Jocko Explains How to Deal with Your Girlfriends Jealous Ex Boyfriend
2022 ж. 18 Там.
95 265 Рет қаралды
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When you listen to Jocko too much: you expect the first answer to be 'Brazilian Jiu Jitsu'.
Guy:"How do i deal with the Jealous/Stalker ex boyfriend" Jocko:"Put him into Triangle Choke"
I expected a "no factor" right away.
The bottom line is jiu jitsu is not needed. call the police or file papers in court to get court orders when being LEGITIMATELY harassed.
Take extreme ownership of his woman (half joke, being the complete man in the relationship)
@@ugotlj4133 totally agree, this is a “no jiu jutsu” situation, straight up making a stand and evaluating if the relationship is worth the hassle - considering the second half - and going to the popo if dude is unable to take a hint
Start dating his mom; works everytime.
Sounds like Shoresy based advice.
Then his grandmother
It's not your job to deal with a jealous ex. It's hers. If she doesn't, then bounce.
Absolutely! Not by coincedence hes hanging around. Baggage aint coming from this side
Yep. It's called blocking and restraining order if he doesn't get the hint.
Yeah this is quite common, women like to have a little pool of guys they choose from when they're single.
@FAH_Q Its also becuse they have more options online today. Insta, only fans and those places they can get attention and find options. Dating is fucked these days.
No, that’s bullshit. Your blaming society for not meeting your ideals then proudly letting others know when the opportunity to validate your insecurity. If you had the capacity to moan online, then most likely the women your dating are just mirroring your lack of spine.
TELL HIM TO WAKE UP AT 430 IN THE MORNING?! HAHAHAHA DUDE I LOVE ECHO CHARLES’ HUMOR! Always subtle but piquant
I learned a new word. Thanks bud
Hahaha I loved that too
He is your polar opposite
Echo is the best. Can’t imagine Jockos podcast without him
😂🤣🤣
You tell him Jocko is your Dad 🤣
Amen! Problem instantly solved 😅😈
This is actually legit advice 😂 might work
Beat the sh1t out of him🤣🤣🤣..this jealous boyfriend obviously intimidates the guy on a physical / mental level or he wouldn't be asking what to do . Go take a picture of Jocko's car...see what he'd do to you🤣
Jocko's not calling his lawyer
Jocko's not calling his lawyer
"What do you think I'm gonna tell em" ... " probably to wake up at 430 in the morning" got me dying haha
“don’t wrestle with the pig in the mud because you’ll both get dirty but the pig will like it”.
Jocko definitely has a crazy ex girlfriend named Jessica... and so do I and this is helping me to laugh it off. Thank you Jocko. To hell with Jessica's antics
Haha, My ex was a Jennifer, but her sister was a Jessica
None of this is worth a gym rat. She's still into the ex and she's using the new guy to get the ex jealous. Move on. Shell just drag you down to her level. Shell never lift you above where you currently are.
Exactly, how hard is it to block the guy and/or find a new gym? Drama mama.
There is definitely a flattering feeling a girl gets by having a guy jealous over her, BUT if she really values the man she’s with and not that old relationship she’ll cut him off, swallow the debt he owes and call it a stupid tax on herself for being dumb enough to lend someone money who is irresponsible. She should not allow this to plague her current relationship unless she likes to have that attention and drama which is definitely a thing. I speak as a woman in a great marriage, I would NOT put up with this guy if I was truly into the one writing in the question. Lamb until Lion necessary
For some girls, I'm sure it's hard to tell someone off if there's potential for the person to get violent. Could be she's mentally not in the best place either. It's painful when you love someone, to see them in love with someone else, but no one's entitled to another person's love. And honestly, even if I get jealous, I'm still happy that they're happy, no matter if I'm in pain or not.
@@Theendman42 you’re good for that. Yes, like Jocko said, we don’t know the situation so we can speculate all day, I’m only saying that type of girl is out there. The type you’re talking about definitely exists too 🥰
Good points there! What did you mean by last part? 'Lamb until lion necessary' ?
@@cirstearazvan24 just a creed I think is important: be a lamb (gentle, harmless, without guile) until it becomes necessary for you to invoke the lion (aggressive, assertive and defending). In the instance of standing up for yourself and others.
That's a good point. Make sure she's moved on and ready to cut him out of her life. Some people are shy though so you gotta make sure she's not keeping him in contact because she's too nice to tell him to get lost.
