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Border Officer

Markiplier
2021 ж. 24 Қаң.
5 358 331 Рет қаралды
Жүктеу

Border Officer is NOT a rip-off of Paper's Please. It is SO MUCH MORE. And coincidentally so much less...
Edited By ► / rad_r
And ► / lixiantv
Play Border Officer ► store.steampowered.com/app/10...
Awesome Games Playlist ► • Awesome Games!

Пікірлер

  • Today's lesson: don't get close to markiplier with a fork

    @hosseinsoltani1117@hosseinsoltani11173 жыл бұрын

    • Or even worse......a spork.

      @macklinillustration@macklinillustration3 жыл бұрын

    • Spoons are okay though, even though we all know spoons are the most dangerous weapon of all and are ready to ensue the inevitable mass destruction of humanity as we know it :)

      @RiskItForAChoccyBiscuit@RiskItForAChoccyBiscuit3 жыл бұрын

    • @@RiskItForAChoccyBiscuit I am scared of you😶

      @walkerwilliams-rigsofrodst3316@walkerwilliams-rigsofrodst33163 жыл бұрын

    • @@walkerwilliams-rigsofrodst3316 You should be scared of the spoons 🥄

      @RiskItForAChoccyBiscuit@RiskItForAChoccyBiscuit3 жыл бұрын

    • what about a spoon. A spoon is harmless

      @LadyTenjoin@LadyTenjoin3 жыл бұрын

  • “We’re too poor to have a clock” Me: Don't do it don’t do it don’t do it don’t do it “Just like my childhood all over again”

    @cryptid4351@cryptid43513 жыл бұрын

    • When I was a child, we couldn't afford eggs, we had a chicken but we had to kill it for our own entertainment, also nice pfp, memento mori

      @Mentis_Mori@Mentis_Mori3 жыл бұрын

    • *Tic. Tac. Tic. Tac. Tic. Tac.*

      @gabrielpineirogarcia2078@gabrielpineirogarcia20783 жыл бұрын

    • @@gabrielpineirogarcia2078 unus annus unus annus.... Words that will forever be immortalized in our memories Memories are forever after all

      @Mentis_Mori@Mentis_Mori3 жыл бұрын

    • @Cryptid What cryptid are you? Hee Hoo or The Gongoozler

      @spartanonionproductions1137@spartanonionproductions11373 жыл бұрын

    • @@spartanonionproductions1137 I am SCP-11325

      @cryptid4351@cryptid43513 жыл бұрын

  • Mark faced everything in this game. But the thing that broke him?: "'I needed to be more energetic in the bed' NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

    @justheredontaskwhy9578@justheredontaskwhy95783 жыл бұрын

    • “ITS TOO CLOSE TO HOME”😂🤣😂🤣

      @SftHrtBrsKnckls@SftHrtBrsKnckls3 жыл бұрын

    • @@SftHrtBrsKnckls XDDDDDDDDD

      @justheredontaskwhy9578@justheredontaskwhy95783 жыл бұрын

    • Theres no place like home!

      @Sega428@Sega4283 жыл бұрын

    • Priorities man

      @wjzav1971@wjzav19713 жыл бұрын

    • Lol Mark: This hits too close to home. Me: Is everything alright with you and Amy, dude?

      @lilliangarza4954@lilliangarza49543 жыл бұрын

  • I cant help but laugh at the fact that Mark was giggling over the woman in the club who was all gumby like- but proceeded to not notice the woman with a popcorn bag on her head-

    @Rainworld475@Rainworld4753 жыл бұрын

    • Priorities

      @13DarknessGirl666@13DarknessGirl6663 жыл бұрын

    • @@13DarknessGirl666 *Professionals have standards*

      @Meh-nv6id@Meh-nv6id3 жыл бұрын

    • Well it's like the stereotypical lamp shade on the head at a party Don't know why that's just like A Thing but it is

      @mikeyaftony2464@mikeyaftony24645 ай бұрын

  • I love how it’s “the thief stole your uncles bed” as though there is just one in the town and this just happens to people.

    @emmitcannady1730@emmitcannady17303 жыл бұрын

    • Ah shet, the local thief stole my toilet again. Perhaps I should move

      @wumbosaurus9121@wumbosaurus91213 жыл бұрын

    • and his family didn't move from the house. The thieft litterally took the bed from under the uncle!

      @mooviies@mooviies3 жыл бұрын

    • i would like this comment but its on 420 so I'll respect you.

      @nicoleangelcourt2862@nicoleangelcourt28623 жыл бұрын

    • @@nicoleangelcourt2862 Dank

      @wumbosaurus9121@wumbosaurus91213 жыл бұрын

    • @@nicoleangelcourt2862 in that 40 minutes it's gone up to 447 though

      @wumbosaurus9121@wumbosaurus91213 жыл бұрын

  • THE WAY THE GUARD SLOWLY WALKED IN, AND WALKED AWAY AND THEN JUST THE GUNSHOT MADE ME CRY LAUGHING OH MY GOD.

    @quantum174@quantum1743 жыл бұрын

    • IT SHOULDN'T BE FUNNY BUT IT WAS REALLY REALLY FUNNY!!!

