I'm Starting Something New!(Saying No To The Cynics)
2024 ж. 10 Мам.
1 184 Рет қаралды
My Newsletter: benjaminantoine.substack.com
This year I'm saying no to the cynics.
Resolutions are something which I usually roll my eyes at. Hundred of thousands of people make resolutions every year and most people never stick to them.
But this year is different.
Something that keeps popping up in my recommendations of late is the regrets of the dying. Now I don’t know what that says about me but I do think It's a useful framework for setting resolutions and has in part inspired this video.
I hope you enjoy it.
Chapters:
00:00 - Intro - Ignoring the cynics
01:50 - Part 1 - Deprioritising my Career
03:56 - Part 2 - Be true to yourself
06:23 - Part 3 - Write everyday
#résolutions #makingachange #writing
Yes, live every day as if it's the last one. It's such a different way to experience life. Wonderful what you are doing! Congratulations!!
Thanks a lot Bee 🙏. W’ell see where we end up
Happy New Year! I love all your inspirations for 2024 - they seem to suit you perfectly, and you sure are a long stretch on your path with them! They all resonate with me, too. One can not fail to notice that you have written much and well already, so it will be interesting to see what happens next! (I'll continue my resolution from long ago, to start a new life every Monday, or to start life anew every Monday, to be truer to myself and what really matters to me.) Loved this video, again. All the best!
Thanks a lot. I new life every Monday. I like that! Great idea 😀
@@britingermany It is a bit self-ironic, but I'm such an idealist and dreamer... I'm delighted that you like it! 😀
Thank you Benjamin. I too am trying to refocus my life and I have identified writing as part of that process, probably nothing more elaborate than journaling. The other thing that I have found very useful is creating and maintaining a vision board. Sometimes pictures are worth a thousand words. I look forward to hearing more of your journey. We share the challenges of Brits in Germany, I am far behind you on the language though. Mike
Very glad to hear you’re on the journey of refocusing your life. I wish more people would take up that challenge
It's 2024 in New Zealand, Bro. It is 1 am. Happy New Year and a cup of kindness... Thank you so, so much for sharing such creativity and deep, positive thought with the world. You are a great role model. I have always made New Year's resolutions and I am prompted to set my goals with more intention today. I will return to my nursing care plan method with (nursing) diagnosis, aim, interventions, time frame & evaluation.😅
Happy new year. May 2024 bring you joy.
Kia ora from New Zealand. Firstly, you look so happy and it is so lovely to see. And your style is so warm, which I really enjoy. I am enjoying seeing your creations. You know, with scenes showing people, places and things that add beauty, thoughts and feelings. Also, I write such long comments that are laborious to read, that I think I will divide my comment into specific points instead.
Thank you very much for this. I’m afraid I only just found this comment now
well done for taking risks and embracing being a beginner. i think deprioritising work would do many people a lot of good (some of us got a sense of that during covid). your blog format and delivery is nice, and you're talented at it. And I like the quotes and reflections throughout.
Thanks a lot. I appreciate it 😀
I remember listening to a Kiwi lady, who lives in Germany talking about how she and her 3 children had been all very sick at once. I felt shocked to hear her husband from Germany couldn't take time off work to help her. When my father was unwell, my Kiwi partner walked out of his job almost immediately. I rounded up my son and we all were on the road within 2 hours and arrived 7 hours later. I am so grateful to my son for coming and taking care of "Nan", while we took Dad to hospital. My father had had a stroke. My partner and I talk about the amazing success of caring for my hard case father with dementia for nearly a year. Being involved in intense caring had a profound effect on my partner. Coincidentally, I could see that his mother also had dementia, and she wasn't just "doddery". I had heavily stressed the importance of listening. This important skill of listening in particular, and my love, combined with all his efforts, love and skill, lead to incredibly rewarding interactions with his Mum as she gradually lost her ability to speak. My partner helps me through family shit, then I help him, sometimes financially... he supported me with aging parents, then I got into helping him with his...it seems to be like that or both together. I sacrificed financially, but then he helps me with all kinds of stuff. We both regret losing touch with various people. Now I have cancer and go to hospital once a week for treatment. Neither of us have reached retirement age. My big rave is so hopefully someone reflects about what is important. My awesome nursing career does not match all these things with parents, partners, grandchildren and children. And, I also remember being sick in a bed with my 3 sick children. Just another kind of thing you remember when there is no one around to help. Just my 2 cents' worth about depriotising work..
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😀
Tena koutou, Now that I think about it, I wish I had settled for being poor and given a lot more time to my children when they were young. Money is not as important as it's made out to be. In fact, when we had no money, my children appreciated every single little thing, I didn't give them an excess of material things, and we were a lot more creative. A lot of children don't have enough of what they actually need.
Happy New Year and good for you drawing boundaries on work. I am doing the same. I am also going to retire in 18 months so need to spend this year thinking about what will replace this 37 hours a week of work.
That’s very exciting! It will give you so much time to explore new things. You might surprise yourself and discover some things you never knew about yourself
@@britingermany I am thinking more time for taking part in music and also maybe some voluntary work. Also more time for walking and exercise instead of sitting at a desk all day. Maybe do some travel too plus some further adult education courses etc.