Step 1: File a police report about the stalker so you have stuff on file that can be referenced in legal proceedings later. If he ever commits a crime or tries to sue you himself, having that file in the cops' computers, complete with timestamp and all, will be really helpful.
Especially if he is whacko and you end up having to kill him.
Agree but that's no fun! Lol around here, we gonna be scratching gravel lol
Still trusting the police is there for your protection i see. Are you an asset to the state? If no, dont count on it.
Honestly the smartest move, you never know what could go down in this day or age. Surprised nobody brought this up.
Yeah the thing is I had ex gf. I was avoiding her. She cheated I moved away. I find my self stalked so it can sometimes not even be the ex bf. It can be the chick manipulating with her body and lies. Having people take pics of me also. She seemed to get a kick out of and then taunted me. Happens playing games narcissistic trying to make ya life hell been years and still getting this treatment off and on. If that's what you get for love and them cheating scary crap.
Girl is obviously not over the guy or she wouldn't let this happen. Imagine if the roles were reversed, and how she would act in that situation. The guy in this scenario really needs to think about his priorities.
Seriously. The girl is 100% behind all this because she’s trying to make her ex jealous and her current boyfriend pay attention to her more
Dump that girl and find a stable WOMAN.
@@joinjen3854 Everyone looking for that wifey on tinder
no girl is worth that kind of headache.
I’ll pass on any woman with a jealous ex boyfriend my friends are either in the slammer or in the ground most times she’s using you to make him that way.
true that
“Give me a second…probably tell him to wake up at 4:30?” Lol Echos funny as hell
To know that "other people see the crazy behaviour" is such a silent assassin in this situation....because when you are in the situation, it feels so isolated. I've had a similar scenario happen, and it took 5yrs for observers (not even friends) to come out n say "I was so impressed with how you dealt with that situation. You didn't get dragged into the weeds with it, you held strong, you kept your integrity"
The advice I needed when I was young, thanks Echo for taking care of the young among us
Echo's little "...probably tell 'em to wake up at 4:30 in the morning..." mumble had me rolling lol
😂😂😂😂😂
Love this! Echo cracks me up “it’s in play” 😂😂🇺🇸
Stalking = unstable and potentially dangerous. The idea that her debt may be more important than her BF's safety is astounding.
Her cutting him off is more likely to provoke him. It would have no effect on his behavior other than to encourage it to get worse.
Wow! Don’t be paranoid, take the high road, don’t be naïve! Great words of wisdom form jocko!
Never shit where you eat.. Greatest advice I've ever gotten...!
Taking the high road is being strategic. Love it jocko
Damn, first half is expected "no factor" Jocko stuff, and then in the second half the REAL GOLD is on the table. Most likely the regulars at the gym are like "oh shit Jessica got a new boy to do drama about"
The wisdom I needed.
As soon as he said he is badmouthing him and his workout buddy, I immediately thought, “Then there’s a 2 vs 1 opportunity.”
You have one simple question to ask her: How much is the debt? The answer will lead you to what you should do. It's either a small enough debt that she should let it go, but isn't (why is that??) or a large enough debt to make her story seem logical and sensible (why would she loan someone THAT much money??) Either way, seems like it is not worth it. Not to be "tough guy" but the whole taking pictures of my car and sending them to her or whatever would REALLY piss me off. I grew up down the street from a psycho neighbor who threatened my mom both verbally and physically so I take nut job behavior like that very seriously. I'd get rid of the girl, or make her get rid of the guy...and to be honest, you shouldn't have to do the latter. If she hasn't done it, you need to ask yourself why.
Yeah, even as a female i think I'm in line with a lot of male commentors here, stating if she's not clear of baggage before she's jumping into the next relationship, it's not a good thing. I've known girls like that who jump back and forth between relationships bc they can't get rid of the drama until they've realized they need to be the one to cut all ties to the ex and let it go, regardless of what the hang up is.. the hang up is ONLY THERE because they STILL want the drama and they're not done with it yet. However, on the other hand, if this other guy is actually a threat and stalking her too, not just following you around, then consider regardless of if there is a new boyfriend she's got hanging around, the old boyfriend MIGHT be dangerous to her either way, and need to be reported to the police!!!!! Maybe she's coming to you for safety bc she doesn't know what to do and she thinks another male will scare him off. Maybe he's already been abusive and that's why she trying to leave him!!!! I also had a friend go through that similar situation. The new male in her life was a breath of fresh air for her bc she was so used to being treated like crap, and verbally and emotionally abused, that she kind of had to get out of it for a couple months to realize what a shit hole she was in.. but then had to go back to finalize things and break off all ties... but only after the ex started getting physically violent with her. And she DID have to call the cops!
