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SOURCES
McAdams, D. P. (2015). The art and science of personality development. The Guilford Press.
John, O. P., Donahue, E. M., & Kentle, R. L. (1991). Big Five Inventory (BFI) [Database record]. APA PsycTests.
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"A Critique of The Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) - Part Two: a Personal Review". Archived from the original on 2019-08-11. Retrieved 2019-08-11.
Eveleth, Rose. "The Myers-Briggs Personality Test Is Pretty Much Meaningless". Smithsonian. Archived from the original on 2017-02-17. Retrieved 2017-04-12.
Healy, Charles C. (April 1989). "Negative: The MBTI: Not Ready for Routine Use in Counseling". Journal of Counseling & Development. 67 (8): 487-488. doi:10.1002/j.1556-6676.1989.tb02125.x.
Sheldon K. M. (2014). Becoming oneself: the central role of self-concordant goal selection. Personality and social psychology review : an official journal of the Society for Personality and Social Psychology, Inc, 18(4), 349-365. doi.org/10.1177/1088868314538549
Sheldon KM, Kasser T. Coherence and congruence: two aspects of personality integration. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. 1995 Mar;68(3):531-543. DOI: 10.1037//0022-3514.68.3.531. PMID: 7714728.
Thomas, B., Clegg, KA., Holding, A.C. et al. From the Good Life to Good Living: A Longitudinal Study Investigating the Relationship Between Good-Life Coherence and Motivation, Goal Progress and Subjective Well-Being. J Happiness Stud 23, 1887-1900 (2022). doi.org/10.1007/s10902-021-00...
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Yooo
Good opportunity to test brilliant :)
What’s the music that starts playing at the brilliant ad? I ironically really like it haha
My definition of "being yourself", is by being honest towards yourself as that will promote honesty to others. It is not a long and complex definition, it is like saying "just go with it", as in you work with what you are capable with. If you're honest, this shouldn't be no issue to understand and what to do, the complications occur when you set out to make friends or fit in a certain crowd where most of them are a like and you need to make adjustments to be accepted or else you might end up like the neglected odd on out (that also varies on the people). This socialwebpopculture has forever ruined generations after generations making them think and act a certain type of way which is passed off as "cool". I don't want to get technical because that would end up like a small book on the comment section, because there are so many types of personalities but to my very eyes I only see the same 3-4 types. The push to be artificial just to fit in with a certain crowd...
I have personally found that 'be genuine' is a far better phrase. In 'being yourself' lies this assumption that the situation has all ready been experienced and a stance has been formed in congruence with ones perceived identity, but 'being genuine' is more dynamic in nature and can be applied to the reaction to new situations and varying reactions to prior situations.
Thankyou!!!!
Thank you so, so much! This is brilliant
Be authentic
@@rang9245 be sincere
@@douwe8293 ive never googled the definition of sincrere, far better word
Being myself is easy. Being myself without getting fired, divorced, or shunned is the hard part.
Yep, if I become myself I will play GTA on real life and it won't last long.
@@healord51 Okay edgy boi
well maybe beeing urself, means beeing urself infront of urself and not only in front of others :0
I hate when people construe being yourself with being a horrible person, if your "true" self is rude, mean and terrible to be around maybe you have to improve who you are. I'm perfectly fine with being myself, even if it narrows who can be around me, because I like the people who can appreciate me fully and not those who get weirded out by me, you form more meaningful connections, and can easily weed through the fake people in your life. Being yourself is literally just being consistent with who you are, act the way you act at home at school, why hide who you are by being a boring copy of everyone else? I always find people like me more when I'm myself and those who don't were never worth it in the first place. I think the only time you should not be yourself is probably in the workplace or more formal places, but in most social settings, do definitely be yourself.
Exactly, most people don't understand this
It’s 5am and I’m ready to question my existence
i'm ready to question your existence as well
gmt gang
same
yuppp
and what did you conclude?
For me the big break was really just learning to be emotionally honest with people. To tell them I am not in the mood as opposed to making up some excuse as to why I’m not going to the party. To express discomfort or insecurity in a way such that my actions aren’t just out of left field for everyone around me. I don’t really feel a need to hold secrets anymore and as such I’m happier than I’ve ever been in my life
I've stopped being super secretive too. When someone asks me a personal question I pretty much always give an answer. What's hard for me though is in my behavior/how I present to the world. There's still part of me that's "traumatized" from my awkward experiences in school. I think this video is a good reminder to start meditating which I've been meaning to do for a while.
