The President, cooped up "working hard" at the White House all weekend, missed all the fun in the streets.
Subscribe To "The Late Show" Channel HERE: bit.ly/ColbertKZhead
For more content from "The Late Show with Stephen Colbert", click HERE: bit.ly/1AKISnR
Watch full episodes of "The Late Show" HERE: bit.ly/1Puei40
Like "The Late Show" on Facebook HERE: on.fb.me/1df139Y
Follow "The Late Show" on Twitter HERE: bit.ly/1dMzZzG
Follow "The Late Show" on Google+ HERE: bit.ly/1JlGgzw
Follow "The Late Show" on Instagram HERE: bit.ly/29wfREj
Follow "The Late Show" on Tumblr HERE: bit.ly/29DVvtR
Watch The Late Show with Stephen Colbert weeknights at 11:35 PM ET/10:35 PM CT. Only on CBS.
Get the CBS app for iPhone & iPad! Click HERE: bit.ly/12rLxge
Get new episodes of shows you love across devices the next day, stream live TV, and watch full seasons of CBS fan favorites anytime, anywhere with CBS All Access. Try it free! bit.ly/1OQA29B
---
The Late Show with Stephen Colbert is the premier late night talk show on CBS, airing at 11:35pm EST, streaming online via CBS All Access, and delivered to the International Space Station on a USB drive taped to a weather balloon. Every night, viewers can expect: Comedy, humor, funny moments, witty interviews, celebrities, famous people, movie stars, bits, humorous celebrities doing bits, funny celebs, big group photos of every star from Hollywood, even the reclusive ones, plus also jokes.
Even across the border, we love your show, Stephen. Greetings from Mexico!
Thank you for not paying for a stupid wall!
Romy Macias We expats in Ajijic, Mexico love Colbert as well!
Romy - hi from Canada. We must encourage our leaders to stand strong against the bully in the White House. Yay Mexico.
Love him across the northern border as well. Greetings from Canada, eh!
I'm jealous of all you guys not in the U.S. right now. :'(
That town in Nova Scotia, where 31 people and a baby marched, has a population of 65 people, and they doubled their protest from last year! The globe is protesting this presidency.
It's true! My friend's Mom was in that group. It was a huge deal, and they have had regular meetings since last year's march to keep the momentum going. :)
Ya but to be fair they were all offered a free beer at the end of the march. Newfies will do anything if there is free beer. The other half were too hungover to make it.
Ya, how would anyone from another country know anything about equal rights for women?
Blue Skies - I saw that march. Bravo Nova Scotia. Imagine how awful it would be to know throughout the world, the majority of people, want nothing but to see you gone gone gone....even though we hear he is protected from criticism...the knowledge he is so despised, must get through. If he had one ounce of decency, I might have one ounce of compassion for the isolation he must feel...but he doesn't and I don't.
dyodoublej -- It might be nice if American women had the right not to be shot by an angry ex with a bruised ego and control issues. But Republicans would load the gun and hand him a spare magazine for it too. It would be nice if they had the right to affordable, accessible birth control and health care and contraceptives. But when "pro-life" politicians force Planned Parenthood to close, let employers choose health plans that exclude contraception, and let pharmacists refuse to fill prescription, that puts an additional burden on women. Meanwhile Viagra remains a sacred right for men. Oh, and women would like to retain the right to be persons under the law instead of mobile self-sustaining incubators.
"I'm also 6'3" 239 pounds" Hahahaha. I'm 6'2" 215 pounds. And their is no way that rump weighs 239... or 6'3".
I'm only 5'10" and the scale told me I was 240 this morning. I'm a little fat, but I don't look as fat as the dotard. No way in hell he's 239.
+Tommy Cease He's probably 6'1" and weighs between 260-280 pounds...from my observation
I'm 6' and 290 pounds, and I look in much better shape than Drumpf!
