Raven Branwen had a less than impactful role in the story, here's how I would have changed it.
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Raven Branwen had a less than impactful role in the story, here's how I would have changed it.
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►Twitch: / eruptionfang
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I love this rewrite! Not only does it fill in some plot holes but it would have helped improve volume 5 without destroying Raven’s character and made Yang’s victory against Adam not only believable but more meaningful.
This thank you
Yang never had that one opponent she beat that would've made her victory over Adam make sense. Imagine if Naruto beat Kaguya without beating Pain first. Ouch.
Yes🥰😂😂 u
U
Yes😂😂😂
Really like the idea of Raven not being sanitized or villainized, and instead relating to Yang through a traumatic experience she had with Salem, and utilizing her strengths as a fighter to teach her daughter how to fight against a sword-wielder and show her love for her daughter through something she knows. Good stuff as usual.
Yeah, I think Raven would criticise Yangs choice to use gauntlets as a weapon as Raven would prefer slightly longer range and more evasive style. She would criticise Taiyang for encouraging a poor tactical choice for yang to train with gauntlets. Maybe Raven would lend a sword to Yang, and Yang would try it to please Raven. However, Yang would eventually assert or prove that her gauntlets are viable against a sword.
If Raven and yang makes up……….well I feel like that’s going to end badly as in (she will die)
One small change i always wanted to make was to Hazle. His semblance is terrible, Pain Nullaifcation isn't a super powered, it's a disability. Also, he shouldn't be screaming if he doesn't feel pain. I believe his semblance should have always just been Healing. It would help explain the screaming and his crazy toughness, while still trying to be a calm character. Shoving raw dust into your arm hurts, having raw elemental force flow through your body hurts, and your body trying to heal itself while going through all that pain hunts. And when he dies, you really can't heal from atoms... unless you're Lobo.
@Leah Warrin Yeah this. Pain nullification prevents people from realising they've been hurt, so they tend to leave injuries/illnesses unaddresssed. That being said, because Hazel can active and deactivate it at will (at least i think so? You can never be too sure with a show like RWBY), it won't exactly be considered a disability per se.
@@Mica_T my headcannon is that his semblance is toggleble
I wish his semblance was increasing physical capabilities into superhuman level.
@@Mica_T Sometimes people step on sharp things and then don't notice until the wound is infected, even walking is dangerous with pain nullification
And maybe Gretchen's semblance would have been something along the lines of "force amplification", increasing the damage she does in the short term, whilst his increases the damage he takes in the long term. It would've really tied in to their Hansel and Gretel dynamic
Alright time to start the Rewrite RWBY petition with this being ravens storyline! This would of been amazing for her character.
i think if there was a project among the community to rewrite rwby id be down for that both in a sense of consuming it and writing, maybe something with a following thats community backed would get the attention of roosterteeth to realize how bad theyre doing
@@Minecraftxpo hell, miles and Kerry were not made for being writers of a show that already exists, the way they handled raven's post credits is a perfect example, just like in improv, you GO WITH IT, it's happened, you can't ignore it, otherwise you ruin a show, and show the audience, you don't care for the original creator's image
yeah its been really inconsistent with how it gives information to the fans like how raven 1000% destroyed cinder but no wait she survived offscreen nvm i guess. It feels really lazy sometimes and not earned for these milestones characters make even the main ones.
I really like how you have Raven be the perfect person to help her learn how to fight a swordsman and get past her PTSD. Especially in getting ready for the time she must kill her enemies as a huntress who chose to get involved in Ozpin’s fight with Salem. It wouldn’t completely fix things between Raven and Yang. But it would get her started on a possible path of redemption toward a reluctant anti hero. You sir, have my respect.
The worst part is it would be a better arc for RWBY but we all know the writers like to reject good ideas and go for the easy way out
It just makes sense
There are a few fanfictions about Raven raising Yang, in her tribe or in Patch, and they are pretty interesting, in some Raven is a super cruel mother and shows that Yang clearly had a better life with her dad, while in some she's strict but fair and proves that she can be a good mother if she just give it a chance (and in some she tries her best to do things normaly but comically fails), it's like watching different timelines of what could have happen if and it explores so many possibilities, and even if they are just FANfictions, it feels like the more you read the more your learn about the character and understand her, at least that's how I feel. And I don't say that because I wrote some of them ("Yang Branwen" and "Being normal 101" if someone is interested), not at all!
