The Terrible Paradox of Self-Awareness | Fernando Pessoa
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In this video, we explore a mysterious yet beautiful work of literature produced by one of the most interesting writers of the twentieth century: The Book of Disquiet by Fernando Pessoa. The story of the book itself is perhaps as unsettling as its contents.
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Can we get the music you use below the patreon? It would be nice to listen to sometime.
When u pay enough attention to the pattern of human behavior, you're seen as a prophet.
@@xyandi4870 2:57
@@xyandi4870 good morning babe
I’m gonna have my dad 🧑 bring 😊😊
The worst thing about self awareness is it takes away the bliss of ignorance. I am almost jealous of people who just live and not think much.
This. 💯 agree.
Meditation can help a bit. It helps me get to sleep when my thoughts are too much.
This is the hardest thing ever, Why my brain can't stop thinking of something.. the same here
"For an abundance of wisdom brings an abundance of frustration, So that whoever increases knowledge increases pain" - King Solomon
Funny how there is just some lines from Pessoa that says something like that: "Vivi, estudei, amei e até cri, E hoje não há mendigo que eu não inveje só por não ser eu." Tabacaria
"Every deep thinker is more afraid of being understood than of being misunderstood." - Friedrich Nietzsche
plz explain this?
@@HighestMonarchy I assume that being understood implies that there is a chance that you are not mad, because somebody else sees the same thing you do. And if you are not mad, perhaps all of your hopeless fears about mankind are true and real.
@@vr1630 But that's not you, that's just your perception, at a certain stage of your life. I'm sure you didn't think anything was hopeless when you were a kid. If that's the real quote and message behind it, then Nietzsche didn't put it into words too well.
Only if they don’t know where they are ! You fear being misunderstood if you have something worth saying
True understanding is brought about by divine grace and exists independent of thought
Being self aware is weird. I both know who I am and have no clue who I am. I’m both the narrator and main character of my own life, and I spend a great deal of my time analyzing myself from the 3rd person. Every word I say, every movement I make, and even every thought I think has been carefully curated to create a ‘character’ of me. I know everything about myself, so it feels like I know nothing about myself. I have no idea whether my feelings are real or whether I fabricated them in order to fit my artificial identity. Even the most ‘raw’ parts of my emotion are intentionally raw, and it’s caused me to feel absolutely horrible, knowing that even my truest self might not actually be my truest self, and is just what I create my truest self to look like. I don’t feel human.
I understand the feeling of not feeling human or feeling your emotions might be fake. I'm not on the level to analize myself all the time but it's sound hearthbreaking if you ever need a friend that you can talk about anything I will be here.
Just relax
this this this.
@@ExtremeDeathcoreCoversif only
@@blessedisyou there's nothing and no one that can help. Because there's the eerie feeling that everything that am looking for is just right here but never to have courage or time or continuity to look into and past it. It's like being observer of this entire observing... Because as soon as there is an observer, I create another something that I now need to worry. Human if any and for any surety if any would be to accept everything and relax. Abandoning the search would be the meaning probably. Forgetting the question. But again, can it be done ...
Seems that if you ask yourself a question for long enough, the answer no longer matters.
The question no longer matters as well.
That’s as deep as you want it to be bro. Insightful
Nothing matters
The questions you have are created by the answers you already have.
The answer is the question
Perhaps the most comforting thing about delving into this level of the human experience is knowing there are a few other humans who dared to think as far as you did, and they feel the terror, beauty, and absurdity of it all just as much as you do.
Aw I love this comment.
Kai Buchan.. yes truely beautiful insightful comment Wow
Yes that's true, and really shows that what we think is unique is in fact not so original after all.
Like Franz Kafka.
@@arcacoma3524 Considering 100+ billion humans have lived and died, I would wager it all on that being true.
I get so caught up in self-awareness that I haven’t done anything at all in life. I’ve been hyper focused on my every move and breath for half my life only to realize I never looked at the bigger picture. I’m so isolated and constantly overwhelmed and it’s all my own doing. I understood every word of this video, I can’t imagine living a life not thinking this way.
do you feel every single decision you make or every word you say everything you do is wrong , then you think doing it in opposite way then that seem to be wrong and end up remain silent or do nothing like you are a ghost ? I feel this way all the time and feel the same way you feel
It is a blessing and a curse. On one hand I feel wiser than everyone around me from having the level of understanding of reality that extreme self awarness brings about. But on the other hand knowing how the world truly works and how absolutely insane everything is makes you always discontent with the world and people. Its incredibly lonely
@@bue7884 we dont know how the world "truly works" and to claim you do, is pretentious and narcissistic
Get a grip
I’ve had this same issue for the longest time, and all along I thought I was being “self-aware” for criticizing myself for every action I make, and over-analyzing just about everything in life. But what this is really called is excessive introspection. It is NOT self awareness and in reality prevents you from understanding yourself. I highly recommend finding an article online to read about it.
You know a video is beyond exceptional when the comment section isn’t filled with compliments and praise but people philosophising about life. Bravo!
I'm from Portugal, and in school it was mandatory to study Fernando Pessoa. I hated it so much. I think he'd hate it as well. Fernando Pessoa, just like most great writers, you find them in the time of your life you need them the most.
Agreed, I also had to study him and, despite actually showing some interest in his writings, I didn't really pay much attention (I was more of a fan of epic literature and plays like the works of Camões). Now that I'm an adult studying history in college, I regard Pessoa in a different way, because I've lost the "innocence" and "blindness" of youth, just like how he mentioned. I find great solace in his writings because it truly displays the sacrifice and gruesome reality that is being *aware,* how people distract themselves because if they dwelve into the depths of reality they begin to go insane or potentially hopeless, and Pessoa accepted his fate.
I agree with you. Then again, what if Pessoa weren't mentioned in school in Portugal? People would be outraged - and rightly so. What most education or pedagogy gets wrong, it seems to me, is that it approaches subjects - especially the metaphysical ones such as literature - like the hard sciences, to be understood objectively, and so students can't relate to it when it is rendered bloodless, soulless. And this approach is indifferent to the subjectivity that the most sensitive students - ironically those drawn to the arts in the first place - bring to the classroom and need validated by the teachers, especially when dealing with writers such as Pessoa. Of course Pessoa's writing will seem boring if the pedagogy used to "study" it is like teaching algebra or physics or is presented as the great national treasure one must bow before. In the US, our national treasures included Hawthorne and Thoreau and Poe (as I recall) and at the time, I could only relate to Poe. I discovered Pessoa in my 30s and it was a similar experience as when I discovered Kafka at 18. Mind blowing. I still love reading Pessoa - or whatever heteronym he uses, they are all brilliant. As a fan of fado, I was glad to hear that some of Pessoa's poetry is used in some song lyrics, including Mariza's Poetas.
Greetings from Bulgaria, man. Pessoa is the greatest poet for me! Found it willingly and at the right time maybe ;) I love how he hates adding human emotions to clouds, rain, sun and mountains and so on. The sky just CANNOT be sad! :) He draws the line below so many poets go trying to be "expressive". Love him! Cheers. And love to all Portugal. Favourite country :) Europe! :)
Pessoa é produto de Sá Carneiro.
The problem is that a large portion of people just won't ever read anything on their own.
I feel like an observer. A perpetual student. An examiner of information of sorts. A feeler of feelings, an analyst of reality. It’s all I ever do and think, it’s all I really know.
I saw a video of someone experiencing an NDE. The person died and went into another dimension with a friendly smiling human and small gnome/dwarf like beings who looked a bit creepy but were friendly, asking the person "What did you learn?" or "What did you experience?", not sure which one it was. But it was very interesting. I've all my life also just felt like an observer. Just sitting in the back of a car, obeserving the world. If anything, what im trying to say, is maybe, just maybe, we who observe have something/someone to report to when we one day pass over. Maybe there's more to life, maybe there isnt. We are though part of the universe. So we are technically observing ourselves as the universe too.
I've felt like this forever. In just a short line of words, you've summed it up perfectly. Thank you. Blessings.
Same 👍🏼
Yup...I feel like I am just "auditing" this thing called "Life"...not really able to relate to the various social drills that most folks partake in, without even thinking things over. I am just coasting into what we call "Infinity"!
Welcome to the N.H.K.
being a deep thinker is being terrified you’re going to think too much and realize something you weren’t supposed to and you’re never going to see anything the same again
Happy, scared and relieved that i get this guy. Self awareness is a blessing until its a curse, seeing the world differently from others can be painfully lonely and its also really frustrating to be constantly stuck in an existential crisis.
It really is, I'm 22 years old and I've always been like this, I've tried many times to try and connect with others through this point of view or world perspective but I haven't met anyone in person that's been able to connect with me in this way. I feel very alone but relieved that there are people like us out there
@@pizza5572 This point of view or world perspective as you call it, isn't the only thing you can connect to people with. I think it's crucial not to become obsessed with things like these.
moral of the story, don't join Freemasonry
@@JefErickson100%. It’s all about balance. The balance of thinking like this, and going back into society. I love these types of topics but not everyone likes to think. It’s a shame because people are being controlled to not think of this and think of more trivial things. But ig it’s also good to not think about this 24/7 even though it might be the only thing you can think of for a while.
