In a future dystopian world where anything and everything has been banned, including nothing, one man has cloned himself in order to bring the enslaved global populace the innumerable things now outlawed that once brought them happiness, from aardvarks to zeros and everything & nothing in between.
And now, once again, after travelling through a rift, you find yourself at a void in a secret meeting with one particular clone that deals in Video Game Controllers (which are officially catalogued by the NWO as Contraband Material: Bugle-Head Coarse Thread Sharp Point Polymer Coated Exterior Screws. And in case you're wondering, those screws are catalogued as: Cyan).
00:00:00 Introduction
00:03:06 Imagine, if you will...
00:09:41 What You Have to Trade
00:14:17 ColecoVision Controller
00:22:07 Atari 2600 Controller
00:28:48 ColecoVision Super Action Controller
00:34:18 Coleco Adam Controller
00:39:31 Nintendo Entertainment System Controller
00:45:11 NES Zapper Gun
00:48:20 Sega Genesis Controller
00:53:21 Super NES System Controller
00:59:10 Nintendo GameCube Controller
01:05:36 Original Xbox Controller
01:10:25 PlayStation 4 Controller
01:15:37 Taking Your Order
Riftverse / Arkham Sanitarium 101: ephemeralrift.com/riftverse-a...
Video Playlists:
Arkham Sanitarium / Rift World ASMR ► bit.ly/2TRquGu
All Playlists ► bit.ly/2HYYG0g
Welcome to ER ► bit.ly/34RQlnH
Traditional ASMR ► bit.ly/2GoRQQZ
Experimental ASMR ► bit.ly/3oVOqGG
ASMR Character Performances ► bit.ly/364b2fT
Nature Videos ► bit.ly/35ZbJHc
Gameplays ► bit.ly/2Lkmygt
ASMR Eating ► bit.ly/3lEe4hq
Listen to select audio works outside of KZhead:
Spotify ► bit.ly/1V23U60
CDBaby ► bit.ly/1AUt3Jj
iTunes ► apple.co/1xIHLNd
Podcast Links:
Playlist ► bit.ly/3n13q4H
iTunes ► podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...
Spotify ► open.spotify.com/show/0mRcmWp...
Amazon ► music.amazon.com/podcasts/9dd...
Google ► podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0...
Libsyn ► ephmeralriftpodcast.libsyn.com/
RSS ► ephmeralriftpodcast.libsyn.co...
Website ► ephemeralrift.com
Patreon ► bit.ly/1EZgmNi
The Oxygen Man: Taps on ziplock bags of oxygen
I think that would actually sound really nice lol
Nah he brings out a bag of lays
Yes please
the NWO banned the inhaling of Oxygen
@@seymour2113 I love the lays idea. Plus I think it would sound nice to
If someone asked me 5 years ago where I seen my self. I wouldn’t have said watching a grey bearded man in a leather jacket whisper to me while scratching a headless plastic chicken. But, here we are.
Mood
That description tho lol love it
L
I said the exact same thing at one point except I also added "communist" to the list of adjectives lol
Bojnonnonpknpnpnknnpnpknpnpnpnnnknpk no kjjjnnbnpjj noj
Has anyone ever noticed how fast rifts hair has grown back. It's crazy.
No no he has a point
I mean it has been a year
@@quinnkennedy8132 but long hair
In 6 days on June 19th it will have a been a year since he has shaved his head
@@Bone20647 people with long hair know that long hair does not take long to grow
The Medieval Man: A man which sells medieval-styled weaponry, armour and words.
Medieval words for sale? You have my attention
ye hath mine attention sire!
If he Does this I am 99% sure the rubber chicken will be a weapon.
I can one-up you, The Arkham Blacksmith, doing ASMR with knives, whetstone, etc.
