Questioning our identity: who are you, really? And why that's important for your future

Who are you, really? And what does that have to do with your life? Your future?
This might be one of the most important questions we can ask ourselves. The trick is to not get stuck on an answer. If you think you've answered it, you've put yourself in a box. You've contained yourself, which might feel safe on the surface. But all containers are, by their nature, limited.
For today's KZhead Live! teaching class at 11:40am, we're looking at who we think we are, and why that's important. Bring a pen and paper to write down answers to some exercises
And, join me Thursday at 11:40am to practice going into the great silence, where you can begin to hear what you really think about yourself . Zoom link here: www.north-scale.com/free-onli...
Over the past few weeks I've been talking about the difference between thoughts and reality. I realized last week that I've gone too far, too fast, and that isn't helpful. So today we'll get into the foundation, and begin to explore our ideas of self, and examine how ideas of self (ie, who I think I am) can seemingly expand us, but ultimately limit us.
Here's what I've found over years of personal examination: looking closely I began to realize the "I" consider myself to be was just a bunch of repeated habits. (And what's worse: I didn't chose most of those habits. They were made by default: repeated responses to others and the world around me).
That's all I am? If so, yikes.* How did I (and many before and after me) come to this conclusion?
Sitting quietly, a long time ago I began to seriously notice my thought patterns. At some point I started focusing on thoughts about myself. As I watched them, I eventually saw how every thought became an action. This was kind of a shock, if I am honest.
Then I noticed that, as I repeated actions enough, they became my habits. Over time, my habits became my character. And, as many wise folks have noticed, your character becomes your destiny:
THOUGHTS = ACTIONS = HABITS = CHARACTER = LIFE
If you examine your current life closely, your present is a direct representation of your past thoughts. If you keep thinking the same, your future will mirror your past. So, if you want to change your future, you need to change your thoughts now.
But how do you change your thoughts? Well, you can't change something you're not aware of, so the first step is to become aware of your thinking. To become aware of your thinking? Just sit quietly and pay attention to your breath, and notice what the mind does to try to distract you from the present moment. What are the stories it tells? The assumptions it makes about you? About others? About the world?
Note: these stories are all from the past. They have a tiny bit of legitimacy, but - as one client so aptly worded it - words (and all our thoughts are made of words) are just a weak proxy for reality. And here's what's really bonkers: we make it all up. You can make any story up, and it will become your life.
Whoa. Think about that for a minute.
Try it. Experiment with your mind. Practice a new thought consistently (ie, purposely stop 3-5 times a day to think one new idea about yourself (for this experiment, keep it to the same new thought each time)) for at least a week, and see what happens. What, if anything, changes? Test it for yourself.
In today's class we'll do things a little differently so that you can begin to actually look within and hear your thoughts and stories about yourself. Bring pen and paper so you can write down what arises for you, and begin to experiment on yourself. It's just an experiment, you can always go back to your old ways and habits. :)
And, on thursday, we'll practice going into the deep quiet and listening to the self, using one of my favorite quotes from Zen Master Dogen to guide us:
"Just forget yourself for now, and practice inwardly"
*That's not all we are. There's so much more, but it's not what you think it is. In next week's class we'll take this exploration further, by using today's foundation to explore Master Dogen's famous teaching: "to study the self is to forget the self."
With big love,
kb