Love the new shirts dudes🤘🤘
Jocko! I'm working out now because of you.
Wouldn't the easy solution be to block and move on? A lot of guys don't see the trap of making a girl your world. It's a loser mentality
Yep, she's the one responsible for this baggage, why is it his problem?
many are still caught up in the disney princess senario
@@uclajd Your baggage is my baggage? Yeah right, get in line or kick rocks. Simple standards. Cut your losses
Peak scarcity mentality.
This is great advice!!
what a great answer of a mature Man! Thanks
Needed this a month ago 😂🤦🏽♂️
Very Good advices🔥
Agreed with Echo, I think a girl would 100% cut off an ex if she really cared about her current relationship. She wouldn’t sacrifice her current relationship over drama of her past, and because she seems like she is, unless she’s incredibly insecure, she seems like a passive participant promoting the drama.
This guy is stalking him, pretty sure it's illegal. I would definitely check up on both sides to see if they are both nuts. This is probably not the first time this has happened so other people closed to them will probably have that information. Also if your source is a female or someone really close to him you might need multiple sources especially if it is one of her party buddies. I have seen the drama addicted females be a large part of this stuff far more than I would have thought possible.
Stalking requires some reasonable fear of assault, not just following someone. The fact that she hasn't blocked him on her phone would make it very hard to get a restraining order on him. This is her problem, not the new boyfriend's.
@@uclajd Thanks for the specific information. I thought there was more to it. Hopefully that person's situation reaches an optimum conclusion without much more nonsense.
Idk. Something about this story sounds off. I think the girl is really the one to blame here- imo she’s clearly just stirring up drama to keep herself entertained and to make her ex boyfriend jealous and her current boyfriend pay attention to her more
@@uclajd must be different in different jurisdictions, in Ohio stalking includes mental distress to oneself or family/household members not just threats of assault
@@BostonsF1nest I tend to agree with you on a gut level, other than the legal issue which is apparently more complex than I thought, if the guy wants to stay in the relationship then in my opinion, gathering information is the best way to make his decision for verifications sake. It does seem like she is making excuses, and keeping the guy in orbit to add an element of heightened drama to her life while still trying to claim innocence or even victimhood (just my perception). I would probably have bailed awhile ago because I wouldn't put up with that behaviour as it reminds me of situations I have seen and heard of in the past. If he wants to gather information the trick is being fair and honest especially about her level of responsibility for her own actions, which can be difficult for guys to do if their protective instincts have been evoked. They often let women slide for things that in thier right mind they would (and should) never countenance, and end up regretting it later to different degrees depending on how disfunctional the female is.
Whoever's reading this, i pray that whatever you're going through gets better and whatever you're struggling with or worrying about is going to be fine and that everyone has a fantastic day! Amen
Amen
Had that situation happen to me, he told everyone for two states how he was going to killed lol. I told the authorities just to cover my back. He did approach me in a parking lot. I told him to think real hard this is not going to end well. The authorities know if he hurts me is reported if I hurt him it was self defense. Once I got him to think it was over. Great vid thanks
_"He was a habitual line-stepper.."_
It makes a lot of terrific sense to do what Jocko Willink is explaining to do. It would definitely work. Because taking the high ground would effectively work. Handling things by taking the low ground doesn"t make sense because it would worsen the situation.
The jokes in this comment section are often awesome but a quick serious observation - full credit to Jocko for how proportionate and wise this answer is. Drama people and genuine fixated behaviour can go real bad - be calm but be careful is superb advice in so many scenarios.
12:50 Yeah, I have several times (and this is why I clicked on this video) start talking with a girl and she's single to my best knowledge and sometimes I am unaware of an ex or sometimes she recently broke up with him but I'll text her and then I'll get some super jealous angry text from her number "Why are you texting my girl this??!" and if it happens once.. Ok MAYBE.. he was there for some reason and took her phone.. but if it happens multiple times I feel like she wants him to see it and she's allowing him to take her phone and it's totally the girl. It's very common it's a "low brow" thing .. low brow, low vibration whatever you wanna call it. It's something that those kind of people like to do. They like drama.