@@JonathanNWHunt woah. 👀
12:16 ER: Is there anything written on it? Me: All my life accomplishments ER: No? Nothing? Me: Y-yeah
OOF, felt that
Pain
Owch lol
*feels bad*
Oof size: *U N I V E R S A L*
God, I only knew I missed the man rift series when I heard "Imagine, if you will"
The “duke” Xbox controller was so hard to play as a kid. However the feeling of using it while playing the original Halo will never be forgotten! Awesome video!
Agreed
as someone with large hands, that was the best controller ever
It's funny, I first tried Halo at a game stop, and didn't buy the Xbox because of that controller. It took them making a normal sized one for me to get one xD
@@JLawL I will say I didn’t really get into Xbox until the second version of the controller was released. Around the time Halo 2 was released. Been hooked on XBOX ever since.
The duke was so horrible for me lol. I was way too happy when they made the second gen controller smaller.
He needs to do a “periodic table” man. How? I don’t know. He’s more creative than me.
Tiny packs of elements.
@@parjai97 the 3D periodic table that has small pieces of each element inside the glass
"The Element Man"
@@kadendesmarais that doesn't sound safe
This is Titanium. *tap tap tap tap tap* They used to make spoons out of these, but they're banned. Both titanium and spoons that is. *tap tap tap tap tap*
The iron man: the man who sells diferent brands of iron for clothes
I would like a video like that just to hear him say "I am Iron Man"
the spider man: a man who sells several kinds of spiders, including halloween decorations, figures, plushies, and yes, even living ones
He already did snack man
Im waiting the scat man
Batman he sells different kinds of baseball bats
Bob the void sounds like a cool side character in star wars or star trek
@Beasty a nerd who benches 270 lbs at 16 😎. But fruit Rollups slap
@@riadhmami5067 ok
@@riadhmami5067 he was being ironic but ur weird
@@abyzz6252 I've been called weird and a nerd 😭.
@@josephjoestar953 *crying sounds*
Blue Gamecube controller...this Man clearly has taste.
I’m more of a platinum GameCube controller man, myself.
@@LuckyArceus certainly respectable
i always had a black gamecube controller
I had an orange one my dumbass sold at a yard sale for 5 bucks when i was a kid
I’m too young to know what the cool kids were back then
The “ephemeral rift man”: another clone who tells the greatest stories of the ancient asmrist ephemeral rift who’s craft was banned by the nwo
Ahhhh caveira
I’m taking a crap on ur lawn rn look out ur window
@@itakecrapsonurlawn4209 get back here!
lo
lol
"E.T.: Extra Terrestrial... Global hit." Was relaxing decently well until I quietly busted out laughing at this. The man knows his lore.
The potion man: a man that sells glass bottles filled with mysterious liquids with adverse affects like the pill asmr video and there is water at a slight boil in the background
My potions are too strong for you, traveler
Potion seller, please, sell me only your strongest potions.
@@animalbancho1726 You're a rascal! You're a rascal with no respect for knights!
Idea: handy man: he has several different hands to choose from, ending in him showing us Corvus’s hands (possibly explaining/ showing how he got them)
@@narwhakun thanks!
Your one fart smeller
@@ExulInsani [???]
@@ExulInsani I don’t know about that last part, but I know a lot about GASTER and such
So glad he's finally made it to the 1 million milestone. It's been a long time coming and it's well deserved. His passion for his content oozes out of every video
Rubber Chicken Man: Scouring the Multiverse, collecting bits and pieces of rubber chickens, hoping that one day, he will find the last rubber chicken in existence.
Yo wtf this shit good bru bussin
The last chicken is of course, chicken finger.
I've always found it interesting how Atari came out with a simple sleek controller with just a joystick and one button, and Coleco decided it was a good idea to try and one-up that with a full number pad and side buttons and later an oversized controller that added even more buttons. Today it seems obvious that the simpler controller would come out on top but I suppose the industry was so new at that point that they thought more equaled better.
