People like these are the ones who make final decision in GOTY awards.
@PanDebowyMocny3 жыл бұрын
People like this are the reason The Last of Us 2 won Game of the Year.
@inilthfirescales12873 жыл бұрын
@@inilthfirescales1287 They were probably able to get through the game on Easy mode with all the aids on
@xptaco22982 жыл бұрын
@@inilthfirescales1287 shit game, hate it when jessica did the doobly doo what huh??????
@alexyz94302 жыл бұрын
And that is why none of us should pay attention to Game of the Year awards. Or any other awards, really.
@JustAnArrogantAlien2 жыл бұрын
Yeah but Control was a pretty good game
@sireromen53642 жыл бұрын
The longer I watch this, the more surprised I am that this guy even made it past the main menu.
@jessetheanimenerd33043 жыл бұрын
"Press start to begin" What can this even mean ?
@crash-testproductions9341 Жыл бұрын
@@crash-testproductions9341 *presses PC startup button
@uselesstable2058 Жыл бұрын
@@uselesstable2058 What? It didnt work? Hold on i know! Im gonna start my car and it will turn on!
@Lillianz2012 Жыл бұрын
@@Lillianz2012 It didn't work, I'm going to turn on the nuclear bomb so it starts.
@user-zv8li5ix7t Жыл бұрын
@@user-zv8li5ix7t Dam, it isn't working still? Oh, I have to turn on my BEAN MACHINE
@yeahjamesdoesit Жыл бұрын
I like how this singular guy basically annihilated the reputation of game journalism online
@splat-a-tat6780 Жыл бұрын
There are many videos of gaming journalists failing to understand the most foundational concepts of the games they are playing, and then turning around and writing about it as if they are experienced experts.
@miloinindo Жыл бұрын
It was tarnished long before that but yeah, this helped a lot reaching the finish line
@leonardorossi1543 Жыл бұрын
@@miloinindo true, but this is pretty bad
@TimothyGod Жыл бұрын
If game journalism was a old man in the hospital, this guy took the plug off
@palavrapormil699 Жыл бұрын
@@miloinindo yea like doom
@jakubgrono9070 Жыл бұрын
Gaming journalist is such an interesting profession. Being terrible at both gaming and journalism, yet still doing both is really fascinating.
@Rycidex Жыл бұрын
The cuphead guy isn’t even a game journalist though. But no one bothered to research that cos the internet is full of retards.
@kylevasser63888 ай бұрын
Reminds me of the redfall gameplay
@anotherone38157 ай бұрын
FACTS
@ihaveakirbyobessesion26172 ай бұрын
They only know how to gaslight you 😂
@NetBattler2 ай бұрын
It really gets me thinking, your job its literally PLAY A VIDEOGAME, IT CAN BE HARD, BUT YOU ARE EARNING FOR THIS, H O W you can earn for something that 95% of who play videogames PAY to do, and yet, you can be worst that a 6 year old child at your WORK.
@Vinicius_MullerАй бұрын
I always found it strange that people who end up as _gaming journalists_ somehow don't have the critical thinking skills needed to play games, AKA most of their jobs.
@invalid_user_handle Жыл бұрын
That's because they are the rejects from the pool of political journalists and not gamers.
@galahad3195 Жыл бұрын
What do you need to study to be a game journalist anyways? Seems you can graduate without playing a single videogame
@JorjIto12872 Жыл бұрын
@@JorjIto12872 you need to study how best to slam your readers so they get pissed off and talk about you more. It's not about gaming or journalism, it's about cash and pandering.
@329link Жыл бұрын
@@329link - Wait, really? So they LITERALLY aren't even equipped to properly analyze the content they're reviewing? You're telling me that game journalism...was always a self-serving scam? Somehow, I'm both dumbfounded and unsurprised.
@josephb.4640 Жыл бұрын
@@329link you just described most journalism though.
@ArpeggioPegasusMusic Жыл бұрын
I think we found the dude playing on all those mobile game ads.
@dampestsplash36283 жыл бұрын
_Oh No no, No!_
@Krystalmyth2 жыл бұрын
This is the best comment.
@TheIcecypherToys2 жыл бұрын
WE FOUND EM
@wasquash2 жыл бұрын
Holy shit YES DUDE IT IS TOTALLY This muthafuckah right here I swear
@raapatarobert41972 жыл бұрын
that's almost true mobile ads are even more dumb than this but this mkan get dangerously close
@pokzgg2 жыл бұрын
I love that when this first came out they tried to explain it with "he's our strategy game reviewer, he doesn't specialize in platformers!". I'm pretty sure I could've beaten this at age 5.
@poika22 Жыл бұрын
Couldnt they gotten someone elses gameplay who atleast is semi competent? Like, just call in your gamertard son to do the gameplay for the review. 20+ years of gaming Journalism is inexcusable.
@magnesjberg24 Жыл бұрын
Some guy actually recorded his 6-year-old daughter playing this tutorial for the first time, and she did it faster than this guy.
@wtfduud Жыл бұрын
@@magnesjberg24 IIRC this was recorded at some live event where they had only sent this one reporter. Who "didn't specialize in platformers" but since he was there and Cuphead was brand new, he decided to capture some footage. You'd think anyone who's ever played a video game would have the self awareness to see how bad the footage is though.
@poika22 Жыл бұрын
@@poika22 thats very unprofessional. i would be ashamed if that was my footage
@magnesjberg24 Жыл бұрын
Oh yeah, he’s definitely a strategy game guy, put him in a strategy game and he definitely won’t use a support move on an enemy
@G40ST2K10 Жыл бұрын
I love how music starts anew at 1:30 just as he stumbles on the next obstacle. It's like the game's saying, "here we go again!"
@elFulberto Жыл бұрын
You just made this video 50 times more hilarious for me.
@vrabo30267 ай бұрын
aint nobody getting stuck in the tutorial long enough for the music track to repeat itself 💀 this dude...
@ZkullShot5 ай бұрын
"new music, new obstacle"
@vintage-radioАй бұрын
I shared the clip to my housemate and read this comment as I heard the music reach that point. 😂
@WhoThisMonkeyАй бұрын
777 LIKES DONT CHANGE IT
@NikodAnimations26 күн бұрын
Fun Fact : For journalists, this is considered a Speedrun.
@Jessster44 Жыл бұрын
nobody has beat his record yet
@bootscats2928 Жыл бұрын
@@bootscats2928 That's because he's still setting it
@The_Catalin Жыл бұрын
@@The_Catalin lol
@iaretheaquaman Жыл бұрын
@@The_Catalin some say to this day he is still playing the tutorial
@oneandonlysd5061 Жыл бұрын
He really knows how to save frames
@hza-n6686 Жыл бұрын
I'm struggling to believe this is real. The "mistakes" he makes don't even make sense half the time. It's like watching someone who is totally normal, but like, drunk or something.
@Selrisitai Жыл бұрын
@Ghost I've seen people try to use fine motor skills like "walking" while drunk and it's kind of similar to this, really.
@Selrisitai Жыл бұрын
@@Selrisitai I recently played cuphead drunk, wasn't that bad, made almost the same progress as usual
@theRPGmaster Жыл бұрын
@@theRPGmaster Did you play it for the first time? And how drunk were you?
@Selrisitai Жыл бұрын
@@theRPGmaster how drunk where you tho?
@Somespideronline Жыл бұрын
@@Selrisitai Not for the first time, but after a 1y break. It was about 6-7 beers in (alc.5%)
@theRPGmaster Жыл бұрын
Me after the lobotomy
@TrafficPartyHatTest7 ай бұрын
LMAOOOOO
@amorfati834125 күн бұрын
ruSSia moment
@GuidelinesViolater24 күн бұрын
@@GuidelinesViolater🫵😂
@ggeshundra17 күн бұрын
@GuidelinesViolater Great adding politics here, congratulations (not).
@m.n.o.54621 сағат бұрын
Imagine being a GAME JOURNALIST who doesn’t know how to fuckin’ READ in a GAME TUTORIAL
@FoxheimStudios Жыл бұрын
You don’t need any special training or knowledge to become a game journo. Any moron can review games. The problem I see with that tutorial is that it combines 2 mechanics. Jump and dash. Simple as that tutorial may seem I can come up with a tutorial many people can't get past.
@kissaninja9700 Жыл бұрын
Lmao
@ImNormal0 Жыл бұрын
He's a writer, not a reader.
@AoiHeartStranger Жыл бұрын
@@AoiHeartStranger Rarely did a comment make me laugh like this. Bravo! 😂
@LRM12o8 Жыл бұрын
@@LRM12o8 i stole this joke from somewhere.
@AoiHeartStranger Жыл бұрын
His review later: " the controls are slow and klunky, can't even beat the tutorial"
@THawkMedia4 жыл бұрын
Takahashi even said "the game didin't say that i need to go to the block to get to the cylinder" hes such a dumbass.
@janelleysabelcruz53583 жыл бұрын
@@janelleysabelcruz5358 No he didn't. He owned how bad he was and never blamed the game. He even left that footage up in good humour. Little did he know, gamers have less humour than they have of a life..
@cynical84643 жыл бұрын
@@cynical8464 yeah, sure he did😂
@viniciusgrosse19583 жыл бұрын
@@cynical8464 shut the fuck up.
@JimmyTurner3 жыл бұрын
@@cynical8464 whats humorous about a game journalist not knowing how to play games?
@kushal_2oo43 жыл бұрын
Fun fact: he is game journalist for over 20 years.
@z0nite Жыл бұрын
Yep
@Coffeebomb22791 Жыл бұрын
Fun fact: writing is much more important to journalism than being good at video games. You don't have to be good at sports to be a good sports journalist. And you certainly don't have to be good at one game marketed on its difficulty (a game that actually loses a lot and becomes a lesser single player experience because of its difficulty, no less) to be a good journalist/reviewer. That's like saying a food journalist is bad because they've never had that one pufferfish dish with the death.
@pantslesswrock Жыл бұрын
@@pantslesswrock True, but you should be at least decent or very average at it. Most game journalists, I assume, aren't good at games in respect to gamers. They're just average and that's fine. But seeing journalist like this one in the video is just extremely sad as their incompetence really ruins the experience the developers wants players to feel.
@tofuinacup5161 Жыл бұрын
@@pantslesswrock this is the dumbest comment I’ve ever seen. If you’re this terrible at video games that you can’t beat a tutorial that utilizes the most common mechanics in platforming games than you definitely can’t be trusted to write about the game.
@lukahavelka7875 Жыл бұрын
@@pantslesswrock actually most sports journalists I’ve seen are retired sportsmen who are past their primes and can’t compete anymore. At least all of the good ones. And most if not all food journalists have to be able to cook well in order to judge the difficulty of the dish cooked. I would not trust a single journalist in anything if they are as brain dead in their field as this dude.
@monkaeyes3417 Жыл бұрын
It would be interesting to see how he'd fair against one of those kid's toys where you have to get the shapes through the right holes.
@ExtantThylacine Жыл бұрын
He tried to fit a pentagon through a triangular hole.
@ChloekabanOfficial11 ай бұрын
the square hole
@amewtwofan5 ай бұрын
He'd shove it up his arse
@Wreckedilious2 ай бұрын
@@amewtwofanThat’s right! It goes in the square hole!
@timesnewlogan20322 ай бұрын
He would stare at it for 15 minutes and then ask if he’s supposed to eat the shapes
@zlodevil42628 күн бұрын
I don't know how many times I've read articles from any industry and thought: "Holy crap. If this is what it takes to be a professional writer, then damn near anyone is more qualified for this job than this author." Then I see something like this, where a gaming journalist fails to grasp the basic rules and instructions around a game with a simple concept. This has really solidified me viewpoint that if you're not good at anything, just write about it, and someone will pay you.