The last few years I've developed in the complete opposite way and feel terrible because of it. I have a constant feeling I need to hide parts of me to others and sometimes even myself. Canceling my attendance of certain events that trigger social anxiety (usually in new environments, I don't get it from going to i.e. a local bar or park) with excuses, getting paranoid of someone checking my social media searches when they borrow my phone or I use their wifi (because they might judge it as cringe, boring, controversial or whatever), not doing things because I might do them wrong, etc. I've kinda had this since my mid-20's but in no way as strong as it has been for the past two years or so. Any advice on which tiny baby steps to take?
@@KarlSnarks Aknowledge your own feelings first. Try to think of why you really feel the way you do and understand what is making you uncomfortable or angry or dissatisfied, then work on accepting those feelings internally and not being ashamed of them when they come up. Once you're comfortable with that, try to find ways you can mitigate and work with those feelings, and ultimately express them to others in a way they can understand you and empathize. A tip for the latter is that you don't need to express every detail to be honest to others. It's fine to say you're simply uncomfortable swimming in public instead of saying you have severe body dysmorphia for example. People will understand, and you're often surprised by the accomodations they will make if you're just honest about what's bothering you. My one concrete tip for you would just be to go to these events and aknowledge to others you have a degree of social anxiety. If you can just own it and accept you'll be a bit akward here and there you'll forget about it fairly quickly. A real life hack here is to just talk about prior akward experiences, the really bad ones you think about while lying in bed at night, it's a real into the flames type of deal, but it's a fantastic way to humble yourself while also letting others get to know you. You can't transform your mind in a day, but it's certainly a way to make it go a lot quicker.
You vill own no secrets, and you vill be happy.
You have to be careful who you tell things to though because not everyone’s in your best interest
Being yourself is way harder than you think, i got a friend who got called names and bullied for purely being himself, which causes him to have a hard time with people and friends, and gonna be an even harder time to find someone who accepts who he truly is
Your friend is literally me
Sounds like he needs some introspection
@@FallingFeeling212 Both sides needs it.
@@FallingFeeling212 lol sounds like he needs to be someone else, maybe someone like you, bc you sound thoughtful and kind /s
@@jackgude3969 There is literally nothing wrong with telling someone they need to look inward and figure out why they are having such a hard time with anything in life including themselves and others. No idea why you had to be such a sarcastic prick but whatever I could honestly care less
Look, when someone says 'be yourself', what they really mean is that they want you to put on a performance of genuine comfort with yourself and interest in the things you like, but in a socially acceptable manner. If you're anxious or disquieted with yourself or in a place where you don't get joy from things- tough, 'be yourself' instead.
You've hit the nail on the head with painfully blunt accuracy...
No, they want you to be comfortable in your own skin and have confidence in yourself and the things you do. Being uncomfortable with yourself can only be solved by building confidence through "being yourself," i.e., being your confident or best self.
@@dropyourself Yeah, the individual person might mean something closer to this instead, but the statement 'be yourself' more often serves to enforce the thing OP said than as a healthy confidence booster when it's just said on its own like that.
@@dropyourselfwould you like someone become you’re worst enemy, just so that they can be themself?
This isn't just blunt, this is blunt force trauma Sadly, very true though
Being onesself is more of a gut feeling imo, you basically know when youre not being yourself just to fit in
fr
It's more than just that, but yeah, that's a really good metric for determining whether or not you're living up to the ideal of sincerity
@@beansworth5694 of course its a bit more than that, but its the simplest way for oneself to check imo
what if part of being oneself for a person is, trying to fit in and doing stuff based on other people's view
@@Burbie we both know its not what its meant by that, otherwise youre always yourself, even on drugs, after torture or whatever else youre influenced by
personally i think “being yourself” is difficult because sometimes who we perceive as ourselves can hold us back from who we really are. in social situations i get in my own head a lot and appear to be really quiet, which i am naturally. but when i associate that “quietness” with being myself i block myself from making conversation because it’s “not who i am”. for me i would say to “be who you really are”. it helps to peel back the layers of made up personality and get to what’s actually me.
Yeah being yourself does not equal don't improve yourself. If you're naturally quiet and want to be more outgoing, work towards it, don't settle on "I'm just a quiet person".
