6 Secrets I Learned Working For Rich People
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In this episode, Chelsea shows us all the secrets she learned while working for rich people, from a yacht club on the East Coast to nannying for families in France.
This video is brought to you by Haven Life Insurance Agency. Get your free quote for life insurance here: bit.ly/2xVNAUY
Articles cited on rich people & empathy: qz.com/816188/science-shows-t...
www.scientificamerican.com/ar...
www.wired.com/story/why-are-r...
The myth of female breadwinners having it all: hbr.org/2002/04/executive-wom...
Why do rich people work so much? www.nytimes.com/2019/10/17/st...
Generosity statistics by class: www.philanthropy.com/article/...
www.marketwatch.com/story/5-w...
Watch more of The Financial Diet hosted by Chelsea Fagan here: • THE FINANCIAL DIET
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It's just a fact that rich people typically lead very different lives than everyone else. Here's a video that outlines 8 financial realities that are making Americans' lives so difficult: kzhead.info/sun/fs-FepV8Z6l9n6c/bejne.html.
How do we build this kind of community? I want that so bad.
Hi! I was wondering if TFD has ever considered making a video on spending, saving, organization, or "adulting" but altered for those of us with ADHD? I find that a lot of ADHD advice is geared for children or towards specific adults who have more severe debt or financial issues than I do. My situation probably looks the same as most of the 20-something early career types most of your videos are catered to, but I find myself trying to take the advice in a way altered for my non-neurotypical brain. It would be nice to see if there is anything specific for us in the adult Adderall club, especially for those of us who are 'passing' outwardly. =D
When you are showing your studies I have noticed that you find a study and bend it to what you want it to say. People perceiving a person who looks at them less to be rich doesn’t mean rich people don’t care about (or even bother to look at) people. What if they are busy trying to juggle their busy Lives? Or what if a million other reasons? I would not say anything but I have seen you do it a few times and it drives me mad.
@@Dotmeblack Thanks for the suggestion! I'll definitely pass this on to the team, but for now, here is a good article from our site: thefinancialdiet.com/7-ways-keep-check-manage-life-adhd/. - Saidah, TFD
Bullshit and misleading
A former CEO of my company was the kindest boss I've had yet. He treated everyone from the janitor to the Chancellor with the same high respect. I was only a receptionist, but even 10 years after he retired, he still remembered me when he saw me on the street once, shook my hand and asked how I was doing. I wish every CEO were like that.
That's commendable
I worked with CEO’s like this. They’ve got my respect for ever.
@@Areli_Precious 👍
I think the fact that you described yourself as the lowly receptionist is kinda the point of the video. your job title shouldn't dictate your value as a human being. If you worked at his company for 10 years then he should know you. If a janitor saw you for 10 years and still didn't remember your name and face you'd think "what the hell" why is the CEO any different?
@@jasminecat2234 Excellent point. "Lowly" was a poor choice of words on my part and not a statement about the corporate atmosphere of my company. Still, he's the nicest and most respectful CEO I've ever worked with, and I want to honour him because that is an exceptional attitude among some of the wealthy, even though it should be normal for everyone.
“Never look at your neighbors plate unless it’s to see if they have enough” 👌🏼
love this. I am using this.
She sounds slightly bitter to me and highly judgmental?
If everyone else around me doesn't have enough, you bet I'll be looking at the rich persons plate
i like this quote, thank you
quote from Louis C.K.
My grandmother used to say - if you ever need help - don't ask a rich person.
Ask a poor person, they are kinder and if they can, they will.
True
Rich people always say that it is the government’s job to help the poor.
This is purely false. Most rich people would be fully ok to help if you are worth their time and see that their help is well received and appreciated. Just ask and see for yourself. Just don’t waste their time.
I think a lot of ppl go to ppl with money for help. If I was wealthy I wouldn’t help EVERYONE. I would help those who are trying to help themselves.
I worked at a country club very similar to your experiences. I was often treated well, but sometimes treated like a worthless idiot. They didn’t realize my family are also members of the country club...taking off my uniform and sitting with them for dinner at the club and watching their horrified faces after seeing my family was priceless. Oh those “Pretty Woman” film moments....
I do wonder how many of those that treated you well already knew your family went there, had been told by someone else or noticed clothes, shoes, jewellery, hair styles etc that denoted your high status.
@@juliancook3088 I agree, if they are smart they notice. Doesn't have to be material but behavior, confidence, accent etc.
@@frida507 How many rich people actually look at the people waiting on them, though?
@@wvu05 I'm not rich so I wouldn't know :D, bur some of them probably don't pay that much attention...
@@frida507 Even seeing upper-middle class people, I've noticed that it seems like the more money people have, the less likely they are to look at "the help." They are also much more likely to berate staff. Not always (there are some who just care about being above someone else of all economic levels), but some really do embody that time when Mitt Romney said "I like being able to fire people who provide a service."
"stop idolizing the rich and start seeing them for what they are" thank you.
Stop romanticizing the poor.
@@lob1523 Spot on
@@lob1523 lmaooo
@@lob1523 Agree! Even avatar the last airbender is guilty of that. There is not some nobility in being poor... it is injustice in action
@Victoria Akoms people who often make decisions based on greed and greed alone? Or just.. people like other people. They're not more deserving because they're rich and no one "deserves" to be rich any more than anyone else
I went to school with people way wealthier than we were. It meant a better school but it also it vaccinated me early against illusions towards rich people. I never envied them. I still don't. They should pay their damn taxes.
Lol! Yes.
Same! I never wanted wealth, i never felt the need to wear brand clothes to feel included. I wanted the fairness we didn't get when the wife of a millionaire drove around in a brand new porsche and got away from paying her kids tuition because she was unemployed. Or when my one rich friend's parents were extremely rude to servers and would bully their children relentlessly after coming home being stressed out from work - the children simultaneously saw their maid as subhuman and their mother figure.
no offense but for women its so much easier to break through the rich poor barrier.
Actually in the US, the top 10% income earners pay almost 70% of federal income taxes. Isn't that enough for you?
In retrospect was it worth , studing in that school?
I am a corporate attorney. Naturally, I work with the rich. The richer a client is, the more affronted they act about their tiniest demand not being met. They have a lot of trouble in comprehending that a lawyer is not an assistant or a therapist. I have had to drop the wealthiest of my clients for being treated shabbily. Whole heartedly agree with your video.
Did they at least pay you well?
Interesting. I would have thought they would feel like you are working WITH them not FOR them 😔
I have worked for the super wealthy too. I have been amazed by their greed. At one place I worked, just before thanksgiving, they had a raffle and the prize was a turkey. I was surrounded by men making millions per year and there was one janitor who came by every day who was so nice and did his job with a smile for everyone. He was also a single dad. Who won ? the CEO. I was sure he was going to donate the turkey to his secretary. Nope. He was thrilled that he won the turkey, bragged about how his wife already had bought their turkey and after thanksgiving , he told us all about how they had 2 turkeys on their table. All I could think about is how a decent person would have offered that turkey to the janitor so that he could have had food on his table too. Another time, in some convoluted way, a big 50" color TV at the office became "available" for free -- and the boss grabbed it for his multimillion dollar house (like he didnt already have multiple TVs at home). He spirited that TV away so fast. Again, I thought the decent thing would have been to offer it to one of the lower paid staff, but no. lastly, my mother was very sick and around thanksgiving, I sent a cake to the doctor's office for the staff who took care of my mother. after the holidays, I asked one of the nurses if they liked the cake. She told me they never had any cake because the doctor saw it and he took the whole cake home with him for thanksgiving.