      @KiwiBubbles@KiwiBubbles Жыл бұрын

    • Time stamp please. Also your papers…

      @NukaChloe76@NukaChloe764 ай бұрын

    • @@NukaChloe769:20 13:10 20:10

      @voodood@voodood4 ай бұрын

    • 'Tis how my great-grandfather dealt with rubbish criminals when he was a border-patrol soldier in WW2. And he was Hungarian btw, so the uniform was also kinda accurate.

      @-WMD-Edutainment@-WMD-EdutainmentАй бұрын

  • After that jumpscare, i think id rather stay as a virgin.

    @w0jak373@w0jak3733 жыл бұрын

    • Same. Saaaaame.

      @CallMeAsty@CallMeAsty3 жыл бұрын

    • Oh man

      @Sega428@Sega4283 жыл бұрын

    • Same

      @Bumbleorc@Bumbleorc3 жыл бұрын

    • I just started the video and I'm looking through the comments and now I'm scared cause you said there's a jumpscare... Fuck

      @bruh-fb7vr@bruh-fb7vr3 жыл бұрын

    • @@bruh-fb7vr the timestamp is 17:23 if you want to skip it

      @maxlondon7723@maxlondon77233 жыл бұрын

  • _"sound the alarm! HE'S GOT A FORK!!"_

    @kittenwispy@kittenwispy3 жыл бұрын

    • *man with Mosin runs out of the shadows and drags the screaming person to their resting place*

      @theinstitute1324@theinstitute13243 жыл бұрын

    • it's still _slightly_ more dangerous than a spoon

      @coolperson9791@coolperson97913 жыл бұрын

    • CALL THE MILITARY, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

      @goblinthetargetpractice6049@goblinthetargetpractice60493 жыл бұрын

    • @@coolperson9791 Wait, a SPOON? OH MY GOD, AHHHHHH

      @goblinthetargetpractice6049@goblinthetargetpractice60493 жыл бұрын

    • If you walked into the airport with a fork I think you'd actually get pulled aside and possibly denied access

      @Darksilver740@Darksilver7403 жыл бұрын

  • Jesus christ the wife in bed gonna give me a heart attack wtf

    @galleo9462@galleo94623 жыл бұрын

    • doing the deed can lead to heart attack, the difference is if you get a jumpscare, pleasure, or AIDs

      @stratecal796@stratecal7963 жыл бұрын

    • I thought that was Lixian's doing

      @lowheadvarney158@lowheadvarney1583 жыл бұрын

    • That jumpscare made me depressed and dead

      @_.Dylan._@_.Dylan._3 жыл бұрын

    • Time stamp?

      @fizzimakes1050@fizzimakes10503 жыл бұрын

    • @@fizzimakes1050 17:24

      @RJ-lr8ir@RJ-lr8ir3 жыл бұрын

  • I'm 5 minutes in and he's going everywhere but the border.

    @Nya0213@Nya02133 жыл бұрын

    • Lol fr

      @urdadlol6213@urdadlol62133 жыл бұрын

  • Mark: Lets a person with a c4 go but kills someone for having a fork

    @benavery58@benavery583 жыл бұрын

  • Boss: “You killed him for a fork?” Mark: “Yeah.....that was my bad.”

    @wizardshark2928@wizardshark29283 жыл бұрын

    • ‍

      @averagecalisthenicsguy1504@averagecalisthenicsguy15043 жыл бұрын

    • Way bee

      @manuamanya6667@manuamanya66673 жыл бұрын

    • Nice profile pic

      @captainkirk4637@captainkirk46373 жыл бұрын

    • When

      @isaacbuiltdifferentRL@isaacbuiltdifferentRL3 жыл бұрын

    • Tbh you would probably get arrested for having a fork on you (and not in your luggage) at most security checks

      @joshualee1685@joshualee16853 жыл бұрын

  • Doesn’t realize how to give papers back and just kills him for having not the right paperwork my god. 😂😂

    @merelymikki@merelymikki3 жыл бұрын

    • Markiplier doesn't know how to do something also Markiplier:SHOOT HIM edit: thanks for the likes

      @ethanvanderjagt5892@ethanvanderjagt58923 жыл бұрын

    • e

      @axethannanth@axethannanth3 жыл бұрын

    • e

      @toshibee1543@toshibee15433 жыл бұрын

    • 666 likes 😳

      @elix7963@elix79633 жыл бұрын

    • A fairly accurate representation of the american legal system.

      @AshlynOne@AshlynOne3 жыл бұрын

  • Mark: *goes to store* Mark: “do you have any bombs?”

    @AESVIII@AESVIII3 жыл бұрын

    • while he is holding an ax

      @wjzav1971@wjzav19713 жыл бұрын

    • Bombs? You want it? It's yours my friend, as long as you have enough rubles

      @x-ray_channel2226@x-ray_channel22263 жыл бұрын

  • Mark: [Rejects paperwork] Citizen: [Right before he gets shot] "Wish I had rejected your mom. You would've never been born." At least he went out a savage.

