Watch Part 1: • Let's Talk About "Baby...
Watch Part 2: • I Can’t Stop Thinking ...
timestamps:
0:00 intro
00:39 The Stalker Fans
11:20 Lack Of Nuance
17:05 Yes it's a true storyyyyyy
20:38 overly protective fans
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I absolutely appreciate the depth you go to in your reviews. By happenstance, I found your channel and enjoyed your MAFS’ reactions. But your insights into Baby Reindeer provide what I think story analysis should provide for the public, simply, what it means to be a flawed human and how we navigate that. I say bravo, young man!
Thank you so so much this is so lovely!
Poor Richard Gadd. In the 6th episode the character Donny mentioned that he feels like his trauma made him a “magnet for weirdos” and it’s sort of becoming true even in his success
I can tell you as someone who has had her fair share of trauma, this is 1000000% true.
that is so true and horrible. god i hope he is doing well
Yeah, poor Richard. He has to make millions off a TV show that misportrays his sour old friend "Martha" as a criminal.
@@jnm2088 Its a energy thing... There is a way that victims carry themselves, and think of themselves that attracts negativity. I'm just only escaping this energy trap.
@@trappedcat3615is she not-?
We have a media literacy problem and that manifests itself horribly on social media.
This sounds less about a lack of literacy and more about social media's obsession with witch hunts.
The true crime-ifying of this show has been so frustrating to see. There was a clear decision made not to tell this story as a documentary, because retribution against specific people by the public was never the aim. The kind of vigilante justice that the internet jumps on for entertainment and validation can be so destructive, when what the show is really asking of us is just to listen and understand. It’s a lot of missing the forest for the trees.
love this comment - he wrote it as a character study and i'm sure it was very cathartic for him as a victim to put it all out there. I can't believe people searched for the real life martha.
Exactly, It's so disappointing.It's like everyone missed the point.
@@sbg1911people are quite slow, he shouldn’t have even had mentioned it was a true story
I feel like the series also shows that theres no such thing as a perfect victim. Donny is a victem doesnt matter if he had made mistakes. Because those mistakes do not warrent abuse. Its extremely brave. And I forever respect Richard for telling his story.
Right and also that victims are not asking for the abuse, he might have been a little too nice and make one or many jokes that could be misinterpreted, but that's not an invitation, if anything, I feel like he saw more of her human side than the one that was so dangerous, "shes just sending weird emails" he kept trying to excuse her or try to believe it wasn't that bad, we all probably felt the same way for her at many points, victims also feel that way bc for some their abusers are not these monsters who only do harm, but people who won their trust, and that many times is confusing for many, they give something good and then something bad to them, it was so important to hear this story to make people understand its not all black and white with victims and abusers
@@SnapeArgento absolutely right!! Really good take thanks for sharing!
The nuance is what made the show so unique tbh. It is such a subversive step away from the typical victim / antagonist narrative we’re used to seeing
What are you talking about 😂. He literally made a show about his stalker going to prison over a hissy fit and then his actual abuser goes unreported and free. Then showing himself bust a nut over her was like spitting in her face before the whole world. Disgusting.
You mean to tell me that there are Tiktokers who lack empathy and have issues with boundaries??? 😂😅😊
Obviously, I'm being sarcastic. But social media does give people a sense of familiarity with strangers. It's important to remember that just because you know a lot about an individual, it doesn't mean that you know everything about rhem. And it especially doesn't mean that they know you or are as interested in your life as you are in theirs.
I mean some people on tik tok always do this things so weird, like when society of the snow came out and they started being weird about the real life victims, or do ships (not with the actors but the real life people) and send stuff to the families. It's not just enjoying a show or critique, it's about trying to dig more and more, it ruins a lot for the people and also the ones that did the show, Richard didn't do this show for people to go around looking for the real life people, but I guess these are the things that inevitably come with doing any kind of art
Shocked shocked!
I’m not buying the two sides thing. I feel like since abuse tends to affect vulnerable ppl, we need to hold more space for imperfect victims who might act irrationally.
The show resonated with me and the abuse I faced I realised what I did, while wasn't the same was yet imperfect. It wasn't black and white , i did somethings too and it's way too real.