Disgusting people
Unbelievable😢
one of the most valuable things my parents instilled in me, was how to be rich. so that in the event i became wealthy (or they stayed wealthy and i eventually inherit) i would know how to carry it with grace and be a blessing to those around us. but indeed, i could see how her peers, likewise first generation wealthy in my developing country, were not generous people. they can afford expensive purchases but can’t put in 1% of that to the lower ranking staff office fund. knowing how to be rich with dignity is learned, it doesn’t come naturally.
My sister worked for a company that had a CEO that would take freebies that were dropped off by vendors for the employees!! she finally spoke up and told the vendors what was happening and the next time someone brought something in the vendor stood there waiting for the staff to come out to enjoy the donuts and coffee he had brought for them. The CEO tried to come out and grab some and the vendor told him this isn’t for you. This is for your staff. Please respect that. 😮😮😮
This is a special thing in US culture: first me, myself, and I. These things wouldn’t happen in Europe.
You know, us middle class people are thinking we're poor because we compare ourselves to rich people in our society, but the truth is we are wealthy too. Quite a large proportion of the world's population is quite poor. Think about how many people are living under a tarp, cooking whatever they can forage over a fire outside while the kids play naked in the yard. No grocery stores, no health care, no fancy clothes or cars, living in what is basically a lean-to. We are very, very lucky.
Yup it’s all relative!
I remind myself of this all the time.
Natalie Rizzo However within US , many middle class people are not wealthy. I feel sometimes gratefulness that US is better off , is used as an excuse not to criticise the inequality within US . You can always be individually grateful but also recognise the inequality which is part of the society and not accept that uncritically. I feel that Chelsea and TFD manages that
I'm from Brazil and I am middle class here. Converting my income would place me very near the poverty line in the US, by the way. Let's talk about one "undeveloped" or "third-world" country, shall we? :) The middle class in Brazil is not so different from the US, except not even goods are cheap here, so even sneakers are financed. Very few people own their homes outright, most rent and some have a huge mortgage. There's "free" health insurance from the government, but it really is only good for terminal diseases. If you have cancer or a heart attack, go there, for routine checkups, don't. (I use it from time to time, so this is not hearsay) We all pay for extra health insurance through work or out of pocket.(I choose to pay out of pocket as needed - not an insurance plan - and rely on the government for anything more serious) What we do have is cheaper services. Cleaning services, hair services, that kind of stuff here is much cheaper than in the US, even adjusted for earning power. Most people in Brazil live in decent homes. Not pretty, not pinterest worthy, but with a roof, clean water, sanitation and trash collection. Most Brazilians are on the internet through their phones. Those phones are financed too. Favelas are the exception, not the norm. The trouble with favelas is that they are not incorporated, so you will never have a deed to your home, therefore it's worth next to nothing. Also, drug dealers use favelas as a base of operations because they are hard to get in - there's no planing, no streets - and they buy the cooperation of the community through "good works" and violence, whatever works. Homelessness is much more related to alcohol and drug abuse than to poverty. There are many programs dedicated to feeding and helping the homeless so any families you see today are gone tomorrow, what is left are the drunks and the crack heads. They are my unofficial neighbors. They do organize into those categories, sleep together and hang out together. The drunks are pretty safe, but I give the crack heads a wide berth. That is what I see from where I am, I have a deep mistrust in government statistics and politically focused "research".
You can't say that because it goes against the victim mentality which is very popular in the US. 🤷🏻♂️
The part about how the rich shut themselves away from the community they live in explains politicians very well.
Yea no shit. Dont know why someone thought trickle-down economics would actually work.
My daughter was on a scholarship to a private boarding school. Almosy all of the he rich kids had profound benevolent neglect. I never saw the rich parents show up except when absolutely required. I still know a few of the kids, and the rich kids (as opposed to scholarship kids) seem to be fairly successful, but really profoundly empty and disturbed. That class experience was so different than I expected.
"(as opposed to scholarship kids)" do you mean the scholarships kids didnt came out successful from there?
@@sarahfranco6802 They came out successful because they had a top notch education
@@SoulfulVeg oh ok
You have to be of some social means to be a scholarship kid at a boarding school tbh. Didn’t even know the us had boarding schools until well after graduating high school
The wealthy disconnect is so apparent by how many celebrities reacted to the Coronavirus pandemic lol
Right? I can't imagine having multiple large homes and staff to clean and cook for me and all that and then complaining about being stuck in my big beautiful house with its gorgeous view and private beach or whatever. How empty must people feel to be so unhappy when they have so much?
So true!
1. 3:55 Rich people Don't Care What they look like in Front Of People Who Aren't Rich 2. 7:53 Gender Dynamics Are Just As Complicated In Super Wealthy House 3. 11:38 That Lack of Empathy is Actually,Scientifically A Thing 4. 15:04 Most Rich People Don't Actually "Feel" Rich 5. 18:38 Work Addiction Amongst The Wealthy Is A Very Real Thing 6. 21:53 Money Doesn't Buy You Happines,But It Can.
Wha? Where are the time markers?? Go back and redo this!! ;)
Thanks
@@alf.2929 ehh :/
@@alf.2929 aight mate,done!
@@AasthaHingar ay ay,done!
After being married to a guy from a very rich family, one thing I learned is they do have empathy, plenty of it, but never for anyone outside their wealth category. His family adored anyone who was on par with them for wealth and would go out of their way to help them out including financially if they suddenly had a bad issue. This also included people who's kids used drugs, stole, got in trouble with the law etc. If they were rich, they were people. If they were poor, they were not. I received the same treatment at first since I lived in the same area as his family. He always made me keep quiet about living in the public housing section as he didn't want to freak them out. When they found out they suddenly decided I was a gold digger, transferred all of the money out of his name they kept there for tax reasons, and started treating me like I was trash. Every thing about me suddenly became a bad trait and the reason I was poor. My mother received the exact same government pension as they did (their reason for the hiding of assets) yet because she didn't have millions in shares and a home, she was a drain on society. Here is the great part. Since he wanted to keep control of me (it was an abusive relationship), he moved away from them with me. They wanted nothing to do with me. After 15 years I got an inheritance from my father who I only met once. It was enough to buy a house and car (he insisted on luxury ugh ) and some to live on. Of course he had to tell his family and anyone who would listen. Suddenly I was rich enough to be treated like a human again. They wanted to spend time with me, make me dinner, sending care packages, visiting, were nice and caring, asking if i needed help, offering gifts etc. I was even written into their wills and they showed me what they planned on giving me personally! My unacceptable poor people problems were now acceptable rich people problems. I have since escaped his violence and he and I are now the only heirs to their fortune. He spends his day playing computer games and collecting welfare while living in their home waiting for them to die. They are completely ok with that saying he just needs time to find his way (he is 44) while still judging 'welfare bludgers' for doing nothing all day.
wild . thx 4 sharing
Wow, crazy!!
Wow. The actual audacity! How did you manage to stay in their wills even after you broke things off with him?
They don’t sound rich. They sound entitled.
Thats nouveau rich for sure
This really hit home. I just started my legal career and its absolutely appalling how rude lawyers are to the support staff. It's like they don't even see them as people. The lawyers are every high earners make their own schedule, take many days of leisure, but get pissed at their "help" for the slightest inconvenience that isn't even their fault.
agreed. worked in the legal profession 10 years plus and lawyers can be the meanest ever
@@grammystipstricks3547 I wonder why
maybe their psychotic or coke heads
@@kay8698 what are you implying? Or is that a genuine question?
As someone who had dated someone from a rich family, totally accurate. It was like dating two different people depending on who was around.
100% accurate. An ex-girlfriend of mine came from old money. I don't know if I had experiences that were as extreme as Chelsea or you had. Still, I do vividly remember as a 19 yr old kid, that I picked up on her family's attitude towards other people very quickly, which could often be boiled down to: "if you didn't go to A,B,C elite school, have this type of job, or make X amount of money, you don't count."