Self awareness is a gift, but with it comes new challenges. I like to think that you can think deeply and be self aware about everything, but there has to come a balance in how much you do it. You're still subject to many things outside of your control, your brain still functions on chemicals that help us survive, you can still have a relatively normal life in today's society despite the self awareness. Many people become nihilists or have feelings of despair that come with it, maybe it's the loneliness, the existential crisis that comes with it. But you can also detach from it, the feelings don't have to be disabling. There's the chase for the truth in many cases, or the want to be more enlightened, but you can't reach true satisfaction unless you detach, lose ego and live in the world the way you want. You can create your own meaning, we live in a world without some grand meaning, some people will look to something like religion for that peace or something else in their life, but no meaning also means that you can do whatever you want. You don't have to be attached to worldly desires, and at the same time, if you still chase worldly desires, you can do that too. You don't have to go about life in autopilot, but there's the balance in that you don't need to force yourself to be self aware all the time. The obsession with self awareness can be suffering in itself, you have to learn to detach from it too. It doesn't lead to ignorance, but it acknowledges that you're a human with limits too, and to make the best of the brain that nature gave you.
The hardest part is the isolation that comes with this level of self awareness.
I find most peace in solitude.
"“Loneliness is dangerous. It is addictive. Once you realize how much peace there is in her, you don't want to have anything to do with people." - Carl Gustav Jung
Why would it be hard? Don’t your enjoy it. Isn’t this your “choice”?
Stranger still, I've discovered the more self awareness I stumble upon, the more I long for ignorance. My very being here watching this, is to withhold me from giving in to the bliss that comes with disassociating from reality. The more I comprehend, the more my unconscious mind reaches back towards that which brought me joy, being the lack of consciousness itself.
@@FranklinWillberkein The way you refer to an “I” self means you’re still speaking from ego.
Self awareness almost feels like you know more then should, it allows you to be so connected with yourself you realize your lack of importance and purpose, you are but a grain of sand on the eternal beach
very true i reach the same conclusion as you. I think there is such a thing as over enlightment. And since every political ideological entity (even opposing ones) all preach to fight ignorance, we as philosophical outside observers who wont allow ourselves to get attached to any ideology too quickly believe that this common demoninator must be utter truth. But seems to be that ultimate search for truth is its own path to hell. The tricky question is given that ignorance (to some degree) is bliss, how can we get back to it again? It is way easier to go from ignorant to aware, then vice versa. But maybe thats the next biggest puzzle for us to solve. How to fight our way back to ignorance so we may enjoy our lives again.
How do you know that you are self aware? Because i highly doubt that iam self aware..... Everytime i say: "today iam doing something good for myself" and often end up with to much food in m stomach or too much alcohol in my veins or to much weed in my lungs...... And i alwas ask myself why i do this shit to me? So i dont think iam self aware. Iam thought. And thought thinks its self aware.
Yes despite it being said you are everything. Quite confusing! Be a pessimistic narcissist is what I get out of it 😂
@@janelle009 Its confusing because you use analysis. You are trained to analyse. But analysis is flawed and can never answer the first question, The first cause can not be found. Thats why analaysis will lead to eternal confusion and this confusion makes you pessimistic and narcissist. If you could observe that you are everything, than you would have your own personal proof. You would not need analysis. For example: Imagin you have never been in the water before. You want to know how it is to be in the water. Now you use analysis all day long for 20 years straight and learn everything about water. Do you now know what it is to be in the water? No. But when you jump in the Water you get to know it in an instant! Not 100 years of analysis couldt have teached you this. Thats why analysis is flawed and makes you bitter and sad.
Full awareness is realizing that you are the eternal beach.
"The truly wise man is the man who lets external events trouble him as little as possible. To do this, he needs to armor himself by surrounding himself with realities that are closer to him than those events, and through which the events reach him, changed so as to accord with those realities." - Fernando Pessoa
This makes so much sense !!!
I wonder why people like you google quotes just to get some likes instead of watching the video. The video was uploaded like 2 minutes ago so there is no way you could have watched it already. Anyway it tells you everything you need to know about the timeline we live in.
@@SomebodyYouUsedToKnow who cares if he did it for likes. I read it and liked it . I would never read it he didn't comment.
Wow
@@SomebodyYouUsedToKnow I didn't google this quote, I've read the book of disquiet and had some of my favourite quotes saved. I thought I'd share one. There was no ill intend behind to farm for likes.
Being self aware is agony. especially when u are stuck with mental illness, bad habits, addictions, etc that u can't control. sometimes, you confuse who is actually "aware", is it your body, or perhaps the voices in your head arguing over justifications of every actions u made. even without emotional intelligence, you are aware of how your actions affect others physically and emotionally. it feels like the best persona of yourself is trapped inside your head and act as the "voices" and the worst version of you act as the vessel that move by your command yet it feels wrong. to become self aware is to lead yourself to understand the nonexisting and pointless thoughts that haunts you when your vessel don't listen.
I feel sad that I can relate to this a bit too much.
You just described my life bro, lol
I will be thinking about this comment for the rest of my life.
change your patterns or characteristics you dislike about yourself or quality's, Change them in a positive manner it will take time but in due time it will become easier.
You can literally control all of that. Don't allow yourself to be weak.
It’s interesting how majority of existential crisis are induced by traumatic experiences. I honestly think I thought so deep I went a little insane. I just had the self awareness to realise that I’d come across crazy to others. It’s a bitter sweet, once you become fully self aware, you can’t lie to yourself…. You see the ego in others and ignorance truly is bliss.
And people will call you a “badmind” when you see the ego in others, i fully get this ^! This what’s in my brain for so long.. it’s like i understand life and existence/people so well i can’t communicate with normal persons like they NPC’s or something.
To me, your first sentence makes no sense because you don't define the word "existential". If you mean subjective, or psychological, just say that. A traumatic experience may be a crisis. Whether an inner or outer crisis or trauma. It can be both. Is there a difference between crisis and existential crisis?
@@davidmayhew8083 an existential crisis induced by trauma to me means that something so traumatic has happened that nothing has been comparable. If you have the ability to recover, then anything else is incomparable… it makes day to day worries insignificance and thus sets you free…. You become indifferent which opens up the ability to see things outside of yourself in third person. This is the start of existential awareness… it’s obviously multilayered and you could argue its maturity, but it’s more… it’s a mix of maturity, loss of ego, loss of outcome dependence, and awareness that everything is a fleeting moment and we to some this is scary, to some it’s bliss.I personally believe that the more intelligent you are, the higher probability you will reach a deeper state of self awareness…. The way a fish only knows water, to the fish that jump out the water and understand to them another ‘dimension’ outside in the air to a dolphin that recognises themselves in a mirror… many levels…. And to me, this is all the ingredients needed to reach an existential crisis in which you realise life is everything and nothing all at once.
These kind of stories makes you wonder, how many of such incredible works of so many people are or might be out there waiting to be found, and still so many lost forever.
There are an infinite amount. Reflection is key. Frequencies reveal wisdom. Resonance offers clarity. But what is beyond the combination of all three has no word nor definition in any language of humanity's creation. 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ "Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In Time, all points converge; hope's strength, resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again." 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ --Diamond Dragons (series)
@@Novastar.SaberCombat Besides the first sentence this has nothing to do with the original comment. And the rest is bullshit because first of all, where can i find this nothingness you're talking about and second, 432 hz or some other pseudo-psychology shit is not real and sounds do change your brain but not permanently. To achieve what you are talking about isn't even a question of technique, it's in fact about accepting everything and not trying to change or worry about things out of control as of the present. Letting go is the only thing that ever truly works
Nobody knows I'm really Elvis Presley. 😉
I also think this kind of discovery have less chance of happening 100 years from now, if such an author existed today, because there's so much competition. Back then, you can send manuscripts to publishers and they'd actually take a look. Nowadays they're swamped, so you can only get published via media connections. You'll notice the vast majority of best sellers and award winning authors got their start writing for newspapers and magazines.
I've often thought about that. Kafka wanted all his writings burned upon his death, but his friend who agreed to do it changed his mind after reading them all, believing they were too important. The dozens of massive paintings and 10s of thousands of pages of writing by the Janitor/Artist Henry Darger we're destined for a dumpster after he died, but the new owner of the building, Nathan Lerner, was an artist, and discovered the trove while cleaning out Darger's former apartment, and decided it needed preserved. I wonder how many incredible journals and novels have wound up in a landfill or are sitting in a soggy cardboard box molding in a basement somewhere
This goes to show that your childhood is such a massive part of not only who you are but who you will become. It's hard to deny that experiencing such trauma as a little boy wasn't the root to his undeniable self awareness and suffering.