It always blew my mind having wireless Atari controllers for the 2600. See? That is innovation. Alot of games literally only used a joystick, and sometimes a pew-pew button. Whatever they had in mind, it makes me wonder. They did the same dumb thing for the Atari Jaguar. Apparently the point of the buttons was to be able to control the speed and other variables of games you played - color, sound options, stuff like that instead of using just the levers on the console itself. Its like they tried making games to work with all the number buttons after they didn't properly implement them as intended? IDK. The amount of gimmicky products that ended up as failed experiments that were actually sold is astounding. No QC lol.
Your timing is impeccable Uncle ‘E3’
Nice pun. 👍
The delivery man needs to start with "Imagine if you will... a world where same day delivery was rea...l"
Somebody call the pizza?
What if you get your orders from the other “man” videos
FedExcellent
Hail Sithis indeed my friend.
“BY SITHIS THIS ENDS NOW”
What is life's great illusion?
I WAS LOOKING FOR A SKYRIM COMMENT
into the void we go
I thought he said "Seteth" who is a character in Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Occasionally I tune in and out of Rifts videos. Like, for instance, last time I saw one of his videos he was beardless and his hair was short. Time really flies.
That’s like me with reality. Yesterday I swear I was 6 and today I’m old with grey hair.
@@EphemeralRift It's always like that.
The Bat Man: the man that sells you different brands -- and different material makes -- of baseball bats. Louisville Sluggers in short supply.
swatter swatta swatta
@@UnchartedTheProtogen don't be caught dead outside the wall without one!
@@UnchartedTheProtogen don't be caught dead outside the wall without one!
Bat's a great idea my bat's off to you
Your whispering is S tier
@@deborahtheassistant71 shut up heretic
@@deborahtheassistant71 Gibi is great and all but this guy sounds so human and real and it adds so much to the finished piece
@@deborahtheassistant71 gibis is lke b+ for me and his is s++
@@crusaderxavier shut up heathen
@@deborahtheassistant71 I know gibi I but who’s gibis, and the raspy-ness makes it better. Also shut ur mouth heretic
I like how he explains why there are so many identical clones of himself in this video
Theory: The viewer is the same person in every video. In ‘Rift World Explained’, Arkham Doctors described you as ‘the one’. The viewer has a much larger role than we think.
The most fantastical part about this is that he actually gives us back the most valuable item. You’re a good ‘un, Bill
I never thought i would hear uncle e say Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Roses are red, violets are blue, Uncle E committed 7 instances of Grand-Theft in the years 2003 and 2002
Do a Heisenberg from Resident Evil Village cosplay lol
Even better... A Lady Dimitrescu cosplay.
Even better… A breaking bad cosplay
@@plewta even better….. Why not both?
Thought you said Heidegger
Holy cow this is a great idea, ER please consider this!
I’m preparing myself to imagine, if I would
Joke of the week: I got hired for an assassination on a foggy day, took the shot, mist
Goodad jœk
@@whyiwakeup6460 no
Lol
Justice will bring you down
That a good one don t mind if i keep it 😏
ER, holding the cereal and brain: yeah this stuff ain’t too valuable here pal 😑 ER, holding legit trash lmao: YEAAAA BABY THATS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT! WOOOO
I would like to see him play the binding of isaac
YES
God please make this happen
Oooo I like it
I would like to see him asmr roleplay the binding of Isaac.
@@LuckyArceus OH boy 2 steps ahead i like it
No one will be like ephemeral rift , he is the only one that present asmr videos as should be
i just got got my car back in here toalhdphone new card and phone car back from the
@@laytenci word bro
I would watch multiple consecutive hours of you just showing me random items and telling me they aren’t worth anything
I almost thought I wasn't going to imagine if I willed this time.
I almost imagined without willing
@@toptext2807 That'd be a desirable outcome, considering that could be called a dream and many people fall asleep to asmr lol
I almost willed without imagining
All of this sounds bad, but have you considered Iffing without Imagine Willing?