Jocko got this one 100%. Damn good answer!
Good advice. I had to take the high road very recently
*Jocko Willink is the Reluctant Leader we need.* .....We know you've done enough, but your Nation needs you. 🇺🇸 *2024* 🦅
Jocko is too practical and straight forward to be a politician.
Ironically i clip the notification for this at the gym. At 4:34 💪
This really does work.
When I was single I never dated men from places I didn't want to give up like the gym, Sunday school class, work. In this case I think it's the girl, I would forget about the money and block the guy, I wouldn't date a guy who needs money from me.
Ha ha I am the same way with women. "Is she worth losing this job/gym etc?" 🤣
Echo nailed it
I agree completely.
I am so glad Jocko brought up paying his debt. (depending on the amount and the person's financial situation) it is a test for the girl and that answer is really important. And it is another way of taking the high ground, and putting yourself in a positive spot. Money isn't as important as peace. even if you have to give her some money each month to get the dude gone. $400 bucks for peace of mind and this person is gone? I would make that deal all day.
Except he's not gone because SHE is allowing this to happen
Echo is such a badass. Jocko is such a badass. Even as badasses they conclude the best attack is to take the high ground. Take the high ground but don't be naive. And don't let those creeps bother good women.
AS you get older and wiser you will realize to always take the high ground , more than likely the girl you're dating is more drama than the ex jealous boyfriend .
I have to Many options to put up with Drama from a woman and ex . .kick Rocks
Sadly dating and getting to know woman nowadays involves dealing with insecure petty jealous dudes. There's a lot of hyper sexual insecure guys/chics who only goal is to get laid and get attention. In reality it's the minority of people but sometimes it doesn't feel that way.
It also doesn't help that westerners always consider themselves as "animals" whenever they're pressed about shit like this, I mean seriously, you ever wonder why you can say "in reality it's minority of people..." yet also hear things like "men and women would naturally cheat, steal, lie if given the opportunity" like what??? basically human nature both is what we're seeing now but also not?, so what the hell is the damn truth!? I think it's a self fulfilling prophecy all of us normies today are engaging in, if humans are inherently shitty why would we go to such lengths to justify why it's "just a minority" unless it's not true?
Insecure, yes. Men and women both have their own insecurities, they have their own desires and interests, wants, and what they find attractive. There are a lot of misconceptions on both sides of the dating game. As a society we've done a horrible job of teaching how having a date/relationship is not your worth. Worth doesn't even exist, there's just people, and life, and things within it, let's focus on those, and get to know each other, hold each other accountable, to be patient, and love. That's what life's about. A failed relationship is temporary, and always has lessons, no matter how painful it is.
Man that situation is tricky i've known people with an amazing capacity for stress who were regarded as sound mind in all aspects; turn into complete animals over a relationship gone wrong or some drama involving love. What that dude is doing in the video is straight stalking. Literally do the same thing hes doing and make aure he knows it, if he has his phone out recording you pull your phone out also just so they see how dumb they look. ... If someone you love expresses that they do not wish to be with you anymore simply accept that. Move on. Find someone new or take time to work on yourself, get in shape, learn a skill, get into a hobby, go outside & get off your phone. Enjoy the sunshine and the smell of nature.
Been there. The owes her money thing is BS. It's an excuse for a line of communication. He should leave that situation.
Like the colour Jocko and Echo.
It smells like narcissism and you're being triangle .
I’ve had this exact situation. Leave. IMO. It’s never been the other guy in my anecdotal experiences.
It’s simple file a restraining order or don’t involve yourself in it at all. Once you deal with an ex especially the one who’s possessive you’re dealing with irrational actions.
Shiiiiiit.... I had a stalker for 12 years. I don't like drama, the courts ruled a restraining order against him in 2 countries... PHEW! This was very validating. Don't be paranoid and don't be naive. Thank you.
New women are all over the place. Usually she's not worth it and Jockos right, they thrive in the chaos. You don't want to smoke some dude sneaking around your yard in the AM over a girl
Yep, girls are like buses. If you miss one, another comes by in 20 minutes. One that doesn't have a jealous ex who for some reason she hasn't blocked, "he owes me money" yeah right LOL.