@Mongaloose Жыл бұрын
Thats not really fair, if you "arent good at anything" but do a good job writing about things you arent good at, that makes you by definition good at writing. Not defending this guy, but it actually takes a really talented person to write about something they went into blind. Capturing any sort of nuance without years of experience is damn near impossible
@skeetsmcgrew3282 Жыл бұрын
Tbf, they get paid like shit and are expected to beat games in like a few days and write a review. But there's no excusing this level of incompetency displayed in this vid.
@TheDeathby2 Жыл бұрын
@@skeetsmcgrew3282 they aren't good at writing about it.
@NomTheDom Жыл бұрын
@@TheDeathby2 Getting paid to play games, the horror.
@Korijenkins1414 Жыл бұрын
Journalism and matter experts in a nutshell
@TheMegaPingasMobile Жыл бұрын
This looks like the initial stages of an AI trying to learn to play a game
@Maartimer Жыл бұрын
And AI will make it in the end, he is worse than a baby AI
@ashenoneartorias1396 Жыл бұрын
I was looking for this very comment...
@getsideways7257 Жыл бұрын
Tbh a neural network would need longer, but plays the game perfect after the first level
@entropy4959 Жыл бұрын
Except it's Natural, and not intelligence... So N
@janisir4529 Жыл бұрын
LMAO TRUE
@Junqers Жыл бұрын
Even the game knows how ridiculous this is. The music loop ends right as he finally makes the easy jump like “ooh wow, good job, idiot”
@djdeadbeat43804 жыл бұрын
It does! It's so thematically perfect
@cyrus23954 жыл бұрын
Wow, perfect timing 😂
@benjaminolivo34233 жыл бұрын
LMAO
@knuxuki10132 жыл бұрын
coincidences like this actually mindfuck me a bit. even his movement and bullets at the end line up well with the ending of the song.
@modestmouse62 жыл бұрын
Well good job bozo idlot you dumbo ass he isn’t English
@oofgamer64182 жыл бұрын
We've all had these moments playing a video game. But not all of us have used a moment like this to criticize a game and then get paid for it.
@MightyManotaur22 Жыл бұрын
I mightve played like this my first time picking up a controller as a baby. But 20+ years of gaming Journalism and he still plays like a literal toddler, its inexcusable.
@magnesjberg24 Жыл бұрын
my first video game was Sonic 2 at the age of 3 years old, and i still don’t think i’ve ever had any moments like this
@morgboat744 Жыл бұрын
@@magnesjberg2420 years we’ll spend lmao
@youngpasta57227 ай бұрын
Pretty sure I figured it out quicker the first time I picked up Mario, and I was a kid. This guy does not like to play games. He got a writing job involving them because he's also not a good writer.
@bluedistortions4 ай бұрын
Never this bad though
@chiangkaishrek512329 күн бұрын
This video actually makes me feel better about myself. I've always sucked at most games I play, but watching this makes me realise, there's always someone much worse than you.
@vladskiobi Жыл бұрын
Theres always someone out there having it worse.
@magnesjberg24 Жыл бұрын
Just remember that no matter what you do, there's an Asian guy that can do it better and a journalist that will be much worse
@trevorminton6084 Жыл бұрын
If you ever feel useless, remember that he can’t pass a tutorial.
@AngryPlushNest20182 жыл бұрын
no that joke only works when it's not obvious and we didn't know that but we obviously that he can't get through the tutorial so you said the joke wrong
@thejadekatana8891 Жыл бұрын
@@thejadekatana8891 676 people say otherwise my friend
@mariluisa6837 Жыл бұрын
@@thejadekatana8891 R A T I O
@frano7172 Жыл бұрын
@@thejadekatana8891 Idk man ._.
@denacane2778 Жыл бұрын
@@thejadekatana8891 wrong
@Is_mail22 Жыл бұрын
Normally I wouldn't judge someone's overall intelligence just based on playing video games, but because this is someone that literally makes a living doing this, I can't help but do so
@LordParticle Жыл бұрын
Even my mother would be better at this
@herscher1297 Жыл бұрын
Thing is, Dean doesn't specialise in actually playong games more than the tech and business side of things, he just gets invited sometimes to play some games and he has to constantly say that he sucks at games. He is a very casual gamer, he is not good, and this time he sucked a lot more than usual. There is other gameplay videos of him where, while he still sucks, he is competent. Like I say, he is not really payed to play videogames but to report on the other side of gaming
@lovelyyolk9066 Жыл бұрын
@@lovelyyolk9066 playing games for years should make you competent in platformers though.
@silasnebulous4533 Жыл бұрын
my girlfriend brother is like 6 and he did it first try 😭 this shit is ridiculous
@eepiest Жыл бұрын
@@lovelyyolk9066 I'm tryna chill and watch funny videos not review essays *_Goddamn!_*
@SkullChao Жыл бұрын
The fact that he is struggled and don't know what to do but the character in the game is smiling make this super funny
@vell3445 Жыл бұрын
This kzhead.info/sun/mKhuqpmSopWZY6s/bejne.html
@rickparsent9632 Жыл бұрын
His name is Cuphead
@cricky879928 күн бұрын
@cricky8799 To clarify: the character
@NikodAnimations26 күн бұрын
Alt title: Can an AI learn to play Cuphead?
@MemExp2010 Жыл бұрын
Yes, and it can play it better than Dean.
@chrisnichols901411 ай бұрын
@@chrisnichols9014 LMAO
@MemExp201011 ай бұрын
“If you pass this level, your legally skilled”
@GioGospelGamerOfficial2 жыл бұрын
"My legally skilled what?"
@chroma1080 Жыл бұрын
@@chroma1080 wow, you came 13 mins prior to me. You have I‘m respect.
@Knaeckekarl Жыл бұрын
@@Knaeckekarl Wow you came 3 mins prior to me, I'm impressed
@Catmangamer Жыл бұрын
@@Catmangamer wow you came 51 second prior to me,nice
@MaxerV19 Жыл бұрын
"99,9% of people can't beat this level"
@interceptionbug4166 Жыл бұрын
How can a man who plays games for a paycheck not do a tutorial
@dingusmann30034 жыл бұрын
creative name imagine him playing sekiro
@shom9243 жыл бұрын
And it's one of the easiest tutorials ever. I was a little surprised that it was so simple & clear when I first played it because games focused on being hard often have unclear tutorials.
@D_YellowMadness3 жыл бұрын
@Shom ive never heard of Sekrio, is it any good?
@dingusmann30033 жыл бұрын
@@dingusmann3003 yeah it’s pretty fun
@jacobscott72613 жыл бұрын
@@jacobscott7261 ill have to check it out then
@dingusmann30033 жыл бұрын
"Maybe if I jump against this wall for the 52nd time, something will happen?" -Journalist, probably
@DizzyHotSauce Жыл бұрын
"Nah, 52 wasnt enough. Maybe one more is enough? 54 jumps?" -Journalist 3 hours later, probably
@RadiantSharaShaymin Жыл бұрын
Definition of Insanity
@ksksksjs23 күн бұрын
one must imagine game journalist happy
@Sans_The_Skeleton2 ай бұрын
Some of you may not know this, but this man is actually an inspirational figure for depressed people, considering how despite them thinking of themselves as a bunch of failures, they can pull up this video and realise that there are way bigger disappointments roaming around in the sea that is life
@ericwijaya2119 Жыл бұрын
that's smart
@ZphyZphyer Жыл бұрын
They had us in the first half, not gonna lie. Sick burn.
@yokomidrive.6563 Жыл бұрын
Toasted
@liviekumori Жыл бұрын
Roasted
@luckydice3048 Жыл бұрын
I was diagnosed with a heavy form of depression about a month ago and I can confirm that that is unironically true, lol.
@aeolian951 Жыл бұрын
I think the best part about this is that most people, after experimenting with the controls and discovering the air dash, would have figured out the "jump from a high point and dash for lateral movement" within seconds. And that would be without the blatant instructions written on the walls here. I know this because I've seen a toddler who can't read figure this shit out.
@L337N1NJ4L1NK3 жыл бұрын
Unless you're referring to the comparison someone did between this gameplay and his toddler, you should look that up.
I like how he keeps going back to the "JUMP" block, as if to prove something to himself and touch upon that memory of victory still lingering in his mouth. A comfort zone, a time where eveything was simple and straightforward...
@sivanmisgav9468 Жыл бұрын
This right here is why we need actual gamers who can do journalism, not journalists who can attempt to play games they can’t comprehend
@Offbrand._.goat._.cheese Жыл бұрын
Journalists have become a class of people. It's more than just an occupation now; it's a *class.* And they get paid millions of dollars a year to put their brains to the same amount of use as this idiot.
@Emper0rH0rde8 ай бұрын
Niche Gamer and Techraptor.
@prot07ype87Ай бұрын
It amazes me that he genuinely isn't trolling. Even when he finally progresses to standing on the block, he couldn't pass. Then when he does I get hope, until we see him fail and fail on even easier sections. This truly is painful.
@BruhMoment-1267 Жыл бұрын
He also trashed on mass effect because he didn't know you could level up and thought the game was almost impossible
@Chloedasher Жыл бұрын
@@Chloedasher and doom eternal
@CheesenMouse Жыл бұрын
@@Chloedasher Just when I thought it couldn't get worse
@BruhMoment-1267 Жыл бұрын
I wonder what happens if he plays games like Demon souls
@ivaerz4977 Жыл бұрын
The person has 4 hp on the bottom left, if it were someones first time they would have 3 :(
@theslickimpala5308 Жыл бұрын
You know... there are times where I think I'm not very good at video games ...But gaming journalists make me think that maybe I'm not too bad after all lmao
@OneWingedNatu643 жыл бұрын
lmaoooo same
@appleslofistation435 Жыл бұрын
I think is fake, because 4 hp, but if this is real i would be proud that i'm not that bad at games lmao
@ULTRAMUERTE_ULTRAKILLJOJO Жыл бұрын
It's the cuphead demo,its normal that he has 4 hp. It's not a normal copy of the game.
@bybygftt3091 Жыл бұрын
@@ULTRAMUERTE_ULTRAKILLJOJO Sadly it‘s not fake.
@blacky_Ninja Жыл бұрын
@@ULTRAMUERTE_ULTRAKILLJOJO if it was fake then the word would be more peaceful
@lordlopikong6940 Жыл бұрын
The worst part is that it isn't just takahashi. He is just the tip of the iceberg of journalists who shape the video game industry for us (usually for the worse) by creating good or bad optics for newly released games (which affects sales) but are literally too mentally inept to actually play the same video games.
@noname-dp3gn Жыл бұрын
If you're ever playing a game and it has a mode dedicated to just "experiencing the story", this is why.
@kirbymaster510 ай бұрын
It's insane how everytime this guy learns a new move, he forgets the last one. It's like he has the memory of a goldfish or something.
@terencecobain Жыл бұрын
I don't think they forgot they just don't realize they need to apply those moves together
@pumkin610 Жыл бұрын
@@pumkin610 I think he actually forgot
@Tuberex Жыл бұрын
He's probably assuming that he won't need to use his accrued knowledge for the rest of the tutorial
@highjumpstudios2384 Жыл бұрын
He's just button mashing
@NibNa5ty Жыл бұрын
I'd say its more like pokemon
@masterthieveracoon5056 Жыл бұрын
"When you make something idiot-proof, God will make a better idiot." - A comment on a different video that I saw a while ago.
@shizune_ Жыл бұрын
If you can't figure out the tutorial, the game is obviously beyond you.
@FlashDAH Жыл бұрын
😂😂
@_festival Жыл бұрын
No matter how much you dumb it down, there will always be someone too dumb to understand it.
@TinyDeskEngineer Жыл бұрын
"You don't have to include a source for your quotes when you don't remember where they came from" -Abe Lincoln
@SineN0mine3 Жыл бұрын
I came to say this comment is golden Bc you included that you found it somewhere else (standup no to take others credit) …. Then this mf whipps the Abe linkin quote out of no where arguably topping to original comment but overall making the chain perfect.