I too survived last year with the help of Stephen Colbert, John Oliver, Samantha Bee, Seth Meyers, Trevor Noah and Jordan Klepper.
Jim Bean, Johnny Walker.... They helped me as well.
Nah, I doubt his eyesight is that good.
Siddhant Pandey and occasionally Jon Stewart : )
That’s fucking tragic mate.
I survived last 3years with those people and Kate McKinnon. And I'm not even an American...
imagine walking into a public restaurant and yelling about how great it is these strangers are eating in your honor. that’s trump
No, that is Eric Cartman.
ehaitem Basically the same thing.
Eric Cartman's voice is not quite that grating.
He probably would say something to the effect that he made it possible for them to eat at a restaurant and that the restaurant is in business and has employees and that the street it's on is busy....that the sun is shining....
Greedy Bat Imagine thousands of women (and several confused men) taking to the streets claiming to be fighting for the same rights they've had for decades.
"Even I know what NO means./These have been the worst 7 years of my life." -A poster held by a golden retriever at the Knoxville, TN march
James Burgess Dang! 😄
Funny.....
Nice one !
Agreed, SirBlot.
Damn, you got me. Had to think about it for a second.
Stephen is a great storyteller. And all those signs were wonderful.
one of my fav signs that Stephen didn't show was grab em by the midterms :D
Does this guy (picture of trump) make my country look small? [one of my favorites, just can't remember where I saw it...]
My signs said “They tried to bury us, not knowing we were seeds.” And “Girls with dreams become women with vision.” Also I like the version of that sign that said “Does this ASS make my country look small?”
Release the MEMO
yashiWinchester i
You got it random person holding up a sign. Us norwegians will scramble our longboats and come to your aid!
Spike Spiegel Don't forget to loot the UK and Ireland along the way, you know, for old times' sake.
Bring it on, we're ready for ya this time! ;)
LordKellthe1st They were especially brilliant in 1672.
Better idea would be to join forces this time. We can show you how to burn the White House to the ground again.
As an Englishman - we remember the last time you boys scrambled your long boats....**sips tea suspiciously**
The signs are legendary
I survived this past year by also watching Stephen Colbert!
The old lady with the last sign, the best ! So true! Colbert the best news source and best way to survive this all!
Trump: Get out there now to celebrate the historic milestones and unprec- Narcissus: whoa dial it back buddy not everything is about you
TheCstar07, this is BRILLIANT!!!!!!!!!!
TheCstar - I would love for trump to come to my neighborhood to "celebrate' his milestones. Please come trump....we'll wait for you....don't bother with your body guards.....we'd love to look after you....
When you have to be tempered by the god of narcissism, you know you might be going too far.
TheCstar07 Stephen's ego makes Trump look like a Pope Francis.
Release the MEMO
Missed a sign: "Grab 'em by the POLLS!"
That’s exactly how I got through the year! I watch the late show every night
You know the best way to get through this year? Make sure you, everyone you know and everyone that they know, goes out and votes.
Madison Siedschlag you and me both! Every late night show.
dyodoublej Umm this is a comedy show. Are you lost? Not Colbert’s fault that Trump makes a good target for jokes ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Hello from Nova Scotia! We're proud with our turnout lol
Also great chants! "We need a leader, not a creepy tweeter!"😁
I was watching the New York March, and I could have sworn I saw Ivanka holding up a sign that proclaimed "Hands Off" with a "Daddy!" written much smaller underneath.
TheReal008Zulu 😁
They need to do more of Colbert and Batiste just hanging out. Their chemistry is actually decent when they're talking to each other, but we see it so rarely.
It's because John rarely has anything interesting to say.
Waypoint - "we see it so rarely"? That's interesting. It is obvious to me, has always been...clearly they enjoy and 'play off' of one another.
I think what he's saying is he'd like to see more times where Stephen and Jon are just chatting with each other for extended periods of time like in the video. What we mostly get are short quips or musings that are part of the script.