“i wanted to be them, but i also resented them” me, at this very moment
My aunt was a housekeeper/nanny back in the 60s for The Bensons ( rich people, the sister of Loyd Benson a politician) and they treated her really nice and were very loving to her. I wonder if it’s just that we have all became less in touch with humanity and are selfish. My aunt occasionally bumps in to her old boss which these people are in their 80s and 90s and they greet her with so much love. This is in south Texas McAllen to be exact.
I would argue it’s because the wealthy became wealthier. Wealth disparities have rarely if not never been as large as they are now and the result is all of the behaviour detailed in this video. I’m glad your aunt had a good time in the 60s but rich in the 60s does not even touch the ultra rich of the 21st century
Great video, so accurate. Recently ended a relationship with someone who "thought" he was poor but has two boats (yacht club member also), two homes, two cars, a timeshare, etc. Entitled and a cheapskate, always wanted me, the working girl, to pay for his stuff because he was living on a "fixed income", since he retired early.
Omg
"One of the most insidious things about wealth is how keeping it secret can make you less accountable to the community you live in."
I only want to be rich enough to feel confident in my lasting security/comfort, to continue enjoying my hobbies, and to do what I want with my time. And to provide those things for my loved ones as well. Which, to be honest, is pretty rich! But if that day comes, I hope I can still see that that’s all I need.
Same here. But from what I understand when you reach that point things do change. And then you find yourself crying because you have to fly first class instead of getting on a jet 🤦🏻♀️ I know I've been many times in the situation where I'd say 'Once I have X amount in my bank account I'll relax' But then suddenly it feels not enough 🙄
Currently, that lifestyle would require lots of money. But think about this, we currently have the technology that we COULD create a post scarcity society. That would mean basic nutritious food, decent housing, and complete health care would be a right, not something to given in exchange for labor. With those basics met, we could all pursue our hobbies. And many hobbies lead to goods and services: craft-makers, writers, adventure sport guides, etc. The main barrier to a post scarcity society? The attitude of "I don't want to pay higher taxes so a bum on the street can go to the doctor for free." So many people are selfish, and it's tragic that so much human potential is wasted.
@@Ersa0431 You said this so beautifully. I wish the same thing. The basics for everyone, and still allow the incentive of wealth accumulation and greed, but everyone has shelter, food and medicine. We could do this. Its possible.
@@Ersa0431 Absolutely agreed. I watched a Mark Rober video recently that mentioned how many ppl say the smartest man to ever live was Einstein, but in all likelihood it was probably someone who never had their basic needs met and had to spend all their time looking for clean water etc. Even with the basic needs met, enough ppl would still be inspired to work and to advance technology and the arts. And lets be real, most ppl want to live above their basic needs.
It's telling that to be rich is to have basic needs met and feel secure/confident. We are often just fighting for that last piece of pie when the rich already have 9/10ths of it.
Totally felt Secret 1 when I was pregnant. In places where wealthier people gathered (say Business Class waiting lounges at airports) no one noticed a fairly pregnant woman to give up a chair. People with working class jobs routinely showed so much more kindness.
This is an exception, but I remember distinctly one wealthy lady I worked for growing up, who was, hands down, the best person I've ever known. She was the sweetest person. Never said a bad word about anyone, ever. She didn't complain about anyone. And I worked for her for years. I hope someday I can be like that.
Yesss! I once worked for an ultra-high net worth couple that treated me and my son no different than anyone else in their circle. Working for them gave me firsthand insight as to the BLESSING one's monetary wealth can be to others. I'd just returned from out of state prior to working for them after leaving an unhealthy relationship and had almost nothing in the sense of material possessions, not even dishware. It was around Christmas time. Do you know they furnished my entire apartment for me? Even down to a balcony set, fairy lights, and throw blankets. My heart always becomes light when I think of them and pray that their relationship and happiness is ever-enduring and remain grateful to them 'til this day for the kindness they bestowed upon us both.
@richbabegangwithsandral.ro2736 , beautiful story. My grandfather, Mayflower descendant and NE textile wealth, always told and showed us that the point of having "extra" money was to help others with it. He and my grandmother treated everyone well. They were sensitive to the needs of others and acted on what they saw. Their children were the same type of people. My grandfather worked until he was 83 and knew the names of his employees, current and past.
I totally get this. When you come across wealthy people like you describe, it's wonderful.
My father put his foot down -- he would NOT allow me to apply for a job at the local country club. There was NO way he was going to let his daughter work around"those drunk a**holes" .
Good advice from dad!
For an awful example of entitled behaviour, look at the Financial Times's exposure of the Presidents' Club at the Dorchester Hotel in London.
My daughter worked at the local county club. She had a good experience. We have a home in the community, so that didn't hurt.
@@ericl452 I worked at the country club one summer. We lived in the neighborhood, but weren’t members. We didn’t really belong in the neighborhood. I think my dignity and the fact that some members knew me set me apart.
The fact that rich people always seem to feel like they do not have enough is so true. I work for a very well known European designer and it’s grounded me so much as I’ve come to realise that one can never be fully satisfied with material goods. You might be able to spend £2000 on a bag but you can’t buy the £10.000 jacket. Or you might even be able to get the jacket but what about the £250.000 necklace? It’s a stupid example but really made me realise that materialistic goals can never be fulfilled because of lifestyle inflation.
This is so wise - it will never fill you up in fact it enslaves us
"He who befriends poverty is the truly rich. Necessity requires little, avidity knows no bounds." - Seneca
Often because, they're too dumb or lack self-motivation to educate themselves to move up to the next level... can't do anything for those poor souls. Just lay back and watch them suffer. Poverty is the root of all evil.
A point about that lack of vision. I went to an Ivy League school with many of the very wealthy as a poor kid. So I had a job in the dining facilities. When I was eating there with friends, I was always struck by how many of them seemed to not even look at the messes they left behind, which were worse than any low-rent place I'd ever worked at. It came up once. "Well, they got people for that." "Yeah, me." Awkward pause.
I often think the really rich people who seem happiest are the eccentrics who give up work and are shunned by their fellow rich folk.
Hai medam
Eccentrics are happier I think
just watched a 26 minute video and remember and understood every minute of it. Chelsea you're a fantastic speaker and storyteller. I'm not going to assume that was a one-take, but you've really sharpened that skill to a point!
Centennial Research Yaasss she def is 👌🏽
yes! I thought, I am not about to watch a 26 minute video, but now I want to watch ALL her videos! Soo good.
I love this quote from Mahatma Gandhi: "Live simply, so that others may simply live."
I grew up with “poor” parents, food stamps and such. Worked really hard and I live a “middle class” life, I will be sure that if/when I pass the 6 figure threshold I will CONTINUE to tip servers at the least 20%, my pizza delivery ppl $5, & Lyft Drivers the best tips available. Chelsea’s message in this video is important, what’s little to you may be HUGE to someone else... And most importantly, RESPECT ppl in whatever position they hold, we all have equal life value.
I stopped being friends with a woman who regularly demanded we all go to $25-30 lunches EVERY time, when the rest of us wd be happy with drive thru sometimes. She had a lot more money than the rest of us, but she'd calculate her 15% (cheap!). The rest of us wd toss a $5 or $10 the table towards the tip, as we'd all waitressed at some point. We'd all be telling her, "Peel off a $5". Only one who never tipped for the whole table. Only one who had SO many special orders. Cheap and nasty!
Absolutely. Respect and basic dignity to all should be fundamental tenets of human interaction and early socialization. How different society would be if this was ingrained in each and every child from an early age.
yeah i work in stem as as ive made more money ive finally been able to properly tip. i don't understand rich ppl that don't. like as a broke college student i always fantasized about leaving $10 or even $20 tips and now i can actually do it!!