@sammcgrail3949 Жыл бұрын
The wacky music fading out JUST as he finally figures it out was extremely well-timed
@ASingleSpaghetti Жыл бұрын
I get that tutorials in games can sometimes be a challenge if the tutorial isn't clear about what the player needs to do or if it requires very tight timing with actions but this isn't one of those cases in my opinion. The game provides simple problems for the player and includes not only what buttons needs to be pressed but also provides a short explanation of the action. I get that sometimes getting action correctly can take a few tries. Perhaps the character fell faster than expected and you were late to dash or the game reacted to the button press with a delay. These are things we may need to give a few tries so we can adjust our timing to what the game expects from us. Also, here the game is teaching the player one step at a time. It's not like a 3D combat tutorial with 10+ actions to figure out while trying to ignore how the Y-axis camera isn't what you prefer and you have no access to the menu during the tutorial to change it.
@Mizufluffy Жыл бұрын
If he found cuphead's tutorial hard the guy must've had a mental breakdown in-game.
@OmniversalInsect9 ай бұрын
i love how he just occasionally stops moving entirely, has a few seconds of extreme brain activity to try and figure out how to tackle this extremely complicated problem - just to then fucking fail again
@exiledd Жыл бұрын
I think that he just cannot coordinate his fingers to do what he wants cuz he’s not used to this game. Same happens to me when I can’t pull off a combo in a fighting game so I stop for a sec and try again.
@Gabgabiga Жыл бұрын
@@Gabgabiga He wasn't even jumping or dashing from the right location for the majority of it
@unrelentingpest Жыл бұрын
@@unrelentingpest 🤓
@Gabgabiga Жыл бұрын
@@Gabgabiga I can see learning a moveset in a fighting game because you don't know it prior, but these skills he's missing are core from any platformer. I believe it to be that he doesn't know the controller by second nature, he's most likely looking at the buttons while he plays.
@Kuhtlass Жыл бұрын
@@Kuhtlass Okay. Sorry for bad English😔
@Gabgabiga Жыл бұрын
Remember people: YOU have to go to real work for 8-10 hours. Carry that stuff. Type that math. Serve those customers. While this sad pile of duckey gets paid for *failing at a tutorial a five year old could manage* to THEN give his "professional opinion on it" ... .............. sigh.................
@FizzleFX Жыл бұрын
Lol
@jestfullgremblim8002 Жыл бұрын
Too right, mate. (Typed at a low paying job I dislike, but keep because it's near my elderly mother.)
@allenharper2928 Жыл бұрын
god damn man i feel that shit
@chocoateclake501 Жыл бұрын
I suggest we burn gaming journalism to the ground
@KhoaLe-uc2ny Жыл бұрын
I doubt it pays well.
@astarteswillum5259 Жыл бұрын
My favorite part is halfway through when they discover the Y button
@reedparker599310 ай бұрын
This is why very easy mode is called games journalism mode
@ImmaLittlePip9 ай бұрын
The real tragedy is that we don't have a voice recording. Like take Arin from Game Grumps. He's mad at video games, isn't good at thinking critically, and gets very emotional very quickly. And we know this because he records what he's saying, and he says what he's thinking. What this guy was thinking will forever be a mystery. Did he know what he was supposed to do what is just really bad at it ? Was he completely oblivious to the obvious solution and just a very confused. Did he think that he just miss something? Do he think that if he did what the things were in in the background said if the pillar would just disappear? Was he angry? Did being angry get him in a cycle of failure? Was he not even paying attention? Was he on his phone half playing the game not taking his job seriously? Or did he fail a couple times, think it would be really funny if he purposely kept messing up? did he purposely mess up because he knew that it would frustrate people and get people talking about the article? There's so much information we simply aren't going to get. The inner machinations of this individual's mind will forever be an enigma, an unsolvable mystery.
@alexanderchippel Жыл бұрын
There's a bit you can extrapolate from his actions. My guess is he thought you could double jump for some reason, judging by his constant parry attempts. The guy also has a history of being pretty stubborn and unwilling to adapt, so if he thinks something should work, he'll try again and again constantly until his patience wears thin, hence why he never bothered to read the instructions. His incompetence has also been well documented, so this definitely isn't an intentional goof.
@329link Жыл бұрын
@@329link - Being that stubborn is just terrible for getting through life in general. Life demands you make changes and adapt the to the environment in order to succeed. That's how humanity has survived as long as it has.
@josephb.4640 Жыл бұрын
That's because he wasn't thinking. There was not a single fucking atom in his brain that was functioning properly.
@RushWheeler Жыл бұрын
@@329link this guy’s brain is like a malfunctioning computer. “PREFORM DOUBLE JUMP” “ERROR CANNOT DOUBLE JUMP” “PROCESSING…” “PREFORM DOUBLE JUMP” “ERROR CANNOT DOUBLE JUMP” And so on…
@sporovid5856 Жыл бұрын
Totally agree, but still had an aneurysm reading that
@benjaminmacdavid9359 Жыл бұрын
It’s not that he can’t get past the tutorial part of the game, but the instructions are RIGHT THERE FOR YOU TO READ yet this man STILL has no idea how to beat it Imagine a journalist who writes articles for a living be so stupid enough to not READ what’s on a video game screen
@JayElDragon Жыл бұрын
OMFG like dude it's right above you just do what it says lol
@nsane7208 Жыл бұрын
I just assumed he couldn't read English
@SHAD0WKNITE Жыл бұрын
@@SHAD0WKNITE Even so, there are visible arrows and buttons on the screen. If I saw an arrow point at a dot in the screen and I saw **bold text** under a picture of the “A” button, regardless of language, the game is telling me to press A when I get to that point.
@DriedJizzSock Жыл бұрын
@@DriedJizzSock true
@SHAD0WKNITE Жыл бұрын
@@SHAD0WKNITE reminds me of that one guy who criticized Metroid Dread cause he said the game didn’t tell him where to go, where the room he was stuck him had some enemies in another level, I think it’s gamer instinct to just shoot everywhere when we have no idea what to do These types of people are the ones shit talking cause they suck at video games
@JayElDragon Жыл бұрын
Journalist here. Most gaming journalists I know (admittedly I don’t know too many) are failed sports journalists
@wadedevinney968129 күн бұрын
Most gaming journalists hate gaming and just want to get experience to be a real journalist
@arghpee29 күн бұрын
This man has 2 functioning brain cells and one of them is fighting the other.
@Sephy_ButOnALaptop9 ай бұрын
Both of his brain cells are fighting for third place
@n7x26 күн бұрын
Takahashi- Th man who couldn’t beat this tutorial The man who didn’t know you could level up in Mass Effect The man who spent an hour jumping into a wall and walking into lava in doom eternal because he couldn’t figure out where to go He”s done it all
@dr.k8610 Жыл бұрын
😂😂 this man's track record ...is just wow
@Br08281997 Жыл бұрын
How the hell does he still find work? Is the entire industry full of idiots like him?
@iraqifoodcart8447 Жыл бұрын
Honestly, if he comes out saying he was trolling around some years later, I wouldn't be suprised because how can one be so stupid
@Fuck_handles Жыл бұрын
If you want to know if the game is too hard for your grandma or dog or your grandma's dog, read the Takahashi review.
@axiezimmah Жыл бұрын
That guy bring a shame to japanese people.
@harfiluthfan2050 Жыл бұрын
I want to point out that there's footage of literal children beating the tutorial faster than this dude. The game is like : "Press Y to dash!" And this dude's just like : "What's dashing do?"
@kindwolf7700 Жыл бұрын
bro i literally saw the Y button to dash and i pressed it and then did the jump by accident because i was moving. it’s nearly possible to do the jump WITHOUT dashing, too
@pacifistichuman82649 Жыл бұрын
There's a video of a pigeon completing a task faster than this guy finished this tutorial lmao
@NotSomeJustinWithoutAMoustache Жыл бұрын
If I can beat halo reach on heroic at 6 he can beat a tutorial at 30
@Duckbusinessman Жыл бұрын
He pressed Y to dash many times right away. He had no problem figuring that part out, it was like 3 seconds in. Reading the words that are there was not the issue.
@gavinjenkins899 Жыл бұрын
@@gavinjenkins899 then explain literally the entire minute of him just standing in the corner pressing dash and jumping? He didn’t even stand on the block
@Duckbusinessman Жыл бұрын
I think I found the guy behind all the mobile game ads
@hobx6063 Жыл бұрын
It shouldn't be humanly possible to mess up this bad
@okotan Жыл бұрын
Can this guy read
@toffeeflake5 жыл бұрын
Was wondering the same thing. Like maybe he can’t read English. So all he sees is the buttons.
@sandywolfr265 жыл бұрын
@@sandywolfr26 his review was written in english so he can certainly read.
@FTW12305 жыл бұрын
Green Bandit then there really is no excuse for this sad display.
@sandywolfr265 жыл бұрын
Green Bandit probably translated with google translater
@stepstep8385 жыл бұрын
No
@thelradame55084 жыл бұрын
You know this wouldn’t be so humiliating if it was the AI learning how to play. They probably would’ve done better than this game journalist anyways.
@davidjr3658 Жыл бұрын
Yes well the AI has that I in its definition, the journo only has the A.
@yaelz6043 Жыл бұрын
@@yaelz6043 No, it's still AI, but in this case, it means Artificial Idiot
@wio1 Жыл бұрын
@@wio1 HAHAHA.
@gawagames7877 Жыл бұрын
@@wio1 I stand corrected.
@yaelz6043 Жыл бұрын
@@wio1 Artificial Iridium
@NikodAnimations26 күн бұрын
At last we found who played all those mobile game ads
@HowToChangeName11 ай бұрын
This felt so much longer than 2 minutes 20 seconds
@Fordrake_FangirlАй бұрын
Throw this guy against DSP in Dark Souls 1v1, no backseaters. A battle for the ages.
@rigulur5 жыл бұрын
Just throw him to minecraft in peaceful mode in a mini hole spawn
@damzepher72264 жыл бұрын
Accurate since Cuphead is the run and gun's of dark souls
@realDannyBoi1113 жыл бұрын
Just put him against gundyr, he still won’t win
@jaba47203 жыл бұрын
He couldn’t beat pinwheel
@rnb99043 жыл бұрын
@@jaba4720 he couldn't hardly beat the tutorial, he wouldn't be able to beat any DS boss.
@valravnsshadow94223 жыл бұрын
A journalist does not have to be perfect at games for his opinion to matter; everyone dies to the first goomba sooner or later. But this is like getting a game over to it.
@schwarzerritter57243 жыл бұрын
Nah this is more like the equivalent of getting a game over in a game that doesn't even have a game over
@KhryausOHowl Жыл бұрын
we found the game journo
@rhysjonsmusic Жыл бұрын
@@rhysjonsmusic read the comment again.
@Heavy_Orbital Жыл бұрын
@@KhryausOHowl you sure? It looks more like losing to the loading screen to me
@DylP1ccle Жыл бұрын
@@KhryausOHowl cuphead
@pacifistichuman82649 Жыл бұрын
This is still one of the funniest gaming videos
@Nightcaat5 ай бұрын
i want this guy to beat dark souls
@lucifer31008 ай бұрын
I swear this is like watching an AI learn. Man, you've already tried jumping from the ground eight times, maybe it's time to jump from the block?
@neyte7313 Жыл бұрын
No, I am *ABSOLUTELY CONFIDENT* that an AI can do better than this
@MarcoAdventures Жыл бұрын
I think, when you're not that familiar with how video games in general work, you might intuitively think that the jumps may vary in hight, and that the vertical distance between the left block and the pillar cancels out the hight advantage it would give you.