    @RJ-rp8yd@RJ-rp8yd2 жыл бұрын

    • "You will never had born"

      @sherwinashford@sherwinashford Жыл бұрын

    • ​@@sherwinashford "You will had never born"

      @herbthymeyt@herbthymeyt Жыл бұрын

  • Markiplier: the savage who killed a man because he had a fork.

    @JonahMcD@JonahMcD3 жыл бұрын

    • I’m the 666th like 🙃

      @OnlyiMe645@OnlyiMe6453 жыл бұрын

    • no markimoo was threatened

      @zacharygodwin6328@zacharygodwin63283 жыл бұрын

    • What time?

      @dogedog8686@dogedog86863 жыл бұрын

    • @@dogedog8686 they were looking at him funny. They had it coming

      @zacharygodwin6328@zacharygodwin63283 жыл бұрын

    • @@zacharygodwin6328 Yes, Markimoo is the correct name.

      @dinowattz@dinowattz3 жыл бұрын

  • "Uncle's bed is stolen?!" Doesn't realize he left the front door open, lol

    @bleakautomaton4808@bleakautomaton48083 жыл бұрын

    • Wait, is that actually why it happened?

      @CybernerdShua@CybernerdShua3 жыл бұрын

    • I sleep on the floor in a sleeping bag . Who needs a bed ? That guy is a coward !

      @monikloon69@monikloon693 жыл бұрын

    • Uncle Ben is stolen... poor Ben.

      @CatsMeow_@CatsMeow_3 жыл бұрын

    • Who steals a bed?

      @kcalb4569@kcalb45693 жыл бұрын

    • @@kcalb4569 poor people

      @CatsMeow_@CatsMeow_3 жыл бұрын

  • "A little beer never hurt anyone" Says the man who could die if he drinks alchohol

    @shadow_leaf7965@shadow_leaf79652 жыл бұрын

  • Markiplier: “this is NOT a ripoff of papers please…” Also markiplier: “yeah I played that ripoff earlier this year”

    @Stereo6400@Stereo64002 жыл бұрын

  • “Save your money” Mark: *almost immediately wastes money on a shit stripclub*

    @frecklesandfries9209@frecklesandfries92093 жыл бұрын

    • That weird ass face was worth every dime

      @mwebb8434@mwebb84343 жыл бұрын

    • @@mwebb8434 i t s w o r t h e v e r y p e n n y

      @narnonarno5529@narnonarno55293 жыл бұрын

    • @@narnonarno5529 I t s w o r t h e v e r y f i n g e r

      @mwebb8434@mwebb84343 жыл бұрын

    • @@mwebb8434 you right, you right, I apologize and retract my previous statement.

      @frecklesandfries9209@frecklesandfries92093 жыл бұрын

    • It's all fun and games when so ending until you check your bank account and you have $24 to last you a week

      @crystaltimola9227@crystaltimola92273 жыл бұрын

  • Fork: •exists• Mark: *now this is an avengers level threat*

    @user-zm3bc8ng6m@user-zm3bc8ng6m3 жыл бұрын

    • .

      @user-zm3bc8ng6m@user-zm3bc8ng6m3 жыл бұрын

    • @@user-zm3bc8ng6m I don’t know you...but I like you.

      @danie9507@danie95073 жыл бұрын

    • That's good old Mark

      @crazykids2004@crazykids20042 жыл бұрын

    • Man pulls out box of soap US Airport Security: A terrorist, empty on him

      @krieger8825@krieger88252 жыл бұрын

    • @@danie9507 hm well thank you, I like you too :)

      @user-zm3bc8ng6m@user-zm3bc8ng6m2 жыл бұрын

  • "i guess she had boobs too so that's nice" nice to hear Mark has his priorities in place

    @roxaszy984@roxaszy9843 жыл бұрын

  • 17:26 I actually got jump scared 🤣

    @alyssa2304@alyssa23043 жыл бұрын

  • Mark: “This is too close to home” Game: denying people entry to the country and bringing chocolate and cigarettes home to your wife who ignores you 😂

    @sox9647@sox96473 жыл бұрын

    • @ Pog Pog Pog

      @sorrybrunoigotpurplehazed2232@sorrybrunoigotpurplehazed22323 жыл бұрын

    • @ Pog

      @thepoet6888@thepoet68883 жыл бұрын

    • @ POG

      @janekennedy9985@janekennedy99853 жыл бұрын

    • @ You have started something you won't be able to stop.

      @funtimeLJ6789@funtimeLJ67893 жыл бұрын

    • POG

      @jazzyethecrimefighter@jazzyethecrimefighter3 жыл бұрын

  • Just imagine the people's faces when they see a car out in the field and hearing "OH MY GOD!!!!!" lol

    @SebastianHuxley1776@SebastianHuxley17763 жыл бұрын

    • Joseph Joestar?