Was thinking the same
no longer human by osamu dazai portrays this very well! def worth a read
"Reflect upon the Past. Embrace your Present. Orchestrate our Futures." --Artemis 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ "Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind’s journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul’s fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope’s strength re-steeled. But to earn final peace at the universe’s endless refrain, We must see all in nothingness... before we start again." 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ --Diamond Dragons (series)
Painful realisation when i remember most of high school i was paranoid at how to socialise or why, and made a movie in my head that they were all superior and i was inferior, and tried to overcompensate faking my personality, while never making direct contact with them, and then realising it was pointless if they only knew a shell of me, then fell into sadness and cracked hard at realising how stupidly simple things always were
@@danielotero9038 you’ve hit the nail directly on the head I can’t even tell you
“Life is so short” not for the self-aware person…every moment is filled with heavy introspection, it’s liberating but my gosh is it exhausting
This was honestly one of the toughest things I put myself through. I remember being outside and it was as if I “woke up” I questioned everything and dove into trying to find the answer to everything. I felt mad, I felt like nothing was real. It got to a point where every second of my life I was aware of what I was doing. It wasn’t fun because i couldn’t allow myself to dive into whatever was happening. Whenever I try to explain this to anyone else I try to make them feel, and understand my experience but 1. I wouldn’t want them to go through that and 2. It’s such a strong experience that words can’t properly explain what I went through / go through
I can absolutely understand what you mean. I am going the same myself and although I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemies but at the same time would wish it for everyone. A great paradox.
im experiencing this rn :( every second of my life im aware of everything im doing that nothing feels real, and i just cant focus/live in the moment.. i got this self awareness all of a sudden like 4 months ago and it just hasnt been the same for me ever since. while its gotten better by then, sometimes every few hours id suddenly remember how i exist and i dislike the feeling 😭 its also starting to be a habit for me to instantly become self aware the moment i wake up, like as soon as i wake up id think "ah i still exist". i just hope this self awareness will stop soon cuz its mentally draining
@@jellypawpholy crap I wonder if this is what I’m going through rn; how you explain it is kinda how I feel but idk if it’s the same thing or not. It’s almost as if I’m physically living in the moment but mentally I’m not there and I’m not aware of what I’m doing but at the same time I know what I’m doing. It’s hard to explain.
@@6Slick6Rick6try concentrating on breathing and immediately the brain stops thinking. I feel blessed for the internet as this is what makes me feel belonged (such comments relating what I feel/think) I have been in this state for nearly 10years now and the only advice I have to survive is to have faith in any god u like (God is what man created not the other way around) bcoz the ones who created god knew the dilemma and had this solution of faith/belief in the universe that he is (god) doing everything and not we (person himself) and the life force is flowing through us achieving the greatest good if only we let it. Let it guys. Let it.
Oh im so happy to see that im not the only one because it is really isolating and we sometimes need to be remined that there are others like us. Especially, as you mentioned, not being able to talk with someone about it and unburden your soul because you dont want them to think the way you do. But, im also happy that i am like this, i love to think and wonder and cant imagine a different thought process. When it first clicked in my head, i almost ended up in a psychiatric hospital because i thought i was going insane lol Stay lucid
Fernando Pessoa was not an obscure figure in his time in Lisbon. He was a very active member of the modernist movement in Portugal, being one of the creators of Orpheu magazine, and friend of great poets and writers such as Mário de Sá Carneiro and others. His poetry is widely studied in Brazil and Portugal.
Oooo
In the Spanish speaking world we like him very much too
@@krishnasinha1977 I never knew the same letter repeated many times could say so much about a person and what they’re like.
yes was known by a very small elite how much of his inner world was know to those who knew him?
Yes, thank you! He didn’t write in obscurity, he was known and loved. He lived in Chiado, a true hub of art and literature and philosophy at the time. He and other writers, artists and intellectuals used to meet at A Brasileira do Chiado, which Pessoa practically made his second home (hence the bronze statue sitting at the esplanada) :) I’m terribly proud that he is being talked about tho
"It sometimes occurs to me with sad delight, that if one day the sentences I write are read and admired, then at last I'll have my own kin, people who understand me, my true family in which to be born and loved. But far from being born into it, I'll have already died long ago." I feel sad yet happy at the same time reading this. Thanks
How can I report this comment to the gay police?
@@dandavid2027 Should be close to you in gay town
This is my story. Is it your original words or from another? (but still I know they are yours because you spoke them)
@@dandavid2027 this is a certified dan david moment
@@dandavid2027 lol
Coming to this realization (in some aspects) is what sent me through a severe depression, still to this day. A few months after graduating HS & turning 18, I got a glimpse of the real world and this kind of info hit me like a truck. What the most frustrating & damaging part was that I couldn’t express these thoughts/feelings to anyone, family nor friend, and have them be reciprocated, or them just dismissing it as “overthinking” or that I’m crazy or just I’m talking nonsense. They didn’t start taking what I said seriously until I started showing visible signs of depression (or at least the ones they became aware of) about a year later. By that point I was a complete mess. I never socialized apart from work, everything was dirty, got addicted to drugs, and started speaking in monotone/with no energy. I admitted myself to a psych ward twice & was placed on suicide watch the first time. 99% of the time I tried expressing how I felt to a “professional” they would dismiss it as the modern “woke” BS ppl spew nowadays & offered me medication (which I denied). This was a few months after I had turned 18, I am 24 now. What is & has kept me going through all of this is, thankfully, knowing I’m not truly alone. I may not be able to talk directly to others, or even people who are aware of more than I, but knowing that others are experiencing the same, and more, gives me a level of comfort I had never known. That being said, it genuinely pains my soul knowing Fernando Pessoa lived this experience all by himself. That same realization is what drove me to almost commit suicide. I couldn’t imagine the weight of bearing that burden until death. I wish more people would understand, no matter what level/wavelength they’re on: You Are Not Alone. Keep your head up!
What is important young Teaspoon is that your insides are working just fine. Although I don't agree with looking backwards, sometimes we must have something to compare to. Ask yourself why you have feelings of negatively about your situation. This is a step in a positive direction. You cannot fathom that which is unfathomable. Put those things on the shelf and tend to them when you are ready. You can only see things from your standpoint. But it will change. Your advantage is that you will reflect and evolve. Constantly. Don't be deceived by false information. Depression isn't a bad thing; it is merely a state of learning from a different point of view. Learn from it and move forward. You will hear advise and memes and never seem get anywhere. It is up to you to establish a simple framework plan and move forward with your basics tools. One day I stood there contemplating what my purpose was in life. I stood in one spot and slowly turned around in a circle. I discovered I am at the center of the universe and nothing exists without me. It made me feel important and my search for answers began. The smartest thing I did was take a big dry erase board and write my ideas on it as they came to me. Sometimes they seem like memes, but they are my memes. Some are funny one line jokes. Some are reminders. They are there on my bedroom wall and sometimes when I read one, I ask myself what the heck I was thinking? I wish I had elaborated more on that one lol. Young Teaspoon. You are here 📍 and you want to get.........................here🎯 Make a plan. Speak your mind through your heart. You will become greater and earn respect from yourself and others. Apologize for your mistakes and those you truly offend and you will motivate others and radiate great energy. When you're at the center of the universe.... May this help on your great journey. Dave
You should seriously get on an antidepressant though. Js... You don't have to feel that way. Why make yourself suffer for no reason. It's probably just a chemical imbalance you are feeling.
@@Andrea-ml5uw Yes, just take the magic drug cocktails and be happy, there's nothing wrong with the world and society. Otherwise whos gonna fill the pockets of the pharmaceutical industry?
@@l.palacio9076 Ok. Obviously we can argue this point all day long, and you are not wrong, but just like any other ailment, if there is a medicine that takes away the suffering with little to no side effects, why make yourself suffer for political positions and plain stubbornness. In all reality, the only person you're hurting is yourself. Not to mention, you're not going to fight and win any battle anywhere when you're suffering from depression.
@@Andrea-ml5uw Little to to no side effects is a hella of a stretch talking about anti depressants, to say the least. I have a few depressed friends, some take anti depressants, they have no libido, they have uncontrollabe shakes etc, and the worst part is that they are in no way better than the other depressed friends that takes no medications
“Perhaps by dreaming you, I am creating a real you, but in another reality; perhaps you will be mine there, in that other purer world, where we will love each other but never touch, with a different kind of embrace and other more essential ways of possessing one another? Perhaps you existed already, and I did not create you ñ, but merely saw you with a different way of seeing, interior and pure, in another, more perfect world?” I cried reading this because I felt like I loved him too, just in a different time line.
I thought like this for about a year and had to step away from it. It was effecting my sanity and my health. And the worst part of it is; you can’t talk about it with other people very much bc most people can’t comprehend thinking that far. It’s just scary.
Facts the other day I was questioning my sense of touch like why the fuck does it give me some sort of constant pain to feel touch this feeling? Like whahhh???? And I started analyzing my hand ✋ and all the lines on it 🤭🤫😂😂😂 don’t be alone for too long guys you start questioning everything!
It's pain.
If it can help you, this is my answer from another comment: "I found myself thinking about the themes about Pessoa wrote in that book, before even knowing about it. My answer to the question ('What's the point of it?') was: I have been given the gift of life by the universe, the ability to enjoy and share things, if I want. That's the point of it all, whatever you like, whatever you choose. Life is your b1tch. Is there only for you, so that you can enjoy it, or do whatever you want with it, like a b1tch."
