the LIES you're being sold about personal style (wardrobe declutter + chat with me)
As a former fashion influencer, I'm exposing how fashion influencers mislead you when it comes to developing authentic style and a realistic wardrobe. By keeping these things in mind when viewing fashion content online, you can avoid making regretful purchases and remain true to your own unique style.
00:00 // don’t buy into it
02:37 // lie no. 1 - on endless options
05:50 // lie no. 2 - on always wanting more
07:31 // lie no. 3 - on buying everything new
10:06 // lie no. 4 - on trends
13:56 // how to deal with the "maybe" pile ↓
👗 HOW TO MAKE DECLUTTERING YOUR WARDROBE EASIER
• THIS is why declutteri...
🖐🏼 DON’T MAKE THIS MISTAKE AFTER DECLUTTERING YOUR WARDROBE
• I learned THIS the har...
✨ THINGS I'M NOT BUYING THIS YEAR
• 14 Things I'm NOT Buyi...
📦 DECLUTTERING MINI SERIES
Episode 1 - • Decluttering and Organ...
Episode 2 - • Decluttering our MESSI...
Episode 3 - • Kitchen Declutter, Org...
📲 WHY I QUIT SOCIAL MEDIA
• Why I'm Quitting Socia...
🙅🏽♀️ 2 MONTHS WITHOUT SOCIAL MEDIA
• Life AFTER DELETING So...
💌 CONNECT WITH ME!
haleyvillena@gmail.com
wardrobe declutter, declutter with me, minimalist wardrobe, personal style, authentic style, how to find personal style, simple style, slow fashion, sustainable fashion #wardrobedeclutter #slowfashion
Have you ever purchased something simply because you liked how it looked on an influencer - only to find out that you didn't really like it on yourself AFTER buying it? 🥴I certainly have!
No. I’ve been aware about colors and body shapes for many years, so I know the styles, cuts and shades that work best for my coloring and body shape. So I make purchases based on that.
That's wonderful!
I have purchased items based on what I saw from influencers, but they either didn't look good on my body or I realized that the items weren't relevant to the life I have. I think many of us buy for our "fantasy selves"!!
Absolutely - the fantasy self when shopping can be so overpowering!
@HaleyVillena Do fashion influences( specifically minimalism ones) even speak or engage regarding body shape, height, medical conditions, and expenses. Medical conditions should really be discussed because the correct winter fashion is incredibly important. People have asthma, blood conditions, skin conditions. How does minimalism fashion help /work in those cases?
I actually unfollowed all fashion influencers at the beginning of the year. I realized how it was negatively impacting me. I’m definitely finding my style now that I don’t follow them.
I support this! I had to do this frequently when I was using Instagram. Happy for you that you're finding your own unique style now 🫶🏽
Me too
One thing that I don't see represented in fashion content is just good normal, practical clothes. I want jeans that are high rise, have big pockets, and are loose and stretchy enough to be comfy. I want some jeans that can spread manure in without worrying about staining my jeans. I want tshirts that won't ride up when I exercise or garden. I want jacket pockets with zippers. I don't want to wear all black or beige. I want bras with wide, padded straps that don't ride down. Do influencers ever talk about that kind of stuff?
I feel like woman are getting tired of society and social media pushing overconsumption on us. I got rid of 50% off my stuff when I moved into a new house this year. I got rid of pants and jeans that I diddnt fit for already over a year. Got rid of lots of tops and dresses that I kept for 'if I might need it one day'. And I decluttered 15 fragrances. It feels soooo much better. I am 32, I was ready for this.
Rightfully so! That feeling of lightness after decluttering is so freeing.
My husband took a work trip with two coworkers to Europe and he said the guy with the smallest suitcase looked the best, while the guy who overpacked looked the worst. Good lesson.
Thanks for sharing this - less is more!