@TheKorbi Жыл бұрын
This is like being a food critic who keeps stabbing his eyeballs with the fork
@pawbgles Жыл бұрын
Look, youre the one who confused the absentminded oblivious food critic by feedin them fish eye soup; ofc theyll mix up what eyeballs theyre sposed to eat
@SylviaRustyFae Жыл бұрын
It's like a being a food critic who keeps missing his mouth and gets food all over his lap.
@corndog9482 Жыл бұрын
That was fucking creepy and unnecessary but ok
@phantomwarrior8686 Жыл бұрын
@@pawbgles I'm very right and you were being weird
@phantomwarrior8686 Жыл бұрын
@@phantomwarrior8686 As someone who lives weird, OPs comment was not creepy, weird, or unnecessary. It was an apt metaphor.
@SylviaRustyFae Жыл бұрын
It's like the music is making fun of him lol
@Hal343298 ай бұрын
I feel like im watching a struggling animal
@cuckoshroom53942 ай бұрын
This actually hurt me. Not because the simplest thing they can do is read the text behind the screen, but the fact that the devs tried so hard to make it beginner friendly, just to have someone like this fail. For someone who's job is to write up a story, they sure as hell don't know how to read.
@Hexra_ Жыл бұрын
The problem solving clearly isn't there either 😬
@pumkin610 Жыл бұрын
Some people are just born slow…
@Nuthing Жыл бұрын
Do you think when they fought their first boss they rage quitted as soon as they took a hit ten seconds into the fight?
@Keyfur91 Жыл бұрын
@@Keyfur91 no because they couldn't figure out how to reach the Quit option in the menu.
@sam8404 Жыл бұрын
@@sam8404 They probably dont even know where the boss is on the map.
@raulstopspam1791 Жыл бұрын
The only positive thing I can say about letting people who don’t know shit about video games test this shit for review is that you can understand what a brand new person in gaming is going to experience, that being said letting them review games without disclosing they’re bad at games or new to them is such a horrible thing to do because it just hurts the games rating
@bappochan6615 Жыл бұрын
Thing is, he did, he said many times in his report that he sucked at cuphead and that thefootage was shameful
@lovelyyolk9066 Жыл бұрын
@@lovelyyolk9066 why are you in everyone's replies defending him XD you must be the journalist
@jam-no-jelly Жыл бұрын
@@lovelyyolk9066 it's one thing to suck at cuphead, and something else entirely to not comprehend the most basic of videogame language. Because that's what's happening here. He's unable to comprehend videogame language. The game is communicating to you what it wants from you with platforms and arrows and directions. Anyone that has ever played a game before will have at least a vague experience with this. This guy seems to have 0 of that.
@THEPELADOMASTER Жыл бұрын
@@lovelyyolk9066 he doesn't suck at Cuphead he seam to not have any game experience at all
@anargument1192 Жыл бұрын
This is what happens when companies hire based on a college degree than on experience. DSP is more reliable than most games journalists and that's sad. No wonder independent reviewers are thriving.
@followertheleader Жыл бұрын
Whenever I feel like I’m bad at games I always come here to feel better about myself, and it always works.
@tab730225 күн бұрын
the ragtime piano is the best, it's like mocking their stupidity
@daniel.holbrook5 ай бұрын
I love how at 0:56 after the air dash you can hear the gears in his head starting to turn.
@kwedl Жыл бұрын
Yeah, he is one of these people who are so slow you can actually hear the gears turning in their head as they make their next thought.
@holliswilliams8426 Жыл бұрын
Imagine getting paid to play games and being that bad at them lol
@wolfsell6684 Жыл бұрын
@@wolfsell6684 I don't really think they're bad, just do it on purpose, this brings more views than a normal review / article, especially when you pair it with a hot topic (for the audience of these games) such as needing difficulty sliders, pretty much mass baiting elitists and other angry players into reading it just to bash it and thus increase their numbers, people making fun of them is just what they want
@johjoh9270 Жыл бұрын
@@johjoh9270you’re probably right but I still don’t like ign because of they’re bias towards Sony
@wolfsell6684 Жыл бұрын
The moment before a brilliant revelation.
@Stiggandr1 Жыл бұрын
Whenever I feel stupid about dying 100+ times in this game, I watch this and I feel better
@thecrappyportalmaster29632 жыл бұрын
I didnt finish the second isle yet and I have 1100+ deaths
@neodintchly Жыл бұрын
@@neodintchly My death counter hasn’t changed because when I get hit I restart. Fuck S Ranks
@fchef8370 Жыл бұрын
King Dice is the reason why I can't continue. I don't know why I struggle with him, but he's currently been undefeated for nearly three years now
@REDFRLegend Жыл бұрын
@@REDFRLegend king dice is easy you can control your roll with decent enough timing and always land on the hp squares and safe squares
@hhhhhh-vi6sq Жыл бұрын
@@hhhhhh-vi6sq The hard part is getting to him. Either I die in a stupid way, my laptop starts lagging or I have to fight the monkey and I can't beat the monkey!
@REDFRLegend Жыл бұрын
Games need to have a game journalist difficulty option
@am_sousa224629 күн бұрын
This dude literally plays like an AI in the opening stages
@twentyzerosix354811 ай бұрын
It’s like he’s playing blindfolded...
@BrendanJSmith4 жыл бұрын
And his little brother is playing
@personperson73163 жыл бұрын
And his controller is unplugged
@superknuckles95673 жыл бұрын
You can blindfolded defeat every boss in the first isle
@pedzad95283 жыл бұрын
And he's playing with a USB steering wheel
@ratbastard43992 жыл бұрын
The game was so easy he fell asleep while playing it
@IcyDiamond2 жыл бұрын
Given that this isn't even the first enemy and the game outright tells you what to do, this is like being stuck on the title screen of Super Mario Bros, staring at the words "Push Start" for several minutes and not knowing what to do.
@pearofclubs6280 Жыл бұрын
There are worst examples, like being told to press ''any'' button to continue and the ''genius'' decides to press the power button and wonder why it didn't work.
@reborno-o4498 Жыл бұрын
@@reborno-o4498 LOL SO TRUE
@shaneharding7399 Жыл бұрын
@@reborno-o4498 I know that someone, somewhere has had this exact thing happen to them.
@4DDOSED Жыл бұрын
@@reborno-o4498 but at least they do it for the memes most of the time
@telli5868 Жыл бұрын
Five seconds in and I suddenly understand how every college math tutor feels
@neroidius69154 ай бұрын
One must imagine Dean Takahashi happy. Il Faut Imaginer Dean Takeahashi Heureux.
@sel99818 ай бұрын
Me: Man the first boss is hard! This guy: HoLd My BeAr
@MrSpy130115 жыл бұрын
hold my bear
@SJC825 жыл бұрын
@@SJC82 I'll hold it alright
@garygotgameclips4 жыл бұрын
A whole ass bear
@StainedStarchild4 жыл бұрын
Scold my beer
@lilfoot48374 жыл бұрын
I would say to any one that says that meme is an idiot
@bruceflummer61893 жыл бұрын
Being a full percenter and speedrunner of Cuphead, this not just shocked me but made me feel pain the more I watched.
@padgodlol6063 Жыл бұрын
I don't even play Cuphead and this made me feel physical pain. These pillocks shouldn't be allowed near any platformers, much less any of my favorite games, like Rain World. If a game journalist is talking about Rain World, no he isn't
@JetFalcon710 Жыл бұрын
@@JetFalcon710 based rain world enjoyer
@obeeked1385 Жыл бұрын
@@obeeked1385 Yeah, it's pretty fun after you've accepted that death is inevitable
@JetFalcon710 Жыл бұрын
Post your cuphead speedrun pls
@Hulijingjinx Жыл бұрын
@@Hulijingjinx I don't have i on computer, I would speedrun on switch so sadly I can't. sorry
@padgodlol6063 Жыл бұрын
When Im feeling down I come back to this video. To remind myself, I cant ever possibly be this bad.
@ghosthugcentral382011 ай бұрын
Games journalists never had their asses kicked by brutally hard early gen console games and it shows.
@Stiggandr1 Жыл бұрын
This is like one of the overly long jokes in family guy. The one's that start out funny, but as they go on get kinda annoying, then become funny again!
@kirbysuperstar54942 жыл бұрын
"This is like that time I tried playing cuphead!"
@tylerlackey1175 Жыл бұрын
“Hey Lois, remember that time I went to the white room with that ‘Cup Head’ guy?”
@huhreally5771 Жыл бұрын
"then become funny again!" Family Guy??
@mechadeka Жыл бұрын
Tried giving this part to a friend who very rarely play games and they managed it on second attempt. This dude is a professional videogame reviewer 🤣
@hitrapperandartistdababy3 жыл бұрын
"professional"
@thaias9654 Жыл бұрын
If they can't even beat a simple 2 button press jump for more than 20 seconds I don't think they can review the game cuz fucking their so fucking shit at the game, a toddler can do better than this shitty reviewers. Really makes my blood boil considering the fact that reviews like this can't even make past the tutorial only to review it saying it's "hard",fucking GET GOOD then, you are a GAME JOURNALIST your job is to be good at games before you criticize it!
@metal9076 Жыл бұрын
And then after that, he gives his "professional" opinion
@MarcoAdventures Жыл бұрын
This guy has the critical thinking skills of a wasp
@LGMLGK3G9 ай бұрын
It's always crazy to me how as a dedicated learner/gamer, I want to read everything I possibly can to learn what does what, but most people brand new to a game seem to be against something as simple as reading a tutorial. Let alone while being in a noobie position where they *need* that help the most.
@NotJarrod Жыл бұрын
Most toddler gamers now adays need handholding. Like they can barely read anyway. I remember when games didnt tell you shit, you had to learn by yourself. Trial by fire
@magnesjberg24 Жыл бұрын
@@magnesjberg24 if anything I kinda liked that even when I was a kid (been playing since a young age). It made me proud when I was able to play harder "big kid" games. But I will also admit, it's important for there to be easy games out there to bridge the gap between beginner gamers and more dedicated ones.
@NotJarrod Жыл бұрын
@@NotJarrod thats what we call the feeling of acomplishment, to overcome your struggles and suceed. to improve yourself and your knowledge/experince. this goes for everything in life. not just games. litterly, git gud
@magnesjberg24 Жыл бұрын
@@NotJarrod i agree that games doesnt need to be hard to be fun. there are plenty of silly relaxing games out there that give great enjoyment. but the most logical solution to people whining about a game being too hard or too easy is a difficulty setting, where you're free to choose however you want to play.
@magnesjberg24 Жыл бұрын
We joke about how game journalists want the games to hold their hands the whole way through, but clearly that’s not enough. The Cuphead tutorial literally spells out everything it wants from you. These idiots just want the game to play itself.
@JustAnArrogantAlien2 жыл бұрын
They should convert to reviewing movies instead
@minersheep8285 Жыл бұрын
@@minersheep8285 Nah, his taste in movies is probably shit 💀
@kris_something Жыл бұрын
@@minersheep8285 “this movie was too complicated for me. Couldn’t get past the opening sequence”
@ninjafrog6966 Жыл бұрын
Sonic forces game of the year
@muddashucka9743 Жыл бұрын
It's not even being bad at gaming at this point. They're just dense.
@dartbaguette2312 Жыл бұрын
When the journalists play so much FPS games they forget how to play platformers:
@kamimatsuyama4 жыл бұрын
This same man played doom eternal, He barely got to the shooting, He still has trouble with platforming.
@gagejohnathan96414 жыл бұрын
Even ppl who play FPS games know how to do that 😂
@janely_euphoria3 жыл бұрын
Exactly what I was going to say
@ragimm.11433 жыл бұрын
You should see the same guy's doom eternal game play.