Instead of "be yourself" it should be "be your best self"
@@kelechi_77 Yeah exactly. I was quiet in school (well mostly) and tended to be alone. I don't always like being quiet and honestly some of it was just because I was too worried to talk much. I decided to just try talking to people anyways. While I am still not where I would like to be, I have an easier time talking to strangers now. It does help that people tend to like me, but I don't know what I would have done if that were different.
Buddhism dives into this a bit. Essentially, there is only the present moment and we can choose how we want to be in it. However, because of our internal narratives and patterns, we instead automatically adhere to a role that we're comfortable fitting into. It's possible to change those patterns, but like most growth, there's discomfort in it. What helps me is checking in with my breath and the moment. Then, instead of defaulting to what my "mind" perceives me as, I engage with curiosity and openness.
im like this too. it's complicated because it's useful to know who we are, but when we start to assign an identity to ourselves it can hold us back. ideally we should be spontaneous without tying ourselves to an identity made for us by past experiences, but at the same time act coherently to who we really are. idk it's kinda hard for me to wrap my head around but im slowly figuring it out
The idea that you are pursuing goals to be yourself sounds like a dog who chases his tail and enjoys it. Really great video.
good comparison!
One must imagine Spot to be a good boy
And never catches it
this is the perfect example of mindfulness
All roads lead back to the one Sisyphus is on
This guys taste in jazz is unmatched
babe wakeup sisyphus just dropped new existential crisis.
Being yourself is good advice as long as you are not lazy, socially awkward, out of shape, boring, inexperienced, addicted, passive, indecisive, overly sensitive, depressed person. The problem is everytime I was myself, I would waste time scrolling the internet and social media especially KZhead, not look for a job, practice coding, not work out, stay up late, neglect my hygiene, avoid meditating. When your whole life is a mess, being yourself is basically remain stuck in a rut and self destruct.
Lol I'm all of those except depressed. I was depressed for awhile, but I've come to enjoy the pleasures of life more than just momentarily. Although i do wanna improve myself, the way i am right now ive accepted is ok too.
@@daredevil2724 How did you accept your situation?
@@siddharthkrishna7249 lots and lots of meditating. Remembering that life has dealt me the hand im dealt and it is what it is. A lot of people have it worse and i have a lot of things to be grateful for. Also, the victim mentality only makes things worse.
I literally, physically and mentally, find so much comfort from your videos. You make complicated subjects (not just philosophies) look so much simpler to understand. You made me understand more about myself, and the world around me. Bro, I hope you know that you’re amazing, underrated and the coolest person ever.
Wholesome AF.
Yeah life isn’t complicated and anxiety makes life feel complex. This video is great.
I think better way of saying it is "be honest". Don't hide behind a mask. Be natural. If a person doesn't like you that way you shouldn't commune with them in the first place.
personally ive just abandoned the idea of boiling down people to simple terms, you certainly can spot some recurring themes in peoples behavior. But this thing about categorizing and labeling everything is an illogical want we have as humans. I think the truth is that not everything can be labeled and simply accept it as it is.
Everything *can* be labeled, but be aware that you're only able to usefully and accurately apply labels to a moment of relational occurrence rather than the whole of the thing in all of its complexity. The drive to conceive of labels is only as useful and rational as its application in use, and that oftentimes comes down to communication. Acceptance of things as-is before making an effort to identify and/or change them is a necessary perquisite, but it doesn't actually have to be the endgame as I see it
I get hurt a lot day to day. I don't choose it, and sometimes I try to be myself, but myself isn't the healthiest ya know.
Interesting to see research backing what I have been slowly empirically noticing lately. I usually break down this "jUsT bE YoUrSeLF!" advice into two more complex to explain ones. 1 - Have a designed intent behind everything you do and be conscient of it at all times 2 - Have sound internal integrity between what you value and your designed intents (that translates to actions)
Love this !
I think eventually it boils down to taking a hard stare at oneself and deciding what they wish to achieve in the long-term and in the short-term depending on the circumstances and aligning their actions and motivations with their pursuit. But because we spend majority of our time and lives in the pursuit, making that conquest worthwhile and satisfying is where one's happiness and fulfilment lies.
What “Be Yourself” means to me, is “Just be naturally what you are”. Don’t try to force yourself to be something else just to get others to accept you or get their approval. I have noticed that just being myself is enough and I’ve met some pretty cool people along the way
Society: just be yourself! Me: tries to be myself Society: no not like that!