Minimalism can just be the other side of the same coin, leading to shopping hauls later, why go from one extreme to the other? I don't buy this minimalist trend either, the excessive decluttering followed by shopping sprees, just stay in the middle, be balanced and moderate in all things
I hear where you’re coming from, however I do believe minimalism can create lasting change if there’s intrinsic motivation. Decluttering is just one step so of course if it’s the only thing that one does to adopt minimalism then it won’t last as it’s all for the aesthetic. Balance and moderation are important - but I don’t agree that minimalism is just a trend for everyone who lives this lifestyle. It certainly isn’t for me!
Well said. Well said. All these decluttering videos are the same. I’ve seen minimalism vlogs that end up pushing buying storage containers or items that you just don’t need. I’ve also seen people declutter only to come back and “declutter” again. Just a vicious cycle that doesn’t make sense.
I’ve never been susceptible to influence from others, but I used to buy clothes (and other things) that I thought I needed for a life I wasn’t even living. I had “funeral clothes”, little black cocktail dresses, heels, athletic gear, etc. I was in my 40s before I realized how stupid all that was. Now, everything I own gets used/worn.
I dont get excited when i see celebrities closets,i get overwhelmed 😅 it stresses me out just looking at it. I used to have too many,til the day i just wanted to go back to the roots,a smaler closet,what i used to have back in 2011 and i was happy with it. Now im so happy, again, with what i have, its a bit more than back in 2011,but not nearly as much as the time i had 2x over 2m and a smaller wardrobe-and i didnt used what i had. Now i love evry piece, and i buy for some "hole" i have.❤
I think that's a good sign then! I'm feeling the same way about my own wardrobe now too ☺️
I have a rule that whenever I shop and buy new things, I also have to clear out at least SOME items from my closet.
Love that! Like the one in one out method 🙌🏽
Thank you SO much for this video. I could have a closet full of clothes but I still only seem to go to a few things on repeat because I feel so good and comfortable in them! I also stopped buying beautiful things that I KNOW I won’t have anywhere to wear them…..but I just loved them. I am much more realistic now with myself as to my actual lifestyle. I also thrift so much more now.
Thank you for sharing your experience! I'm also in the process of learning to simply admire beautiful things and not feel the need to acquire them.
Me too! So many things can be worn on repeat with tiny tweaks and do important to know our lifestyle and what can be worn and what we can love but not feel the need to buy ❤
I'm done shopping for clothes! I shop for my ideal self!!! I need to understand my true self!! I'm starting at least a 5 month no buy. I need to be freed from the shackles of consumerism. It is a prison.
You've got this!! Cheering you on.
I started thrifting clothes six years ago and have never looked back. Except for under garments, I thrift everything!
You’re an inspiration!! 🤭
I have started minimalism in 2018. I got used to declutterring my wardrobe often. Today, I struggle a little… I only have black and white tops, i would like to add some statement pieces as well but it really is a struggle to find pieces that I really like and feel go wearing
Thank you for adding in your honesty. I figured this out later in life (in my 50's now) but, hey, an old dog can learn new tricks. I am glad some young people *get it* and are figuring out non natural stuff is not only bad for our skin, but for the people that have to work in these conditions putting this stuff together. it is not like we want to take their jobs away, but perhaps bring some of this back to the states, or pay a fair or better wage. Sorry, did not mean to go off here, but what you address here, not many are willing to listen, but hey, aren't we all on a learning curve? I was told one time, when you have curated the best practices of what you own, you can go into your closet with the lights off and pick out an outfit. challenge yourself to try it out and see if you come up with something cool, edgy, wild or even a vibe you get complimented on! Get out that maybe pile and create a look or if the fabric is pretty, make into a pillow, yeah? ps. keep the black dress, you look very sexy in it. add a sparkling necklace or choker with it... boom, done. In the movie, Pretty Woman. The red jacket you see on Julia Roberts in the beginning was thirfted for 30.00
Thank you for your comment! What an interesting idea to pick an outfit in the dark! Pretty Woman, such a classic movie, and I've found so much inspiration from some of those looks.