@evangoodman96583 жыл бұрын
This same journalist also uploaded gameplay of doom eternal and it was the most painful thing I’ve ever sat through
@ninjafrog6966 Жыл бұрын
The old timey music is just a cherry on top, truly makes this more comedic than it should be
@Mr-Troll60 Жыл бұрын
I swear my blood pressure rises a little more every second I watch it
@okay_okay_22 күн бұрын
As a kid when I first started playing platformer games like mega man z I always had a lingering doubt in the back of my mind regarding how far I'd be able to with a jump followed by an air dash/series of wall jumps or if I'd be able to make it to a certain platform without falling to my death so I tended to miss out on certain items and consulted guides to be extra sure it was safe to jump This on the other hand is ...something else entirely
@indranilroy4822 Жыл бұрын
Ok but the MMZ games slapped and the dash, dash jump, wall jumps, dash wall jumps all felt so fucking good tho. Smoothest GBA controls of all time.
@FJ_Beaujangles Жыл бұрын
@@FJ_Beaujangles I agree, it's just that this was my general situation for any platformer game with dash and jump mechanics on any console where my main worry was just timing the inputs right and now looking back this was actually more of a problem with me for the mega man x and metroid (for shinespark parts) games and it didn't help either that I only played them on phone emulators so adjusting to the controls took time
@indranilroy4822 Жыл бұрын
@@indranilroy4822 Understandable. If you still emulate on your phone some people don't know you can pair an xbox one and I think even switch pro controller with Bluetooth. If you have one lying around it helps a lot
@FJ_Beaujangles Жыл бұрын
@@indranilroy4822 ps4 controllers can also bluetooth to phones
@Niko-oe9qo Жыл бұрын
I mean, that's completely fair. I didn't really have access to the internet back when I first played MMZ3 (my first Zero game) and that GBA screen is really small. Some of the jumps you're expected to make with that screen space are a bit much
@VelvetAura Жыл бұрын
I wanna hear his review, or at least what he said about it. I bet it sounded something like “Although they did promise this game would be really hard, I wasn’t expecting how far they’d go with this. For a tutorial, they made it tough as nails to pass. I bet it was harder than the hardest dark souls dark souls boss. A tutorial is meant to get you into game but for Cuphead, not even the smartest person could get past this. I had to keep trying and trying and trying to get it right until I got past it. The only reason I got past because I just was really lucky. So far, Cuphead is a 1 out of 10, as in they don’t have good difficulty balance, and didn’t care about fairness and only cared about if the game was impossible.”
@SquallyCoin5664 Жыл бұрын
That sounds like a ign review
@amberatilano6718 Жыл бұрын
He actually said that he enjoyed his time with it, and admitted that this gameplay of him failing the tutorial is quite shameful.
@uldrs Жыл бұрын
His actual review was like "I don't play games very often, but the company I work for wants me to publish gameplay of Cuphead because a lot of people are excited for the game, so here are my embarrassing 10 minutes of Cuphead.
@Fi___ Жыл бұрын
@@Fi___ an actual respectable journalist being honest? Where did more like him go?
@phantom8926 Жыл бұрын
The state of videogame journalism.
@sayno2lolzisback Жыл бұрын
The sad thing is that this journalist did a good review and said he didn't know how to play these games, he owned his mistakes and didn't blame the game but the internet still keeps humiliating the guy and using him to shit on other game journalists.
@creativename256726 күн бұрын
By every second i watched this video, it felt as if my face was slowly painting itself with clown makeup.
@z33iihh Жыл бұрын
I know a few gaming journos around Quebec City and Montreal. The main issue the profession has is that you don't really start as a gamer; you start your journalism career as a writer. Then you land yourself a few reporting gigs, someone from the Tech section notices you sophomorically futzing around with a handheld, and figures "'Hey, that guy looks like a gamer! I'll ask him about writing a games review column every X days!" So you end up with a guy who has bigger headlines to cover (mergers and acquisitions, prototypes, breakthroughs in consumer tech, etc) who *maybe* has a few hours a month to begrudgingly put on a game he might not even be interested in. This is the end result. Dean Takahashi cannot pass Cuphead's tutorial level because he has no professional incentive to do so. He doesn't need to be informative; he just needs to produce a take that can be integrated in his site's publishing queue on time. He doesn't need to be good at the game - and doesn't even need to *care*. Of course, the opposite end is GameSpot, where you sort of get the sense that there's some work that's been actually done, but that it's all swallowed by the need to give the tentpole releases the exact kinds of big scores that'll keep the site afloat in sponsorships. In-between, you've got a lot of KZheadrs and smaller vloggers - and this is where I'd say you find honest, workable and valuable games criticism.
@McSquiddington Жыл бұрын
Around Quebec AND Montreal? I'm hoping you mean Quebec City cuz bruh Montreal is in Quebec 💀
@stuffwithsoph8264 Жыл бұрын
@@stuffwithsoph8264 Yes, I did mean Quebec City. I apologize if it wasn't clear enough, I'm an ESL speaker and had a brain fart. Just called Quebec City "Quebec" seeing as that's what we do in French.
@McSquiddington Жыл бұрын
@@McSquiddington Had no clue Quebecois only say Quebec when referencing the city, neat.
@stuffwithsoph8264 Жыл бұрын
@@stuffwithsoph8264 The more you know, right?
@McSquiddington Жыл бұрын
Holy shit, precisely this. Don’t get me wrong, the gameplay here can still be questionable, but i think so many people who grew up playing games massively overestimate just how much subconscious habits and lessons get engrained into by playing games as a kid. Recently tried to get some friends who really never play video games at all into some that I thought they’d enjoy, and whilst I made a conscious effort to be as explanatory as possible, often the parts that confused them most, or had them stumble the most, were aspects I hadn’t even thought about. Things like combining actions like moving and jumping, or even where certain settings where in menus. They aren’t stupid, they just haven’t had these experiences drilled into them at a young age, and I think a lot of people in these comments completely forget that.
@chozo1176 Жыл бұрын
- This dude dashed his head into the wall MULTIPLE times assuming that it would eventually work - If he had used more than 2 of his braincells he could get over the wall in three seconds - There is a goddamn arrow pointing to where you should dash to get to the platform - This dude has to be on all the drugs at once to not put the pieces together - I’ve failed this jump before. Just once tho shhhh - The music stopped comedically at the same time he got over the wall - I still think about this clip every time I think I’m bad at video games. It’s been four years - I’m surprised he finished the parry section in a shorter amount of time - I fear for the day he escapes the tutorial only to die at the first boss
@chiachimariachi4682 Жыл бұрын
My grandfather who lives in the province, who's only used a fliphone and a TV, after a simple explanation of the controls beat not only the tutorial but AN ACTUAL BOSS
@MarcoAdventures Жыл бұрын
U need to wise up
@user-jw2mu6vb3l Жыл бұрын
bro would miss with the chaser
@bruhchannel12167 ай бұрын
This will be a timeless reminder that I'll NEVER stop laughing about.
@CyphersBasement7 ай бұрын
When you can't beat the tutorial before the background music loops, you know it's basically already over.
@luciuscapricious6833 жыл бұрын
this is the same man who jumped around in circles in Doom Eternal and didnt know you could level up in Mass Effect 💀 I am flabbergasted as to how this man still has his job after 21 YEARS
@AX11211 Жыл бұрын
I'm surprised HES IN HIS FUCKING 30s
@MarcoAdventures Жыл бұрын
@@MarcoAdventures he's been a gaming journalist since his MID TEENS?
@3agle280 Жыл бұрын
@@MarcoAdventures Wait, this man isn’t a boomer? I would expect this level of ineptitude from a much older person, not from what is supposed to be a fairly young millennial.
@peggedyourdad9560 Жыл бұрын
@@peggedyourdad9560 There's these old ladies on the internet streaming themselves playing games like Skyrim. Age has nothing to do with it. This just really seems like someone who has zero interest in games and refuses to research their job but will still do the work.
@mnArqal93 Жыл бұрын
@@mnArqal93 I know, I just meant that it's more common and acceptable for older individuals to have a tough time getting the hang of video games. Not, that it would be impossible for an old person to play them.
@peggedyourdad9560 Жыл бұрын
I’m a super idiot with memory troubles and I was pretty happy with getting through the tutorial smoothly. I can definitely tell you that his brain is not comprehending the words or objects here.
@aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa790 Жыл бұрын
The music fits so well. Especially when he finally makes it over the dash
People like these are the ones who make final decision in GOTY awards.
People like this are the reason The Last of Us 2 won Game of the Year.
@@inilthfirescales1287 They were probably able to get through the game on Easy mode with all the aids on
@@inilthfirescales1287 shit game, hate it when jessica did the doobly doo what huh??????
And that is why none of us should pay attention to Game of the Year awards. Or any other awards, really.
Yeah but Control was a pretty good game
The longer I watch this, the more surprised I am that this guy even made it past the main menu.
"Press start to begin" What can this even mean ?
@@crash-testproductions9341 *presses PC startup button
@@uselesstable2058 What? It didnt work? Hold on i know! Im gonna start my car and it will turn on!
@@Lillianz2012 It didn't work, I'm going to turn on the nuclear bomb so it starts.
@@user-zv8li5ix7t Dam, it isn't working still? Oh, I have to turn on my BEAN MACHINE
I like how this singular guy basically annihilated the reputation of game journalism online
There are many videos of gaming journalists failing to understand the most foundational concepts of the games they are playing, and then turning around and writing about it as if they are experienced experts.
It was tarnished long before that but yeah, this helped a lot reaching the finish line
@@miloinindo true, but this is pretty bad
If game journalism was a old man in the hospital, this guy took the plug off
@@miloinindo yea like doom
Gaming journalist is such an interesting profession. Being terrible at both gaming and journalism, yet still doing both is really fascinating.
The cuphead guy isn’t even a game journalist though. But no one bothered to research that cos the internet is full of retards.
Reminds me of the redfall gameplay
FACTS
They only know how to gaslight you 😂
It really gets me thinking, your job its literally PLAY A VIDEOGAME, IT CAN BE HARD, BUT YOU ARE EARNING FOR THIS, H O W you can earn for something that 95% of who play videogames PAY to do, and yet, you can be worst that a 6 year old child at your WORK.
I always found it strange that people who end up as _gaming journalists_ somehow don't have the critical thinking skills needed to play games, AKA most of their jobs.
That's because they are the rejects from the pool of political journalists and not gamers.
What do you need to study to be a game journalist anyways? Seems you can graduate without playing a single videogame
@@JorjIto12872 you need to study how best to slam your readers so they get pissed off and talk about you more. It's not about gaming or journalism, it's about cash and pandering.
@@329link - Wait, really? So they LITERALLY aren't even equipped to properly analyze the content they're reviewing? You're telling me that game journalism...was always a self-serving scam? Somehow, I'm both dumbfounded and unsurprised.
@@329link you just described most journalism though.
I think we found the dude playing on all those mobile game ads.
_Oh No no, No!_
This is the best comment.
WE FOUND EM
Holy shit YES DUDE IT IS TOTALLY This muthafuckah right here I swear
that's almost true mobile ads are even more dumb than this but this mkan get dangerously close
I love that when this first came out they tried to explain it with "he's our strategy game reviewer, he doesn't specialize in platformers!". I'm pretty sure I could've beaten this at age 5.
Couldnt they gotten someone elses gameplay who atleast is semi competent? Like, just call in your gamertard son to do the gameplay for the review. 20+ years of gaming Journalism is inexcusable.
Some guy actually recorded his 6-year-old daughter playing this tutorial for the first time, and she did it faster than this guy.
@@magnesjberg24 IIRC this was recorded at some live event where they had only sent this one reporter. Who "didn't specialize in platformers" but since he was there and Cuphead was brand new, he decided to capture some footage. You'd think anyone who's ever played a video game would have the self awareness to see how bad the footage is though.