      @aaronramshaw7600@aaronramshaw76003 жыл бұрын

    • Love to all

      @EmperorNacht@EmperorNacht3 жыл бұрын

    • @@aaronramshaw7600 i cant unhear him

      @pixeldoll.@pixeldoll.3 жыл бұрын

    • 1.3k likes was unexpected lol thank you kindly

      @SebastianHuxley1776@SebastianHuxley17763 жыл бұрын

    • Game grump reference

      @happiestbread1600@happiestbread16003 жыл бұрын

  • Mark's puzzled face as that officer slowly walks over to arrest the guy made me lose it

    @TheWikkdOne@TheWikkdOne2 жыл бұрын

  • 21:05 Man: Someone who finally does their job properly! 21:06 Mark: *struggles intensely to pick up entry permit and hand it to said man*

    @mesasimonson6612@mesasimonson6612 Жыл бұрын

  • "You're depressed and you're dead" Bruh. One at a time game.

    @DukeofRizz@DukeofRizz3 жыл бұрын

    • You are the rude one here on this comment about Markiplier and just say nice thing to Markiplier, ok, even though Markiplier is real

      @amberator3456@amberator34563 жыл бұрын

    • @@amberator3456 Ok

      @Wan-vo4cr@Wan-vo4cr3 жыл бұрын

    • @@Wan-vo4cr ok of what

      @amberator3456@amberator34563 жыл бұрын

    • @Nugget no I am not high

      @amberator3456@amberator34563 жыл бұрын

    • @Nugget I am not using drugs

      @amberator3456@amberator34563 жыл бұрын

  • “The thief stole your uncle’s bed” So that’s why duolingo taught me how to say “this child stole my table” in Russian!

    @kjartanm.1660@kjartanm.16603 жыл бұрын

    • and here I thought I would never need to use "the watch fell into the wine". Thanks, Duo!

      @TashJansson@TashJansson3 жыл бұрын

    • Fuckers took my table Can't have shit in Russia

      @Roperfield@Roperfield3 жыл бұрын

  • Mark: “papers please.” Me: hesitates for only a moment. Mark: “d e a t h.”

    @user-rw3dq9ww3h@user-rw3dq9ww3h3 жыл бұрын

    • you can just press enter instead of putting a million spaces in your comment

      @PresidentNathan@PresidentNathan3 жыл бұрын

    • @@PresidentNathan ah well I’m not very smart then am I. Thank you for the advice

      @user-rw3dq9ww3h@user-rw3dq9ww3h3 жыл бұрын

  • Random person: *Gets shot* Mark:"Holy sh-" *Queue in Reese's commercial*

    @sukunaego9714@sukunaego97143 жыл бұрын

  • 26:00 it's too real Also this game: "You're uncles bed has been stolen by a thief

    @deqenerate2700@deqenerate27003 жыл бұрын

  • "Border officer" 5 minutes later Strip club with women wearing popcorn buckets.

    @VioletDeathRei@VioletDeathRei3 жыл бұрын

    • l

      @quin.tessential@quin.tessential3 жыл бұрын

    • My dad promised me a new pc if i hit 200 comments on my recent video in 2 days time. Help guys i really need it🥺🥺,,’

      @NAXTY@NAXTY3 жыл бұрын

    • @@NAXTY once again yes I have

      @zefzec4462@zefzec44623 жыл бұрын

    • @@zefzec4462 it's a bot

      @Kai-iy3kk@Kai-iy3kk3 жыл бұрын

    • @Ì Ám ĶèvìñBB1 no thanks

      @Eis7@Eis73 жыл бұрын

  • “Just like my childhood all over again” -Markiplier, who’s apparently Russian

    @parkerglidewell7886@parkerglidewell78863 жыл бұрын

    • Fr what a liar, there wasn't even a butt stone.

      @williammartin9612@williammartin96123 жыл бұрын

    • No... They couldn't afford to be Russian.

      @mirnafairy@mirnafairy3 жыл бұрын

    • Pretty sure he was too poor to even afford citizenship anywhere

      @yozzzeh@yozzzeh3 жыл бұрын

    • @oʇoɥd ǝlıɟoɹd ʎɯ ʞɔılɔ ʇ,uop dude just how-

      @darayoo5677@darayoo56773 жыл бұрын

    • Да это так

      @illuminati1866@illuminati18663 жыл бұрын

  • "you're depressed and you're dead" is gonna be the name of my autobiography

    @arthurjones1991@arthurjones19913 жыл бұрын

  • 19:10 better cars physics than cyberpunk 2076

    @rumplstiltztinkerstein@rumplstiltztinkerstein3 жыл бұрын

    • Fr lol

      @neogaming285@neogaming28511 ай бұрын

  • “Markiplier isn’t real” simulation games almost every day since he came back.

    @mrfranks512@mrfranks5123 жыл бұрын

    • Ikr it’s freaking me out

      @philipbearman6431@philipbearman64313 жыл бұрын

    • I just noticed that!! Also dark is the only real one the only good guy mark is evil hehe

      @sk3tch_art1st35@sk3tch_art1st353 жыл бұрын

    • I was just about to say this thanks!

      @thekingofswing6393@thekingofswing63933 жыл бұрын

    • That's what I said in the Streamer Life Simulator episode! Good to know I'm not the only one.

      @boxoftruffles6217@boxoftruffles62173 жыл бұрын

    • Let him play

      @haxxruz6284@haxxruz62843 жыл бұрын

  • I feel like mark is the only person who would execute someone for owning a fork

    @TheSunShineMann@TheSunShineMann3 жыл бұрын

    • Welcome to mother Russia then.