I teach my children to give all you can, gave my last $5 to a Home Depot bucket in front of a child playing piano @ the beach yesterday, my kid..” you said you had no more $ for arcade “ … yea, bc I needed it, until I saw someone who needed it more.
@Neeni M , my daughters are both into STEM, I hope they can find their place, succeed and continue to share along the way. My husband gets embarrassed about me stopping to dig my pockets and contribute to whomever I come across, but my children will remember I did so. 😉
They do say that the measure of a person isn't how they treat their equals but their "inferiors".
The best reflection of character is how someone treats those who can do nothing for them.
TFD is getting me through quarantine
Totally agree. It's something I truly look forward to every day.
I really like your straightforward approach about the wealthy elite, based on what you experienced, directly from them. I remember taking a human resources class in college. One of the things we touched on was employee compensation and the three different levels of compensation that exist. Level 1 is survival - more money allows you to pay for the necessities. Level 2 is lifestyle - more money allows you to buy/do things that craft the type of life that you want. Level 3 is the highest and it's strictly ego - more money allows you to show off to the other high earners and feel good, in comparison with them. Among the other things you've highlighted, that are pretty sad (but in line with this same idea) is that money suddenly becomes worthless and instead of being something that gives you what you want, it actually curses you by becoming a tool of competition.
15:23 This happens in middle classes too. I noticed it viscerally when I started taking public transit. I started noticing what a horrible opinion some of my fellows had of the really poor.
There is a story that is popularized in the media and in popular money-advice books, that rich people live un-fancy lifestyles and are smart with their spending. I attended a private college where I was surrounded by children of millionaires, and this is not at all what I observed. What I saw were people who shopped a lot and were very wasteful with their money. They didn't suffer consequences of wasteful spending because there was always more money. But yes, if you asked them, they would probably assume that they managed their money more responsibly than their not-rich classmates who maybe overspent their tight budgets before the next payday.
I dated a rich guy very briefly in college who's parents bought him a house to live in. He told me I should move in with him because I'm so poor and he's so rich.......but like I was paying for my own apartment and my own bills, and he was the one who's parents gave him an allowance! I told him he should move in with me! I mean I'm the more stable one here, he "has more money" but that's not his money, it's his parent's money, and as of now he's expecting it to keep coming in forever and ever without effort, and I knew how to hustle to make my money.......spoiler we didn't in fact move in together, I left and laughed about him with my friends
So true! I lived with a few wealthy girls during university and they were SOOOO wasteful. They also had no idea how to cook the most basic things - like boiled eggs.
The difference is these people you went to school with didn't earn that. It's different when you're the person earning the wealth.
It's not their kids that media and popular money advice books are talking about, but the parents. The kids you hung out with definitely didn't learn that then.
I believe the book that inspired this information to which many are referring is called "The Millionaire Next Door" by Dr. Thomas J. Stanley. This book is primarily about first-generation millionaires who started with very little and worked their way up to millionaire status. The lifestyles of these millionaires differ from the millionaires to which you are referring which are those who generally come from family money (generations of wealth) who may or may not spend wisely. In this book, Dr. Stanley also makes a distinction between those who spend lavishly but accumulate lower levels of wealth, and those who may earn less than $100K per year, but whose spending and saving habits have allowed them to accumulate $1 million or more in net worth. It's a great book, and I highly encourage everyone to read it!
To them "I was basically just a really advanced smartphone" 🤣🤣🤣
Hello madam
The "lack of wealth transparency can make you more removed from your community" thing makes so much sense, it's such a great insight. It's a great way to word so much of the struggle between "rich" and "poor" that's seen IRL and in media. There's probably an argument to be made about hiphop culture, flexing, etc and how flaunting cash, expensive cars, and all that shit isn't perceived as rude because it's transparent, you are showing that you made it. Not exactly "tied" to the community but it is transparent at least
You can't win the war of financial peace, if you don't live on less than you make, so you can give money back and have money to invest. Save less and invest more to attain a financial peace
You are right my friend, how many millionaires do you know who got rich from living above their means ? This is why I am diversifying and investing more in cryptocurrencies and it has paid off.
Bitcoin is the future of the digital world, investing in Bitcoin has made me financially stable. It is a pity that many people who are going through intense difficulties have ignored bitcoin, when bitcoin can improve their financial situation.
I tried to invest in bitcoin, but due to the huge money I lost trying to trade on my own, can anyone suggest me a broker who can help me help invest in bitcoin
@@rodri5511 I have earned a lot from bitcoin trading which has been my main source of income.
@@rodri5511 I faced a lot of inexperience and struggled with a series of recurring losses during my rookie days trying to profit from trading. I win almost three times thanks to the help of Christopher George
My husband used to have rich friends, and one of them asked to borrow $500 from him, claiming that she really needed it. He scraped together the money and when he asked to be paid back weeks later, she got all defensive and claimed that it was ridiculous that he wanted to be paid back because it "wasn't that much." To me, that is where I lose most of my empathy for the rich (on top of working in customer service for years): their constant desire to take from others while not appreciating any of it.
I think it's not only the rich friends but also friends and family of modest means. If I were to "lend" money to friends & family, I wouldn't really have any expectation of getting that money back. I would just considerate an act of charity. If I were really insistent of getting that money I would have them sign a promissory note but if you get into a fight about that money, you lose that friend/family possibly forever. It's your choice whether that's worth it.
If you have to borrow 500 bucks from a friend, you aren't rich.
@Katie Willard That woman is an absolutely disgusting piece of 💩. I know a couple of very well worth off people who do not play those games...so I have no room of allowance for despicable acts like that. Sorry that happened to your husband.
You’d never want to lent money to anyone, unless you prepare to depart from your money.
@@alf.2929 "t's your choice whether that's worth it." She said that her husband "scrapped" to get that money to his friend. That means that he had no choice but to ask for it back.
I did the nanny thing for some richie riches. Kids were great. Parents...👀 Thanks for sharing your WEALTH of information (I regretted that while writing it).
@Robby Dey true, but it is very much out of their own volition, in most cases. They could be very comfortable, have lots of freedom, but because they 'need' more, they keep working your butt off. As Chelsea said, the extremely wealthy are often a bit sad...
Our old babysitter who is now an educated kindergarten teacher told me that she works now in the most wealhy area of our city and the parents are awful.
I've been listening to a lot of financial youtubers and it's very refreshing to find a channel be so frank about the negative effects of money transforming people into miserly dragons atop their piles of gold. Money is a tool that should be used for good and helping your community. This was great!
I am a political activist, and I find what you are saying to be very informative. It explains a lot, for example the well-known correlation between income inequality and social problems.
I worked at PetSmart in grad school, and a customer had two dogs jumping at the gerbil habitat, scaring the crap out of them. When I asked him to please move his dogs because they were scaring the animals, his response was quite literally, "How dare you? I spend more money here than you make in a year."
Gross.
Disgusting
So what the hell does the amount of money he spends have anything to do with it? Again, no empathy for the poor little animals.
I love how TFD is slowly becoming more pissed at economic injustices
Fake. Clicks. Views.
Dude I haven't been on this channel for a minute her Bernie rant turned me off. Now I am back and out the gate the hateraid is strong lol.
When you reach a point where you’re no longer dependent on your community, that’s when the stress really cranks up because your community is now dependent on you.
We ALL need to feel that way. We live in a country where a small number of people have everything and the vast majority struggle to even pay rent. I was thinking the other day that the money Elon Musk spent to shoot his friggin CAR into space - Just THAT Money - could have paid the rent during the pandemic of a little over 217,000 people. Those people who are about to be evicted during a pandemic through no fault of their own. We ALL should be pissed and vote against any and all politicians who make that gap wider.
