was delicious thank you for being courteous, you sweet angel of the drive-thru” 😇😇😇
Ego & confidence go hand in hand...respect is where people get tangled up.
Love the lighting on these podcasts!
So true about ego, it may be hardest thing to overcome....most dont realize its even there or decisions are based off of it....it is always present and doesnt go away "lightly".....since I realized bout 20yrs ago it was huge force in my life I've battled daily against it
BAM! Sending this to someone I love right now.
that's right.... this has happened 4 times in my life... the opponent wil calm down when u react calmly to a deliberate act of provocation. he may resent it and feel that you are making fun of him by ignoring him, and he may try provoking you some more, but u just need to be neutral and show respect where it is possible. he will be unable to handle the fear and confusion in his own mind. body is never the source of fear or confidence, it is always the mind. keep your own mind confident, and play with his mind.
Extremely Powerful, God Bless you guys!!!
WOW! On New Years, this security guard at the club (man was built like a whole refrigerator) yelled at me for a trivial reason. I turned the other cheek and stated “understood” in the most tactful manner. I could see it in his eyes. It looked like he felt embarrassed, and guilty for yelling at somebody who replied in the utmost manner of respect. That’s all it took to get the other club patrons to see how much of a man-child he acted like
To be fair, you're at a club on new years, the security is probably stressed out expecting something to happen, can't blame em too much they get paid to keep people in line
So you said "understood" in the most tactful manner (very humble sounding) so people would see how trivial and childish he is? Sounds like you got some ego work to do still.
DrummerJacob I fail to see your point
DrummerJacob also, please re-read what I initially said.
@@chasemerritt1944 very true dealing with the public is very stressful you have so many attitudes and emotions in the crowd to deal with. Then you have the idiots that do not know how to conduct themselves in public.
Bro I am so pumped to read this book just the way you have hyped about it completely hypes me up 💪
Had several higher ups that would never admit if they made a mistake no matter how obvious it was.
Makes sense. I can remember growing up seeing people do this and feeling in some vague sense that they had transcended to a higher level, and also seeing people get defensive and feeling that it was somehow vaguely pathetic. I think I also may have used this when a superior at work was lambasting me for not doing something as he wanted it. I calmly clarified what he wanted and said [okay, I can do that]. He looked kind of startled and was a bit nicer after that.
Whell, this tells me that confidence in your abilities and knowing your limits and limitations while accepting that it’s perfectly fine to pass the lead to someone else (because you are in the background and can either step in or correct what might occur or because you trust the other person to do that job right or because the job that needs to bebdone is outside of your limits and limitations) keeps the ego at bay.
I need to listen to these guys more often. I wish I could be a better person than i am right now.
I never thought that being submissive would be such a problem until this season in my life. thank you for this message joko.
Yes I do need help to subordinate my ego.tired of it and I believe it will help me grow!
Great, great lesson, it took me 15 years to relearn this concept, somehow when I was young it was clear in my mind, then after years of conflicts and provocations I became reactive, finally I can articulate this idea. It's really powerful. Beautiful lesson.
Just two minutes into the video and I'm already like ''This is kind of like an ''anti bully defense system'', or something, lol'', without fighting with the bully nor letting it make you feel down. Totally tells you what the usual know it alls around you might be thinking. AWESOMEE!!! I just can't wait to order your book sir, I found it already on Amazon.
I'm reading this book now and it's so good. The first time I read it, I didn't really understood most of this. Then I had to work from a position of leadership. Holy shit, how many useful things this book has. Now I'm reading it the second time and I'm nodding my head with approval every other chapter.
Ego isn’t about being afraid of unknown , it’s about knowing it and being the best at it regardless of the outcome
Great content as always Jocko
WE all make mistakes, and its how we learn from them, that makes us great. Humans.
This lesson was exactly what I needed today. I'm wiser and more comfortable regarding a person that disrespected me now and will not let this affect me any further. Thank you for that!