The only things I won't buy used is undergarments & shoes. Undergarments are self-explanitory as to why I won't buy them used but as far as shoes are concerned, I won't buy them for two reasons... 1) you never know the state of the feet of the previous owner and there is no way to ensure cleanliness. 2) depending on the previous owners gate, stance & weigh distribution, they could have worn in a way that doesn't match mine so they could cause foot, knee, and hip pain or injury. Aside from those two things, everything else is fair game to buy used/pre-loved. 💜
Hi Deana! Thanks for sharing your take on thrifted items. The points you've made make a lot of sense to me! 🙌🏽
When I was younger I dreamed of a large walk-in closet. Now after discovering capsule wardrobe, I can’t imagine having that many clothes ever in my life. The options may be great but it also causes decision fatigue and takes longer to get ready. I would still love to own a bigger home someday but I’m turning my walk-in closet to a library/reading corner.
I love that idea - it sounds so cozy!!
I've purchased influencer promoted items as I've been updating my wardrobe and personal style over the last 12 months. However, it can get incredibly expensive if you keep purchasing non-stop after watching so many hauls. I've learnt to control my spending and only watch these types of hauls if im in need of something specific and want some inspiration on where to purchase.
Thank you for sharing! Have you ever considered that your desire to update your wardrobe and personal style might be caused by the influencer content you're consuming? I've experienced this a number of times and I always found that I was never satisfied with my own wardrobe/style because of what I was seeing online. It can get expensive for sure!
Fast-fashion has contributed greatly to the shopaholic-ism and unrealistic expectations of many of us, it’s not just social media and micro-trends. I enjoy watching fashion content here on YT, but actually rarely buy from influencer links. My style is different from most content, less casual - I hate denim and athletic wear, and I can’t wear any synthetics, which most items contain. I just enjoy styling myself and love good clothes and accessories.
Valid point, but I do believe it's all connected. Social media trends influence fast fashion, and vice versa. Good for you - that's exactly what personal style is.
Hi, Haley. Loved this video. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts on this. I've been purging my closet over the last year or so, and one of the things I ask myself if I'm unsure whether to keep something is "Would I buy this again?". This video is the first one of yours I've ever watched, so not sure if this is something you've mentioned in the past, but I found this question to be a game-changer for me. I look forward to continuing to follow your channel. X Maryfrances
Hi Maryfrances! I’m glad to hear you enjoyed this video! That’s one of the main questions I ask myself now too - it definitely clears things up when I’m unsure. Thanks for your support 🫶🏽
Totally agree too many options fatigue, us I now absolutely do not want too many items so now am very mindful of what I add to my closet or makeup collection I only follow low buy thoughtful spending channels, I just started following a Chanel that owes round new your asking what people are wearing and the majority are wearing thrifted and makes me feel like the tide is turning to make thrifted ‘cool’ to the point wear I feel like saying something I bought new was thrifted 😂 which is fantastic as it’s great for the environment and our wallets! New subscriber! 🙋🏽♀️
That's awesome! Thank you so much for sharing. Thrifting is pretty cool 😎
I feel like for me this was very different than for most people (judging from what I read when going through the comments). Until I was 16, my mom chose my clothes and outfits. And she was more about trends then I ever was during my entire life. She used to see an outfit, like it and bring it home for me to wear to school. I was horribly bullied for that and have been called "wanna-be-Barbie" more often than I can count. That kind of made trends come with a negative feeling for me. When I was 16 I started buying and choosing my own clothes. I know I chose weird combos most of the time because I simply didn't know how to do any better, but I learned a lot on the journey. I mainly was inspired by male artists (singers for the most part, but also actors) or comic book characters (also mostly male). For some reason I never really felt too inspired by what women wore in magazines or on TV. Later I started using trends to shop what I actually liked (when something came on trend I was looking for, I bought it). I still ended up with a wardrobe full of stuff I didn't wanna wear, because even doing it this way lead me to own many clothes that didn't work for me - or my preferences did shift too