@@anishadasadhikary9505nuance is a difficult concept for majority of people to grasp. Real life isn’t black and white
Such a profound observation
I ABSOLUTELY agree. Thats a big reason why there's so much stigma surrounding victims, especially male victims. Abusers are good at targeting vulnerable people, that's their whole job and they do it to a TEE. When someone goes through long-term, invalidating, micro-aggressive experiences, the person doing the abusing can take the victim's reactions, turn it around and say "aha! You see? I told you he was aggressive. I told you he was an asshole/she's crazy." The classic DARVO scenario. People who aren't familiar with abuse or people who are still too immature to understand the complexity of humans will see someone reacting and label them as abusive, which is exactly what the abuser intended. Of course, there's so much that depends on what the "reaction" is, but you get the idea
Love that viewers are basically doing what Martha did now...
It's ironic, isn't it
This is par examplar of how much I despise TikTok and how bird-brained and detached people are.
As a survivor of my own “True Story,” I feel this telling of Richard’s truth is extremely relatable. Especially the “why would he go back,” question. Although perplexing to many, living such an experience will unveil the answer if we are able to go that deep in our introspection and healing. Truth. Thank you for the commentary.
I am a writer/director/performer. I miss the days when you could just do a show, get an immediate response from the audience, then wait to see a few reviews in the newspaper (from intelligent, informed critics). Nowadays every man and his dog can tell you and the world what they think and the anonymity means they can be nasty and brutal if they choose. It’s no wonder the entertainment industry is flailing right now. It’s scary to be in the public eye.
We’re in a sad strange era, it’s become a terrifying risk to be creative even on a tiny corner of the internet. I miss when the internet wasn’t in the palm of everyone’s hand
Here come the fanatics….. I hate the internet sometimes smh
Gypsy Rose 2.0 This is such a great series and it's annoying seeing people just miss the point.
5:05 I don’t understand why people think they need to “do something about it” when it comes to Martha. She may not have gone to jail but she got a restraining order and what she needed was psychological help. That chapter seems to be closed. What worries me is that people like Darrien are walking around, consequence-free and probably looking for new targets to abuse. It’s scary especially for those of us who live in the UK and who are starting to build a career in the creative industries.
Of course that doesn’t mean people should start harassing everyone who was at some point connected to Richard Gadd until they find the abuser. A lot of innocent people can get hurt in the process.
This is so messed up. Just when I thought (maybe) the men would feel more comfortable about coming out about there assaults, we have these people who have a hard time understanding boundaries. This is why victims of SA never come forward and tell their story. I made a mistake and came forward to a “friend” about a time a guy got a little too rough with me while we dated. Long story short, I was trying to leave because he was getting rude,and he held me down and demanded that I stay with him, I eventually got to leave but it was terrifying. He then approached the guy about it. I never asked him to do that, and I was mad that he did. I wanted to approach the guy about it on my own terms. The guy became hostile again and sent me a disturbing text message, which brought up feelings like that night. People have a hard time understanding that sometimes we just want to tell our story to get it off our chest. for me I shared it with the friend in confidence. But he completely made it hostile. Sorry for this long paragraph, but i noticed this trend of people just not respecting boundaries.
I feel the way it unfolded with the big realization of the SA in ep 4 was brilliant in showing how he didn't even know how much that was affecting him because he was repressing it so much to the point where he allowed Martha because he was used to having his boundaries violated from being groomed and he wanted to be seen and she saw him both as a man and she saw the pain in him. She was ready to fight whoever hurt him. I believe all of this plus more finally allowed him to accept and face what had happened. It's messed up and the show is almost saying it's what had to happen for him to face it and be honest with himself. Just my thoughts.
His reaction to SA by Martha was a trauma response (fight, flight or freeze) - he froze.
This is why it’s so cool that he was able to portray himself in this way, so soon after his actual life events have happened. It’s what made it such a hit. I’m sure he knew there would be some backlash, but it is really lame how far people are taking it. Most people never would risk putting their story out there like that and fear that people would find out who they were talking about. Sometimes we can’t win. But I like that RG shared his story.
Where is all the backlash? All I've seen is unending praise. Hoping to find more nuance . . .