Wait, you're Kirino2-0 ! I love your fics!
@@taranis9848 Thank you!
Might need to check 'em out...
I really like the idea of Yang sparring with Raven to get better at fighting swordsman like Adam. Raven could also teach her to be less emotionally volatile in a fight. It makes for a much more believable obstacle than her over relying on her semblance. Plus it would show that Raven at least somewhat cares, since she’s teaching her how to keep herself alive.
Raven should have her own redemption Arc.
When should get volume 9 or 10
They should change the writters first ...
@@kirino2-084 what do you mean
@@Jay-fw6jo I mean that if the people who write her redemption arc are the same that write her so badly that many youtubers, fanfiction writers, and more, spend so much time trying to fix her ... I seriously fear what they'll do with her ...
@@Jay-fw6jo Have you *seen* the way CRWBY treats the adult characters post-Vol. 3?
This is great, you didn’t go overboard and frankly, this rewrite would improve Yang notably. I don’t know if I think Raven needed to not be a maiden, but it’s your rewrite and it’s great, so I love it, and respect it.
Actually, this idea gave me a related idea to involve Weiss in with the sparring. The sparring could be going nowhere, as Raven isn't much of a teacher, so it's mostly Raven dominating Yang, starting out with Raven thrusting the tip of her sword at Yang's throat right as she gets within range, and it continues with Yang being shut down everytime she tries to get close enough to punch Raven. She's trying to land a hit and not to get frustrated, and failing at both. And Raven is trying this sort of tough love that isn't working because she isn't really communicating any insightful information by just being great at sparring. Raven might after trying not to be too angry at Yang decides to try and focus on having Yang read her movements more, but Yang isn't getting it at first. Perhaps Raven says to look at her feet, and then does a lunge or slash that almost takes Yang off guard, because she was looking at her feet, and gets angry thinking Raven is messing with her, but Raven clarifies by saying that sword wielders shift their stance for different attacks and blocks. Some more clarification that she needs to pay attention without looking down, peripheral vision, "yeah mom, I know' being testy with each other. And it shifts to Raven realizing she could try going over all of her stances and strikes so Yang knows what to expect and look out for, but at first Yang is angry confused when Raven starts going over swordfighting, but Weiss realizes first and explains what Raven is probably trying to do, and then she helps Raven and Yang understand each other a little bit better.
I really like your take on their story, it gives us a lot of the awkward Mother-Daughter interactions the show lacks (and I want), and give Yang more character development. Excellent video as usual.
I liked the rewrite a lot, but the main issue is how it leaves out Cinder's plans. What would she have done instead of trying to recruit Raven? Would they have just gone straight to the school?
Maybe Vernal could choose to sacrifice herself; give herself up in exchange for the tribe being left alone. And Raven would initially accept it, but ultimately, she'd feel guilty for letting Vernal go even though she was part of the bandit tribe and thus, 'family,' leading to her coming back. I'm not sure; I still need to work out the details of how that would work.
Not to be rude but he states in the video that Vernal goes with Yang, only to be killed by Cinder for the power of The Spring Maiden only for it to go to Raven instead. I actually find that decision quite brilliant.
@@kradaznable4948 oh no, it's alright, I'm just talking about that scene with Wattson and Cinder at the bandit camp. My memory may be bad since I haven't seen it in awhile
Not a bad take on Raven I like it, you should check out Celtic Phoenix's Fixing RWBY Volume 5. So far there's only 18 episodes but in it Raven is more of a character than you could ever hope I think you'll really love it.
As a Raven fan, I loved this rewrite. Would like to hear more like it in the future if you ever feel like making more.
I can honestly imagine Raven saying something like this in the story you constructed. "Look kid, I don't care about your master's plans or Ozpin's never ending cycle. I did everything to get away from that and people like you. But you've made a big mistake. ...You killed one of my girls! And I think it's only fair I return the favor."