      @crisgriffin3042@crisgriffin30423 жыл бұрын

    • No i defo would

      @CallMeJameskii@CallMeJameskii3 жыл бұрын

    • I got the impression he thought getting anything on the metal detector was bad, and then he realised when it was too late 😅

      @judestarbabypup@judestarbabypup3 жыл бұрын

    • Markiplier isn't real, it can't hurt you Markiplier:

      @daffa5130@daffa51303 жыл бұрын

    • @@daffa5130 lol yes

      @TheSunShineMann@TheSunShineMann3 жыл бұрын

  • Mark- singing cheerfully **gunshot in background** Mark- continues to cheerfully sing and go home Idk why but it was so funny to just hear that in the distance and him just be like "yeah"

    @w_h_y1112@w_h_y11123 жыл бұрын

    • Thought the same thing

      @nicademousthemage@nicademousthemage2 жыл бұрын

  • Therapist: Soviet markiplier can’t hurt you he is only in one video Soviet markiplier: hello comrade

    @bowenlavalley3297@bowenlavalley32973 жыл бұрын

  • "We were too poor to have a clock" Mark: *Childhood Intensifies*

    @carlyramos7514@carlyramos75143 жыл бұрын

    • Ok

      @stefanandrejevic2570@stefanandrejevic25703 жыл бұрын

    • oh this game is like a blast from the past for Mark 😮

      @UtopssAKAPJ@UtopssAKAPJ3 жыл бұрын

    • Another one added to Marks poor joke compilation

      @OhSoTiredMan@OhSoTiredMan3 жыл бұрын

    • Well... He did say it's too real.

      @richardashendale922@richardashendale9223 жыл бұрын

  • Man: Has fork Mark: And I took that personally

    @kateadams2709@kateadams27093 жыл бұрын

    • fork you

      @GawrGurasBathTubPizza@GawrGurasBathTubPizza3 жыл бұрын

    • they should have went with the spoon is mark a forkist?!?!$?!?

      @meloehaze@meloehaze3 жыл бұрын

    • i hate that i read this in a german accent for no reason

      @bray_1617@bray_16173 жыл бұрын

  • Nobody: Everybody in 2019:"God I wish this year would end already I hate this year." Everybody in 2020: 25:51

    @Ugh718@Ugh7182 жыл бұрын

  • "im not going to be good on my first try but- wha- A THIEF STOLE MY UNCLES BED???"

    @uncommon_name1959@uncommon_name19593 жыл бұрын

  • Mark: "I didn't scan you!" Mark: "It's probably fine." *Woman has a bomb*

    @dedshade@dedshade3 жыл бұрын

    • *o h .*

      @sovietmusiclover857@sovietmusiclover8573 жыл бұрын

    • @@sovietmusiclover857 *n o . . .* I countinued ur scentence.

      @emerald1272@emerald12723 жыл бұрын

    • 21:16

      @thetinypotatobun@thetinypotatobun3 жыл бұрын

    • Also, the woman WAS a bomb

      @suvadeeproy6605@suvadeeproy66053 жыл бұрын

  • Mark: "Border Officer" Also Mark: *goes to the Strip Club*

    @JeweledLove@JeweledLove3 жыл бұрын

    • I'll bring the dollar bills

      @LadyTenjoin@LadyTenjoin3 жыл бұрын

    • That dude Obama, prepaid Caribbean girls

      @chatch621@chatch6213 жыл бұрын

    • გიორგი ფ

      @ritawant2878@ritawant28783 жыл бұрын

    • with an ax *

      @dainswedd9900@dainswedd99003 жыл бұрын

    • @Rita , WANT ВОУ !!! ☹

      @EightySix86.@EightySix86.2 жыл бұрын

  • 17:20 YO WHAT IN THE ACTUAL GREASY DEV SHIT IS THAT??? 🤣🤣🤣

    @magfeed@magfeed3 жыл бұрын

  • "I have happiness bar which is depressing because that means it can go down." Ironic

    @MyName-mz2fu@MyName-mz2fu3 жыл бұрын

  • "this is a fork" "dear god..." "...there's more" "NO !"

    @coins_png@coins_png3 жыл бұрын

    • “It holds the soul of every one in this room”

      @StrangerE0ns@StrangerE0ns3 жыл бұрын

    • it contains a spoon

      @redacted8577@redacted85773 жыл бұрын

    • "Does it say you want the bucket?" "Yes."

      @realCaveJohnson@realCaveJohnson3 жыл бұрын

    • But wait theres more! -Billy Mays

      @Sega428@Sega4283 жыл бұрын

    • lololololololololololololololololololol

      @gavingamer1490@gavingamer14903 жыл бұрын

  • Mark: this game hits too close to home Also Mark: shoots and kills 4 people

    @sipmcihm8107@sipmcihm81073 жыл бұрын

    • He said what he said and meant what he meant

      @Kaunoe@Kaunoe3 жыл бұрын

    • He didn’t stutter

      @thegongoozler5920@thegongoozler59203 жыл бұрын

    • He said it right after he needed more energy in sex so...