@@dr.braxygilkeycruises1460 Thats so twisted - rich people have money because the vast majority worked for it. Are you penalizing rich people because they have better money management or are more innovative/creative than yourself. Stop your bitterness
Employed as a Earlier Education teacher. There are days I am so happy I could fill The Universe with my joy and love. Living the life of a minimalist and don't have a lot of money. My personal Happiness is everything to me. Jesus christ my Lord and Saviour is at the centre of my life. The Holy Spirit lights my road in life. I feel so sorry for these people. Kind regards from Ireland. Kate 💕👱♀️
I very much enjoyed this video. When I took Income Taxes in college, I was taught that the way to make communities work was to tax the upper class at 90% and offer tax-free municipal bonds. The theory was the tax-free interest would be desirable and that the wealthy would make the investment in communities in order to protect their investments in municipal bonds and that everyone wins. This was in the early 80s. It made a lot of sense and I've seen it play out now that the effective tax rate for the super wealthy tends to be nonexistent.
The problem is the rich move if taxes are high...
@@frida507 yep. Good old human nature.
I remember an interview that Tony Robbins did about money, where he was talking about an interview he did with a multi-millionare. He commented that 'the secret to wealth is gratitude'. As the multi-millionare put it, "if you're constantly pissed of all the time, but have money, the quality of your life is 'pissed off'."
I'm middle class, but I feel like I still need to make sure I don't fall into some of these pitfalls: of being unsatisfied with what i have or being less charitable or being isolated from my community. This was a good reminder for me as a middle class worker.
I was just watching this video with my family and my mom and I jolted when you mentioned the Google Glass study at NYU. I was one of the research assistants that reviewed that footage to see where the subjects’ attention went but obviously I didn’t know what the hypothesis was at the time. It is so cool to see that it made its way into a video from a channel I watch! Thank you for your coverage of this fascinating topic.
That is awesome. You contrubuted to a little milestone in history.
Important: Do not confuse Rich people with Rich LOOKALIKE . Money only amplify what we are inside. (Like drunk person)
Based on the title and thumbnail I thought this was gonna be one of the other girls making some cringey tone-deaf remarks/promotion of hustle culture. I was pleasantly surprised. Great video as always, Chelsea.
Have you MET our queen chelew? She's as anti hustle culture as can be
Lmao same here 😂
Yeah that thumbnail needs some adjustment. If I didn't already follow TFD elsewhere and had a sense the tone MIGHT not match the thumbnail and title, there's no way in hell I woulda clicked on this and given it a chance. I love Chelsea and I don't think she quite saw that.
That YACHT club story was too good! The rich not feeling like they are rich really got me- I work for a man who would absolutely be considered rich- he owns a town house in one of the richest areas of London, a house in the country, various other properties that he rents out, a large art collection, has lunch most days in Michellin restaurants yet because he often mixes with the super rich for his job he compares himself to them and therefore feels like he is hard done by. He then looks down on anyone 'below' him to compensate for this.
sad dude....
My dad came from nothing. He grew up in a Adobe house in a ranch in Mexico and has no pipe lines or electricity. Today. He has companies, employs 150 people,, has 2 properties, cars, and helps both my moms family and his own with money. He dose feel a little disconnected and yet helps people he meets all around with what he can. He loves his luxury. He also is extremely creative and live of his ideas and of course still wants more because as he loves though life, he learns more and wants to keep on going. He also wants to leave money behind for his kids because he understands how hard the climate (both financial and literal climate) is. So I don’t know, just wanted to share. I’ve been around all kinds of people and see a lot of what you say and also see amazing minds that move a lot of the world foreward. Just wanted to share.
I realllllly appreciate that this appeared to "age well" almost a year later. Myself, disabled and well under the poverty level, focused on communal living with my multigenerational household during the lockdown. As we simplified, we realized that we wanted more time to enjoy what we do, rather than being worried. The stimulus checks helped us process the fears and get a little bit of stable footing to work towards that financial freedom...so grateful for content like this that helps bridge gaps of knowledge and perceptions with personal insights. I'm hopeful that the value of *time* is starting to really sink into everyone, that is a commodity that can't be stored for later...
Wealth just amplifies what’s already there. Looking to be a giving, empathetic, and mindful wealthy person.
Wish we had more people like you😊
Here's the thing, which is even talked about in many religions, if you are truly emphatic you will never be a truly wealthy person. You would only keep enough to comfortably support you and your family and all of the rest would be given away to those in need or maybe to save the world from climate change. Many wealthy people are very generous, it the reason we have museums and many non-profits. But truly empathetic? No one actually needs a private plane, or a yacht or a big newly built house and if the wealthy were truly mindful and emphatic there would be no extremely wealthy people.
@Robby Dey that is extreme nonsense. They started their foundations largely to be able to evade/avoid taxes while pretending to be philanthropic. Isabel is absolutely right. The reason they are this wealthy is because they WANT to retain their power over others while convincing the lesser mortals that we should be so grateful to their "generous" selves for giving us any money at all. this is how capitalism thrives
@The Loner Millionaire hmm maybe. There are for sure people that live outside their means. I'm still not sure I see a difference though, extreme wealth that we are talking about does not exist without either beinging born into royalty or being part of a consumer system. And for the sake of argument how is it moral to be a rich anit-consumer minimalist who is happy and comfortable with their life, but just lets money build in the bank because they want high net worth? How is that person truly empathetic to the rest of the world at the deepest meaning of the word? That sounds like the addiction part of work and wealth the video was talking about. Not sure I understand where you're coming from
Same. I've learned wealth is not avoid what you have but who you are as a person. I save but I also try to help others and give back in ways that I can (I'm furloughed right now, so I try to give $20 or $25 here and there when I can.)
I prepare tax returns. The clients who generously contribute to charities are generally not the rich ones. It never ceases to shock me when a person with a half million dollar income makes damn sure to get their deduction for the sole $50 charitable contribution that they made during the year - obviously one that they felt compelled to make to their kid's school or to a friend's charity race. These high income types are also the biggest whiners about having to pay taxes, and they expect me to feel sorry for them and commiserate. What a bunch of babies!
Joan McManus Same. The ones pulling down huge money are the same ones who only give to their practically compulsory workplace United Way drive and they get SuperBowl tickets or something for their “generosity.” Fun story, though. I have friends whose accountant was their matchmaker. He noticed that they both messaged him very early in the morning and both tithed. He told them they should meet and they’ve been married over 25 years now.
Extra attention to detail without even being asked!
Most of my wealthy clients donate a hell lot of money each year. One is worth $14B and his will says 100% goes to charities after he dies (his family and kids can support themselves). Another one started donating 100% of his trust income to charities every year because he is still able to work to generate more income and doesn’t need the extra money at the moment. Last year alone he donated $6M. The point is not all rich people are assholes, especially when they built their own wealth from scratch. Some were born with money but still have to rely on the parents to nurture them and teach them the right thing. No doubt they are just a hell lot more fortunate than majority of the people and hopefully to make good use of it to give back to the community. Of course I’m not saying they can’t be assholes because some just are.
Not a bunch of babies at all. Smart people who know how to handle their money.
michelletsf 100% goes to charities after he dies? None of that goes to his own family? Idk, that sounds kinda...odd to me. Almost like they’re more interested in their reputation after they die than taking care of their family. Like a weird form of martyrdom. But idk this person or what his family/children do for a living, so 🤷🏾♀️
Nice content! Few years back i was assistant to a wealthy pen artist and within the short period i worked with him i observed that he had quite a chunk of investment everywhere, stocks, crypto, dividend investing to name a few, so he had revenues coming in from all angles. And in a year his worth doubled. With this i learned that the rich stay rich by investing.