I find it difficult to talk about because what if they do understand...? I often feel I've went too deep, I don't regret it but a part of me can't help wishing I could forget. I suppose in a sense ignorance is bliss... But what you don't know can and will hurt you, yet knowing too much will do the same? I'm always hesitant to share what I believe to be true or what my thoughts really look like. Yes, most would not understand, but is the off chance that they would worth the risk? Would it provide any sense of comfort? Knowledge and ideas aren't always meant to be shared. The thought of making someone feel as lost as I do because they asked a question and got more than they bargained for would haunt me. I don't want to harm anyone, so I find myself desperately trying to spare everyone. I hate forcing myself to seem happy or okay as to not worry anyone. I can't get this constantly nagging feeling to go away and I can't help but pity those I care about. This comment section has been the one truly relieving remedy I've found and I'm incredibly grateful for it.
You suffer because you still identified with this non-self, there's nothing depressing about being boundless, depression is only found in perspectives and perspectives never show the whole, they are always false, like that famous story of the blind men describing the elephant.
If you ask yourself “what’s the point?”, the point is whatever you decide is the point. Find something meaningful to you and live for it, dive towards it and grab it tight and never let it go, because that is what will bring you comfort and resolution. It could be a person, a passion, a way of life, as long as it means something to you it’s worth pursuing and clinging to it.
Your propose to create your own illusion and stick to it. The funn thing is that you started in an illusion and now you want to break out of this illusion with another illusion. You will still be confused as hell when reality finds you :/
@@fleecemane2638 True. The philosophy is known as absurdism. I would argue that this is giving things personal meaning. Even though granting things personal meaning is pointless in the grand scheme of things, but when even the grand scheme of things is pointless, then what are we supposed to do? Die? Committing suicide without contemplating the inevitability of death and the inescapability of the suffering of life, as well as one's actions forward, is a bit of a sad existence (in my worldview at least). Suffer without doing anything? Humans are instinctually programmed to avoid suffering (according to biology evolution), so even if we don't know what the point of adhering to instinct is, it's not going to help increase self-awareness. Wanting to be self-aware is in and of itself a pursuit that we do not know why we pursue. It is only an instinct to learn more about our world, but pursuing self-awareness is itself pointless in the grand scheme of things, just like granting things personal meaning. The thing is, if we want to keep being self-aware - even without knowing the point - sometimes, we need coping mechanisms to become more self-aware, and that would be absurdism.
@@theblackvoid First of all you have to stop analysis. Analysis is flawed when you want to find truth. You cant find the first reason. (I hope you know why , cant explain it here). If you cant find the first reason, analysis will ALWAYS be missing something. But truth can only be absolut. So Analysis is not a good tool to find truth. Thats why all your thoughts will never come to an end. As long as you ask for the reason, your are alread lost if you expect a an absolut answer. " would argue that this is giving things personal meaning. Even though granting things personal meaning is pointless in the grand scheme of things, but when even the grand scheme of things is pointless, then what are we supposed to do?" ----> Good observation. When you ask "what are we supposed to do" you are already asking for the reason. Going back to analysis and therefore will never ever have an total answer to everything. "Die? Committing suicide without contemplating the inevitability of death and the inescapability of the suffering of life, as well as one's actions forward, is a bit of a sad existence (in my worldview at least)." ----> Its still movement of thought that is asking this question. Why you want a purpose? Why you ask "what to do"? "Suffer without doing anything? Humans are instinctually programmed to avoid suffering (according to biology evolution), so even if we don't know what the point of adhering to instinct is, it's not going to help increase self-awareness." ----> You suffering is a result of your thoughts. When do we realy suffer? Most of the times its just the illusion that breakes and therefore we suffer. If we wouldnt had any illusions, we would not suffer that much. "Wanting to be self-aware is in and of itself a pursuit that we do not know why we pursue. It is only an instinct to learn more about our world, but pursuing self-awareness is itself pointless in the grand scheme of things, just like granting things personal meaning." ----> You are pretty good when you can see this, but you made a crucial "mistake". What shall this "grand scheme of things" be? Its both the same: movement of thoughts. If you want to be selfware, its movement of thoughts. When you think about the "great scheme" , its still movement of thought. Its realy, realy funny! Since i see this i wake up every morning with a smile! Because i understand that thought is cunning. Thought is conditioning me and therefore iam not able to see the truth. I lose myself to thinks like "the grand scheme" or "meaning of life" or "purpose of life" etc. Thats all bullshit. Its all movement of thought and its all an illusion, if not connected to the real world. I think if one has not understood this, eternal confusion arises. Therfore people will suffer and dont even know why they suffer, like i myself did many , many years. Jiddah Krishnamurti pointed at this incredible stuff.
@@theblackvoid If you start observing instead of thinking .... you can see how you react to things. You can expierence yourself for the first time because at the moment, thought is preventing a clear view on yourself. Thought tells you who you are and what to do. All people are conditioned. When we are conditioned we cant realy see what kind of people we are. Therefore people often dont know themself. They only know how they want to be or what they "think" they are. And the way to hell is paved with good intentions. Thus we see the great hypocrisy
There's no point, anything you do someone will do it better, and any relationship you build will suck by default as a male cause women are horrible creatures . List goes on, you can strive for perfection from the moment you are born and be struck down abruptly at any time, we only exists to fulfill the selfish desires of our parents.. that's why i have a love and hate relationship with my parent's. I love then for raising me but i also hate them for having me, you shouldn't have a kid unless rich or genetically gifted in some way.
Of course I could never express these feelings as poetic and beautifully as he did, but I certainly relate to this a lot. This is something that caused a huge existential crisis in me. It made me wonder if I should just end my life, because it seemed so pointless, meaningless. I think so deeply and I don’t have people who relate to this. I don’t relate to the problems of my peers because they care so much about the littlest things. But just as I was starting to slip way too deep into this, I started reading a few books. Because despite feeling so nihilistic about life, I still cared to keep going. And especially books like those about the Japanese concept of ikigai made me realize that there is actually a huge point to life. Life is about living. It’s about being in the moment. When I finally realized this and put it into action, slowing down my life, paying attention to the smallest things, and feeling happy about them, I became happier. I just went to my prom yesterday, after I didn’t see my peers for a few weeks during finals, and the detox from the drama made it possible for me to detach from their drama as well. I danced, although I can’t dance. I literally didn’t care. I danced with friends of my peers that I didn’t even know, something I would’ve never done. Keeping away from all that drama and unimportant things, I managed to live in the moment and enjoy it. I was happy just being there and feeling alive. Nowadays, after this sort of detox from drama and overstimulation of dopamine from social media such as tiktok, I managed to come down to a level of peace of mind where I literally get happy just walking in the kitchen and finding out my family bought some fruits I like. Literally. I get happy looking out the window and seeing cute birds walking around. The smallest things are the most precious. Okay I don’t really know what else to say. Just enjoy life. If you are at this kind of existential crisis point, please keep going. No matter what. If you feel like nothing matters, just please take a look around. There are always things that matter. Family. Friends. Even material things that make you happy. They are not to be taken for granted. Maybe the sun is shining. Maybe it’s raining and you might think that sucks, but a cute quote I just read today says “no rain, no flowers”. It will pass and bring even more beauty. And that actually can be passed on to the whole of life. Downs will pass eventually. You might need to take a little action depending on your situation, but it will certainly pass in some way. And then, the up arrives, and it will bring beauty. Live in the moment and realize what makes you happy. Your delicious lunch, the beautiful weather, the nice smell of flowers. A beautiful person, even a stranger. Make a new friend, go outside. Enjoy life. It is pointless. Yes. But you’re already here so why not enjoy it. Fighting the fact that you’re alive is so much harder and more painful, giving up on life, it’s a very personal decision. But accepting that everyone has the ability to become happy, can change your outlook on life. Look for the positive things. It will make you smile. It takes a ton of time but eventually you will realize that everything is a coin, everything has two side. Choose the one that makes you happy. Your reality is subjective. Glass half full, half empty. Rain is bad or it waters the earth. It is up to you, so choose to be happy if you want to be happy. It is a decision. You deserve to be happy. I love you all and I hope despite of this probably being a novel by now, might have inspired someone to rethink some views on life ❤️
Ok I just want to add, also, downs are what make life feel so precious. If you always have a perfect day every day, you will get used to it overtime and become numb to it. But if there are bad days, okay days, great days, it is balanced and makes the beautiful days so much more precious. Even if it’s just once a month you have a good day. Write down what you liked. Take photos so you can look at them and remember. It is so precious to live through the bad times to see the beautiful times and experience them.
Enjoy the life, " the exactly the same solution that our great poet " kayyam " has advised us from 11 century. Do u know khayyam?
Needed to hear all of this it makes so much sense to me.
This was so beautiful and very needed this morning. Crying silent tears. I hope you’re well, friend. 💕💕
@@LeonSKennedy2002focus on the bloodline leon!