Ngl totally forgot Raven was also part of the show.
I forget that rwby was even a show 🙄
Hello! Just wanted to say but I really liked this video! I agree with you! Raven shouldn't of become the spring maiden. But I also think that Adam Taurus NEEDS to have some SERIOUS rewriting cause Lets be honest he does! Love your videos Bye:)
What would've been better for the Atlas Arc if Adam wasn't eliminated in V6. Adam smuggles into Atlas and was caught and taken to the maximum prison. Along with Qrow and Robyn. At first, he and Qrow agree that Cinder is the cause of their failures. Ad would instead focus his hatred on Cinder as the cause of the White Fang downfall by recruiting veteran members in Atlas who're imprisoned by Ironwood. At the same time, he also plans to eliminate Ironwood to convince Faunus students to join him in the new White Fang. Since he also blamed him for the negligence of his people. But Team RWBY and JNR intervene and stops him before he can get his chance to kill Ironwood. In his encounter with Winter, he would taunt her for her father's crimes against the faunus even showing the scar he has been embedded with during his enslavement. Winter would then try to convince him to surrender to help him. But fails, only for the two of them to engage in battle.
Awesome rewrite, EF! Seriously, SOOOO good! Raven really was wasted potential! Perhaps, if you want to try another rewrite, you could try another wasted-potential character? *ahem ahem, Adam, ahem* I'd just really like to see more of this, tbh, even just other ideas for Raven if you have them. Anyways, good video! :)
If your going to do more of these definitely do Adam next. Say what you want about him but imo he had a lot of potential to be a great character only to be turned into the bog standard edgy psycho anime character His character short did him better than all the volumes he appeared in after volume 3
I just got back from Thanksgiving and to say this is what I needed would be an understatement. Thank you for this EF. Keep up the good content. I hope to maybe engage in an Adam rewrite with you one of these days as a fan of the character. No pressure though 😅😎😁👍 keep it up bro.
RWBY is basically just fanfiction turned animation now. You’d have to go back to Mount Oum days to go back to proper RWBY storytelling
@Julian R That’s literally what I’m saying
Vernal maiden idea reminds me of a rewrite I've been enjoying, even using ozpin roman
Wouldnt happen to be celtic phoenix rwby rewrite would it?
@@garytaylor8193 it is
I enjoyed this a lot!:) You should consider doing other rewrites for RWBY, you're good at it.
Alright already love it please do more of these I'm loving these rwby rewrites
Sounds good. I am watching a big re-write of RWBY while waiting on the next season, and I like yours as well as his, ideas.
Aye, more fixing.
We neeeeeed alot of fixing. Start from here to everything
Wow, I never thought of Raven being utilized to prepare Yang how to fight one on one with skilled swords men, or having them relate through ptsd and combat. I really like the added detail that Raven introduces the idea that in a battle for humanity Yang will at some point *have* to kill someone. It sounds like their relationship could explore really mature themes. I also think it'd be cool if they could also relate over their bursts of intense anger, like its something Yang inherited from her mother and that she will learn how to control as she trains with her.
First thing I'd remove from the show is the line "Salem only uses people until they are no longer useful" like good GOD whoever wrote that needs to go home and think about what they've done, since they sure as hell didn't think when writing that line lol
Man, your videos just make me so happy
Man his rwby videos are always a breath of fresh air. I really took it for granted when he posted rwby more often, still love them either way
Awesome rewrite that actually expands on Raven's character. Something I also would've added was the chance for Ruby and Qrow to spend some time at the Branwen camp. Like, in Volume 4, Raven gets impressed by RNJR's handling of the Nuckalavee, and chooses to help them out in the hopes that they'll help out her camp in dealing with Grimm in return. Her medics heal Qrow, and we get a little bit more interaction between Qrow and Raven that can explore their sibling dynamic. Maybe Ruby can also train under Raven, and Raven can bring up some information about Summer. When Weiss gets captured, we can have some awkwardness when she finds out Ruby and the others are with Raven. We can even have it be that Yang was going for Ruby and followed her to Raven, and then have the whole team hug thing where Ruby, Yang and Weiss reunite, thus lining up with Rooster Teeth's original excuse of, 'oh, we can't focus on family members, we need to get Team RWBY back together!" As for when Cinder and her crew show up, I keep envisioning a different scene where something similar to the Battle of Haven happens, only it's Ruby trying to protect Vernal. Cinder manages to overpower Ruby and the others, and Raven tells Vernal to go with Cinder so that the rest of her tribe doesn't suffer; 'needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few' so to speak. Which could lead to an argument where Ruby insists on going after Vernal, but Raven refuses, pointing out how they already lost to Cinder once and that they can't beat Salem. Yang, however, argues that they need to try, and leads the others in leaving Raven and going after Vernal. Raven can have a change of heart after either her argument with Yang or when Vernal gives her the Maiden powers, and show up just as Cinder kills Vernal, giving us Raven vs. Cinder as usual and leading to Fang's conclusion with Raven opening the vault and leaving the lamp for Yang. What do you think?