Yeah i think i agree with this but the problem now is getting to make the right investments, Lots of people tend to lose their money while investing thereby making them lose interest and also end up discouraging other individuals around them.
I think the major challenges investors face may range from controlling impulsiveness to the frail of compulsion. Most newbies and would-be investors often undermine and most often neglect the importance of technical analysis with regards to investing. Technical analysis overly predicts the movement of asset prices regardless of what is happening in the wider or broader market. Essentially, the process involves studying the paths of a particular asset movement in the past so as to establish a sustainable pattern that can be used to predict future movements or better still get an investment advisor who'd guide you and help you manage your portfolio just like my boss back then, He was working with an IA Lorna Rose Sabbia and i would bet he still does. I can boldly recommend her because i've witnessed her performance first hand. She's the real deal.
@@pieterbakker5056 Thanks for the recommendation, could you drop a link to his IA or I could drop mine instead
@@pieterbakker5056 Thanks for sharing this, You've given me a long sort after info, will check out the IA immediately.
Yes true keep investing. And when you buy something pay it cash to avoid paying interest. The real wealthy people has no debts.
I fully agree with you that when people perceive you as “lower status”, they ignore you and you don’t really matter for them
The best takeaway is a reminder that wealth, at any level, can isolate you. In Texas, it's difficult to be independent without a car due to long distances between neighborhoods, grocery stores, etc. + heat. I had a friend who got all the way through college + a few years after without a car. I recognized that even though she undoubtedly was inconvenienced by having to rely on others at times, she had years of experience to practice flexibility, thankfulness and maintain real relationships with people who would be willing to give her rides. Here I was, recognizing that I was missing out on some crucial concepts just cause I had independence with my $6k car. This is truly present, no matter the income level.
The first point is SO true 😅 I was hired to “help” with a New Years Eve house party for wealthy people in their late 30s-early 50s. They all were acting like a bunch of entitled and messy teenagers by the end of the night, and it was in no way worth the money they paid me. Old drunk guys felt entitled to touch me and say inappropriate things about my looks. The hostess slipped me a $20 and told me to drive to the gas station to buy her some cigarettes. The worst was when one guy spilled his drink on the floor. Cleaning up was a part of my job, but he yelled into the kitchen for the host to toss him a rag, and I thought Oh cool, he’ll wipe it up himself. Instead, this asshole called me over, dropped the rag next to the puddle on the floor, smiled and said “There you go.” :) I cant recall how much they paid me, but to this day I remember how small, insignificant, and used those people made me feel.
When one sees how drunk and how often rich people get drunk, it should be pretty obvious that some part of them is trying to run away from awareness of their gaping personality flaws.
This honestly gave me the extra kick in the ass that I needed. My mother worked as a housekeeper to many different wealthy folk, and sometimes, they required "help" for parties. So I was also sometimes recruited by my mother to volunteer. I was never treated that badly, cause I was a kid, but seeing someone else with a similar experience helped emphasize how weird it was.
Not to take away from your experience in any way but I once went to a late night house party of my co-workers from my pizza joint (most of us made minimum wage and no tips). There were a few people who got drunk including one who was crawling around on the floor and barking. It was really weird. I think drunken parties are pretty crazy no matter the income level.
Same thing happened to me as I was hired as “help” as they say. Also I got a flat tire on the way there which ate up more than what I got paid.
:(
The rich have problems that make them unhappy, the poor have problems that make them miserable. Their is a difference between unhappiness and misery.
As someone who graduated as an scholarship student in school filled to the brim with kids from rich families, I've had the wool pulled out of my eyes a long time ago... Gods, the amount of bullying going on in that school was unprecedented! Can you believe that a graduate from another class embezzled graduation money and bought a car with it? And he somehow got out of it squeaky clean (moneeey) and became a politician later on? Man, I was SO glad I told my family "Nah, don't mind the party, let's all go traveling together in summer". Dodged a bullet there. The only reason I continued studying there was because they had an insane amount of infraestructure, like, excellent computers, books, labs, you name it. Enabling me to learn whatever I wanted and paying for my participation in competitions I would have no budget for otherwise was the only reason that place was worth any of this madness... They need some hardworking teens in there to save face and make them look good, and desperate scholarship students are perfect for that. Well, as soon as I left, I happily dragged their name through the mud to anyone who cares to listen. It did have some repercussions... For one, they don't organize graduation parties anymore pfft.
So glad you made this. I was getting sick of "wealthy habits" that glorified the rich. They aren't all that worth looking up to, at least not a bulk of them.
Maham Zahid so the poor should be glorified instead lol
@@aokosakano3037 nowhere did she even imply that.
@@aokosakano3037 Why is being poor such a moral failing to you people? I'm not saying you should look up to poor people but damn, y'all act like poor people are a virus. There are poor people with great work ethics and personality traits who still can't make it to millionaire or billionaire status.
@@lil.ms.j7156 In a way, she did.
@@Bloombaby99 I see being poor as a type of sickness. It's really a disease of mindset. I know because there was a time when I was poor.
When I moved to an “upper-middle class” neighborhood as an adult, I was shocked by so many of these exact things. People were terrible to each other and I really missed that sense of community that we had in our previous lower income neighborhoods. We have since moved to a neighborhood with a much better sense of community and we are much happier. One thing I will add is that sometimes “wealthy” people are in terrible debt. You might look at the big houses, boats, trips etc and think these people have no worries and piles of money they don’t know what to do with. But more often than you might imagine, these people have out-spent their large incomes to keep up with the perceived wealth of others and are bogged down with large debts. Also, when wealthy people say they are “comfortable” it is because they are trying to say “I know I’m wealthy, I’m just trying to appear modest.”
I went to school at a ghetto neighborhood and was also treated badly. At least in a wealthier neighborhood, you're more connected to what feels like normal people, rather than people whose futures seem to be in prison, out in the streets, or cleaning floors.
So true,that's why some of them end up doing ponzi schemes.
When it comes to investing, diversification is key, that’s why I engage in sectors based on projected growth. There’s no shortcut to getting rich, but there are smart ways to go about it
I engage in different kinds of prolific investments such as launchpad IDOs, Crpto, Stock, NFTs, and vice versa through proper planning and management of a widely known Investment Professional, and so far acquired over 500K $ as a return.
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Disgusting bots.
#metadobetter
@@misstekhead innit how stupid.
I grew up tangentially related to wealth. My Mom's side of the family was well off, but she hated that world, so I didn't grow up completely immersed in it. I also hated that world. Especially going to country clubs. The level of rude I've experienced wearing my target bathing suits and second hand clothes was deplorable. That said, I am about to enter a field where I will likely make 6 figures pretty quickly. I'm hoping that my mostly middle class upbringing, my mostly impoverished adulthood, and my empathetic personality will protect me from becoming like the folks I hated growing up.
The fact that you even have these thoughts is a pretty good sign you’ll be grounded if you do end up on the wealthy end of things. You’ll need to be well in to 6 figures to be considered rich though. Sadly, 100k-350k is only considered upper middle class in todays US economy.
“...when these people bring in a bonus that would literally be enough to retire on...” I’m sorry, what.
See CEO bonuses (cash compensation plus stock awards). For instance, the CEO of Kroger received a total of $11.3 million for last year, not including his salary.
Pffft if I had 1.5 Mil, I'd retire RIGHT NOW... Nevermind 11 mil. 😅 I can live good on 3k a month.
@@emiliabolsas That's an insane number!