No, they need to cut Baptiste's mic during the monologue, so we don't see him mimicking everything Colbert says, like a dumb gangsta rapper....
my sentiment exactly letterman and shaffer had that down
Love that the first half of this is just Stephen and John chatting. It felt like those fantastic clips of Colbert answering questions before the show and just jumping into some random story. It's awesome. More of that, please!
I really loved that unscripted convo with Jon in the beginning, really genuine and fun! More of that please!!
Batiste's delivery on "Tom Brady got it" at 2:16 was woefully unappreciated. For a guy that usually doesn't contribute much in the way of humor, that was funny as fuck!
Dean Martin as fuck? How imaginative!
You must be fun at parties.
She must be fun as fuck!
shut the fuck up
Stephen forgot to mention Sandy Cove, Nova Scotia has a population of only 65 people, and 31+1 baby showed up !!
That is how we all have overcome this last year! Thank you Steve Colbert,
"Norway please help us" xD It's your revolution america, make it happen.
I see a blue tsunami in 2018 and 2020! Can't wait.
dyodoublej TROLL
dyodoublej no your revolution was the civil war and you Confederate bitches got your asses handed to you in a high hat.
+Tammy Hibner I'm waiting for a tsunami that washes away both red and blue.
It really did help me get through the year!
Apparently that was half the population of that town in Novia Scotia.
So, like, _all_ the women in the town?
About half the families, actually. Men and women. Could be the rest were either at work or not up to a hike with the walker.
Yes, typo with "Novia"! I did say it was a town *in* Nova Scotia, mainly because I couldn't remember the name from the video.
Millions of women are on streets celebrating my anniversary, what can I say folks, chicks just dig me! Must be my gorgeous hair and tremendous hands! -- Dotard
According to KZhead the most exciting thing to happen during 'Superbowl' is advertising.
I'm amazed he didn't mention Trump's misspeak where he said he was opposed to live births 9 months after conception and about the silly shit he said shortly after that. It's one of the most hilariously confusing things i've ever heard from a public speaker and our president said it...
Two terms in prison that is...
Source? I want to see that😁
Ebony - What's the weather like in Moscow today ?
Ny'kratmuhn Me'ru I can't help but feel like the only reason people say things like that is to piggyback off the "Hillary for Prison" thing. Only it doesn't make sense when applied to Trump because Hillary is actually a war criminal.
President Waldo I'm amazed in the sense that idiots like Colbert never skip a chance to make the same lazy, unfunny jokes whenever Trump opens his mouth.
I like story time with Stephen and John
"Dear marcher, we would gladly draw up a short schematic for a functional, humane health care system, as well as a drawing depicting a democracy with more than two parties, so that you can show it to the next president, once the buffoon has left the building. However, we need to stop the racist wave that is running through our own country as well, so we can't promise any long term work on fixing your mess. Good luck though, we're rooting for you! Make America liveable again!" - Norway
To the Exuberant and amazing neighbores of Norway---cans I just move in? this dude is nufking futz! Or maybie you can just get rid of him the OG Wayy and loot and pilage the lands. I'm cool with that to. Just make sure to take that orange alien with you.
We didn't think that before trump, so it's his fault we are like that now.
dyodoublej Seeing your comment I had to laugh so hard I think I didn’t stop for five minutes 😂😂 Best troll or stupidest person 😂👌🏻
dyodoublej . “Brainwashed...bla bla ..brainwashing....bla bla... brainwashed....bla bla”. Somebody did a job on you, didn’t they?
Wish we could do that with Nazis in the US.
I went to the one is Seattle. It was amazing.
Wow what a great turnout, thank you to all the viewers who came here just to see my comment. You're welcome!
Jerricola Wow! I am truly humbled that all 13,000 people came here just to read my response to this comment. Amazing!
+Boobalopbop Ya'll stop. lol
lol
😂😂
Thank you Jerricola for having me here to post today. Things are looking pretty good in the Wasteland so far this year but boy has it been cold!