I believe Celtic Phoenix made a fixing rwby vol 5 where Vernal is yang's step-sister. I highly recommend u check that out.
kzhead.info/sun/o8yCXaesmZxqho0/bejne.html
Let me just say what I know others are thinking. I’d trust you to rewrite all of RWBY before I trusted Rooster Teeth
You killed it! Amazing rewrite
Wow this is so much better than the actual thought above volume Five that's ridiculous Applause you've done great my friend I think this would be a great replacement for Volume 5 it works so much better still gets a chance to see that we would come back
You're rewrite should have been apart of the actual show, I've always loved your ideas and theories when it came to rwby. Always such a pleasure watching this channel 💞
Well,I do have a Love-Hate Relationship with Raven Branwen as a Character.
Always appreciate your thoughts! I don't regret watching RWBY but after some time the writing [that I'm not too happy about] wasn't what I expected and would had liked if they take more time to develop a few things more to flesh out the characters and their actions better that cause x,y, and z etc.
RWBY is like Becker, it has the pieces, but just can’t put them together properly.
Actually, i think Raven could've still played a role in the Battle of Haven. I always thought Raven was the cold, yet caring observer. The one who isn't particularly hands-on with the ones she cares about, but she'll watch over them, and keep them safe, a sort of Guardian Angel of sorts. If anything, I think Raven has *two* main character traits, Compassion, and Fear. And when combined, they can also work to be her character flaw. A fearful, yet compassionate woman, who's too scared to let her loved ones fight against seemingly unbeatable odds, even though they very well could beat those odds ( *ahem* Silver eyes) I'd have loved for Raven to actually try and stop Yang from reuniting with Qrow and Ruby, because she doesn't want her to get involved with Ozpin's War, but ultimately lets her go, but of course, with the warning of both Ozpin's lies, and Salem's abilities. Then when she realizes that Yang and the gang are at Haven fighting the bad guys, and doing the exact opposite of what she told Yang to do, she joins the fight on the side of the Villains And then, after the Inevitable Double Cross at the vault, and Raven winning the fight (albiet Exhausted, as Cinder gave her a run for her money) Yang shows up to get the Lamp. The way the heroes see it, It's not safe in Mistral. Haven's in Salem's cross-hairs, seeing as it's been attacked, Leo betrayed them, and it seems Raven has done the same. But during Yang and Raven's conversation, nothing suggests that she was fighting *for* Salem. Something like... "Just because i gave up trying to beat Salem, doesn't mean i'll just let her win." "I know what Salem is capable of, Yang, i'm not going to throw my life away against an unstoppable force, and you shouldn't either." That second line especially holds significance, it foreshadows Salem's immortality, on top of reinforcing the idea that Raven actually does care about Yang to some degree, and that everything she's done up to this point, was solely to stop Yang (and by extension, everyone else) from fighting a War that she deemed hopeless Then when Yang finally moves to get the Lamp, after saying something about how "just because you gave up, doesn't mean that we will", Raven leaves her with one line, before portalling away: "That resolve of yours...is it Confidence? Or is it Ignorance?" Which can nicely play into the moment where Yang's team encounters Salem. It'd give Yang a "so this is what Mom meant" moment. It could give her an arc of having to regain hope. She had been warned of this, and she ignored it, and now that she's seen Salem's capabilities first-hand, she starts doubting whether or not they can, or *should* continue fighting. I know, this kind of happened in Brunswick, but this time, it's coming from *Yang herself* and not some outside influence like the Apathy, she's genuinely lost hope, and is genuinely thinking about just giving up the fight. We could have someone like Ruby or Nora say something Reminiscent of something she had told her mother at the Haven Vault (at least, this is what she says in *my* version of RWBY) "So you're willing to just live on your knees like this? To just let Salem terrorize Humanity, while you stand by and watch?" Having her get reminded of this line that *she* said, practically reverses the roles. At Haven, she was the one scolding her mother for doing nothing about Salem, despite being fully capable of doing something. Now, it's *Yang* getting an earful about wanting to give up the fight Or, something like that, idk, this is just the ramblings of a random internet stranger, after all.
