Recovering Honesty After Narcissistic Abuse
In today's video, I explain why the child must not criticize their narcissistic parent. Next, I describe the lengths the child takes to avoid knowing what they do not like about their parent. Most of these involve confusing themselves about who is to blame. They are to blame even when others behave badly. This requires the child to distort how they see themselves and their parent. Life lived on the premise of distortion can feel volatile, confusing, and despairing. The good news is if the survivor can be in new relationships where being critical is welcomed then they can live a life free of distortion. I will explain how.
Knowing the truth about your strength is a critical step in healing from narcissistic abuse.
After watching this video AND if you’re ready to learn more…
Accelerate your recovery journey today by getting a FREE Copy of my ebook, Learn 4 Ways Adult Scapegoat Survivors Can Heal
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Thank you Jay for yet another video that has such relevance to what I’m experiencing & have experienced in my life. I’m 59 yrs old & have for the past 4 yrs been trying to heal. 55 yrs of not knowing that how your feeling (not good enough, your feelings don’t matter) is a long road to go down once you figure out that you were abused your whole life and that’s why you suffer from anxiety & depression. There have been bumps in the road these past 4 yrs but your videos have helped me to get over these bumps & continue on a better road.
Wow that’s spot on Jay, I had to stop it when you said you exist for everyone else but not yourself (or something along those lines). Ghost to yourself, actually had to go off and cry. Don’t do that very often.
I hope you can feel how important you are.❤️
Honest conversation with safe people is healing in itself. Truth has got powerful healing power.
Thank you Jay.
Excellent Dr Jay,
Thank u DrJay.I hated them .I was bullied at school and at home. Talk about keeping my hair short because his thing was to punch in the face, kick in the rips while dragging me by the pony tail across the floor down a full set of stairs .y psychologist said if I complained I'd end up in fostercare and so wouldn't my siblings.. I understand people have stressors but the abuse continued right up the age of forty seven so I waited six years ago to quietly get out from under his foot
Jay, this is more than useful! My God...I'm always taking responsibility for what went wrong and then feeling bad for my emotional reactions/responses. Another light shone in the dark corner of my consciousness. Thank you!🙏🏾
Distortion was my childhood strategy.
"beyond reproach" that's such an issue. No one can relate with someone like that.
Excellent video. I learned a lot from watching and will save and watch again. Also thank you for the ebook. I really appreciate your help.
Most helpful indeed many thanks, brilliant reflections on many scenarios I've been in myself.
This is my mentality! Wow! Thank you sir!
I had been reading on this exact topic! You are right on time! Healing!
Jay, you are a genius. You just summed up my life from 1978 to the present day. You make me feel like I can feel ok again. Thank you. 🙏
Jay! Please let me thank you for this content, hear me out: I've been on this healing rollercoaster about a decade now, and I'm pretty young. It's only possible because of guidance and compassionate perspective like that you provide in your videos here. I mean that. I have a mentor and some friends as support, but to this day, perspective and accurate guidance is CRUCIAL. I found your channel recently, in perfect timing. I appreciate you a lot, Jay - your demeanor, professionalism, compassion, and SHARP intellect are truly gifts. I'm sorry that you understand all of this stuff so well, lol! But really this content is extremely concise & well-presented, and from a highly specific vantage point that I haven't seen expressed more clearly anywhere else online. Jay, THANK YOU for being you and doing this work!
Your work and effort are laudable. Thank you very much¡
I so needed this! Thank you, Jay!
These videos are very meaningful to me after many years of feeling really low and not feeling connected to anyone by my honest choice.
Yes I try not to offend others at my own cost