@@poika22 thats very unprofessional. i would be ashamed if that was my footage
Oh yeah, he’s definitely a strategy game guy, put him in a strategy game and he definitely won’t use a support move on an enemy
I love how music starts anew at 1:30 just as he stumbles on the next obstacle. It's like the game's saying, "here we go again!"
You just made this video 50 times more hilarious for me.
aint nobody getting stuck in the tutorial long enough for the music track to repeat itself 💀 this dude...
"new music, new obstacle"
I shared the clip to my housemate and read this comment as I heard the music reach that point. 😂
777 LIKES DONT CHANGE IT
Fun Fact : For journalists, this is considered a Speedrun.
nobody has beat his record yet
@@bootscats2928 That's because he's still setting it
@@The_Catalin lol
@@The_Catalin some say to this day he is still playing the tutorial
He really knows how to save frames
I'm struggling to believe this is real. The "mistakes" he makes don't even make sense half the time. It's like watching someone who is totally normal, but like, drunk or something.
@Ghost I've seen people try to use fine motor skills like "walking" while drunk and it's kind of similar to this, really.
@@Selrisitai I recently played cuphead drunk, wasn't that bad, made almost the same progress as usual
@@theRPGmaster Did you play it for the first time? And how drunk were you?
@@theRPGmaster how drunk where you tho?
@@Selrisitai Not for the first time, but after a 1y break. It was about 6-7 beers in (alc.5%)
Me after the lobotomy
LMAOOOOO
ruSSia moment
@@GuidelinesViolater🫵😂
@GuidelinesViolater Great adding politics here, congratulations (not).
Imagine being a GAME JOURNALIST who doesn’t know how to fuckin’ READ in a GAME TUTORIAL
You don’t need any special training or knowledge to become a game journo. Any moron can review games. The problem I see with that tutorial is that it combines 2 mechanics. Jump and dash. Simple as that tutorial may seem I can come up with a tutorial many people can't get past.
Lmao
He's a writer, not a reader.
@@AoiHeartStranger Rarely did a comment make me laugh like this. Bravo! 😂
@@LRM12o8 i stole this joke from somewhere.
His review later: " the controls are slow and klunky, can't even beat the tutorial"
Takahashi even said "the game didin't say that i need to go to the block to get to the cylinder" hes such a dumbass.
@@janelleysabelcruz5358 No he didn't. He owned how bad he was and never blamed the game. He even left that footage up in good humour. Little did he know, gamers have less humour than they have of a life..
@@cynical8464 yeah, sure he did😂
@@cynical8464 shut the fuck up.
@@cynical8464 whats humorous about a game journalist not knowing how to play games?
Fun fact: he is game journalist for over 20 years.
Yep
Fun fact: writing is much more important to journalism than being good at video games. You don't have to be good at sports to be a good sports journalist. And you certainly don't have to be good at one game marketed on its difficulty (a game that actually loses a lot and becomes a lesser single player experience because of its difficulty, no less) to be a good journalist/reviewer. That's like saying a food journalist is bad because they've never had that one pufferfish dish with the death.
@@pantslesswrock True, but you should be at least decent or very average at it. Most game journalists, I assume, aren't good at games in respect to gamers. They're just average and that's fine. But seeing journalist like this one in the video is just extremely sad as their incompetence really ruins the experience the developers wants players to feel.
@@pantslesswrock this is the dumbest comment I’ve ever seen. If you’re this terrible at video games that you can’t beat a tutorial that utilizes the most common mechanics in platforming games than you definitely can’t be trusted to write about the game.
@@pantslesswrock actually most sports journalists I’ve seen are retired sportsmen who are past their primes and can’t compete anymore. At least all of the good ones. And most if not all food journalists have to be able to cook well in order to judge the difficulty of the dish cooked. I would not trust a single journalist in anything if they are as brain dead in their field as this dude.
It would be interesting to see how he'd fair against one of those kid's toys where you have to get the shapes through the right holes.
He tried to fit a pentagon through a triangular hole.
the square hole
He'd shove it up his arse
@@amewtwofanThat’s right! It goes in the square hole!
He would stare at it for 15 minutes and then ask if he’s supposed to eat the shapes
I don't know how many times I've read articles from any industry and thought: "Holy crap. If this is what it takes to be a professional writer, then damn near anyone is more qualified for this job than this author." Then I see something like this, where a gaming journalist fails to grasp the basic rules and instructions around a game with a simple concept. This has really solidified me viewpoint that if you're not good at anything, just write about it, and someone will pay you.
Thats not really fair, if you "arent good at anything" but do a good job writing about things you arent good at, that makes you by definition good at writing. Not defending this guy, but it actually takes a really talented person to write about something they went into blind. Capturing any sort of nuance without years of experience is damn near impossible
Tbf, they get paid like shit and are expected to beat games in like a few days and write a review. But there's no excusing this level of incompetency displayed in this vid.
@@skeetsmcgrew3282 they aren't good at writing about it.
@@TheDeathby2 Getting paid to play games, the horror.
Journalism and matter experts in a nutshell
This looks like the initial stages of an AI trying to learn to play a game
And AI will make it in the end, he is worse than a baby AI
I was looking for this very comment...
Tbh a neural network would need longer, but plays the game perfect after the first level
Except it's Natural, and not intelligence... So N
LMAO TRUE
Even the game knows how ridiculous this is. The music loop ends right as he finally makes the easy jump like “ooh wow, good job, idiot”
It does! It's so thematically perfect
Wow, perfect timing 😂
LMAO
coincidences like this actually mindfuck me a bit. even his movement and bullets at the end line up well with the ending of the song.
Well good job bozo idlot you dumbo ass he isn’t English
We've all had these moments playing a video game. But not all of us have used a moment like this to criticize a game and then get paid for it.
I mightve played like this my first time picking up a controller as a baby. But 20+ years of gaming Journalism and he still plays like a literal toddler, its inexcusable.
my first video game was Sonic 2 at the age of 3 years old, and i still don’t think i’ve ever had any moments like this
@@magnesjberg2420 years we’ll spend lmao
Pretty sure I figured it out quicker the first time I picked up Mario, and I was a kid. This guy does not like to play games. He got a writing job involving them because he's also not a good writer.
Never this bad though
This video actually makes me feel better about myself. I've always sucked at most games I play, but watching this makes me realise, there's always someone much worse than you.
Theres always someone out there having it worse.
Just remember that no matter what you do, there's an Asian guy that can do it better and a journalist that will be much worse
If you ever feel useless, remember that he can’t pass a tutorial.
no that joke only works when it's not obvious and we didn't know that but we obviously that he can't get through the tutorial so you said the joke wrong
@@thejadekatana8891 676 people say otherwise my friend
@@thejadekatana8891 R A T I O
@@thejadekatana8891 Idk man ._.
@@thejadekatana8891 wrong
Normally I wouldn't judge someone's overall intelligence just based on playing video games, but because this is someone that literally makes a living doing this, I can't help but do so
Even my mother would be better at this
Thing is, Dean doesn't specialise in actually playong games more than the tech and business side of things, he just gets invited sometimes to play some games and he has to constantly say that he sucks at games. He is a very casual gamer, he is not good, and this time he sucked a lot more than usual. There is other gameplay videos of him where, while he still sucks, he is competent. Like I say, he is not really payed to play videogames but to report on the other side of gaming
@@lovelyyolk9066 playing games for years should make you competent in platformers though.
my girlfriend brother is like 6 and he did it first try 😭 this shit is ridiculous
@@lovelyyolk9066 I'm tryna chill and watch funny videos not review essays *_Goddamn!_*
The fact that he is struggled and don't know what to do but the character in the game is smiling make this super funny
This kzhead.info/sun/mKhuqpmSopWZY6s/bejne.html
His name is Cuphead
@cricky8799 To clarify: the character
Alt title: Can an AI learn to play Cuphead?
Yes, and it can play it better than Dean.
@@chrisnichols9014 LMAO
“If you pass this level, your legally skilled”
"My legally skilled what?"
@@chroma1080 wow, you came 13 mins prior to me. You have I‘m respect.
@@Knaeckekarl Wow you came 3 mins prior to me, I'm impressed
@@Catmangamer wow you came 51 second prior to me,nice
"99,9% of people can't beat this level"
How can a man who plays games for a paycheck not do a tutorial
creative name imagine him playing sekiro
And it's one of the easiest tutorials ever. I was a little surprised that it was so simple & clear when I first played it because games focused on being hard often have unclear tutorials.
@Shom ive never heard of Sekrio, is it any good?
@@dingusmann3003 yeah it’s pretty fun
@@jacobscott7261 ill have to check it out then
"Maybe if I jump against this wall for the 52nd time, something will happen?" -Journalist, probably
"Nah, 52 wasnt enough. Maybe one more is enough? 54 jumps?" -Journalist 3 hours later, probably
Definition of Insanity
one must imagine game journalist happy
Some of you may not know this, but this man is actually an inspirational figure for depressed people, considering how despite them thinking of themselves as a bunch of failures, they can pull up this video and realise that there are way bigger disappointments roaming around in the sea that is life
that's smart
They had us in the first half, not gonna lie. Sick burn.
Toasted
Roasted
I was diagnosed with a heavy form of depression about a month ago and I can confirm that that is unironically true, lol.
I think the best part about this is that most people, after experimenting with the controls and discovering the air dash, would have figured out the "jump from a high point and dash for lateral movement" within seconds. And that would be without the blatant instructions written on the walls here. I know this because I've seen a toddler who can't read figure this shit out.
Unless you're referring to the comparison someone did between this gameplay and his toddler, you should look that up.
@@drakematsen4978 kzhead.info/sun/m6dtdpqbq3eFZ58/bejne.html
@@drakematsen4978 it's up on youtube?
@@Decidueye9147 it is
@@bloodhoundo9320 can you send the link?
I like how he keeps going back to the "JUMP" block, as if to prove something to himself and touch upon that memory of victory still lingering in his mouth. A comfort zone, a time where eveything was simple and straightforward...
This right here is why we need actual gamers who can do journalism, not journalists who can attempt to play games they can’t comprehend
Journalists have become a class of people. It's more than just an occupation now; it's a *class.* And they get paid millions of dollars a year to put their brains to the same amount of use as this idiot.
Niche Gamer and Techraptor.
It amazes me that he genuinely isn't trolling. Even when he finally progresses to standing on the block, he couldn't pass. Then when he does I get hope, until we see him fail and fail on even easier sections. This truly is painful.
He also trashed on mass effect because he didn't know you could level up and thought the game was almost impossible
@@Chloedasher and doom eternal
@@Chloedasher Just when I thought it couldn't get worse
I wonder what happens if he plays games like Demon souls
The person has 4 hp on the bottom left, if it were someones first time they would have 3 :(
You know... there are times where I think I'm not very good at video games ...But gaming journalists make me think that maybe I'm not too bad after all lmao
lmaoooo same
I think is fake, because 4 hp, but if this is real i would be proud that i'm not that bad at games lmao
It's the cuphead demo,its normal that he has 4 hp. It's not a normal copy of the game.
@@ULTRAMUERTE_ULTRAKILLJOJO Sadly it‘s not fake.
@@ULTRAMUERTE_ULTRAKILLJOJO if it was fake then the word would be more peaceful
The worst part is that it isn't just takahashi. He is just the tip of the iceberg of journalists who shape the video game industry for us (usually for the worse) by creating good or bad optics for newly released games (which affects sales) but are literally too mentally inept to actually play the same video games.
If you're ever playing a game and it has a mode dedicated to just "experiencing the story", this is why.
It's insane how everytime this guy learns a new move, he forgets the last one. It's like he has the memory of a goldfish or something.