Definitely looking forward to more rewrites, particularly if you'd be going into the setting itself. Personally I feel like all the mystical aspects should be tied together, such as the relics each involving the various tools used to fight grimm. The sword is the reason people have aura, lamp for semblances, staff creating dust deposits, and the crown for everything being passed on such as the silver eyes and Oz's soul. The maidens power itself could be something created though the combination of all four relics, and only the maidens can use their respective relics to their fullest potential thus keeping them relevant outside of being glorified keys.
For a first rewrite, this is quite very good :) I like it a lot. And speaking about rewrite, one small change but which would have made everything better imo regarding Yang is to have her look FIRST for Raven THEN for Ruby. We could have the exact same main events by having Yang reaching Raven's camp in order to set things straight with her (and that would be the occasion to insert your rewrite) and ONLY THEN have Yang reach Ruby through Raven's portals. The timeline should be adapted so as to make sure everyone could meet in the same way we saw for the Haven finale. But it would have ensured Yang's motivations remain COHERENT.
I love your rewrite with Raven!! Could you do more videos like this?
Awesome! So many people have done rewrites I'm sure of both Raven and Adam...which is sad because that shows directly how badly the characters were portrayed in terms of the plot and characters (done my own rewrite of Adam). Now if only Kerry and Miles would be down for a rewrite. Think if the fan base screams loud enough they'll cave like many times before? The bad writing of Raven and Adam shows they either didn't know what they were doing or simply didn't care about the characters in general.
Damn, amazing work would you be interested in doing a rewrite for Adam or Ironwood?
Now I’m just imagining Yang seeing Raven’s movements while fighting Adam. God that would be sick.
Damn that was nice bro! Definitely way more impactful than what we got
I allways though Raven wore those bootscovers things becouse she had robotic legs, but showing that to the enemy would mean showing weakness. So it could also be cool if they related with that.
Suuuuch a good idea for Raven. I honestly thought you were going to restate your plans for RWBY if you ever got to write a volume, which was to crash the show so hard into the ground it got a reboot.
A fix I would do to ironwood is similar to something in Destiny: “have the grips of his guns be made out of Grimm bones” Have moments where he feels unsure and he grabs the guns for guidance and salems words feed into his mind.
I freakin love your idea!
I like Raven a lot. Her talk with Qrow in Volume 4 is my fav. dialog in the entire volume because of the atmosphere. I believe the fact she is a maiden could be a hint of a only maiden team rwby. After Volume 8 We know Cinder (Ruby) Raven (Yang) and Winter (Weiß) all of these have a connection to a member of team rwby. I hope that this is to much of a red hering to be true. I really dont need a full maiden team. Even with the potenial to reunit Salem with her 4 daughters
Why can I only like the video once? I love this rewrite!
This rewrite is the kind of story telling that the show has lacked for such a long time.... my goodness... Well done, sir.
i must say i like your take on how to handle Raven.