"Tesla CEO Elon Musk awarded stock worth more than $700 million as electric car maker hits goals" www.usatoday.com/story/money/cars/2020/05/28/tesla-ceo-elon-musk-compensation-salary-pay/5278971002/
@@emiliabolsas That. Is. Insane. Growing up in the lower middle class has given me a complete blindspot on how much money is actually out there in the world. It's something I wrestle with often, in terms of what is just.
This one's TED talk-worthy.
Seriously Thank you!
Konrad Mikolaj Krawczyk no, it’s not.
Yup, there's not enough walking, hand-waving and talking about nothing for TED-worthy speech.
Agreed
Sure is!
life tip: know the names of the people around you. the security guard at your building, the janitor at your work, make eye contact, be kind. these people are more valuable than you know.
I used to work for a celebrity radio host that made $7mil a year and saw their spending habits and investments (or lack thereof). It was very eye opening to see how they spent their wealth and taught me a lot of what NOT to do when I make money like that. It also taught me a lot about trusting the people around you, because when you make money like that there will be all kinds of people around you for all different reasons and you will be treated differently as well.
What did they spend their money on?
@@Nikolasto77 probably constantly buying designer brands, luxury jewellery and first class/private travel, some people waste all their salary no matter how high and end up living paycheque to paycheque
Yes. This is true.
I remember studying at a school dominated by well off families. Most of the kids there ended up being bullies to anyone who wasn't up to par. I was very quiet and often got picked on. But when they saw my house, they suddenly changed since I was now "accepted". Later on, I found out one of my bullies wasn't actually well off. He was faking it and was dropped immediately by his friends. I steered clear away from that. Which goes to show how damaging this attitude was to young kids. Coz those bullies grew up to be horrible people.
This is so true. I nannied for a very wealthy family once and I was in that house for 3 months and the kids' mother didn't greet me or address me by name once. Never said goodmorning once...I couldn't understand it...But you're right, if you're not in their social class you're invisible
The mother must hate her life
That must have been so weird. I work as a care assistant for a young man with special needs who lives with his parents and I can't imagine walking in each morning and being basically ignored by the parents. I am fortunate that I work with two very kind parents and their awesome son.
@@DimaRakesah it was more a reflection of her mental/emotional state than anything else, tbh. At first I was really offended but then after a while I just didn't care. I'm glad you're with a family that is warm and makes you feel a part of them
@@Austenfan177 That's horrible!
I have friends working their way through grad school as nannies. They have similar experiences. I fail to comprehend this. The nanny is taking care of your most precious resource. The childrens' experiences with this person shapes their lives. The nanny is the one person I would definitely want to get know like the back of my hand. The relationship needs a level of familiarity why still maintaining professionalism.
I've been on both sides of the fence. Just like we cannot generalize about the middle or working class, we cannot gereralize about the rich. Just because you are rich does not make you a jerk and just because you are poor does not make you a saint. A comment below sums it up. Money makes good people better.... and bad people worse.
I believe that many of the people who work 70+ hours a week are afraid to be alone with their feelings. They constantly have to be doing something so emotions dont start to get the better of them. I agree with a lot of what you said, I also was a nanny, but thankfully I worked for some amazing families who werent so hellbent on getting more wealthy, and did have genuine concern for their children, but yes, moreso the woman then the men in a lot of cases.
EXACTLY
Money doesn’t buy class. It needs to serve a purpose, not just having money for having money. Great talk!
Off topic but your skin looks flawless. Hair too. 😍
This was a brilliant video. For many people, once their money and lifestyles go above a certain threshold, it corrupts them and they lose the genuine integrity that they once may have had.
I pretty firmly believe that money doesn't change people, only amplifies them. Maybe they were subduing it while they had less money.
Very informative video. Definitely not surprised by most of what she said. Love the use of facts and research. Proves that a lot of rich people are literally narcissistic and can be borderline sociopaths, but we won’t get into that discussion right now.
I love this because the title makes you think that it might be implying "secrets that make them rich instead of you" but really it's just great observations
I grew up and live in Germany where rich people behaviour is very differently. They keep to themselves and are very private about being rich. If the kids have friends that aren't from rich parents they might hesitate to ask them for a sleepover. My parents aren't rich by definition but defenitely upper middle class. I remember being embarrassed to ask other kids to visit me because I felt uncomfortable to admitting that I lived in a larger house.
There is still some embarrassment about being rich in the West. In my experience its more old money. I knew a girl who went to one of the best schools in my country... yet she wanted us to swear to secrecy that we wouldn't tell anyone she was rich. I mean... it was pretty obvious to us, but she wanted to be sure that new friends weren't judging her before they got to know her. And I totally understand it. You could go out to a bar and have no idea she came from a very wealthy family. I have met other billionaires... who actually had pretty depressing, lonely lives. A lot of people using them for connections, or secretly trying to make money out of these people. I actually pitied the billionaires that I had met, all except one from Mainland China who wanted me to donate my "eggs" so he could make a mixed race child to raise in Asia (he proposed that he would take care of the kid & educate them in China... umm no thanks!). He was married with kids that weren't very far from my own age. I hear in China its not a particularly uncommon thing in ultra rich circles. But I could never ever agree to such a thing on principle.
I live in the Eastern Hemisphere and face the same situation.
This is a strange concept to me as an American. Here, flaunting wealth is a practically a damn sport. Like I worked at a highschool in a well off neighborhood and some of the kids there were pretty upper-middle class or higher. I remember one kid came to school with a designer belt that had the logo on a huge belt buckle and went around school with his shirt tucked in just so that the label was always on display. It just seemed really sad to me to be so obsessed with showing off a stupid belt buckle. Meanwhile there were other kids at school who were struggling to eat 3 meals a day because their parents were so poor, but it was a good school so they probably wanted to stay in that town just to try to give their kid a bit of a leg up. In the next town over where living expenses were lower the schools were severely underfunded and looked down on, so a lot of parents were probably avoiding living there because their kids wouldn't get a good education. Yay for our severely unfair public school system...
Your voice, your words, your experience. I thank you for all of it.
how to use money to make yourself happy: 1. spend it on fun events and experiences with beloved ones, family and friends 2. spend it on good food with others 3. donate it on charities; or even better: create your own charity campaigns, and see how you affect other people's happiness
I need "Uh, spoiler alert, YOU'RE BOTH FRICKING PARENTS" on a t-shirt.
@Turururu I'm so glad you like it!
That's also why fathers don't "babysit" - they're just taking care of their child.
Imagine being a POC... I was part of a catering company and I would cater to super wealthy people, I remember catering a charity event in which the money went to the university I attended, the people at the president's table from my school would snap their fingers at me... They called me horrible things as I left the table, racist and sexist things (claiming I should go back to school when in fact I was attending college or saying she probably has like 10 kids at home) ... The president of the university didn't say anything. When I lashed out at a man who groped me he got me written up... I fucking hated catering their events. I feel shit just takes another level when you're not white and are only surrounded by racists and sexist rich assholes. The women were just as racist and mean.
If he's still the president of the university I hope you get in touch with your school's newspaper and expose him. Someone like that shouldn't have influence over education.
I am so sorry you had to go though that😔. Sadly, Its not a rich people problem, it's a human problem.
Great points, I was thinking about this when watching the video.
I'm a witness. You are 100% correct, Donna Herrera!!!
@@brielli6393 it's the valley, no one cares, hell we got flooded and COVID is super high, no one cares for us, one weatherman said Brownsville is a good place to hit there isn't many people. The whole valley flooded. No power, people are barely getting power after a week. Either it's quickly silence the few here or pretend they don't exist. No on cared about my story then. They most certainly don't now
If I were wealthy I’d become a traveling hermit. I couldn’t care less what “those people” think. I was taught by a very astute boss to stop comparing myself to others. It was one of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever gotten. And your list was dead on, thank you!