I don't think they forgot they just don't realize they need to apply those moves together
@@pumkin610 I think he actually forgot
He's probably assuming that he won't need to use his accrued knowledge for the rest of the tutorial
He's just button mashing
I'd say its more like pokemon
"When you make something idiot-proof, God will make a better idiot." - A comment on a different video that I saw a while ago.
If you can't figure out the tutorial, the game is obviously beyond you.
😂😂
No matter how much you dumb it down, there will always be someone too dumb to understand it.
"You don't have to include a source for your quotes when you don't remember where they came from" -Abe Lincoln
I came to say this comment is golden Bc you included that you found it somewhere else (standup no to take others credit) …. Then this mf whipps the Abe linkin quote out of no where arguably topping to original comment but overall making the chain perfect.
The wacky music fading out JUST as he finally figures it out was extremely well-timed
I get that tutorials in games can sometimes be a challenge if the tutorial isn't clear about what the player needs to do or if it requires very tight timing with actions but this isn't one of those cases in my opinion. The game provides simple problems for the player and includes not only what buttons needs to be pressed but also provides a short explanation of the action. I get that sometimes getting action correctly can take a few tries. Perhaps the character fell faster than expected and you were late to dash or the game reacted to the button press with a delay. These are things we may need to give a few tries so we can adjust our timing to what the game expects from us. Also, here the game is teaching the player one step at a time. It's not like a 3D combat tutorial with 10+ actions to figure out while trying to ignore how the Y-axis camera isn't what you prefer and you have no access to the menu during the tutorial to change it.
If he found cuphead's tutorial hard the guy must've had a mental breakdown in-game.
i love how he just occasionally stops moving entirely, has a few seconds of extreme brain activity to try and figure out how to tackle this extremely complicated problem - just to then fucking fail again
I think that he just cannot coordinate his fingers to do what he wants cuz he’s not used to this game. Same happens to me when I can’t pull off a combo in a fighting game so I stop for a sec and try again.
@@Gabgabiga He wasn't even jumping or dashing from the right location for the majority of it
@@unrelentingpest 🤓
@@Gabgabiga I can see learning a moveset in a fighting game because you don't know it prior, but these skills he's missing are core from any platformer. I believe it to be that he doesn't know the controller by second nature, he's most likely looking at the buttons while he plays.
@@Kuhtlass Okay. Sorry for bad English😔
Remember people: YOU have to go to real work for 8-10 hours. Carry that stuff. Type that math. Serve those customers. While this sad pile of duckey gets paid for *failing at a tutorial a five year old could manage* to THEN give his "professional opinion on it" ... .............. sigh.................
Lol
Too right, mate. (Typed at a low paying job I dislike, but keep because it's near my elderly mother.)
god damn man i feel that shit
I suggest we burn gaming journalism to the ground
I doubt it pays well.
My favorite part is halfway through when they discover the Y button
This is why very easy mode is called games journalism mode
The real tragedy is that we don't have a voice recording. Like take Arin from Game Grumps. He's mad at video games, isn't good at thinking critically, and gets very emotional very quickly. And we know this because he records what he's saying, and he says what he's thinking. What this guy was thinking will forever be a mystery. Did he know what he was supposed to do what is just really bad at it ? Was he completely oblivious to the obvious solution and just a very confused. Did he think that he just miss something? Do he think that if he did what the things were in in the background said if the pillar would just disappear? Was he angry? Did being angry get him in a cycle of failure? Was he not even paying attention? Was he on his phone half playing the game not taking his job seriously? Or did he fail a couple times, think it would be really funny if he purposely kept messing up? did he purposely mess up because he knew that it would frustrate people and get people talking about the article? There's so much information we simply aren't going to get. The inner machinations of this individual's mind will forever be an enigma, an unsolvable mystery.
There's a bit you can extrapolate from his actions. My guess is he thought you could double jump for some reason, judging by his constant parry attempts. The guy also has a history of being pretty stubborn and unwilling to adapt, so if he thinks something should work, he'll try again and again constantly until his patience wears thin, hence why he never bothered to read the instructions. His incompetence has also been well documented, so this definitely isn't an intentional goof.
@@329link - Being that stubborn is just terrible for getting through life in general. Life demands you make changes and adapt the to the environment in order to succeed. That's how humanity has survived as long as it has.
That's because he wasn't thinking. There was not a single fucking atom in his brain that was functioning properly.
@@329link this guy’s brain is like a malfunctioning computer. “PREFORM DOUBLE JUMP” “ERROR CANNOT DOUBLE JUMP” “PROCESSING…” “PREFORM DOUBLE JUMP” “ERROR CANNOT DOUBLE JUMP” And so on…
Totally agree, but still had an aneurysm reading that
It’s not that he can’t get past the tutorial part of the game, but the instructions are RIGHT THERE FOR YOU TO READ yet this man STILL has no idea how to beat it Imagine a journalist who writes articles for a living be so stupid enough to not READ what’s on a video game screen
OMFG like dude it's right above you just do what it says lol
I just assumed he couldn't read English
@@SHAD0WKNITE Even so, there are visible arrows and buttons on the screen. If I saw an arrow point at a dot in the screen and I saw **bold text** under a picture of the “A” button, regardless of language, the game is telling me to press A when I get to that point.
@@DriedJizzSock true
@@SHAD0WKNITE reminds me of that one guy who criticized Metroid Dread cause he said the game didn’t tell him where to go, where the room he was stuck him had some enemies in another level, I think it’s gamer instinct to just shoot everywhere when we have no idea what to do These types of people are the ones shit talking cause they suck at video games
Journalist here. Most gaming journalists I know (admittedly I don’t know too many) are failed sports journalists
Most gaming journalists hate gaming and just want to get experience to be a real journalist
This man has 2 functioning brain cells and one of them is fighting the other.
Both of his brain cells are fighting for third place
Takahashi- Th man who couldn’t beat this tutorial The man who didn’t know you could level up in Mass Effect The man who spent an hour jumping into a wall and walking into lava in doom eternal because he couldn’t figure out where to go He”s done it all
😂😂 this man's track record ...is just wow
How the hell does he still find work? Is the entire industry full of idiots like him?
Honestly, if he comes out saying he was trolling around some years later, I wouldn't be suprised because how can one be so stupid
If you want to know if the game is too hard for your grandma or dog or your grandma's dog, read the Takahashi review.
That guy bring a shame to japanese people.
I want to point out that there's footage of literal children beating the tutorial faster than this dude. The game is like : "Press Y to dash!" And this dude's just like : "What's dashing do?"
bro i literally saw the Y button to dash and i pressed it and then did the jump by accident because i was moving. it’s nearly possible to do the jump WITHOUT dashing, too
There's a video of a pigeon completing a task faster than this guy finished this tutorial lmao
If I can beat halo reach on heroic at 6 he can beat a tutorial at 30
He pressed Y to dash many times right away. He had no problem figuring that part out, it was like 3 seconds in. Reading the words that are there was not the issue.
@@gavinjenkins899 then explain literally the entire minute of him just standing in the corner pressing dash and jumping? He didn’t even stand on the block
I think I found the guy behind all the mobile game ads
It shouldn't be humanly possible to mess up this bad
Can this guy read
Was wondering the same thing. Like maybe he can’t read English. So all he sees is the buttons.
@@sandywolfr26 his review was written in english so he can certainly read.
Green Bandit then there really is no excuse for this sad display.
Green Bandit probably translated with google translater
No
You know this wouldn’t be so humiliating if it was the AI learning how to play. They probably would’ve done better than this game journalist anyways.
Yes well the AI has that I in its definition, the journo only has the A.
@@yaelz6043 No, it's still AI, but in this case, it means Artificial Idiot
@@wio1 HAHAHA.
@@wio1 I stand corrected.
@@wio1 Artificial Iridium
At last we found who played all those mobile game ads
This felt so much longer than 2 minutes 20 seconds
Throw this guy against DSP in Dark Souls 1v1, no backseaters. A battle for the ages.
Just throw him to minecraft in peaceful mode in a mini hole spawn
Accurate since Cuphead is the run and gun's of dark souls
Just put him against gundyr, he still won’t win
He couldn’t beat pinwheel
@@jaba4720 he couldn't hardly beat the tutorial, he wouldn't be able to beat any DS boss.
A journalist does not have to be perfect at games for his opinion to matter; everyone dies to the first goomba sooner or later. But this is like getting a game over to it.
Nah this is more like the equivalent of getting a game over in a game that doesn't even have a game over
we found the game journo
@@rhysjonsmusic read the comment again.
@@KhryausOHowl you sure? It looks more like losing to the loading screen to me
@@KhryausOHowl cuphead
This is still one of the funniest gaming videos
i want this guy to beat dark souls
I swear this is like watching an AI learn. Man, you've already tried jumping from the ground eight times, maybe it's time to jump from the block?
No, I am *ABSOLUTELY CONFIDENT* that an AI can do better than this
I think, when you're not that familiar with how video games in general work, you might intuitively think that the jumps may vary in hight, and that the vertical distance between the left block and the pillar cancels out the hight advantage it would give you.
This is like being a food critic who keeps stabbing his eyeballs with the fork
Look, youre the one who confused the absentminded oblivious food critic by feedin them fish eye soup; ofc theyll mix up what eyeballs theyre sposed to eat
It's like a being a food critic who keeps missing his mouth and gets food all over his lap.
That was fucking creepy and unnecessary but ok
@@pawbgles I'm very right and you were being weird
@@phantomwarrior8686 As someone who lives weird, OPs comment was not creepy, weird, or unnecessary. It was an apt metaphor.
It's like the music is making fun of him lol
I feel like im watching a struggling animal
This actually hurt me. Not because the simplest thing they can do is read the text behind the screen, but the fact that the devs tried so hard to make it beginner friendly, just to have someone like this fail. For someone who's job is to write up a story, they sure as hell don't know how to read.
The problem solving clearly isn't there either 😬
Some people are just born slow…
Do you think when they fought their first boss they rage quitted as soon as they took a hit ten seconds into the fight?
@@Keyfur91 no because they couldn't figure out how to reach the Quit option in the menu.
@@sam8404 They probably dont even know where the boss is on the map.
The only positive thing I can say about letting people who don’t know shit about video games test this shit for review is that you can understand what a brand new person in gaming is going to experience, that being said letting them review games without disclosing they’re bad at games or new to them is such a horrible thing to do because it just hurts the games rating
Thing is, he did, he said many times in his report that he sucked at cuphead and that thefootage was shameful
@@lovelyyolk9066 why are you in everyone's replies defending him XD you must be the journalist
@@lovelyyolk9066 it's one thing to suck at cuphead, and something else entirely to not comprehend the most basic of videogame language. Because that's what's happening here. He's unable to comprehend videogame language. The game is communicating to you what it wants from you with platforms and arrows and directions. Anyone that has ever played a game before will have at least a vague experience with this. This guy seems to have 0 of that.
@@lovelyyolk9066 he doesn't suck at Cuphead he seam to not have any game experience at all
This is what happens when companies hire based on a college degree than on experience. DSP is more reliable than most games journalists and that's sad. No wonder independent reviewers are thriving.
Whenever I feel like I’m bad at games I always come here to feel better about myself, and it always works.
the ragtime piano is the best, it's like mocking their stupidity
I love how at 0:56 after the air dash you can hear the gears in his head starting to turn.
Yeah, he is one of these people who are so slow you can actually hear the gears turning in their head as they make their next thought.
Imagine getting paid to play games and being that bad at them lol
@@wolfsell6684 I don't really think they're bad, just do it on purpose, this brings more views than a normal review / article, especially when you pair it with a hot topic (for the audience of these games) such as needing difficulty sliders, pretty much mass baiting elitists and other angry players into reading it just to bash it and thus increase their numbers, people making fun of them is just what they want
@@johjoh9270you’re probably right but I still don’t like ign because of they’re bias towards Sony
The moment before a brilliant revelation.