Bro i love this rewrite lol good job
I loved this rewrite! All just absolutely amazing ideas... except for one: You said that Raven should fight Cinder after obtaining the Maiden powers and seeing Vernal dead. But wouldn't that completely contradict your point from earlier, that this fight was bad to begin with _because_ of Raven _having_ the Maiden powers and thus not using her other, most certainly badass but heavily underused abilities? Perhaps you meant that she wouldn't instantly show Cinder her new Maiden powers and fight for a bit, if not the entire way, with the rest of her kit; freezing Cinder still being a possibility. (Honestly, I just want to see that damn revolver-dust-longsword-thing in action... in _real_ action, not as a transition to... ice and flying around? Also, I forgot her swort ejection mechanism, but you reminding me of it, together with all the other comparisons to Adam - No way they're all coincidences! That sword shooting cemented it for me.)
I'm kinda curious to hear your thoughts on Celtic Phoenix's rewriting of the show👀
This is perfectly rewritten..! I would have expanded upon her actually bringing up the arm to her suggesting the new colour scheme as a slight nod to her being her mother. Not caring well, but at least slightly helping!
Ladies, gentleman, that one guy in the corner, may we present to you, a rewrite done well. You may appauld.
This does exactly what a rewrite is supposed to do: give the characters and the world depth and consistency that canon unfortunately derailed. Very well done.
Somehow this is paced perfectly at 1.5 speed
I respect how you rewrote this section of the story be didn't branch off to the point where you'd have entirely different events and endings. Personally I did a complete rewrite that turned into it's own entity.
This was a great video. I've watched the first 8 volumes and think that Volume 5 could have been Ruby or Yang's opportunity to learn what Raven knew and thought about Summer Rose, a person the show has revealed little of substance about in 8 volumes. Raven may have bonded with Summer and could have had intel on Summer's demise or last days.
I heard that people said that the hound should have been Gretchen and that would have been better for Hazel betraying Salem rather than “you hate ozpin not me so I trust you with the password”
In my own rewrite, the Branwen Tribe (including Qrow) is my own personal favorite of what I’ve come up with. However, I still keep her as the Spring Maiden, and that she got that way by killing the previous one. She has the same goal as Cinder, gathering up the Maiden powers. My version might not exactly deserve forgiveness due to how determined she is to accomplish her goal: beating Salem, but not by Ozpin’s terms, by her own. She wants the people she cares about to make their own decisions, and if Salem and by a lesser extent, Ozpin, then that will indirectly accomplish that. Summer’s death officially set her off on this path, that and the context behind that death was actually a suicide. Yang would obviously be curious about her mother, so she would stay at the bandit camp. But realizing that the fairytale ending that she thought she would get, wasn’t that at all. And slowly realizing why Qrow and her father never divulged who Raven was. Raven is revealed to be the mentor to Adam, to Roman, and to Neo, all being apart of the Branwen Tribe as kids. She essentially blackmails them into doing their dirty work, she used them so she could self sabotage Salem’s court. Raven isn’t a very good parent, basically. And learning through them, and Vernal and Shay, Yang and the audience gets an idea of what she is like in a parental figure. Not good basically. And this pushes Yang to get over herself and mend her relationships with her father and uncle. Learning to forgive, learning their guilt, and trying to move on. That’s my rewrite
This has got to be the best rewrite I’ve ever heard
I like this rewrite. This with Raven adds to my personal belief that Volume 5 should have been split into “5 and 6”. With that extra time, 5 could have Blake and Sun deal with Adam the way it usually played out, Yang and Weiss would deal with Raven (as you explained in this rewrite), and Ruby and her team could showcase more growth in training with Ozpin/Oscar. Once Yang and Weiss reunite with Ruby, THEN that would be where the new split into “new Vol 6” would take place to get the relic at the academy like the originally Vol 5 finale took place, only with more buildup.