quickly to create a cohesive wardrobe. When I started decluttering my wardrobe, it felt like it was the wardrobe of at least 12 different people. Also my choices shifted a lot when I started working as a presentor for a local TV show. It took a long time for me to learn what truly flatters me and what rather pulls apart my own proportions or makes me look lost. I learned the most during the time I was modelling (as a hobby) and saw full body pictures of myself. Usually when something you put on doesn't create the image you intended it to do, it doesn't work for you. First thing that happened through this discovery was me leaning into a VERY small capsule which consisted of only black and bits of white and grey. I wore pretty much the same outfit every day because fit, silhouette and style of each piece was so similar. I didn't do this intentionally, it just happened. And I started neglecting any other piece of clothing that was found in my wardrobe, so I ended up decluttering heaps. I also learned about David Kibbe's system, John Kitchener and others, got my colors done, stuff like that. It was very confusing at first, but lead me to learn to understand what impact clothes have on the way I look and come across like. And over time I was able to figure out how to transform all the information I had gathered and translate it into my own style. I don't have a super minimalistic wardrobe, and also not a "small" color palette to pick from in which EVERYTHING goes with everything else. But I managed to create a wardrobe I am excited about, one that instantly inspires me when I open it up and the color scheme actually makes me very happy. I also now allow myself to both express myself through my style and set a mood with it. And when I analyze my picks, I can see influences of what I liked before, but it is way more refined and matched to work for me and my lifestyle rather than just picking random pieces that remind me of something I saw on another person and loved it. I personally think that in my case this trial and error wasn't a waste of time, it was something I needed in order to figure out what actually IS my style. I DID enjoy all of the phases by the way, it just wasn't 100% ME. And about shopping clothes. I usually first look at colors, then type of garment (let's say I am looking for a specific type of jacket) and then fit, fabric, shape and style. That's the easiest for me to go about it. And I only do that when I feel like something's missing in my wardrobe. When I can't find what I am looking for, I don't buy anything and seek after it later again or contemplate sewing it myself (depeding on the fabric, I can't because my machine doesn't work with every single type of fabric). A side note: What I figured is that some types of garments that look insanely great on you might not work with your current hair style and for that reason may look odd despite perfectly going with your body's structure and shape. That's the case for me which is why I am growing my hair longer now. I had that pompadour pixie with an undercut and am transitioning to a medium length hair cut now. I also strayed away from bleaching my hair to platinum blonde and went back to a color that's VERY similar to my natural rather brunette hair (it makes my own colors work for me while the bleached hair made them look slightly seperate from me). So I am actually attempting to grow out my natural hair color now. The recent phase is kind of icky though because the darker hair makes it more obvious that this shorter hairstyle doesn't really work for me while the bleached color concealed it a bit. I can tell you that there are various reasons why some stylists advise you to not lighten or darken your hair more than two levels unless you wanna look like a completely different person and create a specific fashion look. Sometimes leaving your hair color alone OR simply just refining it, is best. So your hair should also be considered when figuring out your personal style, that's all I wanted to say.
Hi Julia! Thank you for sharing your story. Love your take on hair and styling - colour theory is important, and the right "hair-do" can certainly help with an overall look!
Thanks for this great video. I like the point about trying things on that you are not sure of. I have had a pair of pants in my closet with tags on for over a year (maybe 2). I keep telling myself that I will wear them when... Finally, I tried them on and it took one second to decide that I didn't even like the fit of them at all. 😊
Thanks for sharing your experience Heidi! Sometimes all it takes is that one step - glad you were able to let go 🤗
I enjoyed your video! Most of my wardrobe is thrifted and I have no shame about it! I have amazing quality pieces (ok a few holes mended and adjustments but that is part of the fun!). I have to admit tho, I don’t need anymore clothes and it’s hard to shop thrift shopping as it’s so addictive!