Alright, politics aside for a moment...I played football my freshman year in HS. The result was 2 rather funny sayings uttered by my coach. The first one was after a kid known as "the monster" tried to get passed me (I was the outside linebacker as it was known then) He knocked me on my a** but caught his foot in my face-guard and nearly tore my head off as he fell to the ground. The coach came over, said "Nice tackle" and walked away. Another time, during windsprints he told me "You run too long in the same place." Although not extremely useful in my life, I will, nevertheless, remember them until my dying day. (Lord willing)
I like the football story, cute and nice to hear little normal stories in the middle of current events
The one thing I still can't find anywhere is an estimate of the total combined crowd size of all the protests nationwide ... I want to see if the record was broken. Just how many millions in all, that's how much the nation wants Trump gone.
The record set by the anti-Iraq war protest in 2003, which was broadly ignored by the media and may now be permanently overshadowed. *sigh*
Stephen Colbert is such a nerd, and I love it.
taking credit for the march because of course he did
Would the march have happened without him? I don't think so.
Hmmm, so the revolution is on!! Like the other guy said get out and vote mid election. lets show this asshole that most sane compassionate and intelligent citizens know what how insane this presidency is. and soon to be WAS!
BladeWinters technically it was... haha. Against him!
rocky It's actually not that insane at all if you examine it logically and pay attention to what he's actually doing. I can understand you feeling that way if all you do is watch left-wing news outlets and comedians constantly bash Trump and completely lose their shit every time he says a word you/they don't like.
Badly Drawn Turtle it'd happened for a lot of years before king combover took power, and it'll keep going once drumpf the tiny handed is doing time.
That bit at the beginning with Steven Colbert and Jon Batiste was hilarious. You guys should do that more often :D
I’m here for the first half of this video. Love Colbert’s comedy about life and all his stories
No one can inspire women more than I do, that I can tell you, I am like a very stable genius, believe me! - Trump
Ebony Hi trollbitch! Is 2020 the amount of rubles you get paid to be obviously PATHETIC?
Only 200K in NYC? Weak, NY.
yes, yes! thank you colbert! because I, too, have only survived this past year by watching you and Meyers and Noah!
The Nova Scotia town that doubled their participation has a population of only 60 something so having 31 plus a baby is amazing.
Shout out to all those 👩 women who marched. 💘 SC John Baptiste still jammin 🎶.
Kathy Bryant What were they marching for again?
As Jon would say "YEAH"
"Hood Awareness".... HA!
C.S. Bailey IK,R? 😁😂😁😂
Love the kid sign: "I'm 6'3" and weight 239 lbs.".
The signs were hilarious & it was amazing looking forward to the next one!
"Stable genius" Donald Trump think those women are celebrating his anniversary, talk about delusional, hahaha!
Stop willfully misinterpreting him. When he said he was a stable genius, he only meant he can build a damn fine barn for horses. And nothing else. Literally nothing else. That's the only thing he can do.
He knew that were marching against him and this administration he's being sarcastic.
00 0 They should be, employed women have drastically increased in the last year.
AllCommiesCanEatShit andDie That's due to Obama not trump. Most of America knows this that's why we give jackshit for trump.
Trump (in jail by) 2020!!!
Let's just make this simple. Stephen we LOVE you! Trump we HATE you! Simple enough.
grobannoel let's make this more simple Stephen is just a comedian and host and Trump is and will be president for a while no matter how everyone hates him that guy still got the power to run the country just hope he doesn't start hating people because he can really fuck people's life while people can only hate him.
dyodoublej what I'm trying to say is that Trump is president and majority of people elected him and he's still going to be president for a while so instead of making fun of him and cursing him i think criticise him the right way and in a logical sense but let me tell you you can't deny that economy is better under Trump administration no matter what he says on twitter and speeches so i think people should use some logic and shut the fuck up because he ain't getting impeached that's for sure not until there's a hard evidence of some crime that he did.
dyodoublej , you should know propaganda when you see it. I'm sure you watch faux news all day and read Bitebart when you're on the john.
dyodoublej Wow! You use the word "propaganda" a lot! You clearly don't have any idea what's going on, do u, moron?