Wow that was almost perfect, I can't see much wrong with it, I especially like the links created from the results. I wouldn't give much to the Vernal/Yang connection. I'd be more open to just learning about who her mother is from her, like a Polar opposite of Tai, who has her own experiences. But I wouldn't mind yours to be honest I especially like your ending
Great rewrite. If you plan on doing more, please do adam next
The way I did it is I kept her as the spring maiden but I might use the this idea for my volume 5 since I kept summer alive in my AU
I think Id go for rewriting V4-5 wholesale whiel sort of retaining V6. But making one major change: Raven joins Team RWBY in V6 and earlier in V5 Raven and Ruby are stuck together on a journey. It was a bit of a mistake I feel to reunite Ruby Yang and Weiss so early. It made Blakes storyline more isolated and feel less important while also bogging Ruby a bit. Idve kept the girls seperate much longer but then reunite only Weiss, Yang, and Blake. What happens to Ruby? She leaves Mistral right as Yang returns. There would also be very heavy changes to Lionheart’s storyline. It was weird not having any sort of staff at Haven academy so there would be Huntsman who are Professors trying to help Ruby recruit more huntsman. Ruby doesnt wanna be stuck in a house like everyone else so she joins these huntsman professors to journey across Mistral to recruit others. One of which might be Lionheart’s nephew or niece (evoking a bit of The Lion King) who sort of takes Ruby under their wing. But then outside the Kingdoms they come across Grimm attacking villages and also run into Raven who we see actually trying to take in other tribes / people into her tribe. Raven gets a bit wary & conflicted seeing Ruby and here is another major change: Ruby learns for the first time that Raven was Yang’s mom. There’s more conflict there I feel in Ruby growing up not knowing they were half sisters and when seeing Raven shes not sure what to think. But Raven sees something in Ruby and Ruby wants to make Raven an ally. And much of V5 would see Ruby and Raven together trying to help the tribe get supplies or arms and Ruby trying to ease the conflict between the Tribe and Kingdom of Mistral. But end of V5 has Raven still working with Cinder and the battle of Haven still happens (altho way better looking than just being in a room) with Ruby and Blake switched. Its Ruby who arrives as an eleventh hour ranger to save the day backed by Huntsman and even some Tribe members who sided with her. Raven also betrays Cinder and they have their glorious fight because it works still. Come V6 we reunite with Raven after the events of Brunswick Farm in the middle of the wilderness. Wed find Raven having led her people to some safe haven in the mountains but the tribe for the most part has left to join the Kingdoms. Raven sort of has a breaking point since she believed in strength and power but was kind of disproven by Ruby in her ethos. Yet at that point Team RWBY starts thinking Raven’s POV was right since they are fresh off of Ozpin’s deception & facing the Apathy. They join together when facing wild animals that are evolved to face Grimm and Qrow gets badly injured (like he aint fighting anymore injured). Raven thus becomes this token evil teammate a la Vegeta or Piccolo or Cordelia in Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
masterful rewrite
I have to agree on many aspects. Sometimes, in the case of some popular media like TV series, film series or even video games, instead of slowing down, maybe put these series on a one or two year hiatus, reevaluate some aspects of those series and try to rediscover the magic of what made them great, many studios who do not retain full-on input from the sole conceptualizer(s) or even shut out the creator(s) of production of said series, and run the thing into the ground.
Thinking about it, they chose Tai to help Yang get over her PTSD and train her, when Raven would've been so much better to play that role, for all the reasons you stated.
RWBY Rewrites, huh? This kind of reminds me of a video i once watched, that ended up making a little short Rewrite of the Volume 6 Finale, that i actually to this day feel is a superior version to what we got, i can’t quite remember what the video was called or who was behind it, but it’s a video i think back on now and again, specifically when i think about the Volume 6 Finale. Also, while it was a pretty good Rewrite, your lack of mentioning it made me wonder, did you imagine that Weiss would still be there with Yang when you wrote this or what?
I think erupt fang same as me. Raven is hes last hope for this show after adam.😁
Great rewrite, I love everything of It. But One that I want most from you Is a rewrite of Ironwood.
I love this rewrite
I've been following the show since it first aired and I don't know a whole lot about writing and what people expect from the writing and I honestly don't care, I'm just in it for the fun and entertainment and just to see where the current story goes.
Could you do one about Sun wukong? I love the character, but I feel like It could had got a better participation. I'm nota asking yo mane black Sun canon or turning him into a super badass, just a better use of the character, specialy in volumens 4 and 5.
It's about time RWBY become the maidens and end the cycle. It's the only reason why Winter became the maiden over Nora. It's too obvious.