Martin Wettig yes it is...learning that I don't have to be disrespect, slandered, and accused... better to just walk away, and find others who are supportive...@mom
We build up our ego over time, in layers. I think for every insecurity there is a layer of ego, so to remove the ego is to be secure. You may think you have a big nose(totally projecting here), and you may be right, but the more it affects you, the bigger the wall of ego you will erect. The sad thing is the buildup of insecurities thickens that barrier to eventually exclude everyone. You are left all alone in your struggle. A downward spiral effect and the ultimate path into the void awaits you.
I'm new to Jocko and I've watched him for the past month straight. This guy does not fucking miss!
Yo this is powerful! Im gonna listen to this everyday.
I’m reading your field manual right now, great read!
My ego gets destroyed everyday I step on the mats.
I agree w Echo, but giving a look or some other indication to the less confident person that says 'we both know you are being weak and I am choosing to let it slide' not only solidifies the confidence but makes it more difficult for the other persons ego to lie to the self about the situation, which will help them in the long run. That has been my experience. Thank you again gents.
I cant believe that im 24 yrs old and im giggling when Jocko said "why dont u mount me".
dont worry, im 48 and find it amusing too.
My man too many lessons here that help me with my life and relationships with loved ones
Yes, for sure...always works. They tend to recognize it instinctively and it produces a CONNECTION. And, got to have strength of ego first, then can be humble. Many people do not even have the first part of this equation. They are already in a kind of passive-avoidant state.
Subordinating your ego is the true definition of meekness. The Greek origin is praus, which is translated as “strength under control.” In ancient Greece, war horses were trained to be meek. Strong and powerful, yet under control and willing to submit.
I took my boss's feedback, ate crow, and came out a better person earning respect. Love your work, Jocko! ❤❤❤
Love his ego talks!! Legit!
I loved how you two laughed at the topic together 😂
Great book!
Excellent lesson, thanks
When it comes to the ego I like how people who are very different have similar comments and ideas on it. Eckhart Tolle for the days I need gentle reminders and then Jocko when I need a roundhouse kick to my ego 😅
This is golden props to you guys, this video would have saved me a lot of anger if i watched it 10 years ago. A video under 10minutes but truly live changing
"Let it go" Jocko doing the song from Frozen. He ain't wrong...
This is so true. Thanks
Best one yet
Honestly when echo talks I just look at his biceps.
The manly giggle to oneself when you check your ego to says it all.
Subordinate ego = Confidence. I feel that
I subordinating my ego is actually the ultimate form of self-confidence.
Jocko at 3:30 is the Jocko I live for. Yeaaaaaa .... yeaaaaaaaaaa
Great stuff!!!!
Funny. I read that line in the thumbnail, and I was more interested. And as they talked about it, made me feel good about myself. But also made me rethink other areas of my life I may need to apply it.
This entire video defines me to the core.
That is impressive!
Chuckled; jocko says to echo.. "that's OK why don't you mount me" that made me laugh. Immature humour but I got a laugh out of it. Love the man banter.
Have confidence
Great clip!
Thank you!
I just came from a podcast of John Rogan where they explain how Ego is connected to procrastinating and now hearing this podcast I learn something so important which is the same message the Bible has for all of us which is "what is true sin"? Which is selfishness all sin is selfish so.. this is what I learn every time you have a problem doesn't matter if it's with the world a friend, family members or between yourself etc.. CHECK YOUR EGO summit your ego let it go accept and act accordingly DON'T ever get mad at it because it's part of who you are and the last thing you want is self heathered (being a Christian works perfectly for me submitting my ego to this greater self call God)
THE BOOK is leadership strategy and tactics field manual. Maybe echo can pin this comment or put the book title/link in the description.
Found the book at Target and seen it around Walmart, Barnes and Noble, etc. $20 for a lifetime of knowledge is a steal.
Should I read the book?
Jocko is so wise...
In no way disrespectful, but ego... It is a word from psychoanalysis. I am an expert in the field. Ego is actually good... Freud was the first to use the word in the West. Ego is just what regulates you. Ego is the the eye for greater objectivity. super ego is the problem in our society because we cannot be free from our social programming. I see Jocko and Echo as guys with healthy ego... Having ego strength helps fight against confusion and negativity. So ego can be good...