This man, from the inception of ASMR, has been one of the innovators of ASMR, and STILL way too under-rated compared to people who have terrible sound design & generic ideas, yet still have more subs than him for some reason.
People who follow trends and serve the algorithm get suggested more and thus gain more viewership. Welcome to how all big social media works. I’m glad you found uncle e too! He’s a joy to watch.
The existence of boobs is a powerful one. One that will one day be terminated.
The weed man: sells weeds he's picked out of peoples yards.
Great!
I wonder if the various "The man" clones are SCP's, are they all one or many.
What if the original man is the SCP and his ability is self cloning.
/1 would be the Candyman
That'd be cool, but he could be an "Entity", one of the few that exist in this universe. Or, the old boring way, which is just cloning himself in a machine. "The Man" is the OG, and "The [Item] Men" are all clones. The clones below "The Man" consider themselves brothers, and "The Man" as the father.
The thought and effort put I to these videos is outstanding. It's like I'm watching ASMR in our own little cinematic universe. Keep it up 👊
I wasn't expecting him to actually say, "You may call me Willard." I was expecting the usual...
Good god, ANOTHER man. I guess you could say it's...raining men.
Amen.
this seems like it should a regular show episode
That beard sure grows fast man
i love how ER makes an entire story to his asmr videos, its the best.
Will Corvus get his hands back? :(
Probably not 😭😭😭
When that crazy dude is done with the hands, then yes but oh boy. Who knows when that's gonna be.
Perfect timing! I've recently got reinvested in video games, and especially their controllers, and have had a hard time finding an asmr video with the controller sounds
Perfect timing, I'm completely exhausted from a 10km run, I was like, I'd love a controller or keyboard ASMR, Thanks !
Tingle city DUDE. And you're the Mayor. Boom this is fire!
He better have the Soulja game controller or imma be pissed
Or the Kfc controller
How the heck do you keep up with all of your characters? You have so many of them, its awesome. Love the weird and relaxing content. Almost to a million!!!
Been watching since 2010, I love how the Rift relaximatic universe has expanded. The candy man has been one of my favorites of yours (along with Manley ASMR and its sequels), so this one is an easy favorite since I love the sounds of people playing with controllers. :)
the jacket sounds are wowie
@@depausvandelilithkerk5785 okay????
@@meowzerz8 wtf is he saying hahahaha
Anyone else notice he snuck in some things about the channel when he was reading the list of games? Nice little detail :o)
The corvus game is just surgon simulator
Oh uncle Rift, I have been waiting for video game controller man to make a video! Love this and your skills to make such great sounds with controllers
I love your stuff and always have, can't wait for the console man :D
The sports man: talks about why his favorite team is the best for about 10 hours
Wouldn't fit the series
Reminds me of Dr Cox on the Red Wings in Scrubs
He already has made that character. It's Meatball Jeff
The Country man. His music collection. I love western style videos. Asmr would definitely would like to see more
You are so amazing and have some of the most creative content out there. Been a fan for years. Still dont know how you dont have a million subscribers. People are missing out.
I wanna thank you for putting me to sleep all the time. Your amazing and one of the best ASMRists in the community and I appreciate the years!
I was just about to take a nap. This is gonna put me into a dang coma❤
Finally, a cheap PS4 controller!
I’m a pc gamer now, but I used to play Xbox a shit load. The controllers were like 40$ for a new one. How much do the ps4 ones go for? Sounds like a lot
@@scatmann6502 a regular black controller runs about $50 or more
@@totalgoober Jeez! I remember when new video games cost that much. They actually cost that much, cause if they do, that’s 100% daylight robbery if I’ve ever seen it.