      @lawrenceludwigiv7788@lawrenceludwigiv77883 жыл бұрын

  • 17:00 is horrifying

    @EnderalRocks@EnderalRocks2 жыл бұрын

  • 13:13 lol 😂 Mark freaking out over a fork.

    @jasperbruh3954@jasperbruh39542 жыл бұрын

  • Woman: *has C4* Mark: ... Man: *has fork* Mark: and I took that personally

    @jonrinehart6411@jonrinehart64113 жыл бұрын

    • Thank you for your support and that is Markiplier’s fan for the last and final hours of Markiplier channel

      @amberator3456@amberator34563 жыл бұрын

    • @@amberator3456 what

      @watchdog2065@watchdog20653 жыл бұрын

    • @@watchdog2065 Amberator and that is my KZhead channel name

      @amberator3456@amberator34563 жыл бұрын

    • @@watchdog2065 Watchdog

      @amberator3456@amberator34563 жыл бұрын

    • I mean what do you mean about the final hours of his channel

      @watchdog2065@watchdog20653 жыл бұрын

  • Mark: “Just like my childhood all over again” Me: When you were so poor you couldn’t even afford 5 ovens

    @Gabbie.xoxoxo@Gabbie.xoxoxo3 жыл бұрын

    • lmaooo

      @tessa2555@tessa25553 жыл бұрын

    • bruh I read this right when he said that

      @catsquad1784@catsquad17843 жыл бұрын

    • oh hey it's you

      @aedonbokkes8146@aedonbokkes81463 жыл бұрын

    • I AM A MAN, WHO

      @scarcat2469@scarcat24693 жыл бұрын

    • @@scarcat2469 OWNS 5 OVENS.

      @williamlux@williamlux3 жыл бұрын

  • Guy: "Money means everything. You will *have* to learn to save money" Mark: "okay" *10 seconds later* Mark: Strip club! Alright I'll pay the fee! Oo I'll have a beer! Fiine I'll have a second!

    @starmakarma@starmakarma2 жыл бұрын

  • 8:13 my mom heard this and she almost choked on her spaghetti while laughing lol 😂

    @celestialk7148@celestialk71483 жыл бұрын

  • Mark: "Im dumb, im dumb" He says that after the fact when he does a double back flip with his car.

    @spoopyspore173@spoopyspore1733 жыл бұрын

    • I know a guy who could that, haven't seen him in a while.

      @CybernerdShua@CybernerdShua3 жыл бұрын

    • You could use your internal clock Markie. Totally free.

      @videohound2005@videohound20053 жыл бұрын

    • That means he's a genius ?

      @bitfrost3610@bitfrost36103 жыл бұрын

    • Ethan taught him well

      @lvrkins@lvrkins3 жыл бұрын

  • "Get ready to get sqooshed!" Deer: *honey, you've got a big storm comin*

    @blumpet6250@blumpet62503 жыл бұрын

    • *finger guns*

      @ashishsabat9178@ashishsabat91783 жыл бұрын

    • Can I ask you kind of a weird question?

      @theinstitute1324@theinstitute13243 жыл бұрын

    • ​@@theinstitute1324GOD DAMMIT I WISH I SAW THIS COMMENTS EARLIER. BUT YES U CAN

      @blumpet6250@blumpet6250 Жыл бұрын

  • Something surreal watching Mark end his shift so casually while someone is being executed.

    @heartis@heartis2 жыл бұрын

  • 3:00 the idea that Mark says "Not enough thuses" makes me think that he once looked at a contract and amusingly pointed out that there were a large amount of thuses within it.

    @Sketcho20@Sketcho203 жыл бұрын

  • Hero name: Son, His quirk: *Likes chocolate*

    @nosleep9816@nosleep98163 жыл бұрын

    • Mha fan??

      @ash4268@ash42683 жыл бұрын

    • Weeb

      @kzunarii@kzunarii3 жыл бұрын

    • Nice

      @liamyates5716@liamyates57163 жыл бұрын

    • Someone likes mha........ Same here bro

      @Ghost-jw5cz@Ghost-jw5cz3 жыл бұрын

    • Um, mha?

      @kenzie7356@kenzie73563 жыл бұрын

  • “It’s too real” Two seconds before: *not energetic enough*

    @silvertipstudio9622@silvertipstudio96223 жыл бұрын

    • 666 Likes But I am the only one here

      @joshua210808@joshua2108083 жыл бұрын

  • "I have a happiness bar, which is depressing because that means it can go down" I'm 14 and this is deep

    @annualleopard3063@annualleopard30633 жыл бұрын

  • Guy: *has different person on his passport* Mark:"so you have chosen... death."

    @mr.beefyboidoody3539@mr.beefyboidoody35393 жыл бұрын

  • I love how since Mark didn’t know how to hand things to the first person, his solution was to kill them.

    @JonahMcD@JonahMcD3 жыл бұрын

    • I know this is a year old comment but to be fair... Mark did tell him to leave him alone lol

      @xmizutsune@xmizutsune Жыл бұрын

  • I died after the wife jump scare. She's coming for that snu-snu, and doesn't care if her mother watches apparently.