There's definitely still something here to be said about the fear of the self... The fear of confronting the sometimes ugly truths of ourselves, the shadow. Finding, expressing, and accepting this so called self is certainly a journey!
Oftentimes there isn't even anything harmful about a certain part of one's self, but allowing others to know about it opens one up to a potentially greater opportunity of rejection.
@@thederpydude2088i think there definitely are certain harmful aspects of one's self that are distructive to both oneself and people around us. Doesn't means that these "harmful aspects" are our shadow, it can as well be part of our ego(you certainly see a lot of people that are just rude and distructive). But the way to deal with them is to come at terms with them and not to fight with it. If you fight it, you only push it in a corner. And you can only push it till you have power, the moment you loose power due to some reason, it will come to bite back
I think its also important to note that yourself can change and thats ok. Sometimes i find myself holding back on things I want to do or falling back into old bad habits because i feel like thats “who I am”. But no! We can all grow, the self is always changing!
i didnt understand shit, but the drawings have a style that I always loved. This video also helped with procastinating the writing of my bachelors exam, soooo...
Don't put it off too much. I made that mistake for a 50 page paper lol.
same everything went above my head
I legit woke up at 6am to get ready for a dissertation defense followed immediately by a job interview and this dropped like 2 hours before the meeting. Synchronicity is becoming a more and more likely phenomenon
It is just coincidence. Do you think his whole life was designed or 'divinely guided' so that he would post it exactly 2 hours before your meeting, for you personally? People tend to see the world only from their perspective and revolving around oneself. Don't try to fill in cause and effect. We cannot comprehend cause and effect at such large scales. Anyways, good luck with your defense and interview!
It's more so that our current circumstances shape our salience landscape more than you know, so relevant things and striking coincidences come to your awareness more readily. Synchronicity is a highlighter, not a pen.
sorry to disappoint but its likely just cognitive bias
@@ThiemenDoppenbergyeah yeah luck is a purely psychological phenomenon that is out of your complete control so why rely on it. But if he feels lucky let him my guy
Self worth = being who who think you are/should be Self love = discovering who you be and loving that
Nah this is crazy... last night I was like "I wish Sisyphus 55 would drop another video soon" wake up this morning to a new video. Bro never misses ngl.
This "call" is hypocrisy, the society at large don't want to be your true self it wants you to be a good little cog in the system.
It really depends on where you live. In Asian countries, you'll be correct almost all the time. I don't know many places but I'm pretty sure Melbourne is pretty lax on societal standards.
@@sg5sd Yeah, this "call" is really reserved to certain white-skinned western countries and even then limited to certain wealth class.
@@sg5sdno they just have different societal standards
“just be yourself” is something way deeper. dmt will show you the meaning of it
I think a really cool thing you learned is that people do know themselves more than you give them credit for. That is very true. People so often tend to think that they know others than those people know about themselves but when people talk about their experiences, when you look at it through their perspective, what they say actually makes a lot of sense. When making judgements on how others’ feel, what the person says is very often true.
Being my self would flash out anger at most of the people I meet after that flare cooled down I would come down but first I would attack him/her/it.