Thos is a great social lesson I learned from sports as a kid
thank you so much
Confidence consists of two parts, one that comes from "know thyself" and one that comes from "know thy enemy". Someone who is confident without knowing "thy enemy" is called arrogant. Someone who is confident because he knows "thy enemy" is called a bully. Ego consists of two parts as well, a healthy one and a sick one. The healthy ego will always try to make you know yourself and improve while showing respect for the "enemy". The sick one will always try to make you know the "enemy" so you can exploit his weaknesses and thus not improving yourself. Keep your healthy ego alive and well, subordinate only the sick one. Then you will have true confidence but most of the times you'll never have to show it.
Andreas Mpintas, So acording to your explanation "Confidence" is a Bad thing because Arrogant peopel are toxic as fuck,and if theiy not arrogant then theiy Bullys wich is even worse considering bullying is a crime,Meanwhile your explanation of "the ego" implies that ego is something that is consisently a good thing,as it pushes you to improof yourself,also how is knowing the weakness of the enemy and exploiting it a bad thing?,we aren t talking about a friend or a co-worker or none-hostile peopel here,we talking about "the enemy" a enemy by definition is a person that wants to harm you,possible even kill you,how exactly is exploiting the weakness of a enemy,for exampel if another dude attacks you,and you know punching him into the guts to win the fight will work,is stoping you from improofing? if you want to improof as a fighter you go to boxing and other mma tournaments,but still if someone on the street attacks you with a knive then knowing that theiy biggest weakness is theiy eyes and they nuts can save your life,so i ask again: how is exploiting someones weakness a bad thing? if its a enemy then mercy is pointless,
You are wise.
I'm like that Jocko, my jujitsu has been my right fist, he has met up with many eye sockets when ego has jumped in my face, what Turning Blue has done to my ego along my path.
Exactly what I needed to hear 👍
Just go have kids and be a wife, wtf you doing here lol you're lost
The black and white is classy touch.
Jocks puts his mid vid ads at the end of the video. Confidence.
Oh wow I've been under the impression that the ego was everything and that I was weak but I do being real so subordinate my ego so been displaying Supreme confidence thinking it was weakness because boy do people get pissed off especially in group situations.
You see the ego projection in a handshake at times when some go to the extreme and try to crush the others hand or they’ll grab the fingers & not the palm.
Great job
Very good video, this is a way to kill the anxiety for tournaments too ! ;)
Is Jockos new book out on Audible ?
Kudos.
Amazing vid
Goggins!
David is a super inspirational dude. Him giving you shit is the best motivator to get out and get shit done.
👍🏾
No control when your out of control!
“There are two SUPREMES that lead reality: one is supremely positive and one is supremely negative, one is supremely willing and one is supremely unwilling, one is the supreme truth and one is the supreme lie, one is when you're wrong and you can't face it; and the other is when you're right and nobody else can face it.” - Luke Picco www.IRONCLADCONFIDENCE.com
O my god echo pretty good frame right there
Damn Straight.
Oh this video will trigger some egos lol
I checked my ego. It’s still there.
That's exactly what Jesus teaches, to submit your ego to the Lord and to be confident in God. When I didn't submit my ego to the Lord I was so much more afraid and weaker than I am now. Now I can say that I'm not afraid of the old situations that would scare me. Truth be told I don't know exactly how I will feel if I encounter those situations, but I feel confident with God and God always delivers.
I loved it! What book does this come from? #greetingsfromHolland
I don't know what is Ego.. I don't exalt mysel.. I do what I think is right.. I take responsibility for my behavior and actions..
Let me double down on this, if you don't mind; subordinate your ego, master your practice (or any similar vibe in that manner). Many people I know set their limits as their best, rather than as their worst. Think about it, those "guns"? "Strength". That intellect? "Smarts". What they can't push further, "Best". If you take the opposite, you're not putting Ego first, it's learning front and center, subordinating not just the mind, but the senses. Every master was once a disaster? More like every master remains a disciple.
I’ve never looked at Echos face!
come on payday, I need my book !
Thank you for this. I let my ego slip today, and I let a good girl get in the middle of it.
I love the multiple comments that say first
They never learned any of the lessons in this video XD
@@unclestone8406 First on KZhead, losers in real life :) I agree with the irony though.