    @kristian4532@kristian45323 жыл бұрын

  • I don't think I've ever cried so much laughing. Finding out she had a bomb and then "it only costs me 5 bucks and I just got 5 bucks" 😂😂

    @Kahunak22@Kahunak222 жыл бұрын

  • Mark: I’m not going to shoot as many people. Also mark with bomb lady: nicely done

    @LaughinLaz@LaughinLaz3 жыл бұрын

  • This is a horrible idea, Mark would just deny everyone entry.

    @PrinceGemJ@PrinceGemJ3 жыл бұрын

    • @HATE Comments GUY I'm not deaf

      @drantigon@drantigon3 жыл бұрын

    • What a true american !

      @nolram@nolram3 жыл бұрын

    • @oʇoɥd ǝlıɟoɹd ʎɯ ʞɔılɔ ʇ,uop how did you turn your comment upise down

      @lazer2414@lazer24143 жыл бұрын

    • @@UltimateGrabber should lose subs for this

      @MrRaven420@MrRaven4203 жыл бұрын

    • Yeah, you'd be better off hiring someone more competent like Wade.

      @Aloyus_Knight@Aloyus_Knight3 жыл бұрын

  • Who ever this game designer is, we need more of their games.

    @818pineapple@818pineapple3 жыл бұрын

    • Is a a shame that this is a rip off, this could be better.

      @ee3171@ee31713 жыл бұрын

    • @@ee3171 true, true

      @818pineapple@818pineapple3 жыл бұрын

    • @@ee3171 rip off of wat game

      @joydelphin4898@joydelphin48983 жыл бұрын

    • At least better quality like gta v

      @SanDiego619RS@SanDiego619RS3 жыл бұрын

    • @@joydelphin4898 Its core gameplay is basically a complete rip off of paper please but worse.

      @ee3171@ee31713 жыл бұрын

  • Mark being utterly heartbroken over the fact that he didn't get laid by his wife will never not be funny

    @DoodlesFool@DoodlesFool Жыл бұрын

  • Mark is equivalent to a 8 year old child, examples are him saying "SKOOSH" or "OOOOOOOOOO" "Can I detect you? WEOWEOWEOWEOWEO"

    @piperlawson56@piperlawson563 жыл бұрын

  • Not only did Mark not satisfy his wife, he never realized he has to physically put food in the fridge and fuel in the stove so his family doesn't starve / freeze to death.

    @DracoHandsome@DracoHandsome3 жыл бұрын

    • Hm, what conundrum he was in, was he not?

      @wibleston@wibleston3 жыл бұрын

    • Tfw you have to sustain a family of literal furniture. No food on fridge? Well star e to death

      @gabrielpineirogarcia2078@gabrielpineirogarcia20783 жыл бұрын

  • “I have a happiness bar. That’s depressing because that means it can go down.”

    @breadmannington@breadmannington3 жыл бұрын

    • Thank you for your support and that you trust in Markiplier

      @amberator3456@amberator34563 жыл бұрын

    • @@amberator3456 Why do you keep writing that under every single comment here?

      @mansurislamov9595@mansurislamov95953 жыл бұрын

    • @@mansurislamov9595 because I wanted to

      @amberator3456@amberator34563 жыл бұрын

    • @@amberator3456 an unreasonable answer

      @mansurislamov9595@mansurislamov95953 жыл бұрын

    • @@amberator3456 you're so annoying smh

      @yazurai4667@yazurai46673 жыл бұрын

  • 0:43 Mark: I have legs. Me who has legs: am I special?

    @bradenduvall6630@bradenduvall66303 жыл бұрын

  • 9:50 Guy got the old yeller treatment

    @giantgoose5429@giantgoose54292 жыл бұрын

  • "Did I get money, why didn't I get money" Casually has 2 men shot and has a person go through border control with a bomb

    @bigdum7274@bigdum72743 жыл бұрын

  • Markiplier: I have a wife, thank you very much Also Mark 5 minutes ago: Hanging out at a strip club

    @Ryutz0@Ryutz03 жыл бұрын

    • Loyalty to the fullest

      @Rev_Nemesis@Rev_Nemesis3 жыл бұрын

  • Few things are more terrifying than Markiplier saying to your face "I could shoot you and it'd only cost me five bucks. And I just got 5 bucks."

    @TheNipSnipper@TheNipSnipper3 жыл бұрын

  • Mark: YOU GOT A WEAPON! Russian man: ITS JUST A FORK MAN I NEED TO EAT!!!

    @erichvonmanstein7084@erichvonmanstein70843 жыл бұрын

  • "I'm wasting all my energy I'm going to give to my whiiiffffeeeee" ~Markiplier, 2021

    @thatdbzguyfr@thatdbzguyfr3 жыл бұрын

    • ‍

      @averagecalisthenicsguy1504@averagecalisthenicsguy15043 жыл бұрын

  • "How was your first day, honey?" "Well, I had two people wrongfully executed, so...okay I guess?"

    @fightscrimewhilesleeping4024@fightscrimewhilesleeping40242 жыл бұрын

  • No Minding Me. Is Just My paarty Axe. 5:34

    @dacarvoid45@dacarvoid453 жыл бұрын

  • Starts game. First words: "I have a happiness bar. That's depressing." Same, Mark.