Becoming yourself is pretty simple if you ask me. It means to peel away the toxic layers from your ego, I'm not implying you should abandon your ego, I'm just saying you should part ways with the behaviours of which you know does not provide any "good" to you or the world (with "good" I assume you have a considerable developed conscience to objectively determine what is useful and what is not). As you keep doing this, you'll find you become lighter, quicker and clearer in mind, your life becomes more and more about growing towards; doing what you're good at, doing what you enjoy, doing what gives you purpose, and (if you need to) being willed to sacrifice for those desires. Basically, all of this requires you to be not afraid to grow, or to be not afraid of discomfort. I'm not saying comfort is bad, I'm just saying who ever you are, if you stay in your safe cocoon for too long, you'll stagnate. Stagnation is not natural. Look at life, nature, the galaxy, everything around you is constantly evolving. Children are constantly discovering. Your body may grow older but the power within yourself never decays. Yet, when we grow older we tend to become more rigid. This rigidity (in my opinion) is turning yourself against yourself, or turning yourself against nature. Anxiety, addiction, ignorance, arrogance, insecurity, denial, hatred, information overload, too much stress (or over working), or lack of responsibility and stress (procrastination and laziness), etc. ~Deep down we all know what's good for us and what is not, we all deal with one (or more) of these issues, yet we keep running in cycles, because in the moment, the wrong choices seem more appealing than the right ones, which are ugly and uncomfortable, but of which we know will eventually set us free. I believe that if we want to understand ourselves better for who we are, specifically understanding our personal problems, than it's a better option to ask how do I solve this than to ask why am I the way I am, or why do I do this. Because, you see, 9 out of 10 times if you first answer the how (through taking considerable action) the why will float to the surface automatically... Being yourself means to constantly become a better version of who you already are, just by shifting your focus on what helps you and the one's that are dear to you. Of course you will make all the wrong choices, of course you will experience discomfort, and of course you will fall ten thousand times, but each time when you stand up again and take a new step in the right direction you are actually taking a step closer towards who you really are, when you struggle, when you find joy, when you persevere and when you truly experience, THAT is when to real you is enfolding itself, the you who is unconditionally loving and without any inhibition. The you who is devoted to grow, devoted to do what is necessary, devoted to do what is right, devoted to make your dreams come true, (and if necessary) devoted to suffer, that is the you who is simply devoted to live life! Devoted to be a present for the present. If you do your best in whatever it is that you're doing and TRUST the process, then your authenticity will come to the surface naturally... It doesn't need to be complicated, it just has to be honest and sincere.
Being ”yourself” is pretty difficult, if you’d take into consideration that every person are who they are because of the people around them.
mindfulness therapy taught me that we instinctively know who we are and what we want by default when we are born and as we get older, everything we begin to learn distracts us from being our 'true selves'. The hard part is un-learning the false stories we believe about ourselves and the world and once again aligning our decisions and beliefs with what we've always known to feel right to us
The advice I’ve learned to give is “don’t be anything you’re not”. It’s hard to know exactly who you are, but you can tell when you are trying to act richer, colder, funnier, etc.
“Yourself” as suggested by society = fitting into accepted social norms and never deviating Your actual self = who you really are inside and how you would act if there were no social rules. Too much societal “self” and you fall into the category of average or below and never stand out. Too much “actual self” and you are labeled weird, uncaring, or psychopathic. The most respected, admired, and successful perfectly blend their “actual self” with “societal self”
One of the biggest things (at least in my experience) is to be more honest with people. And sometimes even brutally honest. I've had times where I've had to tell people to their face "I'm not comfortable hanging out with you" and that's just how it is. Because if you don't say it, then you'll be uncomfortable every time you and the other person hang out and the other person won't know what's going on. It can be true for positive situations too! Letting people know that you love them or that you enjoyed hanging out can make their day. Not only that, but just being honest in general is a great way to figure out what you like and don't like. And that's how it shows what kind of person you truly are.
I'd love to hear your story of telling someone you don't wanna be around them. 😂 I've had to do it and had it done to me. It's necessary for both parties.
Yeah it's not always great to be honest to people, especially if it turns out the worst when you are.
Sometimes being yourself is not enough. Sometimes you have to become yourself.
It's crazy that after a few events over the past few years have got me thinking these exact questions; from what do i want and how I want to be to that "well who am I, recognizing that the world is inherently an uncaring place and I could potentially not meet any of my goals" and then watching this video makes me reflect on some of that and in a way helps restrengthen these thoughts I had as me not overthinking (or overthinking in the right direction) I guess I just appreciate this channel so much ever since I found it and the work and research you put in these videos helps me have a better understanding of myself and my own existential thought processes I have wayy too much.
I have no idea what I'd say if someone asked me to describe who i am
Same. Or at least I wouldn't be honest with them. I think that nearly every aspect of "me" is performative, every interest, hobby or routine simply employed to be perceived better with the goal being admiration. The only things I enjoy that aren't related to that are getting off sexually, eating, the appearance of the world around me, certain smells, certain sounds. All sensory, anything related to personality is a stressor for me. Obviously I can't tell anyone in my real life much of this. Only writing this all out here because it isn't something I've really thought out so simply before, documenting it and hoping that someone gives attention for it. Ha ha ha, so meta.
I have this shitty thing where as soon as I lose my main interest, being a friendgroup, specific topic or hobby, I get really depressed. The more things I surround myself with, the less down I feel. The more down I feel, the harder it is to surround myself with distractions. Kinda funny that this whole internal crisis is a weird evolution glitch lmao
Awesome stuff, man. Your animation keeps improving too! The stick figures are gaining some more elaborate movesets and I'm loving it!