It is absolutely awful. It’s fine to be obsessed with a show for a bit. But it is not okay to harass the REAL victim. What the fuck is wrong with these people
5:15 I don’t think it’s _cruel_ to the real life Martha, but I DO think it’s cruel to the Richard Gadd. He wants people to leave it alone, so leave it alone. It IS a real crime story, but it isn’t unsolved, there’s no reason to bring it back up if he’s been able to heal from it. Seriously, by trying to do something about it, you’re hurting the actual victim more, and that’s just awful. All we have to do to help him is to listen and understand what he’s showing us, not seek further revenge on his behalf. I do hope she gets some mental help, so it doesn’t happen again
Lack of Comprehension and critical thinking is so concerning these days. Life is not black and white. This show really depicts that. It’s a masterpiece. I hate the internet sometimes
going out of your way to find the woman portrayed in this show bc of the parasocial bond you have formed to this guy while watching is just blatant insanity. like congrats, you're looking for yourself. what happened to just thinking about them while wanking and leaving it at that.
Life imitates art…that imitated life….
If an older man stalked a younger girl NO ONE would be defending the stalker. Even if he was mentally ill
yea they are even trying to find the real Teri. so unhinged
Some people left Instagram comments on this person’s account but I was gladly surprised to see that there were more comments replying to those people, telling them to leave her alone and stop bothering her. She is being harassed by some, but she is being defended by others (ideally she wouldn’t even be harassed but at least SOME people got the message of the show). I personally didn’t comment anything because I don’t want to give the harassers more attention and drive more unwanted traffic to her account, but I can understand the people defending her in the comments.
I am curious to check her out but wouldn't leave a comment lol
Sad :( This doesn't surprise me unfortunately. Social media can be so hostile. It just ruins things.
When I finished watching the show, I did try to find who is the real Martha. Got the name and so on. But then I read the article of Richard Gadd that he didn't want anyone to dig up further about the past. And so I stopped. It's his past. It's his right. So I don't indulged further. I know it's easy to fall into the adrenaline of "solving the puzzle", but sometimes it's much better to stop when we know we possibly would hurt someone in the process. I hope everyone can do the same 😊👍
I don’t know Richard I’ve never worked with Netflix I have worked on IP matters. A cease and desist is usually sent as a certified paper letter, by an attorney not an artist. I’ve never seen anyone send a dm to stop information release. That dm from Gadd is nonsense
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS COMMENT BAHAHAAHAHAUAAHUA the “I love your work” was a wild touch I thought
@@marshallstannus yea law is “reason free from passion” so we rarely start with “hi I’m a fan”. lol
"Please don't speculate" yea that always works with the internet
I think we know what Richard's next limited series is going to be about. Internet mobs.
I'm actually in love with how much you want to talk about Baby Reindeer
You could start by not repeating her name 50 times
thank you so much for your thoughts, i found out about the show because of watching your original video! im so glad i did & can now enjoy your coverage !! :)
I love hearing your thoughts about this show . Thank you for your content.
please continue to do reviews on shows and movies, you’re so in depth
The people obsessed in this show (like beyond sane) are usually Martha’s ngl
Why don't people just respect the author's wishes. Do unto others ...
She’s obviously struggling with mental health and it was reckless and irresponsible for people to hunt her down and expect her to do anything but become defensive. What she did is wrong but the situation needs to be left alone.
thank you for speaking up about this
I think the subject matter and the fact that it is nuanced ia probably hard for people to process on a place like social media. I think a lot of the communication can be like a knee jerk reaction to a perceived threat/ being triggered by the topic of abuse and maybe people experience a fight response at least the people bickering about the film might be experiencing that.
As soon as I binged the series a few weeks ago I immediately knew this is the best series this year it's powder keg of emotions not for entertainment but to do a lot more than that excellent series
Those t shirts that the TikToker created are disgusting…
Unpopular opinion: Richard Gadd and the production team should have done a better job at changing up the details to protect the real Martha's identity. They didnt do enough. They could have easily changed her occupation and details about what she said to prevent this from happening. The internet will forever be full of armchair detectives and richard or atleast someone on the team should have known this onslaught of slueths were going to find the stalker if they left in all the distinctive things about her.
I actually agree I saw an interview where he said “the real Martha probably wouldn’t know it was about her” and I was like cmon dude…..
So true!
There was no way to know it would blow up like this. They best thing to do is to ignore the crazy Tick Tokers.
Knowing the internet, they would've found someone to speculate being the real life Martha regardless of how meticulous they were in masking things. Richard shouldn't take the blame for the internet's lack of self-awareness. It is what it is
@@marshallstannus I'd like to know what does "drastic changes" he apparently made were. From what I can tell he didn't change a thing.
Your videos on this show are excellent.