The majority of people did not elect Trump. The majority voted for Hillary R Clinton, but Trump won because the electoral college voted for him.
I love that Stephen dresses so smartly. It sets a standard and tone for the show.
We are all glad there’s Stephen Colbert.
Thank you Sandy Cove, Nova Scotia !!! That is an impressive turnout !!! Resist !
Yay, Nova Scotia representin ❤️😊
I love NS, it's such a beautiful province.
Nova Scotia, and the Maritime provinces in general, are high on my bucket list. Greetings from the prairies!
Definitely vacation there if you have a chance since it's absolutely beautiful. I'm from Ontario and my family spent many summers there.
Ash Bonin Representing their idiocy...
Stephen Colbert is my spirit animal with that football story
These signs are awesome! Love it
Great ending Stephen!
I’ve got through it via this and Sassy Trump, UK TV seems to have got bored with political satire, I’m guessing because Twitter kinda has that covered, now.
Trump invented the best fake news with the inauguration crowd size. 😂
That big shout out to Nova Scotia! Probably the only time that NS will be mentioned in US National News (even a Late Show) in my life time. Considering Sandy Cove only has 65 permanent residents, pretty good! Love from the best Late Show host, Stephen Colbert! My day is made :D
I kinda admire Trump's ability to spin negative criticism into positive affirmative. Lol. I'll start congratulating myself for all the haters in my life.
And trump as usual just sprinkles a little of his magic wishful thinking over the event, and............ - Abracadabra! : the whole thing is now a Celebration In Honor Of trump .
NOT!
camelshit Typical dictator logic.
I’m pretty sure there was literally a joke like this last year. Trump truly does things more ridiculous than comedians can write.
Benzine270 Or rather, people are just too stupid to realize Trump is trolling them.
Release the MEMO
I too survived watching your show. It allowed me to laugh...made me feel better. TY!!
GOD bless this hero Stephen Colbert
Luv your work - greetings from a streetperformer in Austria
the first part is what this show needs more... engage the musician guy more often
Hey, at least he stopped saying that cringe-worthy *_cold blooooded!_* catchphrase. That...got...very...annoying.
I love the casual side talk he did with Jon Batist
Loved the banter at the beginning
I think John Batiste took one of those active listening classes. "Uh-huh... Oh my goodness! ... Yes, yes.... wow, yeah"
Trump would have been classier to acknowledge the marches as an expression of freedom of speech, but by this time I think everyone here and in the world knows that it would be a very cold day in hell before Trump regards it as that and stops there.
The modern liberal wouldn't dare portray the Woman's March as freedom of speech after they've spent the last year trashing the concept. Don't want to give the idea any legitimacy, or the people they don't like could start claiming they have the basic right to speak their mind; the horror!
Loves the banter.
I'm not even American but I survived thanks to you~~ 😂 😂 !!
Yes go women
? What are they fighting for again?
Trump. Naive or narcissist. You decide.
I say both.
I would go with narcissistic and delusional.
Dictator. Slowly taking over and simultaneously destroying the once functioning government, encouraging hate of the "other," and deporting people for being different (brown).
False dichotomy.
Dr. Mantis Toboggan, M.D. Definitely textbook narcissist, with sociopathic tendencies and multiple learning disabilities.
I want more story time with Colbert!
Jon Batiste is so awesome. Smooth, cool, and laid back guy.