I'd say I don't even care, and walk away, and make him look even dumber, while keeping an eye on him. Making him feel like nothing, a menial zip, notta, nothing.
ECHO 😂🤣 Tell him to wake up 430 in the morning LMAOOOOOO
Also you can just tell your girlfriend you don't need that stuff in your life and she needs to properly defuse the situation. Tell the guy the same thing straight off the bat. Tell them to work out their bullshit before involving you in their life.
6:10 I feel like the only person that would work with is the person who wouldn't be acting so crazy in the first place.. I feel like that's going to escalate in some way. Not to any fault of your own. You're doing the right thing and it's not from a place of being emotional but.. I would say something along the lines that he's also inhibiting his own life moving forward.. though most people won't listen to advice to better their life so.. *shrugs*
Jocko needs to be our Commander in Chief
Usually, if youre dealing with a jerk, you arent going to get your money back once you break it off with him. When i broke up with my ex, he owed me 500 and i didnt even bother asking for it back because it would have been a waste of my breath. I blocked him on everything. These guys actually make a good point, maybe her holding onto the 400 dollars thing and continuing to have contact with him could be a sign "jessica" is shady
The owing money thing is bs. Tell her to completely cut ties with dude or you & her are done. Then completely ignore dude.
Exactly, why is this the new guy's problem? You have to be willing to walk away or she owns you.
@@uclajd exactly
When jocko mentions the baggage, I have actually been there. That's why I know think it is better to get to know someone before you date them and not go straight ahead every single time. Specially in an environment you are not familiar with, like a new town.
who asked
Dang I want those shirts!
Jocko doesn’t strike me as someone who would call the cops lol
Her: “oh no I think my ex is at the door pls help” Me (puts on Origin gi): “*GOOD*”
yep....a drunk girl started into me calling me crazy...why becasue i have been targeted..i lost it...and became defensive....people suck!
An incredibly proportional response
Relationship issues are the most common reason people are unable to purchase certain equipment and also go to Jail. Walk away from toxic people early and completely.
Good advice, as not everyone is a BJJ instructor!
Just show up with Jocko and have him stare at the jealous ex boyfriend for one minute straight. He will never bother anybody ever again
Your girlfriend has a jealous ex? GOOD.
Lol 😂 in Echos analogy toward the end, did he just reply to Jocko's, "are you gonna get your ass beat right now?" By saying, "yeah, i run that risk." 😂😂😂 oh, Lord, Echo. You guys crack me up.
A girl i used to date had one but when he saw me he immediately quit that behavior. Probably because I'm at least 50 pounds heavier. I'm not an aggressive guy by any means but it's a huge benefit when you are bigger. Punks tend to leave you alone
Love Jocko
How do I deal with my wife’s boyfriends?
Echo Charles knows!
Damn! 4 miles in 28 minutes?! That beats my best time by 4 minutes. Was it even or uneven ground?
I've shut down jealous ex boyfriends real quick. But I've gotten jealous of exes in the past. Being 19-22 and dating girls my age who have been with dudes in their 30s. Probably picked the wrong girls. But that drove me up the wall. Jealous current bf lol
short answer: be the chad in the situation
they had dogs with them...they stood there watching me and murmuring slander...i lost it....i cant take this abuse...they are jealous of me!!!
My ex owes me thousands. I still broke off all contact.
Yes
Jacko has a valid point. She could be baiting you. There’s an entire world or people that are not right out there.
It's simple you call in an airstrike
Hes the sucker, the girl is probably still in love with her ex and the guy is just the rebound or she just likes the drama. As the new boyfriend he should let her know that shes no longer allowed to contact her ex and if she has a problem with that then she can become his ex. Nobody has time for all this drama shit.
Jocko should print these out and hand them around on a card (not that it would be any fun then). Do not be provoked - if he can upset you he wins, if he makes you angry he wins...do we get the drift?
Unfortunately trying to talk to guys like that will only end in physical confrontation. He's so jealous he's angry and looking for the confrontation. Do you really think she's not aging him on. I would just offer her the cash he owes her and pay it if she cuts ties. If she cant agree then walk. This is why you don't date someone at the gym.
Do people submit these questions online somewhere?
It's funny and aggravating 🤣 and that makes them crazy. Yes. Issues. Try to stay away from an angry man. Serious.
Wisdom here.
Do an extra three sets and take full responsibility.