Well done, mate.
this is so disappointing but I’m not surprised. I’ve been on a TikTok break so I watched this show blindly and I was really moved by it. The lack of media literacy on that app combined with peoples constant need to have a viral take is so exhausting
This kinda reminds me of that South Park episode where Stan decides to promote an antibullying campaign despite Butterscotch's protests, that quickly devolves into something that Stan makes it all about himself and for his own gain. Bottom line: STOP PLAYING AS VIGILANTES IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING, OR YOU WANT TO MAKE A SPECTACLE OF IT FOR YOUR OWN SELFISHNESS.
These tick tokers are just crazy. Just ignore them.
Why are you showing evidence that people are finding? You are literally doing what he’s asking people not to do.
Sadly nuance no longer exists its one extreme to the other. Im so close to just deleteing all social media
slightly off topic, but you mentioned bohemian rhapsody a little in this, and i’d love to hear more of your thoughts on it!! you’ve got such interesting opinions that are expressed so eloquently, so i think it would be interesting to hear your thoughts on the film.
Part of therapeutically processing through traumatic experiences in order to heal from the trauma, and important aspects is to take responsibility for our reactions, behaviours and "mistakes" to understand why we feel shame, guilt, anger at ourselves, to then work through those feelings and grow to understand that while we're not to blame from the trauma we can still learn from it in how we treat ourselves, how we react to other people treatment of us, how we treat others and how we can empathise and sympathise with others. It's not victim blaming to work through these feelings, especially when these feelings when we're traumatised is due to how people are treated when they try to get help for trauma. Also, I'm not hearing much discourse around how the police mishandle situations like this and I think that needs to be talked about more. Courts and police are woefully undertrained when it comes to trauma awareness and mental health awareness.
I still find it crazy that the actress they choose looks exactly like the real woman, then claims they made an effort to change the appearance of her... Sort of feels like he sort of wanted this to happen... It's like when a KZheadr does a video on someone and then tells his subscribers not to dox them... The world we live in.. 😅
i feel kinda sad for the ending that the predator suffered no consequences. His identity wasn't revealed, he wasn't charged or arrested, and his victim even considered continuing an amicable relationship with him. It's like telling predators, if they do grooming right, they can get away with it, but i suppose it's a reflection of reality and the show is just being honest about this part.
Brilliant analysis ~ I’m hooked thank you Marshall
now she's been on piers morgan in the uk lolol
I hate to say it but I truly believe that guy is the real Darren and Richard Gaad is obsessed with him. Look how the show ended, he wanted to continue to work with him. Richard needs deep therapy.
Genuinely thinking about this comment, very interesting thought 🤷🏻♀️
I fortunately haven't been on this side of tiktok but this whole discourse is so disheartening. Like you said, it's so disappointing to see people who watched this show and came away from it without any nuance or critical thinking. I hate the fact that this man finally felt secure enough in his own self to drudge up all this trauma again to tell his story and people are letting him down with this response to it.
TikTok is such a cesspool of clout chasing ignorance
It's kind of weird of you to further show and name the woman when you could easily have censored it out without losing anything.
TikTok is becoming even worse than Twitter.
Ha....so theyre just all becoming Marthas... Lovely... 🤦♂️
Is it necessary to also have her name in your video? I'd successfully avoided knowing it until now. Pretty counter productive just sayin
I just think teenagers and or a certain section of people just won’t get the complexity of the show and think they are really helping Richard gadd and not saying it’s untrue but we don’t know if this really happened
My God this generation apart from delicate is heartless at the same time. WTF. They were both victim of their circumstances LEAVE THEM ALONE AND TAKE NOTE IF THIS HAPPEN TO YOU 😡
Didn’t Fiona kinda…. out herself? I don’t think there was a whole lot to figure out there.
People are nuts.
Wow ... maybe the production could offer Martha some type of financial compensation and/or years of free therapy. Presumbably she already paid her debt to society and Gadd could demonstrate he really does want her to be left alone.
Thanks for informing us how some creepy people have taken this series into their own hands yikes
Not gonna lie, part of me do wanna learn more about Gadd's backstory since it was "based on true story", but another part of me also know that 1. this is still fictional so we will never see the whole picture and 2. it's his life and his truth to keep. There's no point digging up a person's past pains, especially when you're a stranger who can't do anything to help the person.