This is a wonderful, though-provoking piece. Thank you for sharing your experience with us, Chelsea.
I've seen one particular finance youtuber who frequently does these videos about his tips on how to make more money, and one of his tips is always to hang around with other "successful" people, and that by doing so, you too will be "successful". I get wanting to hang around people who have some drive and determination in life, but that's not how I pick my friends. I honestly couldn't care less how "driven" my friends are. If they are, great, but if I had to choose, I'd much prefer them to be kind, interesting, funny, generous, loyal, or one of the other many things that can make up a great human being besides monetary or career success. I know people can be monetarily successful AND have other good qualities, but identifying monetary success as a key factor to deciding who you surround yourself with just seems wrong to me.
Coming from a pretty well-off family, my grandparents (who are a slightly less extreme version of the people explained in the video) always tell me this. They tell me to find friends that are "useful" or can offer valuable advice and connections. While that in itself isn't a bad thing, they constantly emphasize to "keep to our social class" and not make friends with people who are only "fun" to hang around with because they're a waste of your time and ultimately not "useful". So yeah, I can verify that viewpoint in the wealthy community and trying to keep to themselves. Even when I heard it as a spoiled tween, it still felt very shallow and wrong to me, since I became friends with people not because they were "useful" to me, but because I genuinely like their companionship and we would always have a great time together.
Great article. I grew up poor and did not start making enough to pay bill's, put into my 401k, and go on vacation once a year till about 6 years ago (I am 50). I am so thankful for the way I grew up. I am very aware that wealth can be taken quickly. It is what helps keep me grounded. I am also thankful that my spouse and I are in a position to help our families when the need arises. I can totally see that if you are not careful, you can lose yourself as you gain wealth.
This is so wonderful and filled with little gems...it makes so much sense that with diminishing returns comes the insatiable appetite for MORE.
This is an excellent, detailed and very well thought out and presented video. Great job!
A couple years ago, I spent an afternoon working on a project alongside a member of the Sackler family. I kept waiting for an introduction that never came. Like, I was literally not seen in the room. It was very strange and this video definitely clarifies why.
I was a hostess a Ruth’s Chris and the way we were treated was disgusting. Treated like objects by other employees and the guests
And that's awful because Ruth's Chris isn't even that great! Haha but seriously I hate being dehumanized by anyone and I can totally agree that it happens more often than not.
The rich people that Chelsea is talking about don't eat at Ruth's Chris. I have worked service jobs in two different cities, one affluent and one not, and I was treated poorly in both.
name Oh I agree 100% RC isn’t the type of rich she’s talking about but they sure think it is!
Ruth's Chris?!! its a chain!! no one should be walking in there like they own the place LOL
Jax Herrington you’d think! But hey John Travolta did come in a couple years ago 😅😂
Thank you for making this video, you have such insight into life - insurance ? JUST KIDDING... ENJOYED listening to you & what you have to offer. Thank you...from NYC
I remember thinking I was in an "average family" back when I was a kid in the 1990s. By the time I got older and met some friends whose families were living on tighter budgets and were more marginalized I realized just how UPPER middle class my upbringing really was. I even used to wonder, as a kid, how anyone could ever live in such a miserable little box as...an APARTMENT!!! *gasp!* My entire childhood was spent being raised in a big, pretty suburban home with lawns and being driven every damn place. The lap of isolated luxury and privilege. The idea that millions of people around the world lived in apartments with hissing steam pipes and over-stuffed garbage bins lined up in asphalt alleys all seemed so dystopian to me. I dunno, maybe it was all the 80s movies I watched that featured run-down tenements and made them seem like sad places where unfortunate souls were just stuffed in like sardines. A cruel, ignorant, and classist thing to believe, of course! But when I was maybe like 14 or 15, I thought like that. I never thought I was being mean. I just thought I was a sophisticated young brat who had some class and standards and why would I ever want to settle for living in what I perceived to be an oversized set of stacked drawers for humans? And worse: why would I ever want to live in a place where I had to - dare I say it - share things?! With other people?! Perish the thought! (fucking LOOOOOOL I must've been sooo insufferable, I can't believe how much of a prick I was -___- ) Hilarious now that, as an adult, I'm earning enough to live in a cozy one-bedroom apartment in the downtown of the city that I love, without owning a lawn or a car, and I feel like I've won the goddamn fucking lottery! ^_^ It's a great place to live and I can walk/transit just about anywhere. I'm still very lucky and very privileged but back when I was growing up in the 'burbs I had no concept of how toxic my attitude used to be. I always thought that I should be getting the things that are better than average, and looking down on that which I assumed was "below average" when, of course, the reality of our world is that having ANY stable housing whatsoever is a big deal. And if people in situations of housing precarity could've known, back then, what I secretly thought of them... my god. They'd have been forgiven for wanting to punch me in the face for it! I was truly a fool. But living a life that's more integrated with others around me has helped to make me contemplate just how clueless I was, and made me appreciate all the wonderful things I have and the excitement of living in a city. Letting go of class smugness and my weirdly artificial loyalty to empty symbols of prestige was a huge benefit to me. It's so important to be humble and never forget that everyone out there, no matter how much their living conditions may deviate from ours, should be regarded as a human being first, and nobody deserves to be gazed down upon just for having less than you do!
This picture of wealth is SO DIFFERENT from what I grew up around in an Arkansas farming town, though I guess I also grew up in that “country club” circle, but the wealthy seemed very active in my part of the community and were generally nice to be around. Someone who owned 8 polo horses (plus those at other barns I think) would be eating at one of the 10 restaurants in blue jeans and was always very nice. My barn’s owner would carry hay in her new Range Rover and sit in a dirty stall with our new kittens to play with them. I can’t imagine trying to be polite to people who live in such a different world that they can’t show empathy.
Those sound like what I call country millionaires. Often but not always 1st or second generation millionaires ir just in places where there's really nothing to overly flaunt money on. I've known a few of those. In one town the area started growing a lot and they built a huge luxury neighborhood. I asked the millionaire i knew if they looked at the new homes. They laughed and said no that's for people who want everyone to know they have money and want to spend it. They have nothing in i need and don't already have where I live. My plan is to keep my money.
How did they treat minorities or LGBTQ people?
@@tahajidedes5567 I was just about to make the same comment. The video seems to describe people that I call "city rich"... there is indeed a different group called "rural rich" that isn't talked about probably for the very reason that they DON'T flaunt their wealth in the ways described in these videos. I know exactly what you mean: they will be sitting in the diner with old jeans and a flannel button-down shirt and you won't know who they are unless someone from the community tells you. They spend their money on land and tend to invest in the community (this is just based on what I have seen of course I don't claim to be omniscient).
Because there's a different between the rich and someone who has money. I know many rich people who were very nice especially those on the country side.
@@granolagirl4972 because people compare themselves with others. In say Annapolis, city meant comparing with other rich people, often people a LOT richer than you, while when you live in a small town, there simply aren't that many other rich people to compare/compete with...
Rich people: I don't have to interact that much anymore with my community, cause I'm safe and wealthy. Me: I want to be wealthy, so I don't have to talk to anybody #saveme
Lol, you summed up my dream! X'D
Yep 👍🏻
Wow.... I love this... Thanks for sharing this. Gave us a whole understanding and a comprehensive, in-depth perspective we couldn't have gotten elsewhere that easily. Always be grateful for everything.
Honestly, I have worked for wealthy individuals without having a bad experience. Everyone has been highly empathetic, cooperative and kind to me. A lot of bonuses, good clothes, fancy food and great conversations, maybe Ive been lucky, but I don’t think money can make you good or bad, it only makes you more of what you really are.