“Just be yourself” might be the worst set of advice ever written in history
You left me questioning everything as the beautiful jazz melody played in the end, I guess identity has been a problem for a long time, I have always been confused on who I am, lost, but I am at comfort with whatever being I am now, a favourite line from a great anime, "whatever happens, happens"
"But I still don't understand myself, I don't even know what make me myself. How can I love myself?"
I really enjoy this channel. You’ve helped me understand so much about myself and other people. I’m thankful.
There's a great song by german duo BRUCKNER called ''Wer wir sind'' talking about how everyone tells you to just be yourself, but everybody means someone else with that statement.
ok im begging you to drop this in essay format. i want to carry this around.
When I was a teen, back in the 1980s, I got the notion that the teenage years are a time to learn about oneself, who we are and, sometimes unfortunately, who we are not. As I got older, I started to suspect that most people don't do this, or maybe they do it a bit in college, if they get to college. A lot of people seem to live on auto pilot, chasing after material thigs others have told them they want. The true 'rat race' in my very humble opinion. I also think we are all subject to society's influences as well as commercial marketing. None of us could ever become a fulile bustule of pworging mystacial, because that does not exist in our reality. It's not a choice we can make or a thing we can want. It's amusing to me that so many people who advise us to "Be Yourself" will also ask us, "Why are you like that?!?" when we follow their 'advice' ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I find it helps to have a sense of humor and not to take myself, or anyone else, too seriously
Asking someone to be themselves is like asking them to be someone they don't know, someone they might never meet. All people can do is do what they think will make them happy, and eventually, most will be, looking for the next goal. And maybe, one day, they'll be someone else.
I agree with the first statement, but for a very different reason than your second one. People can learn to understand themselves as they live their lives, although it is indeed a moving target the issue still can't purely be summarized as "humans are devices that just seek avenues of pleasure with no substance other than that".
@@beansworth5694 Oh no, ofc there's more to a being but its a comment, not an essay ;)
Your videos sometimes feel like a message indirectly from God. Timing feels so convenient to the fluctuations in my mind. When i feel like im swerving off the path, your videos sway me back into the correct direction.
Thank you so freaking much for this! I cant properly explain how much I needed this, probably gonna watch this a bunch of times!
Also, thanks for the good music suggestions 🙏
my self is fundamentally flawed and there is no possibility of recovering from the state i am in and have been in all i deserve is unalive
have you considered looking into therapy? reading your comment reminded me how i used to think about myself and therapy has helped me a ton so maybe itll help you
@@drew2dee2 Therapy is not meant to help you directly with problems. It is intended as a vent. My therapist could not provide me with any assistance in problems that were afflicting me.
@@therealdocThat is not true. The primary purpose of most therapy is to help you best navigate your problems, even if your therapist cannot help fix your problems directly. Part of it is typically to vent emotion, but there’s a lot more past that which it seems you are not knowledgeable of due to inexperience or bad experiences.
@@Zephyr_Uhh It seems you're not knowledgeable of it either considering you can't provide literally any examples beyond the primary function of therapy.
@@therealdoc You didn't ask, so you can't expect to get that from me. It's also fallacious to assume I can't given you not asking and the fact that my reply to you was rather limited in its scope. I'm plenty knowledgeable, I've gone to therapists and psychology is an interest of mine. I'll explain further. While therapists cannot (generally) make decisions for you, they very often talk through various problems and difficulties with clients to help them figure out what they want to do. For mentally ill people it can sometimes be exceedingly difficult to think with a clear head, and having a well intentioned perspective that cannot legally leverage anything against you can allow you to open up and get an outside view on things which you may be facing alone. Say someone has a bad habit relating to something embarrassing or morally acceptable but socially rejected, that they frequently do. Most people aren't going to have someone they can confidently and safely open up to, and that can lead to cycles of bad habits and mental isolation regarding that topic. Just a little outside input can broaden a person's perspective to prevent those internal cycles from consuming a person. Another example would be helping to form connections. Many people who go to therapy are young and isolated from society at large whether that be due to mental illness or typical social rejection. A therapist can help a person to broaden their horizons to things which they wouldn't have considered otherwise. Some people will get it in their head that there are things that people like them can't do or aren't for, but a therapist can break up a harmful internal status quo in order to find new avenues of life for a person.