We've really lost our grasp on privacy and humans rights, alot of folk are delusional about their rights to invade other peoples privacy (meaning they confuse feeling entitled to invade peoples privacy because they can and its easy and confusingly thinking that means they have a right to do this) just cos they saw a story on the internet and want to investigate it. There needs to be more protections, or even etiquette rules that are socially enforced (eg not illegal but still has real world impacts, around our online behaviour. Stalking is not only super common these days but also extremely easy, just takes a few minutes online to find folk and we don't think twice about it.
You’re just doing the same thing, and also exposing the IRL woman ?
It is sad to me that most people don't see this movie as a form of art, that it has a message behind, a moral, and just another point of view in life, etc. Instead, they are obsessed with who is who and pointing fingers. It is based on a true story, but I fear that people don't see or realize that this is A MOVIE , it is ART, a form of entertainment. Of course, some lines and events are going to be depicted slightly differently, just like how they do it in the news, etc.
Sigh. Even more reasons to add to my long list of reasons to stay far away from Tiktok's horrible toxicity. I truly hope Tiktok gets banned in America ASAP. It's sick and perpetuates poor media literacy and emotional reactivity and immaturity.
This is why we're not allowed good things anymore.
People on the Internet being cringe per usual.
America really should ban tiktok
Fell off😊
I ironically just found out the real martha scott's name from you just now. "Leave her alone". Censor her name in the TikToks you are broadcasting maybe.
I think it really just shows how nieve richard really is. He put this on for people to watch an expect people not to care?
I think Richard Gadd already knew they would happen, and so did Netflix. He probably knew that her account was up. This is just a continuation of their Beef.
If you don't wanna expose her, why do you put her name EVEN in this video??? You are doing disgusting stuff too. BTW, why so much about her ? The rapist is the one that should get justice, but it's Richard the one who has to do that, not you
Good point, honestly just was taking what I saw on tik tok and putting it in a video. However At this point I will note she’d gone onto tv and spoken with news papers. Me using the tik toks was more so showing the discourse rather than “exposing” her.
Just asking legitimately as a non-fanatic. If he just looked like Darien why would he have to step down from his job?
As a guess, it’s probably not good pr for whoever he works for to be seen “supporting” an abuser. Even if he’s only guilty by public opinion that’s what businesses are built on.
@@victorvale1015 yes I do agree scandals can happen and what people believe can take over. But it also seems like an innocent person would not just leave their job, but would maybe even respond to the rumors. Gadd already defended him on instagram so it’s interesting to think why he would actually have to leave if he is innocent.
This all seems to be exaggerating reality to turn a two hour thriller into a crime porn "show" . And throw in a wild gay villain.
I recently dated a guy who was EXACTLY like Donny. He had affairs with men but would not admit he was gay. I was the hetero version of Teri. We watched it together and it triggered me so bad on episode 4 i had to shut it off. We are no longer together but i told him “i feel like im watching your life!!” He had no comment.
Pretty messed up he ceeated a show about her going to prison.
We also need to remember Richard is a very scared little boy who won't stand up for himself ( at least that's the way he made himself appear). So i do believe it's up to harder people to bring that pervert (darrian) to the light.
Everybody trying to suss out the real suspects and get into the "real" story, negates the entire fkg point and message of this show. Edit: Dear creator please don't ever use dan schneider as someone in a defense scenario, okay?
They both seem like pretty terrible people if I’m being honest, not being helped by the rabid fan base this has produced
I've stopped watching ticktock it's become so toxic . I think richard is so brave and as a survivor of domestic violence & S A having going through so much trauma, we understand it I haven't watched any of the ticktock. Videos Thank you for this video, and you're so right on your views and your other video reviews as a survivor we fully understand leave richard alone
12:26 this genuinely makes me angry. I don’t want to over share or whatever but I have a similar experience of what was portrayed in baby reindeer. But People who say things like this have no idea what it is like to be put in this kind of position. It is easy to think like this, but in reality, you have no idea how you will react in situations like this. Some people cannot understand how detrimental low self esteem and self worth has on someone. And the situations one will put themselves through when someone promises greatness and opportunity or just gives you attention that you have craved or have never experienced before. It’s an opinion that lacks empathy or understanding, it is honestly one that shows lack of emotional intelligence it drives me insane.
My God this generation apart from delicate is heartless at the same time. WTF. They were both victim of their circumstances LEAVE THEM ALONE AND TAKE NOTE IF THIS HAPPEN TO YOU 😡