Whenever I feel stupid about dying 100+ times in this game, I watch this and I feel better
I didnt finish the second isle yet and I have 1100+ deaths
@@neodintchly My death counter hasn’t changed because when I get hit I restart. Fuck S Ranks
King Dice is the reason why I can't continue. I don't know why I struggle with him, but he's currently been undefeated for nearly three years now
@@REDFRLegend king dice is easy you can control your roll with decent enough timing and always land on the hp squares and safe squares
@@hhhhhh-vi6sq The hard part is getting to him. Either I die in a stupid way, my laptop starts lagging or I have to fight the monkey and I can't beat the monkey!
Games need to have a game journalist difficulty option
This dude literally plays like an AI in the opening stages
It’s like he’s playing blindfolded...
And his little brother is playing
And his controller is unplugged
You can blindfolded defeat every boss in the first isle
And he's playing with a USB steering wheel
The game was so easy he fell asleep while playing it
Given that this isn't even the first enemy and the game outright tells you what to do, this is like being stuck on the title screen of Super Mario Bros, staring at the words "Push Start" for several minutes and not knowing what to do.
There are worst examples, like being told to press ''any'' button to continue and the ''genius'' decides to press the power button and wonder why it didn't work.
@@reborno-o4498 LOL SO TRUE
@@reborno-o4498 I know that someone, somewhere has had this exact thing happen to them.
@@reborno-o4498 but at least they do it for the memes most of the time
Five seconds in and I suddenly understand how every college math tutor feels
One must imagine Dean Takahashi happy. Il Faut Imaginer Dean Takeahashi Heureux.
Me: Man the first boss is hard! This guy: HoLd My BeAr
hold my bear
@@SJC82 I'll hold it alright
A whole ass bear
Scold my beer
I would say to any one that says that meme is an idiot
Being a full percenter and speedrunner of Cuphead, this not just shocked me but made me feel pain the more I watched.
I don't even play Cuphead and this made me feel physical pain. These pillocks shouldn't be allowed near any platformers, much less any of my favorite games, like Rain World. If a game journalist is talking about Rain World, no he isn't
@@JetFalcon710 based rain world enjoyer
@@obeeked1385 Yeah, it's pretty fun after you've accepted that death is inevitable
Post your cuphead speedrun pls
@@Hulijingjinx I don't have i on computer, I would speedrun on switch so sadly I can't. sorry
When Im feeling down I come back to this video. To remind myself, I cant ever possibly be this bad.
Games journalists never had their asses kicked by brutally hard early gen console games and it shows.
This is like one of the overly long jokes in family guy. The one's that start out funny, but as they go on get kinda annoying, then become funny again!
"This is like that time I tried playing cuphead!"
“Hey Lois, remember that time I went to the white room with that ‘Cup Head’ guy?”
"then become funny again!" Family Guy??
Tried giving this part to a friend who very rarely play games and they managed it on second attempt. This dude is a professional videogame reviewer 🤣
"professional"
If they can't even beat a simple 2 button press jump for more than 20 seconds I don't think they can review the game cuz fucking their so fucking shit at the game, a toddler can do better than this shitty reviewers. Really makes my blood boil considering the fact that reviews like this can't even make past the tutorial only to review it saying it's "hard",fucking GET GOOD then, you are a GAME JOURNALIST your job is to be good at games before you criticize it!
And then after that, he gives his "professional" opinion
This guy has the critical thinking skills of a wasp
It's always crazy to me how as a dedicated learner/gamer, I want to read everything I possibly can to learn what does what, but most people brand new to a game seem to be against something as simple as reading a tutorial. Let alone while being in a noobie position where they *need* that help the most.
Most toddler gamers now adays need handholding. Like they can barely read anyway. I remember when games didnt tell you shit, you had to learn by yourself. Trial by fire
@@magnesjberg24 if anything I kinda liked that even when I was a kid (been playing since a young age). It made me proud when I was able to play harder "big kid" games. But I will also admit, it's important for there to be easy games out there to bridge the gap between beginner gamers and more dedicated ones.
@@NotJarrod thats what we call the feeling of acomplishment, to overcome your struggles and suceed. to improve yourself and your knowledge/experince. this goes for everything in life. not just games. litterly, git gud
@@NotJarrod i agree that games doesnt need to be hard to be fun. there are plenty of silly relaxing games out there that give great enjoyment. but the most logical solution to people whining about a game being too hard or too easy is a difficulty setting, where you're free to choose however you want to play.
We joke about how game journalists want the games to hold their hands the whole way through, but clearly that’s not enough. The Cuphead tutorial literally spells out everything it wants from you. These idiots just want the game to play itself.
They should convert to reviewing movies instead
@@minersheep8285 Nah, his taste in movies is probably shit 💀
@@minersheep8285 “this movie was too complicated for me. Couldn’t get past the opening sequence”
Sonic forces game of the year
It's not even being bad at gaming at this point. They're just dense.
When the journalists play so much FPS games they forget how to play platformers:
This same man played doom eternal, He barely got to the shooting, He still has trouble with platforming.
Even ppl who play FPS games know how to do that 😂
Exactly what I was going to say
You should see the same guy's doom eternal game play.
This same journalist also uploaded gameplay of doom eternal and it was the most painful thing I’ve ever sat through
The old timey music is just a cherry on top, truly makes this more comedic than it should be
I swear my blood pressure rises a little more every second I watch it
As a kid when I first started playing platformer games like mega man z I always had a lingering doubt in the back of my mind regarding how far I'd be able to with a jump followed by an air dash/series of wall jumps or if I'd be able to make it to a certain platform without falling to my death so I tended to miss out on certain items and consulted guides to be extra sure it was safe to jump This on the other hand is ...something else entirely
Ok but the MMZ games slapped and the dash, dash jump, wall jumps, dash wall jumps all felt so fucking good tho. Smoothest GBA controls of all time.
@@FJ_Beaujangles I agree, it's just that this was my general situation for any platformer game with dash and jump mechanics on any console where my main worry was just timing the inputs right and now looking back this was actually more of a problem with me for the mega man x and metroid (for shinespark parts) games and it didn't help either that I only played them on phone emulators so adjusting to the controls took time
@@indranilroy4822 Understandable. If you still emulate on your phone some people don't know you can pair an xbox one and I think even switch pro controller with Bluetooth. If you have one lying around it helps a lot
@@indranilroy4822 ps4 controllers can also bluetooth to phones
I mean, that's completely fair. I didn't really have access to the internet back when I first played MMZ3 (my first Zero game) and that GBA screen is really small. Some of the jumps you're expected to make with that screen space are a bit much
I wanna hear his review, or at least what he said about it. I bet it sounded something like “Although they did promise this game would be really hard, I wasn’t expecting how far they’d go with this. For a tutorial, they made it tough as nails to pass. I bet it was harder than the hardest dark souls dark souls boss. A tutorial is meant to get you into game but for Cuphead, not even the smartest person could get past this. I had to keep trying and trying and trying to get it right until I got past it. The only reason I got past because I just was really lucky. So far, Cuphead is a 1 out of 10, as in they don’t have good difficulty balance, and didn’t care about fairness and only cared about if the game was impossible.”
That sounds like a ign review
He actually said that he enjoyed his time with it, and admitted that this gameplay of him failing the tutorial is quite shameful.
His actual review was like "I don't play games very often, but the company I work for wants me to publish gameplay of Cuphead because a lot of people are excited for the game, so here are my embarrassing 10 minutes of Cuphead.
@@Fi___ an actual respectable journalist being honest? Where did more like him go?
The state of videogame journalism.
The sad thing is that this journalist did a good review and said he didn't know how to play these games, he owned his mistakes and didn't blame the game but the internet still keeps humiliating the guy and using him to shit on other game journalists.
By every second i watched this video, it felt as if my face was slowly painting itself with clown makeup.
I know a few gaming journos around Quebec City and Montreal. The main issue the profession has is that you don't really start as a gamer; you start your journalism career as a writer. Then you land yourself a few reporting gigs, someone from the Tech section notices you sophomorically futzing around with a handheld, and figures "'Hey, that guy looks like a gamer! I'll ask him about writing a games review column every X days!" So you end up with a guy who has bigger headlines to cover (mergers and acquisitions, prototypes, breakthroughs in consumer tech, etc) who *maybe* has a few hours a month to begrudgingly put on a game he might not even be interested in. This is the end result. Dean Takahashi cannot pass Cuphead's tutorial level because he has no professional incentive to do so. He doesn't need to be informative; he just needs to produce a take that can be integrated in his site's publishing queue on time. He doesn't need to be good at the game - and doesn't even need to *care*. Of course, the opposite end is GameSpot, where you sort of get the sense that there's some work that's been actually done, but that it's all swallowed by the need to give the tentpole releases the exact kinds of big scores that'll keep the site afloat in sponsorships. In-between, you've got a lot of KZheadrs and smaller vloggers - and this is where I'd say you find honest, workable and valuable games criticism.
Around Quebec AND Montreal? I'm hoping you mean Quebec City cuz bruh Montreal is in Quebec 💀
@@stuffwithsoph8264 Yes, I did mean Quebec City. I apologize if it wasn't clear enough, I'm an ESL speaker and had a brain fart. Just called Quebec City "Quebec" seeing as that's what we do in French.
@@McSquiddington Had no clue Quebecois only say Quebec when referencing the city, neat.
@@stuffwithsoph8264 The more you know, right?
Holy shit, precisely this. Don’t get me wrong, the gameplay here can still be questionable, but i think so many people who grew up playing games massively overestimate just how much subconscious habits and lessons get engrained into by playing games as a kid. Recently tried to get some friends who really never play video games at all into some that I thought they’d enjoy, and whilst I made a conscious effort to be as explanatory as possible, often the parts that confused them most, or had them stumble the most, were aspects I hadn’t even thought about. Things like combining actions like moving and jumping, or even where certain settings where in menus. They aren’t stupid, they just haven’t had these experiences drilled into them at a young age, and I think a lot of people in these comments completely forget that.
- This dude dashed his head into the wall MULTIPLE times assuming that it would eventually work - If he had used more than 2 of his braincells he could get over the wall in three seconds - There is a goddamn arrow pointing to where you should dash to get to the platform - This dude has to be on all the drugs at once to not put the pieces together - I’ve failed this jump before. Just once tho shhhh - The music stopped comedically at the same time he got over the wall - I still think about this clip every time I think I’m bad at video games. It’s been four years - I’m surprised he finished the parry section in a shorter amount of time - I fear for the day he escapes the tutorial only to die at the first boss
My grandfather who lives in the province, who's only used a fliphone and a TV, after a simple explanation of the controls beat not only the tutorial but AN ACTUAL BOSS
U need to wise up
bro would miss with the chaser
This will be a timeless reminder that I'll NEVER stop laughing about.
When you can't beat the tutorial before the background music loops, you know it's basically already over.
this is the same man who jumped around in circles in Doom Eternal and didnt know you could level up in Mass Effect 💀 I am flabbergasted as to how this man still has his job after 21 YEARS
I'm surprised HES IN HIS FUCKING 30s
@@MarcoAdventures he's been a gaming journalist since his MID TEENS?
@@MarcoAdventures Wait, this man isn’t a boomer? I would expect this level of ineptitude from a much older person, not from what is supposed to be a fairly young millennial.
@@peggedyourdad9560 There's these old ladies on the internet streaming themselves playing games like Skyrim. Age has nothing to do with it. This just really seems like someone who has zero interest in games and refuses to research their job but will still do the work.
@@mnArqal93 I know, I just meant that it's more common and acceptable for older individuals to have a tough time getting the hang of video games. Not, that it would be impossible for an old person to play them.
I’m a super idiot with memory troubles and I was pretty happy with getting through the tutorial smoothly. I can definitely tell you that his brain is not comprehending the words or objects here.
The music fits so well. Especially when he finally makes it over the dash