Most of the time being myself involves emotional outpouring followed by a long awkward silence
I feel seen. I've been trying to do this stuff for a while now and a friend recommended this video to me. I also feel less alone knowing that this isn't just something I'm going through, especially when so many people are interested in this very well-made video. Thank you.
“Just be yourself” is a bit of an experience for me cause im trans, being myself is hard, i know who i am im a guy, but what kind? Am i really? Or do i just like being *called* as one? And if i when i am “being myself” i feel left out since, i when i be myself it’s either im annoying or I’m entirely silent,and im scared of what people think of me, i dont want them to fear me, but being me kinda results in that
Whenever I tried to be my authentic self people end up disrespecting me
I’m glad that I’m finally starting to be able to understand your videos and apply them to my life, thanks for all the help.
Definitely going to need to watch this again. Badass topic & whoever decided to put numbers/logic/plot to it all was looking for the key! The difficult part I’m trying to contemplate is maneuvering through a social life while following these concepts. There is so much interplay & a TON of self-discipline that would allow someone to be themselves. This almost defies being social? I think losing the self in the right moments would be the way to allow for the universe to give you the right path? Idk sweet content man, thank you a lot 🧠
To truly be yourself, you have to trust yourself, and that is a exceedingly rare thing in people.
I have wondered to myself whether the self is something that's innately inside of me, or something I'm supposed to build.
Thank you, you have reminded me of who I am. Who I really am, I struggle remembering it, because it's not something you can expect of others to tell you "Remember who you are", I've only heard/read this sentence when someone unintentionally puts an expectation on you that is not you, but a you that they perceive and know as. Of course, sometimes, even the people you're closest to, seem to know who you are, because they have been observing you, but even then, they don't know you, the way you know yourself, because they themselves are struggling with knowing who they are. Thank you for reminding me. 😊
I'd rather become myself, but for that I'd have to fight the system
Why do you always make videos at seemingly the right time? It always catches me in the right headspace and it's always about something that's been weighing on my mind a lot. You're like the philosophical version of Taylor Swift.
Are you saying Taylor isn’t philosophical????????????
Honestly I think its far better advice to say "Do something everyday that getsvyou just a little bit closer to the person you want to be" Because sometimes who we are can hinder us. Alot of aspects of ourselves keeo us from reaching out full potential. But thinking about who you mwat to be amd how you would get closer to who that person is. That motivates and inspired you and makes you think about how your identity was formed and was to construct a newer healthier one
Just got told that the person who you confessed to that rejected you because they weren’t ready for a relationship is now going out with your mutual friend gang!
Thanks for citing the papers you looked at! Which one mentions that personality changes over time because that's really cool
This question has always bothered me, because how much agency do you really have to “be yourself?” It’s been demonstrated countless times that people are a product of their upbringing. Those who grow up in abusive households tend to be abusers themselves, while people who grow up under narcissistic parents tend to be narcissists. It seems our identity is owed extensively to the environment that surrounds our development. And sure, perhaps people can force themselves to change for the better, but isn’t this just conforming to what society wants, too? What if your identity is one that other people despise? Should you even try to “be yourself?” Just a thought.
You're forgetting that our upbringing is only 50% of who we are. The rest is genetics.
The problem is is everyone was themself it’d be like middle school. Innapropriate jokes, naruto running through the office, it’d be great but chaos
The proposition seems mute if the recipient has free will. Sometimes you just need to stick your head in sand for long enough to declare yourself outside while the grains pour into your craneal orifices.
I was extremely revolted with life as I was a teen because of depression. I would act without having others into consideration. I lost my girlfriend and looking back I was the worst possible person for her while she was the best person I could ever asked for. The regret will never leave and I will always be trying to make myself a better person without ever accomplishing happiness doing so
Who has time for goals, when they spend all there time at work, decompressing from work and sleeping.
That's why I like that raja/ashtanga yoga differentiates between purusa and citta (ahamkara especially). It dispenses with much of this
First / still processing gang
13 hrs ago even tho the vid released 5 seconds ago?