@@alexmartinez5859 I think new Xbox one s controllers are 80 dollars when you buy them from a store
@@alexmartinez5859 most of the newish AAA games cost like that
What perfect timing. Thank you so much Be safe, and take it easy
i need more video game related asmr ! keep up the good work my guy
imagine each controller is linked to someone on earth, so when he messes around with the buttons and knobs someone in the world just starts having some sort of seizure.
Thanks, I hate it
Ya not sure if this is blursed or just straight up cursed xD
It’s interesting that Willard uses an actual name. I wonder if he picked it out or if someone chose it for him
only your voice can relax my SOUL thank you for every asmr you do
With every press of the button E;R demonstrated the power he has over the tingles. I feel super relaxed now 😴
How the hell are his hair and beard that long again? In wish my hair grew that fast.
This man deserves so much more credit
Rift always delivers the goods, im always fond of his weird dad style, keep up the good work rift you're a talented story teller
I've been waiting for this for more than 2 years!!!! YEEEES
Last time I was this early the candy man was the only one of his kind
The cave man: basically a real estate agent for caves
*happy unga bunga*
I’ll appreciate seeing more videos from you, great job!👍👍👍
Never seen this guy before. First time seen a video. Love to listen to him tell this random story
The Sega Genesis will always be my all time favorite console. Streets of Rage, Ecco the Dolphin, and Hang-on I must have dumped thousands hours into those games growing up.
Why is it that most old school controllers look hard to use, but then again you feel like it'd be fun to use
I got into ASMR about 4-6 months ago because my 9 yr old son watches them to help him rest and he got me interested. I found you last night and I must say I love your unique approach to them! I find you so interesting I am reviewing them in the day so I don't stay awake in the night listening to what you say! lol! Your voice is soothing and I enjoy your ASMR very much! Thank you for what you do!
I listened to this in bed last night and fell asleep to it roughly 1/4 in (I know since I had apparently paused the video around then). I was however able to pinpoint exactly where I fell asleep as I remembered everything up to that point since it was such an interesting story. Tl;dr: ER is amazing at making a story interesting to listen to
Would love to see a Spell Man video, where the Man just sells us spells of all kinds for different prices Could be magic spells of any sort of purposes
The GameCube controller only takes me back
RE4 with that controller was something special
And smash of course
YES!! I was anticipating game controller videos!!
I'm on the verge of having a panic attack at 4am and my mind went to search for this video to calm down. Thank you very much.
Id love a asmr of just the story behind the mans (mens? I suppose) leather jacket
You missed a perfectly good “it’s the thought that counts” when you rejected the brain for payment lol
Beautiful timing
I want to play this Arkham Sanitarium series from the dawn of video games to the remastered versions! 😛🎮 Also Corvus sounds like a kickass game
I feel like ER’s beard is different in every video
God dammit this man needs a million subs already. He's so close
I LOVE time pilot (glad you remembered it)
YEAAH! I've been waiting for this
HOW!!! HOW DID YOU KNOW I WAS GONNA KILL MY CONTROLLER FOR WEARING OUT IN THE MIDDLE OF MATCHES! ... ... ...fate has calmed this day
I'm looking for the Semantics Man. As in, asking around, hoping to aquire some semantics.
Some seman if you will.
30:00 Controllers like this are so cool. You can tell they were made by people who didnt understand what video games were, but tried to give the device as many functions as possible.
Congratulations on a million my dude
There is no PS2 controller :(
I know who you are…HAIL SITHIS
I knew sithis was a familiar name, was sithis ever in any of the games?
@@scrithen2818 he is the God the Dark Brotherhood worships in the elder scrolls games
@@sigmanerd8553 i asked if he was in any of the games, i know who he is thats why i said “I knew that name sounded familiar” i just dont know if hes ever directly appeared
@@scrithen2818 he never appears…
Needed this 🙂 I miss Professor Clemmons, Dr. Corvus, Margaret, and I really wanna visit the Dr. Dave's Thrift Shoppe again.
Uncle E is becoming the definition of "a little confused but he's got the spirit" and we love him for it