As a portuguese person who watches commentary or documentary videos a lot I never thought I’d see one about Fernando Pessoa. I mean yeah he’s famous but I thought people outside of Portugal didn’t really know about him 😭 Either way I’m studying him in school at the moment, my favorite poem of his is “Quando vier a Primavera” which they don’t teach in my school but I just found the poem somewhere 🙏🏻
Estudamos a literatura dele no Brasil tambem
He understood the horror of infinite potential and it was enough to consume him entirely. If you've ever glimpsed it with your mind, you understand why we are blessed to be so small.
You worded this so well. Yes - infinite potential. It’s the most addictive yet scary subject to ponder.
true, I think most of us prefer our existential nightmares to be served to us as a mortal anthology, punctuated by amnesia between lifetimes
How about infinite lost potential Aging and realising you could've not imitated others hoping to attain the happiness they had, but instead searched for it your own way, it's like feeling manipulated by your own lies
Lol just work
From Fernando Pessoa: "After Everything" From everything three things remained The certanty that we are always starting The certanty that we must go on The certanty that we can be interrupted before finishing So we must Turn that interruption into a new path From a fall a new dance step From the fear a ladder From the dream a bridge From a quest a meeting
even in english that has a gong . Thanks
That's really cool ✌️
It sounds nice but it isn't Pessoa's, it's from a 1956 novel called "O Encontro Marcado" by Fernando Sabino
Não é do Fernando Pessoa
Neat but possibly, maybe not. Nice tho thnx peace
I truly think he had borderline personality disorder but not the one media tells you about, but the real one: emptiness, doubt of self, feeling nothing but also feeling everything, periods of emotional unstability, the rabbit hole while trying to understand his existence... it was probably triggered because of losing his family. With no antidepressants, that disorder is truly destructive of one-self.
histero-neurasténico
There were antidepressants. It's called alcohol. He died of liver cirrhosis due to over-drinking. Poor man...
I would say he was a schizoid
@@JippenNo, definitely not.
@@Kitsuragi556 maybe, I only based it on the main character/narrator of the Book of Disquiet
As a native Portuguese speaker, I feel privileged to have read such rich and profound literature in an unaltered form. Precisely because of the heteronyms he created, in Brazil he is nicknamed Fernando Pessoas, pessoa meaning person, as the video showed, and pessoas meaning its plural (people). He was all of them, and they were all him.
The more I learn the more confused about my nature I become. The older I get, the more strange life becomes. I felt like I was meant to be here as a child. Now I just feel like I’m visiting
That's a lack of novelty in your life; the older you get, the fewer new things you do and learn, the less you remember and consciously do, the shorter and less unique the days feel.
"Reflect upon the Past. Embrace your Present. Orchestrate our Futures." --Artemis 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ "Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind’s journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul’s fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope’s strength re-steeled. But to earn final peace at the universe’s endless refrain, We must see all in nothingness... before we start again." 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ --Diamond Dragons (series)
Giraffes are giraffing, trees are treeing, stars are starring, clouds are clouding, rain is raining & people are peopling. Alan Watts
The key is finding peace in the moment where we find ourselves.
You have very accurately expressed how I have also felt since my childhood’s end. Thank you.
Im about 80 pages into the book of disquiet and I can’t remember the last time a book had me dissecting paragraphs this intensely. The way he uses metaphors is beautiful.
Are you reading the one with the complete edition? I was searching on Amazon but there are too many of the books with the same name
@@daydreamer5947 Since he penned that under one of his heteronyms, it probably adds up to your confusion. :\
I can't find the book. What's the author's name?🤔
@@s1mone477the author’s name is Fernando PESSOA
Can you post a link to where you purchased the book?
It's interesting how this video groups together many people going through rough times. People who aren't struggling in some way likely aren't watching this video, it's what I've come to realize when going through tough times, videos recommended usually reflect this. I hope that you guys all get through it.
I got chills, ive been myself documenting my own spiral into an existential nihilistic philosophy/depression. Hearing that someone was experiencing life like i do kinda makes me feel not so lonely and perturbated at the same time, since it validates every sense of meaningless that fills my thoughts.
In Portugal, this book was mandatory to study in High school. Now Fernando Pessoa's poems as himself or as his heteronyms are the only content we study about this brilliant Poet. Speaking of experience.
I think that's a bit sad when we have so much good writers that now you don't learn about at all.
I want to came and stady there plz
@@bahmedkhiat1145 no you don't lol
@@isaacduraes7685 why is that?
@@bahmedkhiat1145 annoying study programs
"Não sou nada. Nunca serei nada. Não posso querer ser nada. À parte isso, tenho em mim todos os sonhos do mundo."
Álvaro de Campos. Sempre foi um dos meus heterónimos menos preferidos, mas esse poema é espectacular
ele era esquizofrênico?
@@swim2912 Quem sabe né? De todos os poemas que eu já li ou ouvi narrados do Fernando Pessoa eram os mais difíceis de entender. Procure o poema tabacaria do Fernando Pessoa narrado pelo Abujamra.
O incrível poema "Tabacaria". Chega a arrepiar só de lembrar.
"Cheio de Deus, não temo o que virá, pois, venha o que vier, nunca será maior do que a minha alma", esta parte tudo
This is pure madness. IVE BEEN there for years. So absobed into tought and absolutely disconected from reality. Thats like living with only 50 % of yourself,the intelectual one, trying to fill the other 50% but failing to do so. Having dogs and animals showed me how to just exist without freaking out about it. Infinite and emptyness are not meant to be understood intellectually
Yes!! Me too! I don’t think I would have gotten through it without my dog and cat. I felt broken, truly. I didn’t know who to trust or tell things to because everyone thought I was crazy, so my dog and cat taught me to trust and love (as well as the voices in my head) lol. And I learned who I am in my heart, stripped of everything.
Truly a paradox but really a matter of perspective. In the same way that there is no direct “point” to life meaning it is meaningless, life being meaningless therefore means you can provide it any meaning you want. I really liked the point of how he contradicts himself by writing about how his efforts offer no reward and he has no purpose in life, but in a way he found his own purpose and meaning
That's what I call a "cursed" book, something so profound that leaves you numb.
Reflection is key. Frequencies reveal wisdom. Resonance offers clarity. But what is beyond the combination of all three has no word nor definition in any language of humanity's creation. 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ "Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In Time, all points converge; hope's strength, resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again." 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ --Diamond Dragons (series)
We've pain&fear, peace, temptation, & motivation, perception, doubt & believe. Valuing many correlation, meaning many integration & disintegration. Labelling many purpose, then we've reality. Sometimes we feel empty, confuse, regret, & pain. We feel like to take care of those things. But we don't. bcoz we feel in love with those things. It's like paradox. We attach to those things. Is there something we can do bout it? What do we need to witness first? What do we need to do?
What a beautiful way to put it!
He’s Rick Sanchez
It truly amazes me and baffles me in those moments where I am self-aware enough to really put myself into perspective, to put my life into perspective as compared to the grand scheme, or whatever. It is super impressive, and I often wonder if other animal species, or species in general have these traits, these thoughts, these existential dreads and worries. Humans are so fascinating, I truly fascinate myself, and that by itself is crazy!
you described my thoughts perfectly
@@MsLoriGold there’s no way that any other animal could even begin to come close to the level of self awareness humans have. They might have some sort of perception of self, but they can’t think deeply about life, meaning or anything of the sort. If they could, they would behave differently.
@@MsLoriGold I’d advise to just not look at the news at all. What is it giving to you? Is it serving you? If not then it’s better to stop consuming news content in any form and focus on improving your own life and those around you.
I wonder if even humans are able to really comprehend what life and self awareness of reality really is. I imagine every animal is as self aware as their minds can comprehend. I imagine the real meanings and innerworkings of life/existence & reality is far beyond our comprehension. Like I feel like a human being fully self aware and understanding in every aspect of existence is like the equivalent of expecting an ant to be as self aware as we are. We just don't know it, because we can't comprehend it lol. Which is why I feel like so many people rely on religion as a way to comprehend things we can't fully understand.
@@atum222 your fascination comes from your limited understanding... what people really are and what they are really motivated by... the things that we would do to each other in chaos without judgement. once you go even further you realize that you want nothing to do with any of it... trying to sever yourself from what we are is a better way to live
Psilocybin saved my life. I was addicted to heroin for 15 years and after Psilocybin treatment I will be 3 years clean in September. I have zero cravings. This is something that truly needs to be more broadly used in addiction treatment.
Psychedelics saved me from years of uncontrollable depression, anxiety and illicit pill addiction. imagine carrving heavy chains for over a decade and then all of a sudden that burden is gone. Believe it or not in a couple years they'll be all over for treatment of mental health related issues.
@Micheal Harris Can dr.sporess send to me in UK?
Dr.spores is the best, he's been my supplier for anything psychedelics.
Girl. 🧡well done!
guys these above me are bot dont try that shit (it’s not a dangerous drug but the style of publicity of this stupid ass doctor makes me think it must be some kind of cheap lisergic acid that could fuck up your nervous system)
Being human is less about discovering a self and more about creating a self. This is the essence of what it means to be human: creating what it means to be human.