Raven is my favorite character, this rewrite works so well, and some of these ideas I had.
Me too raven is my favorite character
@@brandonkukumayeyi6048 Ayyy, another Raven fan 🔥
@@ayyyjirachi6530 but one question why we didn't see him again in the series ???
@@brandonkukumayeyi6048 see who?
@@ayyyjirachi6530 raven
This is why they need a bigger budget and longer runtime for the show, to really flesh out all the storylines and characters, because they don't have enough time and money to really flesh out the characters, so hopefully they can make a definitive edition to make the show as good has we know it can be
they could go back to the old animation to save money
I can’t wait for the inevitable Adam rewrite
Brilliant!
I still remember the parody "I raven, mother of the year!"
Hmmm I think you should do a Rewrite of the Aces Ops cause they never been explored and stuff.
I wish Vernal was developed as a character in the show, being Spring Maiden, as her last thought being Raven, would change Raven's point of view on people. Besides, I don't buy it Maiden following stupid age rules.
Eruptionfang would reboot the whole or RWBY if he had the chance
i can totally image yang gifting raven a "mother of the year" mug, with "-of the year" crossed out
Dude, your rewrite would make so much sense for Raven to come back in the future of the series. I want it to happen, but the way the story's going, Raven's return almost feels like it would have to be shoehorned or deus ex machina-ed in in order to make sense. I love your rewrite and wish it was the story we got.
I think you under utilized Vernal. Vernal could develop a rivalry Yang, the actual daughter to her motherlike figure. Doubly so if Weiss is still in the camp, roaming freely as Guest of Honour Yang's friend, wielding a weapon similar to Raven's. Thinking about it Vernal could fight both Weiss and Yang at Haven; simultaneously releasing aggression towards them, and showing off the Maiden powers. As for Mercury and Emerald, they can be outside, helping Adam set us up the bombs.
your rewrite is dope, never knew raven as the maiden made her whole "dont get involved" hypocritical lol
Her entire thing in volume 5 with thought applied is hypocrisy. Doesn't want to be involved in the hidden war but willing lets a maiden into her tribe and even tried to train her. That was bad idea because there is nothing stopping salem from just invading her tribe to get her. Killed said maiden and took the powers which means the second salem finds out she has them she's gonna be screwed for life and is ironically a threat to her own tribe just by being the target. Somehow thought that taking the relic would be a good idea because having the spring maiden power doesnt put you up shits creek already.
this rewrite is a perfect thing for the show. I can get behind this wholeheartedly. I don't agree with all your opinions but this, THIS I can get behind.
This rewrite actually fills in a lot of gaps the season 5 and 6 left for me. Properly setting up Yang’s encounter with Adam by preparing for it, mentally preparing your audience for the possibility of the main cast killing someone, giving proper pay off to Yang’s journey to find her mother, making Raven an actually complex character, Vernal becoming important before her death….I could go on
One of the Ideas for Raven Branwen abandoning Yang would be having Salem manipulate Raven by threatening her family, and in order to keep them safe, she had to find the Spring Maiden and protect her until it's time to collect the Relics. She would work with Lionheart in weakening Haven Academy's Huntsmen Military Might by using her Bandit Tribe to hunt down the Hunters and eliminate them. Just an idea.
Hey I have a question how do you deal with the disappointment that Rwby may never live up to the potential it once showed . And have you found any anime that come close or have a similar feeling I know everyone recommends soul eater and god eater but I’ve already seen them. Till next time
This sounds so good. How in the fuck does something that you've spoken of for 10 minutes intrigue me more than the actual story that they put to use? I know that other people have asked why you don't go help Roosterteeth rewrite their scripts but honestly, I'm glad that your talent isn't being wasted in that oppressive money-grubbing life-sucking major corporation. If it isn't too much to ask for (and that's completely facetious because it absolutely most certainly is), I'd be far more interested in reading an original story of your own making than whatever garbage RWBY is spitting out now.
You're right. This is way better than how it was handled in the canon.
I kinda wish you added the whole army of branwens you gushed over in the adam vs raven manga