Thanks for watching! It’s awesome that most of your clothing is secondhand! There’s so much untapped potential in the thrifting space still. Shopping addiction in general can be so hard to break (I’ve been through it and am still coming out of old habits). Keep trying! It takes time to reframe how we view spending our money. Maybe doing a low buy or no buy could help you?
I honestly think that so many tips of people who have over-bought at some time and went from an overabundance to a "minimalist" wardrobe, is unrealistic for most other people, who just NEVER have so many things, or if we have, we accumulated over the last several years. I do however think, that having had sooo many clothes and options at one point, really helps in finding your own style, what you like to wear and what doesnot work for you. so, it should honestly be communicated, that havingalotzt some point will actually prove to be helpful down the line. also, all things we wear are trend-lead, if we are not very niche. Blazers, minimal pants and t-shirts are juxt really trendy at this point...
Would you mind sharing which tips you find unrealistic? In my eyes, having an overfilled wardrobe is the same all around regardless of how or when the items were purchased. I don’t think it’s having an abundance of things that helps in finding one’s personal style, but rather trying different styles. Likewise, while certain items like blazers or wide leg pants may trend at a certain point in time - if they’re a true reflection of one’s personal style and worn year after year - I wouldn’t consider them to be trend-lead.
‘Impulse purchases are rarely ever intentional’ Hehe
Thank you 🙏
Every few months a lady from orphanage comes to ask for clothes, I told her we didn't have kids clothes but she told us that they had teenagers as well so I emptied my wardrobe and she had to call people to bring extra bags. It's sad and assuring at the same time because they are in their teens and still not adopted but we can be useful to them somehow
That’s wonderful!
I bought the Marc Jacobs tote. It was so so so not my style. Sold it last week. Whew!
Thanks for sharing your experience!
I say “Fill the whole in your heart NOT the gap in your closet.”.
Love this 🙌🏽
About thrifting SHOES, and shoes specifically, i can't help but being a bit skeptical too. I can't get out of my mind the idea of parking my feet where someone else's fungi have been 😅 Almost everything else can be washed, but about shoes (expecially pointed toe ones) i am really not very sure. How do you really know they are sanitized?
Honestly thrifting shoes is not something I’ve tried yet! However there are definitely people who sell new shoes - they just require more effort to search for. Throwing used ones in the wash could be an option.
my wardrobe was 90% thrift, 5% Ross, 5% Walmart. Ross stopped carrying decent things I like, so now it's 99% thrift and 1% Walmart. Walmart being color tanks and t-shirts $5-$8 USD.
I'm a true minimalist for winter, but a maximalist for summer. I have only 3 jumpers/cardigans for Winter, a gorgeous white mohair and wool, brown jumper and yellow cardigan both in organic cashmere. I then only have 2 leggings for winter (perfect with boots) - brown suede and khaki cotton. My trouble is summer-time, I am a dress hoarder apparently. I buy everything I like, even in colours that don't suit me - I had a dress still with the label on for 2 years!!! then I finally wore it recently and realized, the colour lilac is NOT flattering on my skin. What a waste.
I know this is supposed to be a streamlined video. It be nice if you would go through your thought process on how you declutter certain items and not others. I guess more of a question on tips and tricks on how to edit ones closet. If you covered the topic before let me know. Just new to your channel just thought I would ask.
Hey there! Thanks for watching ☺️ I recently shared a video highlighting the questions I ask myself when deciding what to keep and get rid of. You can watch that one here: kzhead.info/sun/p9CvoLiOZIGHiJs/bejne.htmlsi=tcjBO_UoKYc5Bk7D
nice
Thank god I don't have insta etc because it sounds awful to be bombarded with this nonsense. Buying second hand is so much better for the environment.
I think life is definitely a little better without IG 🤭 yay for thrifting!
Minimalism is also a "trend", like "climate change"...
Fast fashion is accessible but not affordable at least not for the people earning starvation wages or the planet. Criticize boomers if it makes you feel better but it wasn’t our generation who started haul greed. Also, myself and my kids are totally into second hand
All that is just not meant for you
Definitely not!