"My soul is impatient with itself, as with a bothersome child; its restlessness keeps growing yet is forever the same. Everything interests me, yet nothing holds me. I attend to everything, dreaming all the while." ~ Fernando Pessoa 1888 - 1935
You’re gay
I feel for this man. I have the same problem and it's not fun. My biggest question is what's the point? You literally go down a rabbit hole and it drives you crazy if you keep going. I see things different than others and do things differently. I'm not the most literate person in the world but I have caught myself asking myself questions and talking to myself. Trying to answer them with no real outcome
The point of what? If you can't find an answer you're not asking the right question.
I felt similar to how you do when I was younger and I came to this conclusion - there is no point, not one we can prove anyway. Focus on the things you enjoy in life and ignore the things you don't, as best you can. Step away from obsessive self-reflection, it leads only to depression. Learn to enjoy the small things in life, marvel at how strange it is that any of us are here at all. I have actually turned to religion, although I suppose deep down I'm an atheist. I enjoy the spiritual traditions humans have come up with in order to answer the questions we have always asked ourselves. I find it calming to pray and hand myself over to a higher power for a breif time, whether he/she/it exists or not. It reminds me to be thankful and not take my privileges for granted.
Turn to the reality of God your creator for comfort
I feel much the same as you, my only salvation is knowing (believing) that this is only part of a much bigger journey that has passed and also has yet to come.
@@zeeqayum4834 I've tried that but I came to realization that doing that's just mean committing to delusion in pursuit of comfort, which You know we do everyday , every second, things like entertainment are distraction from reality. But religion just give me the icky feeling of imposing pretentious rule to myself and others.
I shed tears without getting a runny nose or my heart rate changing, i felt so seen and heard felt like a hug that i’ve needed for so long. The living passoa.
True that, I'm grateful that I stumbled upon here.
I often used to talk about the bliss of ignorance but for me it’s so hard to try to be blissful in ignorance. I can’t help having that consciousness in the back of my head at all times and yes it has saved me but it has also has held me back.
This video essay moved me. I would be lying if I said I didn't feel tears well up in my eyes as Pessoa described being understood only after his passing. This life, can be a very morose and sobering experience, and I often find myself feeling...not truly human. How do all these people around me keep moving, day after day, aware of themselves? I wish I could've hugged Pessoa, told him he is not alone, that I understand completely and that he has put into beautiful words what I have failed to express to important people in my life, watching them leave as I struggled with the basic task of understanding myself. I am Pessoa's kin, thankful for his life and his writing.
we as people tend to not value what we have, but only truly value it after we lose it
I feel the exact same - I’ve found that though we cannot comprehend what has happened before our birth, things out of our “field of knowledge” during our lives or what may happen after that we must just do with what we have. The most initially terrifying but eventually comforting answers to the point of life is “I don’t know”.
Well said! I'm full of shame at myself while choking on tears of painful, loving compassion for my compatriot in this hellish, echoing hall of mirrors we call "life". Praying you find peace, brethren
I second you on this. Pessoa was a genius way ahead of his time and even today imo, he's seriously underrated. #Pessoa's kin 😎
I thought I was the only one who thought like I do.
After “finishing" my own journey I concluded this nice phrase to ground me. "Ignorance is bliss and knowledge is power" both are equally valuable to the human experience
I felt Innocence is Bliss and Knowledge is Curse!
Love is the key, when there is no key.
Much wisdom comes with much sadness
Existencial ignorance is bliss and financial knowledge is power, that way both can coexist
Choose ignorance to be happy, summon knowledge to finish problems. I can think of no other way to stay happy and positive
Never have I heard the way I've felt for years put in such a beautiful manner.
this just explained the dilemma i've been having for the past 23 years, we're taught that understanding our own metacognition is important but i've found that it only makes living even harder
Would you be that kind to explain your point any further?
He sounds like he felt isolated by the dissociation he felt after the loss of his father and brother, as well as his home land. That dissociation it seems followed him into the rest of his life, and as a way to try and save himself, he moved back to his country of origin... but that feeling of dissociation followed him. All this giving him an acute awareness of himself as a separate entity from himself. He lived in the dissociation brought on by loss until it swallowed him whole and it became him. He was the object staring out over a sea of memory and experience, and he couldn't step away from that, so he fragmented his personality, only metaphorically, so that he could write of it from a more objective point of view. Even though that "more objective" perspective could be seen now as somewhat chaotic. What he was essentially trying to do by writing under different pseudonyms, was to anchor himself in a vast and perilous ocean of his introspection and awareness, which ultimately was rooted in his intense dissociation. He wanted to be remembered and have a sense of kinship, but he felt the pursuit of that for himself to be hopeless... and so after realizing that, he felt his only option left was to observe and record, because that was the object he existed as, that was his role, his livelihood, his burden in life, and that was all he could muster the courage to accomplish. Surely though, I'm projecting, and I'll admit I relate to this man a great deal, these are only my assumptions and thoughts after hearing an excerpt of his final work read by a man I do not know over the medium of video and the internet. Thanks for reading my comment stranger and inwish you well.
Wow! Amazing insight!
Thank You
Nice take on Pessoa. The fact that you are aware of your own projection, makes you even more like him. It takes a good dose of humility to admit "own's stuff". Since you wish me well, one of many possible strangers who'll read this, have a nice year! Even if it comes with a 22 day lag.
@@SolusAgomor same to you stranger, thank you for the kind regards
Yes, that's what I think sums it up. Example, his parents passing at his early age relates to a lack of identity formation. His isolation, he had a depression watching contrasting elements around him coupled with a unique and persistent viewpoint of pure awareness..and the vague idea of who he might have been among other things. We can all relate to a trauma or that dissociation with our idea of who we are and reality. Suffering can be an opening to the ultimate truth of who we are and everything else. I think what interest me the most from his work is a revealing of the illusion we are a person.
Omg... it's beautiful to see a video essay about Pessoa by an english-speaking man :) To me, Pessoa is the only person I'd ever even consider to be anything close to an "idol", and I am delighted to see people worldwide appreciating his existence. And YES, you've said something that's very true and that portuguese people typically barely even mention - his name is PESSOA / PERSON. It is mind-blowing. It's almost as if he was born to represent a sort of totem for "Man". And his words are the purest I've ever read, because he wasn't blinded by the sight of illusions such as success, he was writing alone, for no one but himself, and died without experiencing success in any way - that made his writing the most honest and purest possible. It's beautiful. Great video, thanks!
Contemporaneo de krisnamurti, ciertamente parece que en algunas ideas sobre el vivir tenian una forma parecida de entenderla, en gallego Pessoa "dise, persoa". Saludos
Well, it's important to say that Fernando Pessoa was not alone in the true sense of the word. He had in fact a lot of contact with other intellectuals from his time, had a social life (Pessoa loved Coffee shops) and participated in important artistic movements and produced public work such as Orpheu magazine. Thus his entourage was good. He died as known person. Not famous, but surly not anonymous either. But is also a fact that he had deeply conflicts that even his friends and intellectuals cannot help and comprehend him.
No way it’s Nostalgik
Wow,I was writing that I was listening about a PERSON, I wonder if the last name Man/Mann has any role? To? & I heard he also said the Translation of PESSOA. 😮
Please tell how his writings have impacted you, and do you have a story of your own to tell?
I have never felt so connected to any book or author before. It feels like I am connecting to my own soul, to my soulmate, to a dead person whose soul is still alive, in these letters, these words, I feel as though we are not alone, I feel we understand eachother completely.
I feel exactly the same. I've mused before that I might be Pessoa reincarnated. I felt that close to him. It's funny, because as someone who obsesses over writing and keeping a diary, there's not really anything I can say to express myself that hasn't already been perfectly articulated by Pessoa and Clarice Lispector (my other favorite writer).
@@unmothered333 Now I must read Clarice Lispector.
"I am the nothing around which all this spins. "
"To erase everything from the slate from one day to the next, to be new with each new morning, in a perpetual revival of our emotional virginity - this, and only this, is worth being, or having, so as to be or have what we imperfectly are." These is my favourite quote from The Book of Disquiet, probably because it is the most optimistic.
Dissociative with no continuity. No narrative
We've pain&fear, peace, temptation, & motivation, perception, doubt & believe. Valuing many correlation, meaning many integration & disintegration. Labelling many purpose, then we've reality. Sometimes we feel empty, confuse, regret, & pain. We feel like to take care of those things. But we don't. bcoz we feel in love with those things. It's like paradox. We attach to those things. Is there something we can do bout it? What do we need to witness first? What do we need to do?
If you substitute "one moment" for "one day" you have Buddhism in a nutshell, and the core concept of true awakening, no matter what you label it. It wouldn't really matter if his diaries were burned or not. Either you "get it" or you don't, and it's always available beneath/beyond language.
That is the result of following the idealism. This philosophy does not give you any answers and cycles back upon itself just like Ouroboros. No wonder it feels empty and pointless.
“There are ships sailing to many ports, but not a single one goes to where life is not painful”. - Fernando Pessoa; ‘The Book of Disquiet’.
When you fixate on your destination too much, you can squander the opportunities to celebrate the journey with the people that you meet along the way. This is the trappings of nihilism.