@@neilfazackerley7758 that sounds great
Happy new year, Benjamin!
Thank you. Same to you :) Happy new year!
@@britingermany Best of luck in 2024 with all these new steps!
Tena koutou, This wonderful video helps me to really appreciate aspects of my life. I was a nurse and I retired when I was 50. I guess I am lucky to have cared for people in their own homes, in facilities, and in hospital when they were dying. I cared for my Wiltshire partner at home when he was dying. My friends who were all nurses helped me to wash and turn him. I also cared for my mother, father and to a much lesser extent, my present partner's mother, ("Mum") before they died. All 4 people had dementia. I have thought a lot about all sorts of topics around this whole area, including "regrets". In fact, Edith Piaff's voice sometimes comes into my mind. My wish is for all of us, is to do what Ben is doing. Life is short.
Wow that sounds very intense. My deepest respect looking after people with dementia can be soul destroying
@@britingermany It is caring for each of these 4 people that has given me the greatest of satisfaction. Also looking after a 3 week old granddaughter for 11 days while her Mum was in hospital and another 9 month old granddaughter, 5 days a week while her Mum worked. It just seems to have been my calling. That's all. Even more rewarding than working in a public hospital. This relates to your video...and putting relationships ahead of work. Everyone has a different set of talents, eh. My regret is trying to do too much when my children needed more of me. I just hope it gives someone food for thought.
I wish you luck on your new journey through life. I can relate to what you’re saying. Very much so, in fact. Being true to oneself, leading an authentic life, is far easier said than done. One must work at it. So many of us are taught from a young age to live our lives in a way that pleases others. It starts when we are children, when we learn to please our parents, older siblings, uncles, and aunts, and then it spreads out from there, I believe. Eventually, when we study, we wish to please our teachers, lecturers and professors. Then, when we enter the workplace, we end up trying hard to please our employers. It’s a never-ending process. A not-so-merry-go-round! I am a little older than you are. Of that, I am sure. I am also retired. When my mother died many years ago, I promised myself that I would start to live my life on my own terms. I have tried hard to do so ever since. Though, I hasten to add, I am still working on it! Habits of a lifetime are neither easily nor quickly broken. I can confirm that being oneself is a very pleasing thing. These days, I say things openly that in previous years I would never have dreamt of saying! Sometimes, one pinches oneself! And then I tell myself: What the hell! One thing I have learnt that is very important, and it is this: Other people truly don’t give a damn what I think of them; so then I have to ask myself why the hell am I worrying about what they think of me? I hope I master all this before it’s too late. Again, good luck on your journey.
Go for it. I was very conscientious and worked very hard. I contracted encephalitis as a consequence of all the stress. My employer sacked me. Of course they had no gratitude or remorse. Live for yourself on your terms before it's too late.
@@phyllisbennett5414 It saddens me that your employer was so cruel, thoughtless and heartless. I know how dreadful encephalitis is. I once taught a Swiss lady in Zürich who had contracted it many years before. She explained to me much about the illness. Then, many years later, my late mother, when she was extremely ill before her death and whom I cared for 24/7, was thought to have had it. Though, as it turned out, she did not. But because of these experiences in years gone by, and as I was caring for my mother prior to her death, I read up a lot about the illness. I informed myself well. As things turned out, my mother was ill with something else, but I know for a fact that encephalitis is an awful malady. That your employer could have been so uncaring and thoughtless as to sack you with such an illness is the height of cruelty. It surprises me not one jot that such a person would express neither remorse nor gratitude for your services. Your sad story is a warning to us all - a warning that we are alone in this world, a warning that we should try hard to be aware of our own priorities, but hopefully without being selfish. Selfishness is not a recommended _modus operandi_ for anyone who calls mismeslf/herself civilised.
@@xelakram how did the lady you taught cope?
Agreed! It’s a process of repeatedly checking in with yourself and making sure you’re doing things for the right reasons.
@@phyllisbennett5414 I got to know her very many years after her illness. By the time I got to know her, she was in very good shape. One would never have said that she had lever ived though such a trauma. She was a vary erudite, intelligent and clever lady.
Resolution #2 will likely turn out to be the hardest one to follow. Nevertheless, those who do not try have already failed. Good luck, and a happy year 2024.
Definitely! I will do my best 🙏
follow your heart
Yes indeed
The music in parts (especially the beginning) is a bit loud in contrast to your voice. I didn't really get the first half minute because it takes me too much power (and time through rehearing). :< Is it only me? (I'm bad at filtering voices)
Thanks for the feedback. Yeah it probably was a bit too loud. I was trying out something new
@@britingermany I'm glad that you took it as such.^^
I didn't notice because I always have the text written on my screen. I also find Bejamin deep and speaks at a pace. I always listen to him a few times so I take it in quite well. If I didn't do all that, maybe I would notice the same as what you have found.
Cynics are spot on with the public transport. DB has become a meme at this point as it’s so bad.