@@MilanoBrandwainprivate video
@@phando3729 oh makes sense
WOW, what a great wideo, not regurgitated content but rly some new words, and concepts that non psych majors can get into ! I am greatful
When i am myself i become on the verge of institutionalisation and no career path lol
Glad your advertised! You deserve to be paid for this and you do it in an almost perfect intermission form. Makes me happy to see an ad ngl
The balance between self examination and self obsession is tricky to manage. Although, growing up gay in the late 70's and early 80, I was forced into a lot of introspection that others didn't need to engage with just to survive, I would say that the process of knowing or at least accepting the self is a much longer term process and the demands of a busy life leave little time for what the community at large sees as self indulgence. As retirement approached and widowhood was thrust upon me, wave after wave of self realization came over me. Growth is a lifelong thing if we let it be and I am glad I allowed this process to continue into old age because it has helped me to deal with all manner of social dynamics with confidence, whether outcomes were positive or negative instead of socially normative responses that do not fit. I am, at heart a cynic.
Every time someone tells me to “be myself”,all I hear is that they want me to be a psychotic,troubled person with no sense of self preservation. I’m actively going out of my way to NOT be myself,and you’re basically trying to enable me
uh, I wouldn't go that far, dude. maybe SOME people who say that actually want to help but don't know how. it's a standard response, honestly. It's just something you say and THINK it has a nice meaning to it, ya know?
I always thought of "be yourself" to be about "not trying to be something you're not" This solves the issue of taking "be yourself" to face value, and unapologetically being yourself when it isn't necessary and/or extreme.
*sigh* another damn Sisyphus video. I couldn’t be happier
I feel like the best example of me not being myself is that there are many people who know different versions of me. In reality I feel like all those personas should show in every expression of myself
Great vid! 'Be yourself' There are so much behind this sentence...
being yourself is to find yourself first
I really enjoy listening to these over lunch
Watching yourself is always simultaneously a complete mindfuck and extremely insightful. Thanks for these videos!
the problem with being told "be yourself" is that i have no idea who i fucking am. what are my traits? whats my personality? i dont know anything.
Start trying to figure out what you value write down 5 things and start from there
You'll always be yourself no matter what
Chris Chan and dawillstanator are case studies of what people who follow the be yourself message
Dude no! Being myself has hurt so many people. 1st day of therapy on the 24th 🎉
I love you Sisyphus55 😫 Your videos are always calming me and offers me better ways to perceive things in my biggest existential questionings 😌
6:23 Smoothly animated shot
i stg the same people who yell "just be yourself" have literally the most generic personalities to ever exist (or at least out of all the people like that ive had the displeasure of meeting)
thats exactly why they give that kind of advice imo them being themselves is inoffensive and generic as it can be
Either theyre generic as hell, or theyre just projecting their own lack of “being yourself” onto others in hopes that saying it out loud will magically make them act genuinely. This is why I HATED mental health support groups in high school. It was all just a self-congratulatory system to feel like they were helping while doing none of the work to improve the school environment
I have been wondering how to word this for a conversation with my friends. "Self enlightenment" As external validation is only really a social construct based off of drama, idealism, and other ideologies. I believe that for some people true self expression or self enlightenment, comes from time and learning to find validation internally. As you are the only person in your head at the end of the day, at least you can use the resources around you to help yourself and others. "Life sucks and then you die; you might as well make the best of it" “Truth is not what you want it to be; It is what it is and you must bend to its power or live a lie.”
You're like a sane Exurb1a
Gen Z has been robbed off the liberty of being yourself, due to the advent of cringe culture, anything deemed "weird" or outside of the status quo now gets you ostracized and it's always been like that, unique people get shunned, and no one wants to be an outcast, yes being genuine and authentic is not a glamorous life, society is built on fantasies and false promises but we all have to learn to move past that and express ourselves in a genuine form because the benefits are that you'll attract people like you and who will connect with you in a more deeper level, than playing into a façade for people who don't even like you.
You are definitely playing into this. Also this is just a lack of confidence, which takes time to build up.
@@dropyourself how am i playing into it?
except now Gen Z hypes up weirdness and uniqueness online but IRL its a different story. I'm talking about those people who record others minding their own business to laugh at them like. ofc no one in this generation can comfortably be themselves. We got the fuckin conformity police all around waiting for an opportunity to take you down a peg
@@piroshk1968 THIS
Adding low self concept clarity to the list of things making me sad lmaooo
My intrusive thoughts: Am I a narcissistic impulsive anxious idiot? Internet: Always have been.
What we like isn't necessarily what we want.