"The impossibility of understanding and communicating one's internal experiences while on this free fall lends itself to a lifetime of disquiet and disorientation" I feel so seen in this moment. I hope one day I will come across another deep thinker like myself so I will not feel so utterly alone even though I am surrounded by people.
I’m too self aware. I’m always alone even around people. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.
We playing game dude, main character syndrome 😂
Dw, I also have this feeling. You’re not alone
@@mollyprice6508 I think my last comment was flagged Dk why? but thanks for your reply. I’m doing good now. Steer clear from pessimistic views when you’re down and out. Things are not as bad only what we make them to be.
Honestly it's very comforting to know that others have come to the same thoughts I have.
"Reflect upon the Past. Embrace your Present. Orchestrate our Futures." --Artemis 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ "Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind’s journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul’s fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope’s strength re-steeled. But to earn final peace at the universe’s endless refrain, We must see all in nothingness... before we start again." 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ --Diamond Dragons (series)
Same
@@Novastar.SaberCombat Ahh like the book launch video! Love the quote, how has your project been going so far?
The paradox of Self-awareness is that we aware our future, but we can’t change it even when it happens
no, the paradox is this: Love is the key, when there is no key.
@@MeshuggahDave. No the paradox is this:
@@SlurpKing100 no, actually your apathy is already accounted for by my argument. you won't get that though, hence why you commented something so telling of your comprehension level. Cheers trolly.
@@SlurpKing100 I like your paradox.
No the paradox is
That feeling of the more you watch this video, the more you feel connected to him, the heavier it feels deep in your heart that even a long sigh cannot take that heaviness away.
Fernando Pessoa is like the Shakespeare of the lusophone world In both Brazil and Portugal it's almost mandatory to learn and study him in class at some point. Despite his anonymity in life, nowadays his name is known by pretty much any lusophone in the world even if they never actually read his works.
In Portugal, we learn about Fernando Pessoa and his works, but we are also taught his letters, letters he would right to his few and close friends. In one of them, he explained that he suffered from long periods of "hysteria", alternated with long periods of sadness. I remember discussing this with my teacher because it seemed to me like he had some type of mood disorder. Adding to that his childhood traumas, incredible sensitivety to reality and struggles with identify and who he was, and considering that at the time in Portugal mental health wasn't really a subject, it doesn’t come to me as much of a surprise that he drank himself to death. He was as brilliant as he was tormented by a spirit that was never his own. My class was very interested in learning about him and we really enjoyed his work, despite his tragic life, because he had an unic hability to talk about the self, its lonelyness, and the journey to get to it and that we all have many people inside of us despite it all being contained in something that at first glance appears to be just one unit, one identity. Personally, I believe that because he a mood disorder, unlike most people, he would never be able to feel that, because the part of him that would sprout the next day did not depend on him. Nowadays, we could have told him that it wasn't his fault that he felt so lost in himself. That it is just how some mood disorders worked. Most likely, he had bipolar disorder. Quite sad, but either way we love his work.
Would telling him it wasn't his fault have really have helped any? From the little bit of information in the video, it doesn't seem like it would have made much difference. Perhaps he might have spent his life some other way if he could have received a viable treatment and been less disordered. But I think his understanding of reality would still have been colored by his previous experiences. FWIW the biblical book of ecclesiastes has some thematic similarities in that the writer/writers repeatedly emphasizes the contradictory nature of life and the ultimate meaningless of a man's labors.
Probably, ADHD. Some people have ADHD and BD, both together.
Yes, I'm also portuguese. Recentemente estive a ler um livro dele: "Páginas de Doutrina Estética" tem a carta dele a Cortes Rodrigues, ensaios que ele escreveu, outras cartas a amigos dele. E críticas literárias que ele fez. Recomendo a leitura. Identifico-me muito com ele. E não ele não era esquizofrénico ao contrário do que muitos pensam, e se ao ler a carta "A Génese do Heterónimos" refletirmos bem sobre o assunto percebemos isso. Nice to see another portuguese in this endless sea that is the internet.
@@manuelcardoso7595 o pior é pensar que ele podia escrever muito mais...
@@abelhaa1 É verdade.... Mas o que ele escreveu é incrível. Mas concordo consigo
i’m portuguese and seeing this topic discussed in a foreign channel really surprises me-
This video and these comments have bought me to tears. Discovering other people feeling and thinking and existing exactly the way I have all my life. We’re not so alone in our aloneness. Yet still so alone and always thinking and feeling.
I'm so glad you found your purpose and strive to fulfill it. You have a real gift for this and I'm so glad you decided to share it with all of us. I need to read this work by Mr. Pessoa.
My crippling self-awareness often strangles the beauty and joy out of what would otherwise be amazing experiences. “Stop thinking, you’re distracting yourself. Now you’re thinking about stopping thinking. Now you’re thinking about how you’re angry that you’re getting distracted by thoughts. Stop. STOP! I guess I’ll give up… What was I doing again?”
So true!
Exactly my problem, I haven't been able to truly feel joy since I started analyzing my existence more deeply. Any happy thought is instantly followed by "this is all meaningless and sooner or later you will cease to exist no matter how you feel" and I just fall into this awful melancholic indifference. Honestly I think I might need to see a therapist if this continues because I can physically feel myself losing my grip on reality
You can't think your way out of thinking. You can only bypass it. Take a leap of faith (e.g., place yourself in God's hands/let His will be done), practice being present to your body and the world around you (e.g., mindfulness, meditation, yoga), do something you love, etc. Some people go to booze & drugs. My mother is a big fan of sleep (which most of us need more of). I was in a class once where someone mentioned "putting the brain aside" by visualizing it as a chatterbox sitting on your shoulder -- off to the side. The monkey-mind, which is very good at creating angst & drama where there isn't and doesn't need to be any, is an ingrained way of being. Bypassing it involves a regular choice not to engage in it, a choice not to suffer because of it. And it usually takes a practice, whether religious or not. A yoga instructor once said to me it takes practice, practice, practice. Being with like-minded people helps some folks. One other idea - a daily dose of humor. Reminds us to not take ourselves too seriously. "The Onion" newsletter is a go-to for me. Peace & love ❤
@@Beth-sn9ip Amazing. God Bless
@@helf7297 Look up optimistic nihilism if you haven’t already!
*"The world is often unkind to new talent, new creations, the new needs friends...Not everyone can become a great artist, but a great artist can come from anywhere”* -Ratatouille
insane how such a profound quote came from a movie about a rat piloting a human mech
“I am the walrus”. John Lennon
Holy shit. I've never felt the way i felt when reading Pessoa. Like he was talking for me, translating what i could never formulate into words so beautifully. It makes me feel not so alone, it relieves the burden being trapped in my head. Although our bodies and mind will never meet, truly we are kin. Thank you Fernando.
Beautiful, and eloquent. Absolute poetry. Well done.
Pessoa is a genius. Super underrated, one of the best poets/philosophers of the 20th century. The Book of Disquiet is my favorite book ever. I felt like I had gained 15 points of IQ after I finished it, it's amazing
Reflection is key. Frequencies reveal wisdom. Resonance offers clarity. But what is beyond the combination of all three has no word nor definition in any language of humanity's creation. 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ "Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In Time, all points converge; hope's strength, resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again." 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ --Diamond Dragons (series)
@@Novastar.SaberCombat lol please don't quote diamond dragons
It's an award-winning series. Definitely better than things like 'Zon's "Rings of Power", "She Hulk", "Willow", last season of "The Witcher", and/or "Thor: Love & Thunder", so... what's your trollish, non-sequitur agenda, son? 😂🤣😂 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
Os just a Man.
Pessoa is not smart and his book is garbage. We many times may have this thought coming from deep sadness, futility and nihilism. But that doesn't mean the thought are right. You are just not ok. I see in Pessoa's mind, something similar like a messy room. No order, no direction. And somehow he deluded himself in believing that life is the same as it is in his own mind. No order, no direction.
As a Portuguese, this is great to see, he was way ahead of it's time, sadly we are enforced to study him while we aren't ready, we kind of understand and some of us did like it, but it's when you grow up that you get to the real meaning and understand more of what's going one, because some of his writings can be understood in different ways, things aren't always objective. Amazing video, thank you!
Pessoa na adolescência foi um farol para mim. Considerando que a minha família não acredita em terapia, Pessoa parecia ser o único humano a ter existido que seria capaz de compreender o que se estava a passar comigo. mas concordo em parte contigo, dado que a esmagadora maioria da malta da minha turma queixou-se o ano inteiro em que o estudámos, para 10 anos depois andarem a ler e a cita-lo e a darem-se ao luxo de ter um heterónimo preferido, lol
As a portuguese, I thank you for spreading information about one of the most fascinating authors that htis country has ever seen. Along with Camões, Eça de Queirós, and so many other, Fernando Pessoa may be known for centuries to come.
I cannot believe there were people who thought this far a century ago as well! I'm comforted by that fact but also saddened that this is going to keep happening until the existence of life. Now I'm writing this comment here and if by chance youtube still exists a century later(which I doubt it will), a similar thinker who's come at a standstill in their life would be reading this and feeling relieved that us, a century ago's people, think the same way as them.