    @caucaznazn22@caucaznazn223 жыл бұрын

    • I bet if once we have a realtime healthcheck interface build into us we would care more about ourselfs

      @Stubentiger1993@Stubentiger19933 жыл бұрын

    • @@Stubentiger1993 my bars would be all full

      @suffy101@suffy1013 жыл бұрын

    • @@suffy101 mine would be almost empty

      @nathankoh7247@nathankoh72473 жыл бұрын

    • @@Stubentiger1993 my social bar would be low all the time and I would happy about it.

      @toyamwarr@toyamwarr3 жыл бұрын

  • "I have a happiness bar which is depressing because that means it can go down." Markiplier 2021

    @karazsteel@karazsteel3 жыл бұрын

  • The sequence of events leading up to that first guy's untimely death are HILARIOUS. This and the Streamer Simulator are GEMS

    @xxjaykayxx@xxjaykayxx3 жыл бұрын

  • Marki : I'm wasting all my Energy that I'm going to give to my WIFE. Me: It's touch to my inner part. 6:49 ⭐Anyone can feel that way?

    @CarniFlex1@CarniFlex13 жыл бұрын

  • If anything this is like being a security guard still a fun job

    @RD-fv7nn@RD-fv7nn3 жыл бұрын

    • Uncanny Valley was played Jan. 28, 2015.

      @fireyiris9136@fireyiris91363 жыл бұрын

    • We've gathered 5 neighbors to understand what you've wrote

      @StefanST@StefanST3 жыл бұрын

    • @@StefanST He probably meant "If anything, this is like being a security guard (still a fun job)" or he could mean "If this is anythimg like being a security guard it's still a fun job"

      @scptime1188@scptime11883 жыл бұрын

    • It's all fun and games until ur the security guard for a Kid's Pizza Place

      @vinnyosuna7012@vinnyosuna70123 жыл бұрын

    • @@vinnyosuna7012 FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDYS YOOOO

      @black1bank137@black1bank1373 жыл бұрын

  • Mark: "This game is too real".... Stops recording, gets in his car, goes to a rave, has someone executed for smuggling a fork..... NEXT!

    @ZeppyGame@ZeppyGame3 жыл бұрын

    • all while holding an axe in his hand

      @wjzav1971@wjzav19713 жыл бұрын

    • Gets home and picks up his clams outside his house that was delivered yesterday

      @deafgate7473@deafgate74733 жыл бұрын

  • 9:05 My life as a child

    @illomusica@illomusica3 жыл бұрын

  • 7:25 scariest jump scare in gaming history

    @onebilliontacos3405@onebilliontacos34053 жыл бұрын

    • *17:25

      @RJ-rp8yd@RJ-rp8yd2 жыл бұрын

  • I'm a bit surprised he still wanted to get with his wife after that first time...

    @firockfinion3326@firockfinion33263 жыл бұрын

    • Heyyyy you’re a 2 year promoter!

      @deprimentium9892@deprimentium98923 жыл бұрын

    • @@deprimentium9892 Indeed I am!

      @firockfinion3326@firockfinion33263 жыл бұрын

    • @@firockfinion3326 what a legend, he responded

      @hornetisspider@hornetisspider3 жыл бұрын

    • @@hornetisspider Heh, okay.

      @firockfinion3326@firockfinion33263 жыл бұрын

  • mark: doesn't get "sweet tender loving" from wife *literally stands up and screams*

    @juliannamiller6529@juliannamiller65293 жыл бұрын

  • At 14:06 did no one notice the flipped bus??

    @mothinasuit3787@mothinasuit37873 жыл бұрын

  • First day in the new job as a Border Control Agent: -Wastes his money on a strip-club, which he attends with an axe *twice* -Has a guy killed for non-matching picture -Has another guy killed for possessing a fork -Chases a deer with an axe -Gets jumpscared while making love with his wife -Fails to pay his rent -Family dies -Ends up depressed and dead This is why I love watching games played by Mark

    @wjzav1971@wjzav19713 жыл бұрын

  • Imagine if the guy at the DMV talked to you like this . "It would take me $5 to have you killed and I just got $5"

    @PrimeHorizon794@PrimeHorizon7943 жыл бұрын

    • What?

      @alaamhmd1158@alaamhmd1158 Жыл бұрын

  • “Let’s meet in the night ;)” “She denies me...ok, whatever, it’s fine” Yeah, crippling debt and poverty *IS* a bit of a turn off XD

    @dianamaydraw8533@dianamaydraw85333 жыл бұрын

    • Shoot😅

      @solomonbardalez4285@solomonbardalez42853 жыл бұрын

  • One of my favorite parts of any of his videos is watching him rave at the party, straight face, with animated sunglasses 🤣🤣🤣

    @michaelplantarich3375@michaelplantarich33753 жыл бұрын

  • i want to be that DJ, looks like he had life figured out

    @darrianweathington1923@darrianweathington19233 жыл бұрын

  • Markipiler: HE HAS A FORK ARREST HIM! Also mark: Wait forks aren't illegal, s***.

    @Kalcifwa@Kalcifwa3 жыл бұрын
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