Is American football that thing where they run around for a few seconds then have a ad break and repeat for hours
They only have ad breaks when someone gets a concussion
I think that it is that weird rugby version with full body armour that rarely involves a foot actually touching a ball. But I am European, so what do I know.
sadly he has also been accused of rape. such a hypocrite
and his ex-wife under sworn testimony. not to mention the 20 or so others
Holy shit my heart nearly stopped I thought you were talking about Colbert
dyodoublej Lol. Feel free to accuse, but you'd be putting yourself at risk. One woman who accused the paedophile Roy Moore had her home burned. Wanna take that risk? Because that's what women who open up about rape go through daily.
I mean I'm not willing to brush aside these accusations about him, but just what exactly stops anyone who hates trump a whole lot from accusing him of rape? And how can you tell, unless we stick to our american ideas and see him as innocent until proven guilty, then we can see the picture more clearly, and have more rational arguments against him.
Nachtel Great. Another poor soul believing the fairy tale "innocent until proven guilty". Let's just say if that really was the case then Black Lives Matter wouldn't happen in the first place. But fine. That aside, why do you think rape cases don't have this idea apply to them at all? Because "innocent until proven guilty" goes both ways. It's not just the accused who will face consequences, it's also the victims. Lying to the police is also a crime, let alone everything victims have to go through should they ever decide to come forward with their case. There is a reason why some victims wait a long time to come forward, because as much as the experience is horrific the last thing they want is to continue thinking about it at all. Remember Roy Moore, btw? One of his victims lost her home to arson. To recap: "innocent until proven guilty" is a concept reserved for detective shows, victims go through hell as well when they come forward (as if the rape wasn't enough) and the public could carry their our brand of justice if they liked the rapist enough. As for Trump, I say listen to the victim's account and really think about whether Trump is disgusting enough to engage in paedophilia.
loved the highschool football story. loved the signs. loved this whole thing
That coach impression though.
Trump the CLOWN is going down!
After 2024 yeah
I love republicans political discourse = "Fake news!." Wonderful :)
Love this show 0h and I wouldn't have made it with out this late show Steven is one of my favorite things to watch at night so much I really wish he would be on longer! Thanks for all the laugh's you bring us!
How cool that Digby, Nova Scotia was mentioned by Stephen! That's about 45 minutes from where I live and trust me, we know what's going on in the world and we march too! Woooohooooo!!!
Trump should really stop trying to spin everything his way. He looks even more delusional than usual.
Wow, if Donald was just a comedian, that tweet would've been kind of funny, but damn! What the actual fuck.
OMG I can relate to this story for cheerleading tryouts...total one day thing for me like I did not know I was expected to learn so many moves in such a little time and be the top of a pharmed . I was like Nope! See you guys in cross country I'll find my own way to stay in shape in the winter lol
Stephen Colbert is the best part of the last year.Keep it up! Put pressure on the orange guy and get him the H out of your White House. America deserves better.Cheers from Canada
Any other proud Nova Scotian's in the comments?
Does it count if I'm a proud Ontarian?
You're now an honorary member. Your plaque should arrive via moose express within the next snowfall.
What? Not by dogsled?
My Huskies are in some trouble after a run in with a Saint Bernard. After a brandy fueled game of poker, they mushed back home but unfortunately were stopped and are now on the lam. Ol' Scratch even made the "Bad Dog" most wanted list after some salacious leg activity with a neighbor.
Haligonian Right Here! :)
Bernie for president!
Klara Stern No
Some of those people should be getting awards for those signs.
I love the personal anecdote.
I could picture John's brain as he tried to maintain a conversation, and he was thinking "white guy in football, white guy in football", and that resulted in him completely randomly saying "Tom Brady" :-)
Arab
The last time I was convinced that 'Everything here is for me!' I was under anesthesia, awaiting surgery. Good to see the Prez getting the good juice...
that football story was hilarious
I survived watching Steven Colbert
Roseburg Oregon, a very red town, had 200 people show up to march!
"I played sports in school...I remember that...day." - Mitch Hedberg
We all survives thx Stephen Colbert. Lmao