I didn’t realize until pretty recently that most people don’t keep themselves awake at night and torture themselves during slow hours at work wondering endless about some of these ideas, I genuinely always thought of myself as a very average person I didn’t know just how much extra time I was spending being this much in my own head comparatively
you are wrong. most people have seen enough and know just enough to remain blissfully ignorant. It isnt that they cannot know. It is that they run away from the light. We must learn to shelter them and bolster them in order to bring us all together and learn the real truths. Love is the key, when there is no key.
@@MeshuggahDave.yes, but when you stop thinking about the modernised, warped view of religion - what is love? God is love. and justice.
@@N4jss who was talking about modernized religion, besides you?
@@MeshuggahDave. nobody. i'm bringing it up because i think it's an interesting topic
I do that aswell
thank you for mentioning portuguese literature in your channel, it rarely gets covered, but as a Portuguese I think it is worth people's time, really, thank you ❤️
Concordo plenamente contigo, literatura portuguesa é boa dms
Outro português com imagem de perfil de Pokémon? Não estava à espera disso...
I've never read an author I found so relatable. I find comfort and even some sort of mirror to my own writing (only a more well articulated version) in Pessoa's Book of Disquiet. Thank you Persuit of Wonder for leading me to this book :D
I found the "exposure to the ailment is part of the treatment" to be a phrase that really resonates with me when it comes to facing down nihilism, absurdity, and general misanthropy. Great metaphor and video.
Thank you for this. I say it with my heart on my hands. Thank you for doing these videos. You are kind of a salvation for these kind of obscure and pointless times we live in. ❤
existence is subjective. there is no we. im sorry you live in pointless times.
Pointless times are for you without real purpose. Real purpose for you exists. Search for it from the one who is the source of all purpose.
oh you poor individual...you consume too much fake and biased news
lols
And who is that? I suppose answer will be something about "god" and bla bla bla. Lol
"From small misunderstandings of reality we carve out beliefs and hopes and live off the crusts of bread we call cakes, like poor children playing happiness." - Fernando Pessoa
Wow ! This is amazing !
Og Og
Cake sniffers 😘
@@LakeWebb 😂😂😂👌🏻
We've pain&fear, peace, temptation, & motivation, perception, doubt & believe. Valuing many correlation, meaning many integration & disintegration. Labelling many purpose, then we've reality. Sometimes we feel empty, confuse, regret, & pain. We feel like to take care of those things. But we don't. bcoz we feel in love with those things. It's like paradox. We attach to those things. Is there something we can do bout it? What do we need to witness first? What do we need to do?
I feel so understood. All the thoughts and feelings I can't explain through words 🥺
Part of the paradox of self awareness is being immersed in a world of distraction, detachment, and demand to ignore your reality. It’s hard to have a conversation that sparks any emotion when the entire exchange is diluted to keep up with the social experience others demand. You learn not to share your knowledge because it only complicates your reality. So it simmers inside you. Maybe it appears in a journal here and there. Sometimes you’ll hand someone a poem or a piece of art. Excited as others are to see you and your creations, you have to pretend you’re not insulted by ignorance; the way people overlook the pain that caused art to be formed in the first place.
"Viver não é necessário. Necessário é criar" ("Living is not necessary. It is necessary to create") This quote by Fernando Pessoa has been with me since middle school. As a Designer myself i can't imagine nothing more precious.
That's awesome. He perfected Camoes' quote. By the way, I recommend that you read a book called: The Courage to Create, by Rollo May.
I feed my dark self with such content it's odd how it makes me feel better after having a mini existential dread
The cross wiring in our brains between pleasure and pain is well documented. It’s partially why horror movies and BDSM are popular
Destroy your muscle fibers with heavy metal plates
@@SunlightSentinel WE GO JIM
@@HeroicAge616 My brain will literally turn pain directly into waves of pleasure across my skin It can be distracting And worrying lol The worse the pain, if I focus on it, the more intense the waves It's like ASMR all over my body and a thousand times more intense So yeah, it can be physiological too, very real
@@ironspaghett Is that a neurological condition? That sounds like a crazy existence to live
this video is magical, i always come back whenever i feel outcasted, stressed and pathless
Being selfaware about the issues or problems to fix something but not following through, AND knowing why your not following through due to the subconscious history you've developed for said issue is another kind of endless dive into one's mind.
I got goosebumps reading fractions of his writings. It's so like my style of writing and thinking, convincing me that we are all connected beyond places, times and physical contacts. That tells us that everything is energy and those of same mindsets would express themselves in similar vibrations even when they never met each other and live in different centuries. How amazing.
We've pain&fear, peace, temptation, & motivation, perception, doubt & believe. Valuing many correlation, meaning many integration & disintegration. Labelling many purpose, then we've reality. Sometimes we feel empty, confuse, regret, & pain. We feel like to take care of those things. But we don't. bcoz we feel in love with those things. It's like paradox. We attach to those things. Is there something we can do bout it? What do we need to witness first? What do we need to do?
EXACTLY! i was just thinking the same💓
Nikola Tesla would agree with you as do I. Greetings from Germany!
Consciousness is a universal truth, the brain is just the antenna that taps into it for a short while
At the end of this life , there's Heaven and Hell. Don't live a lonely purposeless life when you should live for Jesus Christ. Yahweh made your life possible, don't live your life in elusive circles by unending lost philosophies of lost men. Jesus Christ has a purpose for you.
“Freedom is the possibility of isolation. You are free if you can withdraw from people, not having to seek them out for the sake of money, company, love, glory or curiosity, none of which can thrive in silence and solitude. If you can't live alone, you were born a slave. You may have all the splendours of the mind and the soul, in which case you're a noble slave, or an intelligent servant, but you're not free. And you can't hold this up as your own tragedy, for your birth is a tragedy of Fate alone. Hapless you are, however, if life itself so oppresses you that you're forced to become a slave. Hapless you are if, having been born free, with the capacity to be isolated and self-sufficient, poverty should force you to live with others.” ― Fernando Pessoa, The Book of Disquiet
As a Brazilian, having an author like Fernando Pessoa writing in my first language is fascinating. I deeply love his work, because he dominated language figures and its structure, so, he could translate beautifully feelings and sensations in a unique manner. The book of Disquiet made me cry so many times lol.
One of the best videos I have seen in a long time. Bravo 👏🏻 👏🏻👏🏻
I read It in French. I'm French. My favorite book ever "Le livre de l'intranquilité" While I'm writing this comment, I have the book on hands and I like to read It again and again because It is the mirror of my soul.
Its heartbreaking to see how underrated Pessoa is. Everyone should give his 'Book of Disquiet' a read, at least once. You'll thank him for eternity.
He is not underrated in the portuguese speaking world, and that’s a lot of people
@dpp5285 That isn't a lot of people. You also missed the commentors point. Portugal doesn't even make up 5% of the world's population.. probably much less. So try to keep perspective and context.
@@dpp5285 I'm taking the whole world into perspective. He's a Portuguese hero, no doubt, but others too should read him.
@@dpp5285other than portuguese. Should I read this ik english or spanish? Im fluent in both. Spanish is my first language. I only ask this because of the sameness of portuguese and spanish
@@theinfjgoyim5508 portuguese is a worlwide language.
Fernando Pessoa, one of the most amazing complex poet ever 💙
I’ve had to watch this video 5 times over and there’s still new parts I hear each time, great vid
But have you read the book?
When I was in junior high, I bought « The Book of Disquiet » by Fernando Pessoa after watching a Vsauce video. I barely read it or understood it at the time but now time has come full circle-having this video recommended to me and remembering that I have that book sitting on my shelf. Life is truly full of wonders.
Dude, I used to watch Vsauce too! But don't remember a mention of this book. But I do remember another about the cycles of social movements from periods of crisis>revolution>prosper>suspicion/awakening>again etc., and since then I haven't found that video again. I'm curious if by chance you remember too?
Update: I found the title of the book! Though I was never able to find that Vsauce video again, the book is called "The Fourth Turning: An American Prophecy" by William Strauss and Neil Howe.
Can you recall what was the video where Vsauce mentioned the book? Wanted to know the context
@@TheGabrielPTLike I mentioned, I was in junior high when I watched the video and purchased the book, so I can hardly recall the context of the video. I thought it was mentioned in the video about how people disappear, but he does not bring up the book when I watched it. If I had to guess, the video might have been a discussion about the perception of self and existence, based on the writings of Fernando Pessoa.
@@212MAY oh ok, ty.
10:25 “Sometimes…exposure to the ailment, is part of the treatment”…what a quote 👏
Can you explain what does it mean? Is it just like go out and face the world or something deep like doing something you don't want to?
this brought tears to my eyes. i've never thought i could relate to a man so much just like Fernando. might buy his book someday. really enjoyed this great video.
Hey! Not to discourage you from reading the book but i have heard it can be devastating and depressing. And I read in some reviews, that if you are a sensitive person, don't read it. The book can take you down a dark alley. So just proceed at your own caution. Hope the best for you!
I might read it one day, because i feel I have become extremely indifferent and strong through hard times.